Unexpected Reality (22 page)

“Delivery just pulled in,” Tyler says, watching me closely.

“I better go. You have my number if anything comes up. Dad is back in town Friday.” She waves to each of us before rushing out the door.

What the hell just happened?
I almost kissed him. I
wanted
to kiss him. I can still feel the rough pad of his thumb as it traced my bottom lip. He’s mourning and lonely, and I almost took advantage of that. Even knowing he’s hurting, I still want it. I still want to kiss him.

I’m going to Hell.

I arrive at work right at eight and it’s crazy already. The first hour of appointments all got here at the same time. It’s a relief really; being on the floor keeps my mind focused . . . Well, more so than it would be if I was just sitting in my office. The morning flies by, which I’m thankful for.

“Hey, you bring lunch?” Dawn asks.

“No, I left in a rush to check on the house.”

She laughs. “I can tell from that blush on your cheeks that you got to see the guys. One in particular?”

“They were all there,” I tell her.

“And?”

“And what?”

“And you would not be blushing just from seeing them. Grab your purse, we’re going out to lunch,” she demands.

I do as she says, hoping some fresh air will do me some good. We walk to the diner down the street. The place is packed, but we’re able to find a small table near the door. As soon as the waitress takes our order, Dawn’s on me.

“Spill.” She crosses her arms over her chest and sits back against the chair.

“They were all there. The house looks good, it’s coming along.”

“Kendall,” she says in warning.

I huff out a breath. “Fine! I almost kissed him,” I hiss.

A smile brightens her face. “You almost kissed him?”

“Yes, no, I mean I don’t know. We almost kissed. He’s mourning and lonely and raising this baby on his own and vulnerable, and I took advantage of that!” I whisper-yell at her.

“Okay, first of all, he’s a grown man. Yes, he’s now a single father, but do you know the full story? How do you know if he’s mourning? He doesn’t look like he just lost the love of his life to me.”

“He has to stay strong for his son,” I say, exasperated.

She looks over my shoulder then leans in. “You wanted to kiss him.” It’s not a question, more of a statement.

“Yes! Yes, I wanted to kiss him,” I say, louder than intended.

It’s then that I feel strong hands on my shoulders and hot breath next to my ear. “I wanted it too, sweet girl.”

Ridge.

I look across the table at Dawn, and she’s got a smug look on her face. Bitch! She knew he was back there.

Ridge gently massages my shoulders as he and the guys say hello to Dawn.

“You guys want to join us?” Dawn asks.

I close my eyes and pray they say no. Not to mention that we only have a small four-person booth. There are seven of us now, and these guys are huge—no way they would fit.

“No room, sweetheart,” Mark replies.

“We can—” I kick her under the table. “Ouch!” She glares at me, all the guys laughing.

I can feel the burn of the flush of my cheeks for the second time today in their presence.

“I think we’ll just grab a seat at the counter,” Ridge says.

Dawn and the guys say “good-bye” and “nice to see you” and all that. Ridge still has his hands on my shoulders. I shiver when I feel his hot breath next to my ear. “We’ll get there, you and me. It’s going to happen, Kendall.” He kisses my cheek and then he’s gone. The warmth of his hands, the feel of his hot breath, the deep timbre of his voice, the woodsy scent of his cologne—gone.

Unable to stop myself, I watch him saunter off toward the counter. I don’t turn away until he’s seated. When I do finally pull my eyes from him, Dawn is smirking as she hands me a napkin. I raise my eyebrows in question.

“You got a little something, right here.” She points to her chin.

“We are no longer friends,” I pout.

She throws her head back and laughs.

“Eat,” I mumble as I pick up my cheeseburger and take a huge bite. I’ve lost my appetite but if we’re both eating, I hope we can avoid any more talk about Ridge and any further embarrassment for me. I’ve reached my limit for the day.

Our waitress appears about ten minutes later, asking if we need anything.

“Just the check,” I tell her.

She grins. “Those gentlemen at the counter took care of that.” She points over her shoulder.

“Thank you.”

Dawn and I both lay tips on the table and stand. “We have to say thank you,” she tells me.

I nod, knowing we do. It would be rude not to, and it was nice of them. We walk to where they’re sitting and Dawn hops on the stool next to Mark on one end. Ridge is sitting on the other. I step behind him and admire the way his Beckett Construction T-shirt forms to his muscles. Without thinking, I reach out and place my hand just below his shoulder blades. He turns his head at the contact.

At first, he looks annoyed until he works out that it’s me. I step closer. He doesn’t move his body, but turns his head to face me. I take another step closer, my hand still resting on his back. We’re close. It’s . . . intimate.

“Hey, sweet girl,” he says softly.

“Thank you, for lunch. You didn’t have to do that.” The words tumble out of me.

“You’re welcome.”

Neither one of us moves. His eyes are so dark, a deep chocolate color. I find it easy to get lost in them, in him. I slide my hand up his back to where it’s resting on his shoulder. He surprises me when he tilts his head and kisses my fingers.

“Ready to go?” Dawn’s chipper voice asks from behind me.

No. I don’t want to leave. I want to stay in this moment. Just need another minute. One more minute to be lost in him. “Yeah,” I say instead. As I go to pull away, Ridge places his hand over mine.

“I’ll see you soon.” His voice is low, just for me.

I don’t respond, just pull my hand from his shoulder, wave to the guys who are watching us closely, then turn and walk as quickly as I can out of the diner.

Dawn throws her arm over my shoulders. “That was hot as hell.”

I look at her like she’s lost her damn mind.

“Sexual tension at its finest. I think you’re wrong, by the way.”

“How so?”

“About the ‘mourning rebound’ thing. You need to talk to him. Be straight up, get it from the horse’s mouth and all that.”

I think about that the rest of the short walk back to the office, and surprise surprise, the rest of the afternoon as well.

Dawn has an appointment at Reagan’s shop to get a manicure. “You sure you don’t want to come with me?”

“Yeah, it’s been a long day. I just want to chill. Tell Reagan I said hello.”

“All right then, see you later.”

I breathe a sigh of relief as soon as the door closes behind her. All day, I’ve tried to put up a front that today has not been the hardest in history to keep focused. Now that it’s just me, I can let my mind replay it all, in slow motion. Every touch, every word, every breath between us. I think about what Dawn said, and he doesn’t seem like a man in mourning. But then what does that say about him? Ridge is a good guy, and that seems out of character for him. Dawn’s words filter through my mind.
You don’t know the full story.
But I want to. I want to know what happened, know how he’s handling all of this. I want to be there for him for reasons both selfish and unselfish. I’m such a hypocrite. I want to be someone he can lean on because he needs it. I also want to be that person just to be next to him.

Ping.
I jump from the couch and run to get my phone from the kitchen, all the while praying it’s him.

Ridge: How was your day?

I’m sure my smile is blinding, just from a simple text message.

Me: Uneventful.

Work was smooth today. Thank goodness. We had a full schedule, but nothing out of the ordinary.

Me: Yours?

Ridge: Great, actually.

Me: Good deal.

Lame, I know. What else do I say? ‘Tell me, I want to hear about every second’?

Ridge: It is. Want to hear about it?

Do I? Hell yes, I do. I type a response but wait to send it, slowly counting to sixty first. I don’t want to sound desperate—when, in reality, that’s exactly what I am. Desperate for any little piece of interaction with this man.

Me: Yes.

I clutch my phone in my hands, waiting for his next message. Time seems to creep as I wait, staring at the screen. When it rings, I jump and my phone goes flying. When I finally have it back in my hands, I see the screen.

‘Ridge calling.’

I wait forever for her reply and when it finally comes, I smile. Three little letters—YES. Knox is asleep in my arms; he’s got a full belly and couldn’t resist the pull. I know I should put him down, he’s going to want to be held all the time—at least that’s what Mom tells me—but he’s peaceful, and to be honest, I just like to snuggle the little guy. It’s a shock to me, but he’s mine, a part of me. That makes a difference.

I’ve been using text-to-speech; it’s much faster than texting with one hand. Just as I’m about to reply, I decide that I need to hear her voice. I bring up her name and hit send. It rings more times than I would like, and just as I’m about to hang up and text her to ask why she won’t talk to me, she answers.