Visions of Fire and Ice (The Petiri) (32 page)

She continued to ride him, her sobs of pleasure ringing in their small cocoon like a song written only for him. The muscles holding him tight spasmed, and, before he could gasp out his own pleasure, she exploded. Her body heat intensified, like a small detonation. A bright light ripped from her, and, like a thief, it stole his control, dragging his own climax from deep inside him. He thrust hard, holding her tight against him, his own ice cooling her hot skin as her body jerked and vibrated against him.

When at long last the sensations receded, he collapsed back, dragging her down on his chest. She didn’t move for long moments, her breath ragged, filled with soft sobs. Sobs he hoped were of joy.

He comforted her, his hands stroking her hair. He wanted to cry, too. Only it wasn’t sadness. He held in his arms the one, and only, mate for him, and it was he who brought her such pleasure.

For the first time he could remember, he felt utterly at peace.

Chapter Thirty-Two

Tamara opened her eyes, her gaze darting about her, absorbing her surroundings. She sat on a small bench in a large garden, with trees, each filled with flowers. Dogwoods, pear trees, even a few oak trees and palms. Others she couldn’t identify. Her eyes scanned the vegetation. Plants of all varieties grew beneath the trees, their perfume filling the air. The bright blue, yellow, and orange blossoms painted a picture of pure beauty.

In the distance, she heard music. Soft and beautiful.

A waltz.

Music, the way to her soul. Only this was different. Her body didn’t sway to the beat, for this was the melody of sadness. Deep, heartbreaking sadness.

“Dance with me.”

She started at the sound of the masculine voice and whirled around. Amunkha stood behind her, watching her. His strawberry blonde hair hung loose, his eyes warm and brown, his expression filled with sorrow.

“What’s happening? Where am I?” She was startled, but surprised she did not fear him.

“My apologies, Tamara.” He bowed to her. “I needed to speak with you. This,” he motioned to encompass the garden, “was the only way I could reach you.”

“What makes you think I’ll listen to anything you have to say?” Tamara examined him through narrowed eyes. She opened her mind to touch his emotions. The typical shiver of evil Amunkha normally aroused was gone and, in its place, was warmth and sadness.

Could he hide his true nature in a dream?

He took a step forward, and she stood, putting the bench between them.

“I am sorry. I do not mean to frighten you. My brother is a lucky man.” She hadn’t expected such a soft voice. He gave her a sad smile, and the music faded. “I knew the moment I saw you that you were the only one who could help me. First, let me explain. This,” he said, motioning with both arms toward the plants, “is inside my head. It is the only place I have been safe for many years, the only place I can find peace. He doesn’t know about it, doesn’t realize this is how I have kept my sanity, deep inside my own imagination.”

“He? Ramose?”

“No,” he replied softly. “Not Ramose, though he doesn’t know either.” His voice strengthened. “You may know him as Set, God of Chaos.” He motioned to the bench. “If you won’t dance, please sit, let me explain.”

When she hesitated, he added, “I promise, I mean you no harm. I need your help, and there is not much time.”

Warily, she circled the bench and sat at the end, expecting, yet fearing he would sit beside her. She was surprised when he remained standing. Maybe he sensed her discomfort.

He plucked a flower, inhaled the sweet floral scent. He looked so innocent, almost like a boy, lost in a beautiful fragrance. He turned his head, a smile on his lips, one that couldn’t hide the pain in his eyes. “I have always loved gardening. That’s why I created this place. It’s a mix of flowers and trees from our home world, combined with those from yours. Beautiful, are they not?”

She nodded, not letting her gaze follow his, instead, keeping her eyes on him. “What is it you want from me?”

“Now that you are here, it is hard to know where to begin. I have only had one other visitor in my dreams, and she was so terrified she would not speak with me.” Pain flashed through his eyes. “It seems strange to have you here now.”

“Why not start at the beginning?”

He nodded, keeping his eyes on hers. “Very well.” He took a deep breath, moving to the bench to sit on the opposite end, careful not to touch her. He dragged his hands through his hair.

“I’m sure Ramose has already told you of our arrival on your world, how we got here and our origins?” At her nod, he continued on. “Shortly after the crash, I was out foraging for food. It was scarce out in the desert, and many of our people were injured and dying. I needed to do something useful. I knew without food, we would all die, so I began to hunt. I searched for hours, finding nothing edible, when suddenly the sand collapsed beneath me. I hit hard, stunned, but not actually hurt. I’d landed in a small dark cavern, the only light coming from the hole I’d fallen through.

“I had no idea where I was at first. Then I saw what appeared to be a tomb. I hoped there would be food, as many ancient cultures on our world had left foodstuffs with the bodies of their loved ones for use in the afterlife. I grabbed a jar I saw and opened it.” Pain flashed through his eyes again, a deep foreboding sadness.

“Too late, a dark gas poured from the top. It rushed into my lungs, and my body felt ripped apart. I thought my head would explode from the pressure. My surroundings spun, and all went black. It was not poison in the jar. It was a spirit. I was never alone after that moment. It was the last time I had full control of my body.”

Tamara stared at him, uncomprehending.

“You opened a canopic jar?”

He nodded.

Canopic jars were not filled with food, but with the organs of the dead, removed during the mummification process. But there was no way a simple liver or heart could cause the reaction he described.

“Are you saying you are possessed?” Her dream heart pounded with fear. It couldn’t be possible, could it?

He nodded, averting his eyes. “With an evil spirit.” He gave an exhausted sigh, his shoulders sagging as though the world’s evil rested upon his shoulders.

“In the beginning, I did not understand what happened, nor did I understand why I was losing time and experiencing black outs. Our people were suddenly afraid and avoided me. Gradually, the spirit inside took over more and more. Eventually, I could see what he did, but could not stop him. With every person he murdered, the stronger he became. I have battled him for years, trying with everything inside me to rid myself of this being. As you can guess, I have been unsuccessful.” He sat silently, waiting to see if she believed.

Memories flashed through her mind. Instances when Amunkha hadn’t seemed quite so vicious. The comments he made in the restaurant in the hotel, when his eyes had changed color. It was all beginning to make some kind of weird sense. Ramose’s brother wasn’t malevolent after all, though he was being used for evil.

“You believe me,” he whispered, his voice filled with hope.

Tamara swallowed the knot lodged in her throat. The possibilities this dream presented were both frightening and exciting.

“Yes, I believe you.” She hesitated. “But what do you need from me?”

Music began again, poignant in its sadness. He stood from the bench. “Dance with me? I have so wanted to dance with someone for so long. I do adore music.” He held his hand out to her, palm up.

Tamara hesitated. If she touched him, even in this dream world, would she know if he was telling the truth? Could the evil within him change places? She met the chocolate brown eyes and lifted her hand to his. His fingers closed about hers, and she bit back the instant of panic, breathing through her mouth to ease the sudden pounding of her heart.

He pulled her to her feet and twirled her about. He seemed almost delicate in comparison to Ramose, but he held her in firm arms as he guided her across the grass. After a few moments, he continued his story.

“I grow weaker with every passing year. Once I understood the full impact of what was happening, I sometimes interfered, working against him, distracting him enough to allow the escape of those he threatened. But those opportunities grow more and more rare. For centuries, I have been forced to sit back and watch the atrocities he commits against those I love, against innocent men and women. He’s fascinated with death and pain. He feeds off their fear. Total chaos reigns everywhere he goes. Each death makes him stronger and makes me weaker.”

“And he’s Set, God of Chaos? He’s the one inside of you?”

He nodded. “It’s who he thinks he is. I do not know for sure if it’s him, or an evil spirit pretender. One thing I know is he wants to kill Ramose, and I cannot allow that.” He took a deep breath, as if steeling himself. “I need you to help me. I need you to kill me.”

She stepped on his toes in surprise.

“Kill you?” Her voice broke. No. She couldn’t kill him! He was Ramose’s brother. And especially not now that she knew it wasn’t him doing the killing, but Set.

“It is time. I can no longer keep my sanity, hiding in a garden in my mind. I have fought to keep Ramose alive, but I know I can no longer do either. Set has grown too powerful.”

She shook her head, horror washing through her. “I can’t kill you. Ramose would never forgive me! You’re his brother. No matter what’s happened, he loves you. I’ll tell him what’s happening. Together, we can—”

“No. You have to do this. There is no other option,” he corrected. “Ramose could never do so. He’s had ample opportunity over time, and always he fails. I think he wishes to fail. And, if anyone else did, he would never be able to forgive them, anger would eat away at him, destroy him.

“You are the only one, as his
Kha-Ib
who can do this. You are the only one he will forgive and love. He would not blame you because you are the heart of his soul.”

Her head continued to shake. She heard all he said, but refused to allow it to sink in. She could not kill him, she couldn’t!

“I can’t do this.” Her eyes filled with unshed tears. “I can’t kill anyone. I can’t kill you.”

“Please,” he begged. “Without this, Ramose will die. He is my brother, but I can no longer protect him. He has you to help him get through this. Please help me to save him.”

Tears spilled down her cheeks. Amunkha looked so young, so innocent. Not a man to be feared, but a man to be protected. It was hard to believe this man had held a knife to her, that he’d stabbed her in the stomach.

“How can I destroy a man who has suffered as much as you have? How could I live with myself? There must be another way.”

“You are the only one who can do this. You must do this. Unless…”

He hesitated.

“Unless what?” Hope filled her heart. There had to be another way. There must be another way.

“If you cannot kill me, you must find a way to destroy Set.” He stopped dancing, pursing his lips. “He uses dark magick, and Ramose has no knowledge to help him fight against him. I know you are not trained like we were, but perhaps…”

Her pulse raced as she looked up at him. “You think I can fight dark magick?”

He shrugged his wide shoulders. “You are powerful. More powerful than any of our people. You have gifts from your human side that enhance the gifts that are innate in us. I felt it in you, saw it when you were in the dining room with Set. The only way to get rid of him is to banish him from me. He can only be stopped by someone who is more powerful than he. Will you try?”

Tamara hesitated. She’d never tried anything of this nature before. An exorcism! “Maybe you need a priest or—”

“No,” he interrupted. “A priest would not work. Religion will not help. Only magick.”

She shook her head, suddenly frightened. “But I don’t know how! I’ve never studied anything like this. I have always concentrated on hiding what I am, not learning more about it.”

“If you cannot destroy Set, you must kill me,” he said simply, the flicker of hope dying from his eyes. “I cannot hold him off much longer, he will kill Ramose, and it will be my fault.” He laid his cheek against her hair, holding her tight, swaying again to the music, holding her as if she were his lifeline.

“Please, when you do, please be quick about it. I would really rather not suffer.”

She nodded, unable to speak. Tears streamed down her cheeks. Here, in this lovely garden, he was asking her to end his life, to end the millennia of pain. Her heart rebelled, even as her mind knew what she had to do.

There had to be a way to save him. Maybe Julie had some ideas. If only Julie wasn’t hurt, together she knew they could pull this off. But her cousin, despite the Petiri healing sessions, was still bedridden.

“I can help you, I’m sure of it,” she said with more confidence than she felt. God, she hoped she could meet this promise. “Hang on, don’t give up. Fight him at every turn, and I will find a way to rid you of Set.”

Relief passed over his face, and she swallowed the guilt, praying she wasn’t giving him false hope. She had to find a way, for Ramose.

He hugged her tightly and kissed her cheek before releasing her. “Yes, Ramose is a lucky man indeed.”

“Why is it you haven’t brought Ramose into your mind like this? You’re just dream walking, aren’t you?”

“Yes, I am a dream walker as you call it, but he fights me. He is unable to separate the evil within from the man I was.” He dragged a hand through his long hair. “I have only been successful one other time, with one other person, and I am afraid I caused the poor woman fear.”

Curious, she had to ask. “Who was she?”