Waiting for Mercy (Cambions) (13 page)

Exhausted couldn’t express how I felt after a sleepless night.  My SAT word of the day somnolent was fitting. The end of the school day wouldn’t come soon enough.  Thank God it’s Friday, I thought bitterly walking out of the lunch line with my limp slice of pizza.  In slow motion, I watched as Maggie and Amber ambushed me yet again.  Annoyed, I hoped this wasn’t becoming a habit that I would need to break.  They corralled me in the direction in the far corner of the lunch room opposite the elite table.

“We need a favor,” Maggie said. I narrowed my eyes at her. That word ‘we’ used to mean she and I, but she meant her and Amber.  I tried to keep the pleasant look on my face.  I missed it just being the two of us.  We hadn’t hung out alone together that much lately.  She had to split her time between Brent and us. Amber lived closer to her than I did.  Now they rode to school together.  I really tried not to be jealous about that.  Amber nodded at Maggie in silent communication. I wondered what was going on and clearly I was the last to know.  My tired brain hadn’t kicked in yet, so I was at a total loss for the conversation to come.

“Amber took a test because she was late,” Maggie blurted out.

My brain was slow on the uptake.  I narrowed my eyes confused.  “So why would she have to take a test for being late. I thought you just got detention for that?”

Maggie shook her head and for the first time I saw the pained look on Amber’s pretty face.  Even somber she was a really pretty girl and I understood just what Paul saw in her.

“She missed her period,” Maggie said leaning into me with a whisper of words.

Still I was completely not getting this. Later, I would blame my ignorance on lack of sleep. “So she wasn’t late, she skipped a class and they made her take a test?” I asked quizzically.

Maggie put her hands to her head in exasperation. Amber scooted over to me and whispered in my ear, “My period is late, “she said slowly.

It took Amber to say it just that way for me to understand.  Maybe because things like this didn’t happen at our school.  Or at least I’d never heard of it.  So I just wasn’t thinking in those terms. 

Wide eyed, I looked at both of them as the dawn of realization cleared my foggy brain.  That kind of late and test and period, I thought. Geez, what was a person to say.  Thankfully, I didn’t have to speak because Maggie broke down the master plan.

That plan unluckily centered on me.  As I made the journey towards the table I’d avoided for weeks until yesterday’s debacle, I wondered why I had agreed to this.  This wasn’t right.  This wasn’t my problem.  But the best friend rule had come up and I didn’t know when Amber became a part of my circle of best friends.  Paul and Maggie had been my best friends.  Amber had been my best friend Paul’s girlfriend.  In fact if anyone could claim the best friend rule, it should have been Paul.  The rules of best friends meant you would do anything for that person.  I loved Paul and I’d thought to make him happy I should have been with him.  That was one of the reasons I’d gone last night.

Maybe if I’d told the pair of conspirators that I’d been with Paul last night doing a tongue dance, I wouldn’t be in the position I was in now.  But then, I would be friendless. So I’d kept my mouth shut on that bit of information and found myself walking the walk of shame back to the elite table.  I would have to confess my sins to Maggie and Amber soon.  The truth was bound to come to light.  It always did.

Each step brought memories back to the look on Paul’s face when he’d seen Flynn kiss me.  It had been one of defeat.  But Paul fled and I had been unable to explain until last night that actually Flynn kissed me and I hadn’t kissed him back.  Honestly, I wasn’t sure Luke knew this or maybe they might not be best friends.  God, everything was such a mess. 

But I wouldn’t hurt Luke anymore than I had to, so I would take that secret to the grave and somehow I didn’t think Flynn would tell.  But in the end, I couldn’t be with Paul.  I still didn’t think he really wanted me other than for no one else to have me. I’d been pining after him long after I nearly killed him with my succubus kiss.  He’d survived and accepted me despite my demon half and I’d loved him for it. 

That love wasn’t enough though.  My love for Luke was far different and all encompassing.  I’d felt that last night when the lack of fireworks clued me in.  It had been nice to be in Paul’s arms, but he wasn’t Luke.  Words just couldn’t explain how my heart did flip flops when I looked at Luke which is why I had avoided him.  But now I was to go to the table where he sat at with Flynn and Paul.  Then I had to get Paul to come somewhere private where I would give him the good news he was to be a father.  I wanted to slap him for it.  I wished the two musketeers had mentioned this yesterday and I wouldn’t have gone to dinner.  But first I would have to survive not making any eye contact with Luke.

The primary hurdle was to endure the long walk to the table.  There were hidden dangers in that walk.  I was wearing yet another mini skirt and ballet flat instead of my usual jeans and chucks. If I slipped and fell I would go up in the air and down hard and most likely expose the family jewels hidden only by a swatch of cloth they sold as underwear.  I wasn’t afraid of the shoes making me fall but rather anything messy my peers spilled from their trays as they walked.  I held a lunch tray and couldn’t see where I stepped.

As I neared the table, Paul, who was facing me, looked up from where he sat in front of Luke and Flynn.  Paul didn’t always eat lunch with us.  He’d stopped when he and Amber started dating and even though they were currently broken up for the umpteenth time, I hadn’t seen him around much.  Who knew where he went, but with this debacle I could only imagine what he’d been doing.  He did say he and Amber only had one thing in common.

I saw the movement and closed my eyes before I thought better of it.  I reopened them to find something on the ceiling that was entertaining.  But that couldn’t work because I might run into someone and that would be just as disastrous.  I bet I looked silly because it would have been obvious that I was avoiding their stare.  But when I looked back both Luke and Flynn were turned with their backs to me again.  I exhaled a long breath and moved to the end of the table to walk around so I could whisper to Paul.  Nina and Amanda were at the table too along with Brent, Jay, and Kathy.  I faintly wondered then why Maggie wasn’t sitting with Brent.  I hadn’t even bothered to ask her what happened last night.  Crap, but they’d roped me in and I’d just forgotten.  If I made it through this little excursion, I would pull her aside straight away.

My eyes found a friendly face in Jay.  Okay, so Flynn was considered the hottest guy in school with Sebastian nearly dethroning him.  I still gave Flynn the edge, but I would never tell him. His ego was big enough.  But truthfully Jay was probably the best looking guy in school by far.  But he was so far off limits I just didn’t consider him along with the rest of the school population.  He was a blond beauty that rivaled actors like Alex Pettyfer.  Kathy, his girlfriend, was no slouch either. The best way to describe Kathy was a Megan Fox look alike with dark hair and that was all that needed to be said.

I was so avoiding Luke’s gaze I inadvertently stared at Jay. “Hey,” he said with a voice that dipped in honey.

“Hey Jay,” I said. Then I quickly looked at Kathy. “Hey, Kathy,” I added.  Her frown which was probably because of my apparent ogle at her boyfriend turned to a slight smile.  My faux pas reddened my cheeks before I turned to meet Paul’s gaze when I reached him.  The table’s occupants quieted to a dull roar.  I knew everyone wondered just what I was up to.

I leaned down not realizing at that instant just what a view I was giving Flynn and Luke and any other guy glancing my way until Paul turned and his eyes never meeting mine.  I sighed and sat down next to him.  Turned backwards on the bench, my back was to Luke. “I need to talk to you,” I said softly to Paul.

Maybe it was because I had briefly flashed him, but Paul looked befuddled and nodded a little too vigorously.  I stood leading the way to the outside door without waiting for him to follow.  The courtyard was void of my classmates because it was really too cold to be out here.  But this was our best chance to have privacy without people assuming the worst about what we were about to do.  However, before I’d cleared the elite table I’d made the mistake trying to be careful of my step and glanced at Flynn.  He smirked and when I rolled my eyes away they fell upon Luke next.  He looked at me with an unreadable expression.  One thing was for sure he wasn’t smiling.  He looked almost sad.  I looked away.  I hadn’t wanted to see that.  It broke my heart.

I walked out the cafeteria doors and a blast of cold air hit my face turning my cheeks pink with chill.  Goose bumps began to erupt all over my body.  A part of me wanted to turn back into the warmth of the cafeteria.  But this was the only place where we would find true privacy in full view of the school population. Hence no rumors could be started about a calm conversation between us or at least I hoped.

Sitting at the first table I got to, I put my tray down thinking my fingers would most likely be numb after this.  But I bit into my sandwich before it was too cold to eat while Paul finally made his way to me.  My sandwich was a turkey sub with melted cheese.  I didn’t think I would be able to enjoy this for long.  Paul straddled the picnic table in front of me wide eyed in anticipation of whatever it was I needed to say.  I made him stew and wait while I tried to enjoy some of my lunch.  After a few more bites, I’d decided what I was going to say. First I would try not to be angry.  But I didn’t think that would last long.  I was amazingly pissed.  I swallowed and shifted in my seat dismayed for being forced into this situation, disheartened that Paul had been careless, disenfranchised that I was the bearer of the news.  “Amber’s pregnant,” I said thrusting the words at him and waited for his reaction.

His near gleam faded to all gloom.  I wasn’t certain what he’d been so happy about.  Last night I’d left things open.  I didn’t want to tell him I didn’t think it would work after he’d gone through so much trouble for my birthday gift.  And kissing him had been nice.  So I’d told him I wasn’t ready to be with anyone just yet.  He’d asked me about Luke and I told him that I doubted we’d get back together.  But our fate was sealed now.  He was most likely going to be a father and I wouldn’t stand in the way.

“What?” he said dumbfounded.  My eyes refocused on his.  I’d been staring into space with my own introspection.

His word however registered.  I felt my anger rise.  Why were boys stupid?  Why was my Paul so stupid?  “You and Amber had unprotected sex and she thinks she may be pregnant,” I said crisply. 

He looked up and down as if he’d lost something before he turned back to me with his mouth agape. “Shit,” he said hissing.  His hand was in his hair pushing it back with the force of his understanding.

That word was exactly what I wanted to say when I’d been told.  There was more I wanted to say but didn’t.  Instead, I stuck to the facts not wanting to complicate matters.  My confused feelings for him were no longer important.  “Look, she wants you to take her to the clinic to do a blood test to be sure,” I said.

He opened his mouth to speak but I shut it with my next words. “Please don’t say the stupid words like is she sure or is it mine,” I said.  My voice was cold and may have added frost to the fog of breath that escaped my mouth while I spoke. I wasn’t really hungry anymore.  I looked down at my sandwich.  It now looked like the brick it was.  The fire of nervousness left my body since the deed was done.  I shivered against the low temperatures because my coat was in my locker.

Paul moved closer to me to share body heat.  When he put his arms around me and leaned his head against the side of mine, I let him.  Once upon a time we’d been best friends.  That was our comfort zone.  So I gave him my friendship back.  Even though I should berate him, he needed understanding too.  He wasn’t the first teenage guy to make this age old mistake.

He took my hands and rubbed them in between his. “When,” he asked.

That was an easy question and one I wasn’t terribly mad at him for. “You need to talk to her,” I said sharply.  I guess all my irritation hadn’t left me yet.

“Then why isn’t she telling me?” he asked in annoyance.

Quickly, I said, “Maybe because you avoid her like you did me.”

“You know I hate confrontation,” he said in a confrontational tone.  I almost laughed at that one.

Not thinking I said, “That’s just the coward in you.”

“That’s not fair,” he said.

He was not getting out of this easily. “You were sleeping with her and you broke up with her. What kind of guy are you?” I asked.

“Lots of people have sex, Mercy,” he said. “You don’t stay with someone because of that.”

“Apparently, I didn’t get that memo. I was under the impression that was something you did when you loved someone.  I didn’t think you were Flynn’s protégé.”