Vicious Circles (26 page)

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Authors: J. L. Paul

Tags: #General Fiction

BOOK: Vicious Circles
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I stepped on the accelerator, suddenly anxious to get to Col in’s to find out.

Chapter Twenty

Col in took me by the hand as soon as he let us into the house. He towed me directly to the sofa and sat me down.

“I’m going to let the dog out and get us something to drink,” he said, his eyes solemn. “Then we’l talk.” I could only nod.

Closing my eyes, I rested my head on the back of the couch. I listened as he coaxed Milo out of his crate and out the back door. I heard him open the refrigerator fol owed by his soft footsteps returning to the living room. He plopped down beside me and only then did I open my eyes.

“Here,” he said as he handed me a soda. He set his on the coffee table. “Talk to me, Bailey. Tel me what happened.” I sipped at my soda, stal ing so I could get my thoughts together. I started to slowly describe the entire day, beginning with my idea to involve Craig, and picked up speed as I got to the part about the club. When I told him about the incident in the room upstairs, he cursed and rose quickly from the sofa.

“That’s exactly why I didn’t want you to go!” he said, spinning away from me. “He could have real y hurt you.”

“But he didn’t,” I objected. “And I managed to take perfect care of myself.”

“Did you?” he said as he faced me again. He crossed the room and dropped to his knees before me, lifting a finger to gently trace my cheek.

“Is that why you have a mark on your face?”

I jerked my head away from him. “That was nothing. I think he came off worse.”

“No doubt about that,” Col in said as he squeezed my hand. “But it could have turned out real y bad.”

“But it didn’t, Col in,” I said as I leapt to my feet, jerking my hand out of his grip. I stalked toward the kitchen but he fol owed. I scrubbed my hand over my face, wincing slightly as I brushed the tender spot on my cheek. “It didn’t, okay? Now it’s over with – can we please move past it?”

“Not yet,” he said sternly, his voice directly behind me. “Not until you realize just how lucky you are and not until you realize how serious the situation could have been.”

“Everything turned out fine, okay?” I said, frustrated. I turned to face him, angry that he wouldn’t just drop it. “Why are you dwel ing on what could have happened?”

“Because I was scared, Bailey,” he said, glaring at me. “I was afraid that he was going to do something terrible to you. I didn’t want to see you in worse shape than Tori.”

“And I didn’t want to see Morgan that way, either,” I defended.

“Why do you care so much, huh?” he asked in disbelief, lifting his hands in the air and letting them fal helplessly to his sides. “After the way she’s treated you and Irelyn? Why are you stil so desperate to save her? You did nothing wrong to her.

And so what if she’s upset that we slept together – that’s something she needs to get over on her own.”

“I don’t know,” I sighed. “I wish I didn’t care. She sort of reminds me of how I used to be a long time ago – only, maybe a little more naïve. I guess I didn’t want to see her turn out to be like how I am now.”

“Geez,” he groaned. “Bailey, you’re not bad. You’re the one who likes to let people think that but I know better. I know what you’re real y like and so do those that are closest to you. Morgan knows what you’re like deep down, too.”

“Don’t psychoanalyze me, Col in,” I warned as I poked a finger in his chest. “I don’t want it and I don’t need it.”

“I’m not,” he said as he leaned on the doorframe. “Honest. I’m just trying to understand why you’d take such a chance.” He blew a puff of air at his bangs.

“Guess I sort of knew al along.”

His last comment took me by surprise and I raised a curious brow. “What did you know?” A tiny smile appeared in the corners of his mouth. “That super-overprotective Bailey would swoop down and rescue her friend, no matter the danger to herself.

“I didn’t need to be rescued,” I said, straightening my spine. “I told you I could handle him.” He reached out to chuck me under the chin, his smile proud. “I know.

But I was stil worried.” I lifted a shoulder and shuffled my feet, studying the remarkably clean floor. When did the man find time to clean? And why was his house always cleaner than mine? I sighed, dispel ing the housekeeping thoughts from my head.

“He’s al talk anyway.”

I remembered his ugly words that had settled in the bottom of my heart. They would rot there awhile and prod me from time to time – just to remind me that they were there, but eventual y I would forget about them. I’d get over it.

“What did he say to you that made you so upset?” Col in asked.

“Nothing,” I said defensively, gritting my teeth. “Nothing at al . He’s just ful of crap.”

“Did he say something about us?” Col in asked softly. “Tel me, Bailey.” I shook my head and expel ed a long breath. I folded my arms over my chest and avoided his eyes. He was stirring up the tears again and I’d cried enough lately to bathe in them – I would shed no more.

“It doesn’t matter what he said. He was only trying to make himself look good.”

“Tel me what he said,” Col in ordered, his voice stil soft but firm. “Please.” I shrugged and let my hands fal to my sides. I bit my lip and repeated what I could remember. “He mostly cal ed me a whore. He said I was trashy and it was a good thing Spencer and I split up because he deserved better.” I chanced a quick glance at Col in but his face was passive. I continued. “He said that he knew you and I had slept together – Morgan told him –

and that…” I had to swal ow to loosen the huge lump in my throat. “He said that I’d only embarrass you and that I wasn’t the type of girl that you would date. He said you’d sleep with me but that was al .” I raised a brow and faced him ful y. “He said you could never love someone like me.” His eyes narrowed as his head bobbed up and down slowly. A faraway look drifted across his face and I wondered if he’d heard a word I’d said. He snapped back to reality and touched my arm. “Do you believe that?”

“I don’t know,” I said in a shril voice. “I don’t know what to believe.”

“Damn it, Bailey!” he cursed, startling me. “What the hel ? I’ve gone out of my way to show you. I’ve cal ed you, come over, hung out with you. I pretended to be your boyfriend in front of that spiteful little bitch, and defended your honor. Last weekend, when you stayed with me, I did everything I could to show you how much I love you.”

He clenched his jaw and a flicker of pain passed over his face. “Hel , I even gave you a puppy!” He raked his fingers through his hair. “I mean, damn, what more do I have to do to prove to you that I love you?”

“What?” I said, doing a double take. “Huh?”

“What else do I have to do?” he asked.

I cleared the fog out of my brain as my mind focused on what he’d just asked. “How about just tel ing me!”

“You never would have believed me,” he said as he stepped closer, clutched my shoulders, and kissed me. “After that first night, I couldn’t get you out of my head.

I’d always been attracted to you but after that night, al I wanted was to be with you again – and not just in bed.” He released my shoulders and paced. “At first I thought I was just feeling guilty, but the more time I spent with you, the more I realized that that wasn’t it.”

“So, you do love me?” I asked, stil grappling with his words. “You love me?”

“Yes,” he grinned as he stopped in front of me. He pecked my lips. “I told Spencer I did and I told him I didn’t know if you felt the same but I thought you might.” He smiled feebly. “I spil ed the entire truth to him last night. He hung out over here after everyone else had left and we talked. I told him everything. I didn’t want him hearing about any of it from someone else. I was worried he’d be pissed but he took it al calmly. He was a little put out by it but he told me he’d get over it.” I snaked my arms around his neck. “I love you, too, you know,” I said quickly. “I realized it one day at the pool.” He furrowed his brow. “At the pool?”

“Don’t ask,” I said. “I, um, realized this before our first night. That’s why I broke up with Spencer.” His eyes darted al over my face before he leaned in and captured my lips with his. I fel into him and he tightened his hold. My heartbeat tripled.

“Bailey,” he said as he edged back. “I want to explain about Tori.”

“What about her?” I asked, my heart back on the defensive.

“Wel , you said something last night that got me thinking,” he said as he slipped his arms off my waist and took my hand. He led me back to the sofa and we sat together. “I never had anything going on with her – I hope you know that. When I left with her that week, I took her to see her parents.” He dropped his gaze to our entwined hands. “She drank a little too much one night and became depressed.

She contemplated…taking her life but she cal ed me instead.” I couldn’t believe it. What was going through her mind? Owen wasn’t worth al that.

“Why?”

“She’s embarrassed, Bailey. She’s embarrassed about her entire relationship with Owen. She messed around with drugs and he convinced her to…this has to stay between us, okay?” I nodded emphatical y. “He convinced her to do some…things she normal y wouldn’t. She didn’t prostitute herself or anything but he got her to do some things that she’s embarrassed about. She told me about it that night. Actual y, she cried a torrent of tears and total y fel apart and sort of blabbed it al . So, I drove her to her parents’ house out in the country the next morning and she begged me to stay. She wanted moral support. I couldn’t just leave her.”

“I understand,” I whispered, sympathy flooding me. I was more convinced than ever that I’d done the right thing.

“I’m sorry if you thought it was something else,” he said as he caught my eyes and smiled.

My heart flipped. “Don’t apologize. I should apologize. I thought you were in love with her.” He chuckled. “No, not at al . Oh, I do care about her, but she’s just a friend.”

“I feel pretty stupid,” I muttered and he dragged me into his lap, winding his arms around my middle.

“You feel pretty good to me,” he said, trying to lighten the mood.

I managed a smile. “That was real y cheesy.”

“Yeah, I know,” he shrugged as color flooded his cheeks.

I kissed him, putting al the love I could into it. My heart throbbed as he held me closer and deepened the kiss. His hands traveled up my sides and tangled in my hair. I shifted so that I was facing him and my legs were straddling his lap.

“Hang on, Bailey,” he mumbled in my mouth.

“What’s the matter?” I asked as I eased my face back to look at him.

He held my head in his hands as he caught his breath. “I don’t want to get carried away until we talk a few things out.”

“What’s left to say?” I asked as I pressed my breasts into his chest. I knew his weakness.

He glanced down but reluctantly dragged his eyes back up and focused on my face with a tiny smirk flittering on his lips. “Nice try.”

“Hey, a girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do,” I said.

He drew my face closer and kissed me again, softly. “I want to make sure everything is sorted, that’s al .”

“I love you, you love me – it’s sorted.” I faked a yawn and an exaggerated stretch.

“Now I’m tired. Let’s go to bed.” He chuckled but showed no signs of moving. “We wil but first I want to know something.”

“What?” I asked.

“What are we now?”

My heart stopped and I stared at him slack-jawed. “That’s what you’re worried about?”

“Wel , I’m not worried,” he said bashful y as he dropped his eyes. “Just curious.” I real y loved him even more. I slid off his lap and snatched his hand. I urged him to his feet and led him toward the bedroom. He made me wait as he let in the dog and put him in his crate. He rejoined me with a smile and fol owed me into the bedroom.

I pinned him against the door and stood on my toes to kiss him.

“I’m your girlfriend, Col in,” I declared. “You’re real one – not fake. I’m a little more serious about you than I ever was about Spencer.” I grinned at him and he relaxed.

“Okay, maybe a lot more serious but he doesn’t need to know that yet.”

“I do love you, Bailey,” he said as he backed me up to the bed. He lifted my shirt over my head and even though I was pretty tired, I perked up immediately. I helped him out of his clothes and crawled on the bed. I fumbled for his hand and tugged him on top of me. His eager lips found mine as my hands thoroughly explored the complicated muscles in his back.

His kisses burned a trail down my chin and throat, working their way to my breasts.

I grinned when a satisfied moan escaped his mouth.

“I’m a lucky man,” he whispered. I didn’t argue – just let him continue his ministrations. It didn’t take him long to return to my lips, his need pressing firmly against my leg. He whispered sweet words in my ear but I barely heard them. I was on fire and I wanted him terribly.

“Col in,” I groaned as I sank my nails into his shoulders. I arched into him, his body like a magnet for mine. I tasted the salty skin of his neck as I kissed and nipped out my frustrations. Final y, he put me out of my misery and slipped inside me, causing me to clamp down on his neck.

“Ow,” he chuckled as he kissed me. “That’s going to leave a mark.”

“Sorry,” I said, not the least bit perturbed. I was too busy matching his easy rhythm as I clung to his neck.

“No you’re not,” he laughed as he unlatched my hands and careful y pushed me flat on the mattress. He stil moved slowly, bringing me pleasure like I’d never known, but he watched my face careful y; brushing the hair out of eyes or kissing the corner of my mouth. My heart pounded wildly and it was so liberating to final y be able to express verbal y how I felt.

“I love you,” I whispered as his pace picked up speed. He kissed me again, unable to talk, as passion overtook us both. Shortly after, he col apsed beside me in a gasping heap.

I waited for his breathing to even, as wel as my own, before I cuddled up next to him. As I snuggled into him, I felt his chest vibrate with suppressed chuckles.

“What?” I asked.

He kissed the top of my head. “I can’t believe you thought I was in love with Tori.” I yawned, for real, and nestled my head under his chin. “Yeah, wel , what can I say?

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