Wanting Reed (Break Me) BOOK 2 (36 page)

I stopped calling and texting her altogether. Talk about fucking impossible, but after what she saw, I think she needs a break from seeing me with other women, particularly Sierra. Thank goodness Sierra won’t be a problem anymore since I deleted her number and told her to delete mine.

I don’t expect any calls from Elle either, even though I’m hanging onto the idea that she might. Regardless what I do, I always stumble. When I reach out for her, I’m always pushed away. I wish my luck would change. I’d do just about anything for her, but each time I run toward her it seems like I’m not any closer to her. All I can do it wait.

Running. That’s what I’m doing right now. I relish the cold October air cutting into my skin as the sun breaks out from behind the clouds. The park is busy today with kids playing soccer and some guys playing touch football on another field. I finish my last lap and make my way to watch them play for a few minutes when one of the guys starts chatting with me.

“Man down. Can you play?” he asks, taking a sip of water from a jug.

I look over and smile. “I think I can help with that.”

“Cool.”

I spend the rest of the afternoon taking some hits and catching some passes before I head back to my empty apartment. I exchanged numbers with a couple of guys to come out and play whenever they need an extra man which is good because I have some spare time on my hands. Getting some additional practice time can only help me when tryouts come around. I find myself drifting in the direction of Elle’s mom’s house when I leave the track. I have to stop this shit. If anyone sees me, they will probably call the neighborhood watch. I could always walk by the center. It’s on the way, unlike her house, which is completely out of my way. Maybe I’ll get lucky and catch a glimpse of her.

I throw up my hoodie as the wind starts to pick up and the sun falls in the sky. I don’t even notice someone walking next to me until we stop at the corner and wait for the light to signal us across.

“You lost?”

I cringe, recognizing the voice and shift my eyes to the right. It’s my best buddy Jace. “Shit, I was just thinking about how much I missed you.” I chuckle.

“Yeah? Ain’t that some shit.” He smiles like he’s got some big surprise for me. All I’m thinking is maybe he’s on his way to Elle’s place, and I could follow him there. “I just left my sister’s apartment, and she said she missed me, too.”

Fuck. There goes my plan.
If I want everything to go well Friday, I need to behave around Jace. I abruptly change my tone.

“How is Elle?” I ask, thinking maybe he hasn’t caught wind of the shitstorm with Sierra the other night. He glances my way and gives me a look.

“She’s having a bad day, but you wouldn’t know anything about that, now would you?”

I sense a little sarcasm, so maybe he does know. “Shit, Jace, you were right about the Sierra thing. I totally shouldn’t have trusted her, and in the end, she stabbed me in the back.”

I don’t care if he thinks it’s the funniest thing he’s heard because right now I feel like the biggest idiot for not listening to the stupid prick. What was I supposed to do at the time? He was ready to kick my ass. The last thing I thought he would do was warn me about Sierra in an attempt to help me.

As Jace starts walking away, he turns around and says, “Well, I can’t say I didn’t warn you, but it seems that you weren’t the only one getting the shit end of the stick that night. See ya around, lover boy!”

Huh? What the fuck did he mean by that? I think nothing of it, or maybe I should since what he said about Sierra was actually true. Fuck. I hate when people talk in riddles.

I skip the Peeping Tom bit and head home. If I were to see her, it would just make it harder for me to walk back to my apartment alone. Instead, I stop by the liquor store and grab a case of beer and watch fucking Red Sox nation go crazy on TV.

The rest of the week is filled with the same old shit— work, classes, the gym and working out with the team. This routine is getting old quick. It would not be so bad if I had someone to break up the time. I’ve been taking way too many showers. Luke is giving me hell about it and bought me a few bottles of lotion as a joke. I am seriously thinking my roomie should actually consider stand-up comedy instead of whatever the fuck he does for a living. I should ask him one of these days, but I’m scared to find out.

No calls or texts from Elle all week. I’m not surprised.

It’s Thursday night. Exactly twenty-four hours before the plan is put in motion. I finish cooking myself dinner and watch an episode of
Sons of Anarchy
after my sister mentioned it to me on the phone. I don’t pay much attention. It’s just white noise, a constant humming in my ear. I’d rather stare at the clock on the wall and watch the minutes slip by. The next few hours are going to kill me, so I head to my bedroom and pull out my guitar. Maybe playing will make the time go by faster. Plus, I want to practice the new song I wrote. It’s almost done. I just need a couple of tweaks here and there and it should be ready. Perhaps someday I’ll get to play it for Elle.

It’s Sunday night. I got no studying done and no running. I couldn’t make it to dinner, so Jace brought over some leftovers. I spend the rest of the afternoon watching football with him. I can’t remember the last time I vegged out in front of the TV like this. It feels good to do it with my brother who doesn’t mind running back and forth between the kitchen and the living room to get whatever I want. I like it and take advantage of it for as long as I can.

“Okay, I think you’ve abused me enough today.” Jace laughs, throwing himself on the couch. “What’s up with you, anyways? Mom was about to get in the car with me, but I told her that you’re a big girl.”

“Thanks for that. I don’t think I’m up for a tag team interrogation.” I smile, reaching out to pat his knee. “And to answer your question, I’m just a little tired.” I yawn, pulling the blanket up around my shoulders.

“Does it have anything to do with Tyler’s birthday and a lot of alcohol?”

I don’t answer for a minute. I’m emotionally drained but at the same time relieved that I told Tyler, but now what do I do? Call Reed? No, that won’t happen. Not yet. I can’t. I need everything to sink in, and it’s not just going to take a weekend for it to happen.

“What’s going on? You’ve never been like this. Alcohol or not.” He grimaces and sits up.

Geez, am I that obvious?
I sit up on the couch, feeling the rush of nausea instantly hit me as I glance wistfully at my brother.

“Did you and Tyler get into a fight or something?” he asks, turning his attention away from, of course, a Cowboys game.
BAM! Reed.
I flip the channel and return his stare.

“I wish I weren’t so easy to read.” I pull my knees up under my chin.

“Shit, nineteen years as your brother. Seriously?” He laughs, running his fingers through his shaggy brown hair. Just to change the subject, I want to ask him about Brooke, but I know that won’t work with him. He’s always been secretive when it comes to his love life. “You and Tyler hitting a rough patch?”

“Huh?” I look at him in surprise.

“You guys were a thing, right? I mean, with all the time you spend together. I thought you guys finally took the next step.”

I focus on the commercials on TV about some crazy Halloween nonsense to drown out and avoid my brother’s question. Moments later, Jace is snapping his fingers in front of my face and saying my name and something about a space cadet. I reluctantly return to reality and smile wearily at him.

“Tyler and I were on two different paths. He wanted more in our relationship than I was able to offer him,” I relent, hugging my knees to my chest.

“Why was that such an issue? You two have been best friends since who knows when, and I always thought it was only a matter of time before you hooked up,” he reasons.

“Yeah…well, we tried, but something kind of got in the way recently.” My voice is steady and controlled, despite the unease consuming me about this particular subject Jace chose to discuss.

It seems Reed has thrown a rather enormous wrench into my plans. That’s all he’s done since entering my life. He’s flipped it completely upside down, but at this moment, it feels right. I just need to get a handle on my emotions before we can work things out.

“Oh shit, Elle,” Jace replies, leaning back on the couch. “Please don’t say what I think you’re about to say.”

“It’s obvious you don’t like Reed,” I counter.

“Yeah,” he groans. “He’s a douche.”

“I’m sorry, Jace, but the truth is I’m still in love with Reed, and it’s not fair to drag Tyler into all of this.”

“I realize you had a thing with Reed before, but I’ve seen him around and talked to him recently. I know he was fucking hanging around Sierra and I didn’t say anything to you, but is it wise to throw away a possible happy future with Tyler?” He leans forward, lacing his fingers together and knitting his eyebrows inquisitively.

“Okay, stop,” I reply coolly, dropping my knees from my chin. I’m annoyed that Jace didn’t come to me, knowing Reed was here. It’s water under the bridge now, and I don’t have the energy to get into an argument with him over it. I already had it out with Tyler for not being up front with me. “I hear your concern, and I know all about the Sierra thing, trust me, but this is my life. I need to talk to Reed when I’m ready. I want to hear him out and decide if what I’m feeling is love or if we were just a fling. I need you to support my decision and not assume Reed is at fault on all costs.” I inhale, thinking about when and where this will happen with Reed and what the end result will be.

“You know what, Sis?” He gazes at me thoughtfully. “I’m glad you can talk about it with me. The only difficult part about this whole thing for me would be being nice to the dude. I kind of like giving him shit all the time. It won’t be the same anymore.” He switches the channel back to the game.

“You’re a fucking piece of work.” I laugh, slapping his thigh. “All this talk about me is getting boring. I’ve been meaning to ask you about Brooke. How is that going?” I wink, wiggling my eyebrows.

He glances over at the TV. “Off limits, Sis,” he answers, focusing on the game. “Hey, look the Cowboys are ready to score.” He’s trying to deflect attention away from himself, so he doesn’t have to talk about his seemingly active love life.

“One of these days, Jace, you’re gonna need some advice from me about women, and I might not be so eager to give it to you.”

“I doubt it.” He winks. “You love me too much.”

It’s finally Friday. Piper’s plans for tonight involve the House of Blues. This is one of the premium venues for bands to play, and the fact that Crimzen is performing there is beyond awesome. I can tell as soon as Piper walks in the door how excited she is and how different it is than playing at the Middle East. For all intents and purposes, this gig tonight can really put Crimzen on the map. I really wish that for them, and I’m glad that Piper invited me, along with Evelyn and Mindy.

“Cab should be here in fifteen minutes!” Mindy yells, looking out the window of my apartment.

“Let’s do this!” Evelyn quips, downing her third shot.

“Jesus, Evelyn, save some for the rest of us.”

“I’m good. Don’t you worry,” she exclaims as she adjusts her skirt and props up her boobs. “I get to see my man tonight, all fucking six feet of him. Long black hair and fucking amazing, green eyes. You know he already has a nickname for me? Evie. He fucking calls me Evie. I fucking love him,” she breathes, getting this crazy dazed look in her eye.

Piper giggles as she walks out of the bathroom. “I think someone needs another shot to loosen up.”

“I want to enjoy the band and being shitfaced will not help with that.” I frown, placing my hand over my empty shot glass.

“Get rid of your hand,” she gestures, tapping my hand with her freshly manicured nails. “We can play quarters, or I’m going to tie you up to a chair and shove a funnel in your mouth. It’s your pick.” She grins wickedly. “Remember how that turned out for you?”

“Fine.” I shake my head in amusement at Piper’s attempts to get me drunk.