Unfinished Business (28 page)

Saint Paul writes
I Timothy 5:8, Bible, King James Version (New York: Thomas Nelson Publishers, 1971).

“Men are the protectors”
Verse 4:34, “The Women,” English translation, Quranic Arabic Corpus,
corpus.quran.com/​translation.jsp?​chapter=4&verse=34
.

a mere 2 million men
Gretchen Livingston, “Growing Number of Dads Home with the Kids; Chapter 2: Why Are Dads Staying Home?,” Pew Research Center Social and Demographic Trends, June 5, 2014,
pewsocialtrends.org/​2014/06/05/​chapter-2-why-are-​dads-staying-home
.

Only 8 percent of Americans
Wendy Wang, Kim Parker, and Paul Taylor, “Breadwinner Moms,” Pew Research Center Social and Demographic Trends, May 29, 2013,
pewsocialtrends.org/​2013/05/29/​breadwinner-moms/2
.

When asked the same question with a gender flip
Paul Taylor, ed., “The Decline of Marriage and Rise of New Families,” Pew Research Center Social and Demographic Trends, November 18, 2010,
pewsocialtrends.org/​files/2010/11/​pew-social-​trends-2010-families.pdf
.

The resulting shift in economic power
Liza Mundy,
The Richer Sex: How the New Majority of Female Breadwinners Is Transforming Sex, Love and Family
(New York: Simon & Schuster, 2012); Hanna Rosin,
The End of Men: And the Rise of Women
(New York: Riverhead, 2012).

The even bigger story
“United States: The Rich and the Rest,”
Economist
, October 13, 2012,
economist.com/​node/​21564418
.

Senator Elizabeth Warren
Elizabeth Warren and Amelia Warren Tyagi, The Two-Income Trap: Why Middle-Class Parents Are Going Broke (New York: Basic Books, 2004).

average mortgage expenses had risen
Bradford Plumer, “The Two-Income Trap,”
Mother Jones
, November 8, 2004,
motherjones.com/​politics/2004/11/​two-income-trap
.

In the intervening years
Dylan Matthews, “Wages Aren't Stagnating, They're Plummeting,”
Washington Post
, July 31, 2012,
washingtonpost.com/​blogs/​wonkblog/​wp/2012/07/31/​wages-arent-​stagnating-theyre-plummeting
.

Nearly 50 percent of millennial men
Eileen Patten and Kim Parker, “A Gender Reversal on Career Aspirations,” Pew Research Center Social and Demographic Trends, April 19, 2012,
pewsocialtrends.org/2012/04/19/​a-gender-reversal-​on-career-aspirations
.

“I have told Susie”
“Read an Excerpt of Liza Mundy's ‘The Richer Sex,' ” ABC News, January 9, 2014,
abcnews.go.com/​blogs/​politics/2014/01/​read-an-excerpt-of-liza-​mundys-the-richer-sex
.

According to Mundy
Liza Mundy, “Daddy Track: The Case for Paternity Leave,”
Atlantic
, January/February 2014,
theatlantic.com/​magazine/​archive/2014/01/​the-daddy-track/​355746/2
.

Numerous books on the subject
Some of these books accept the idea of balance; others reject balance but promise happiness anyway; still others suggest the helpful idea of fit. See Sharon Meers and Joanna Strober,
Getting to 50/50: How Working Parents Can Have It All
(Berkeley: Cleis Press, 2013); A. Roger Merrill and Rebecca R. Merrill,
Life Matters: Creating a Dynamic Balance of Work, Family, Time, & Money
(New York: McGraw-Hill, 2003); Teresa A. Taylor,
The Balance Myth: Rethinking Work-Life Success
(Austin: Greenleaf Book Group Press, 2013); Matthew Kelly,
Off Balance: Getting Beyond the Work-Life Balance Myth to Personal and Professional Satisfaction
(New York: Hudson Street Press, 2011); Cali Williams Yost,
Work + Life: Finding the Fit That's Right for You
(New York: Riverhead, 2004); and Joan Blades and Nanette Fondas,
The Custom-Fit Workplace: Choose When, Where, and How to Work and Boost Your Bottom Line
(San Francisco: Jossey-Bass, 2010).

American workers
Kiera Butler, Dave Gilson, Josh Harkinson, Andy Kroll, and Laura McClure, “Harrowing, Heartbreaking Tales of Overworked Americans,”
Mother Jones
, July/August 2011,
motherjones.com/​politics/2011/06/​stories-overworked​-americans
.

Public health experts
“Stress in America: Paying with Our Health,” American Psychological Association, February 4, 2015,
apa.org/​news/​press/​releases/​stress/2014/​stress-report.pdf
.

Indeed, the United States
“Adult Labor and Working Conditions: Rankings,” World Policy Forum, 2015,
worldpolicyforum.org/​topics/​adult-labor-and-working-conditions/​rankings
.

The firm's brass
Irene Padavic, Robin Ely, and Erin Reid, “The Work-Family Narrative as a Social Defense: Explaining the Persistence of Gender Inequality in Organizations,” Harvard Business School Working Paper, March 2015.

“What do I want people to worry about”
Ibid.

in 2013 women earned 82 cents
“Highlights of Women's Earnings in 2013,” U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics, Report 1051, December 2014,
bls.gov/opub/​reports/​cps/​highlights-of-​womens-earnings-in-2013.pdf
.

But hidden within that average
Michelle J. Budig, Joya Misra, and Irene Boeckmann, “The Motherhood Penalty in Cross-National Perspective: The Importance of Work-Family Policies and Cultural Attitudes,”
Social Politics: International Studies in Gender, State & Society
19, no. 2 (2012): 163–93.

Single women without children
Mark Perry and Andrew G. Biggs, “The ‘77 Cents on the Dollar' Myth About Women's Pay,”
Wall Street Journal
, April 7, 2014,
wsj.com/​articles/​SB1000142405270230353​2704579483752909957472
.

They make 76 cents
Claire Cain Miller, “The Upshot: The Motherhood Penalty vs. the Fatherhood Bonus,”
New York Times
, September 6, 2014,
nytimes.com/2014/09/07/​upshot/​a-child-helps-your-​career-if-youre-​a-man.html
.

motherhood is now a greater predictor
Stephanie Coontz, “Progress at Work, but Mothers Still Pay a Price,”
New York Times
, June 9, 2013,
nytimes.com/2013/06/09/​opinion/​sunday/​coontz-richer-childless-women​-are-making-​the-gains.html
;
Kristin Rowe-Finkbeiner, “The Real Feminist Nightmare,”
Politico
, November 25, 2013,
politico.com/​magazine/​story/2013/11/​the-real-feminist-​nightmare-not-michelle-obama-100339.html​#.VWX-Y0ZBEnM
.

women between the ages of twenty-five and thirty-four
“On Pay Gap, Millennial Women Near Parity—for Now,” Pew Research Center Social and Demographic Trends, December 11, 2013,
pewsocialtrends.org/2013/12/11/​on-pay-​gap-millennial-women-​near-parity-for-now
.

But those gains dissipate
Ibid.

To the majority of men and women
Wendy Wang, Kim Parker, and Paul Taylor, “Breadwinner Moms,” Pew Research Center Social and Demographic Trends, May 29, 2013,
pewsocialtrends.org/2013/05/29/​breadwinner-moms
.

Women are indeed the considerable majority
Kim Parker and Wendy Wang, “Modern Parenthood,” Pew Research Center Social and Demographic Trends, March 2013,
pewsocialtrends.org/2013/03/14/​modern-​parenthood-roles-of-moms-​and-dads-converge-as-they-​balance-work-and-family
.

the typical caregiver of an elderly relative
“Family Caregiving: The Facts,” Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, September 2011,
cdc.gov/​aging/​caregiving/​facts.htm
.

Her decision to leave them
Amanda Marcotte, “Wendy Davis' Daughters: Our Mom Did a Great Job,”
Slate
, January 21, 2014,
slate.com/​blogs/xx_factor/2014/01/28/​was_wendy_davis_​a_bad_mother_because_her_husband_​contributed_a_lot_of_childcare.html
.

Rahm Emanuel left his young children
Manny Fernandez and Laurie Goodstein, “Life Story of Wendy Davis Swings from Strength to Flash Point in Texas Campaign,”
New York Times
, January 29, 2014,
nytimes.com/2014/01/30/​us/​texas-democrat-defends-​back-story-under-​criticism.html
.

A physician who had two kids
Email to Anne-Marie Slaughter, February 22, 2013.

43 percent of the
men
“Life Interests—1992 and 2012,” Work/Life
Integration Project, Wharton School, University of Pennsylvania,
worklife.wharton.upenn.edu/​research/​life-interests-​of-wharton-students/​1992-and-2012
. For a more descriptive account of the findings, see Stewart D. Friedman,
Baby Bust: New Choices for Men and Women in Work & Family
(Philadelphia: Wharton Digital Press, 2013).

a third of male millennial HBS grads
Robyn Ely, Pamela Stone, and Colleen Ammerman, “Rethinking What You ‘Know' About High-Achieving Women,”
Harvard Business Review
, December 2014,
hbr.org/2014/12/​rethink-what-you-know-​about-high-​achieving-women
.

“Most men stress”
Marc Tracy, “Here Come the Daddy Wars,”
New Republic
, June 14, 2013,
newrepublic.com/​article/113490/​daddy-wars-will-​be-mommy-wars-men
.

an almost equal number of fathers and mothers
Kim Parker and Wendy Wang, “Modern Parenthood: Roles of Moms and Dads Converge as They Balance Work and Family,” Pew Research Center Social and Demographic Trends, March 14, 2013,
pewsocialtrends.org/​files/2013/03/​FINAL_modern_parenthood​_03-2013.pdf
.

Or more precisely
Joan Williams,
Unbending Gender: Why Family and Work Conflict and What to Do About It
(New York: Oxford University Press, 2000), p. 22.

“the face-time warrior”
Brigid Schulte,
Overwhelmed: Work, Love and Play When No One Has the Time
(New York: Sarah Crichton Books, 2014), p. 77.

The firm's key HR problem
Padavic, Ely, and Reid, “The Work-Family Narrative as a Social Defense,” p. 19.

As Padavic, Ely, and Reid wryly conclude
Ibid., p. 20.

“ ‘Fixing the women's problem' ”
Debora L. Spar,
Wonder Women: Sex, Power, and the Quest for Perfection
(New York: Sarah Crichton Books, 2013), p. 201.

“I am beyond tired”
Email to Anne-Marie Slaughter, April 8, 2013.

Twenty percent of U.S. companies
Ariane Hegewisch and Yuko Hara, “Maternity, Paternity, and Adoption Leave in the
United States,” Institute for Women's Policy Research, May 2013,
iwpr.org/​publications/​pubs/​maternity-paternity-and-adoption​-leave-in-​the-united-states-1
.

36 percent allow employees
Kenneth Matos and Ellen Galinksy, “2014 National Study of Employers,” Families and Work Institute, April 2014,
familiesandwork.org/​downloads/2014NationalStudyOf​Employers.pdf
.

The HR department may roll out flex policies
Ibid., p. 30.

the National Study of Employers finds a virtual chasm
Ibid.

“can't get someone right there”
Fredric R. Van Deusen, Jacquelyn B. James, Nadia Gill, Sharon P. McKechnie, “Overcoming the Implementation Gap,” Boston College Center for Work and Family, February 2007, p. 30,
bc.edu/​content/​dam/​files/​centers/​cwf/​research/​publications/​pdf/​BCCWF%20​Flex%20Study%202007.pdf
.

“Girls don't ask”
Patrick Jenkins and Harriet Agnew, “Sexism and the City,”
Financial Times
, January 17–18, 2015,
ft.com/​intl/​cms/​s/2/7c182ab8-9c33​-11e4-b9f8-​00144feabdc0.html#axzz3UTFyp2mH
.

“flexibility stigma”
Joan C. Williams, Jennifer Glass, Shelley Correll, and Jennifer L. Berdahl, Special Issue: The Flexibility Stigma,
Journal of Social Issues
, 69, no. 2 (2013).

“flexibility is as valuable as compensation”
Email to Anne-Marie Slaughter, June 21, 2012.

a law firm associate named Carlos
Joan Blades and Nanette Fondas, p. 48.

even if his firm had said yes
Scott Coltrane, Elizabeth C. Miller, Tracy DeHaan, and Lauren Stewart, “Fathers and the Flexibility Stigma,”
Journal of Social Issues
69, no. 2 (2013): 279–302.

Patterns like these
Anna Beninger and Nancy M. Carter, “The Great Debate: Flexibility vs. Face Time,” Catalyst, July 2013,
catalyst.org/​knowledge/​great-debate-​flexibility-vs-​face-time-busting-myths-behind-​flexible-work-arrangements
.

More than 70 percent
Maria Shriver, “The Female Face of Poverty,”
Atlantic
, January 8, 2014,
theatlantic.com/​business/​archive/2014/01/​the-female-​face-of-poverty/282892
.

Consider the case of Rhiannon Broschat
Jon Graef, “Fired Whole Foods Worker Rhiannon Broschat-Salguero: ‘I'm Not Going to Choose My Job Over My Son,' ”
Chicagoist
, February 9, 2014,
chicagoist.com/2014/02/09/​fired_whole_foods_​worker_rhiannon_b.php
.