Werewolf in Alaska: A Wild About You Novel (17 page)

She turned her head and kissed his hair. “I heard you say something right at the end, about the time you were coming.”

“Probably
glory hallelujah
.”

“No, it sounded more like
Rachel sex
.”

“Don’t know. Might’ve said that.”

“I think you did.” She kissed his hair again. “Yes, I think that’s what you said.”

He decided not to confirm or deny. But apparently in the frenzy of making love to her, he’d managed to confess his true feelings. He no longer cared about the difference between human and Were sex.

The only female he wanted, Were or human, was Rachel. That had been true even before they’d consummated this love affair, but now it was indelibly burned into his psyche. That could be a problem someday in the future when he had to choose a mate, but he couldn’t change what had happened.

“Jake sex is the best, too,” she said softly. “Just so you know.”

“I shouldn’t be so damned happy to hear that.” His earlier thoughts about causing her pain drifted back to him. He tried to push them away, but they were persistent devils. “I should want this experience to be just okay, so you can leave me and quickly find someone who’s ten times better at pleasing you.”

“You should, but you don’t.” It was a statement, not a question. She continued to stroke his back.

“That’s right. What I’d really like is for you to have no more lovers after me, but that’s completely unrealistic, so I’ll settle for them being less competent than I am.”

“I think it’s good that you’re admitting this,” she said. “We should always tell each other the truth.”

“The truth isn’t very pretty. Now you know that I’m a selfish bastard who doesn’t want another male getting top billing, even if that means you end up with less pleasure in your life as a result. I’m not proud of that.”

She ran her fingers down his backbone. “Why do you suppose I kept pestering you about werewolf versus human sex? I know once you leave me you’ll mate with a werewolf. I don’t want you to have more fun with her than you’ve had with me. So I’m selfish, too.”

He chuckled. “What a fine mess we made for ourselves, huh?”

“I suppose so, but I’m not sorry.”

“I’m not, either.”

“You’re sure?” Her question had a slightly uneasy lilt to it.

“Yep.”

She let out her breath in a whoosh. “That’s a relief, Jake. I was afraid you might be sorry, considering how getting tangled up with me goes against your beliefs.”

“I don’t regret a single second I’ve shared with you. Well, maybe the agony of having you clean my wounds, but even that had its moments.”

“See, that would never happen now. If you hurt yourself, I’d let you handle it.” She fell silent as she continued her lazy caress. “So how many humans are mated with werewolves?”

“Only a handful so far. Why?”

“Just curious.” Her hand grew still. “How has that changed their lives, exactly?”

Jake recognized a leading question when he heard one. He lifted his head to look into her eyes. “It’s changed their lives drastically, Rachel.”

“In what way? I mean, werewolves live as humans a good part of the time, so aside from having your mate shift and go for a run in the woods now and then, what’s so different about living with a werewolf?”

“Everything.” He eased away from her and climbed out of bed. “Let’s take that hike we planned. It’s time you watched me shift.”

“Good. I want to do that.” She scooted off the bed. “I think it’ll be cool.”

“It may not be quite what you think.”

“I’ve seen
Ladyhawke
. I’m sure I’ll be fine, Jake. You’re not going to shock me, if that’s what you’re afraid of.”

“I haven’t seen that movie, but Hollywood’s version of shape-shifting usually isn’t anything like the real event. I’m just warning you that it might be a little . . . unnerving.”

“I doubt it.”

“Okay.” But he sincerely hoped it would unnerve her. Her line of questioning certainly was unnerving
him.
He didn’t have to be a genius to figure out where those questions were coming from.

After fun and games with the human version of Jake Hunter, she’d begun to convince herself that maybe he wasn’t that different from any human she might hang out with. Perhaps hooking up with him wouldn’t have to change her life very much, after all. She was building castles in the air. Time to bring her down to earth.

After freshening up and putting on clean clothes, Rachel was in a jubilant mood as she and Jake left her cabin. Jake had appropriated her backpack to carry a couple of stainless steel water bottles, a bag of trail mix she happened to have on hand, and his cell phone.

He’d turned the phone off with a comment about hating the sound of a phone in the wilderness. But he admitted they were helpful in an emergency. Anyone watching the two of them setting off down the trail would assume they were simply day hikers out to enjoy an Alaskan summer day.

Not quite. By the time they returned to her cabin, she would have seen something few humans had. She suspected that Jake wanted to scare her a little with this shifting business. Maybe it was a test, and if so, she intended to pass it with flying colors.

The more time she spent with Jake, the less ridiculous she found the idea of mating with a werewolf. She was an artist who lived an unconventional life. She spent long hours in an isolated workshop, so logically she’d be a better candidate for an alternate lifestyle than a corporate type.

Lionel’s presence in her life could present a challenge, but she might be able to get around that. Other humans had done it. She’d read enough of Duncan MacDowell’s book to believe that Were-human pairings weren’t the unmitigated disaster that Jake insisted they were.

She’d love to be able to talk with one of those humans, but she couldn’t do that. She wasn’t supposed to know what she knew, so that kept her trapped in silence. Jake was her only source of information, and his view was biased.

And yet, as they set out on the narrow trail he’d chosen, Jake in the lead, she wondered if his views were as rigid as they had been a few days ago. They’d had some really hot sex, and some cozy shared moments of friendship. He seemed as crazy about her as she was about him. If she was willing to consider the possibility of this mating business, then perhaps Jake could be swayed.

First, though, she had to show him that his shifting demonstration wouldn’t freak her out. She was slightly apprehensive—anyone would be—but this was Jake. She’d keep that in mind during the transformation and all would be well.

They arrived at a fork in the trail, and Jake turned back to her. “I was planning to take the left fork, but I just remembered that you sent Lionel out searching for wood.”

“I did. Sorry about that. I was only thinking about giving him a job so he could both earn his regular wage and get out of our hair.”

“Yeah, I know. But I’d hate like hell to run into him.” Jake adjusted his sunglasses, which made him look seriously hot, and glanced through the trees. “Do you have any idea which way he might have gone?”

“No.” Then she had an inspiration. “But surely he’ll want to stay close to his truck so he won’t have far to carry the pieces.”

Jake’s smile flashed. “An obvious point I completely missed. He’s nineteen. He’ll want to conserve energy. If we hike a good distance down the trail, either trail, we’ll be far beyond where he’d go.”

“I’m sure we will.” She was dazzled by how gorgeous he was. The dappled shade lovingly caressed his broad shoulders, and his worn jeans seemed custom-made for his lean hips and tight buns. Now that she’d sampled the rugged beauty of a werewolf in human form, she couldn’t imagine being satisfied with anything less. Jake would simply have to see things her way.

“Then we’re off. Let me know if I’m going too fast for you.”

“I’m fine.” She blessed the long legs she’d inherited from her mother’s side of the family. Although she couldn’t match Jake for sheer athleticism, she could keep up if he didn’t go any faster than this.

If she hoped to snag herself a werewolf, she’d have to demonstrate some stamina. Once again she wondered if the other humans tried to keep up with their more physically gifted mates or if they’d reached an understanding about human limits. If there wasn’t a support group for human mates of werewolves, there should be.

She chuckled to herself. If Jake could read her mind right now, he’d have a stroke. But if he imagined that he had total control of what would happen between them, he had a lot to learn about her.

“What’s so funny back there?”

She’d just suggested that they should always tell each other the truth. Time to put up or shut up on that score. “I was wondering if there was a support group for human mates of werewolves.”

He came to such an abrupt halt that she almost ran into him. His shoulders rose and fell with his deep inhale and exhale before he turned to face her. With his sunglasses and forbidding expression, he looked like a cop about to hand out a ticket. “That’s not the solution we’re going to choose for this problem. If you’re thinking in that direction, then you—”

“Need to think again.” She laid a finger against his perfectly sculpted lips. “But isn’t the point of brainstorming solutions to consider all the possibilities?”

He wrapped her hand in both of his and eased it away from his mouth. “That isn’t a possibility.”

“Why not?” She couldn’t see his green eyes behind the sunglasses and she thought he might have worn them on purpose as a shield. In the shade of the fragrant evergreens, he didn’t really need them, which was why she’d left hers at home. “Don’t you want me?”

His jaw tightened. “That’s not fair. You know I do.”

“Then take me. Make me your mate. It’s not like we’d be the first to do that.”

“I don’t care if a hundred Weres have taken human mates. It’s still a huge mistake, and I won’t contribute to the chaos it causes.”

“What chaos? Duncan says the pairs that are already mated are living in harmony with their Were families. Someone named Emma is mated with a werewolf named Aidan, and—”

“Yes, and they’ve already had a baby born of that mating, but no one can predict if the kid will be Were or human. Her parents won’t know, and
she
won’t know until she reaches puberty. Can you imagine the stress of that on a family? On a young female?”

“I suppose it would be unsettling not to know until it happens, or it doesn’t.” She wondered which the child would wish for. Would she want to turn out like mom or dad?

“That’s my point. Emma and Aidan have chosen that stress for themselves, which is one thing, but they’ve also chosen it for a baby who has to live with that choice, like it or not. I won’t do that.”

Rachel wasn’t ready to give up that easily. “Why did they make that decision to deal with the stress, do you suppose?”

“They claim to be soul mates who belong with each other.” Jake’s voice faltered for the first time. “I can’t . . . I don’t really believe that’s true.”

“Why couldn’t it be true? And if it is, their child has the benefit of two parents who are devoted to each other. That’s huge, probably more important to the kid’s well-being than the Were-human dilemma.”

“That’s a judgment call.”

“One I’m prepared to make. Damn it, Jake, I wish you’d take off your sunglasses so I can see your eyes. This is an important conversation we’re having, and you’re hiding.”

“All
right
.” He pulled off his glasses and gazed at her with a troubled expression. “I’m upset, okay? Happy now?”

“Jake.” She put a soothing hand on his arm.

He stepped back. “Sorry, but I can’t think straight when you’re touching me.”

“Doesn’t that tell you anything?”

“Who knows? Do you think I haven’t wondered if this is some cosmic joke that the first female I have a real connection with happens to be human?”

He was beginning to tick her off with his one-note rant. “How about a cosmic gift? How about that positive interpretation, instead? How about we rejoice in the miracle of finding each other and figure out how we can be together?”

“And you’re so sure you’re ready for that?”

“I think I am, yes.”

“Let’s find out, shall we?” He shrugged out of the backpack and dropped it to the ground. Then he started stripping off his clothes with angry, jerky movements. “Let’s find out how you react to watching a man change into a wolf right in front of your eyes.”

Rachel glanced around, her heart pounding. “Jake, we haven’t gone very far down the path. Maybe we should hike a ways more before you do this.”

“Nervous, Rachel?”

“Not for myself. For you. I think we should be in a more remote area.” Truthfully, though, he was scaring her with his abrupt decision to shift with no time for her to mentally prepare for it. She’d imagined he’d seek out a secluded glen and the process would be slow and ethereal.

She’d envisioned his shifting as a magical experience. Logically, she knew there wouldn’t be music, but she thought there should be. Like in
Ladyhawke
.
But this wasn’t Hollywood, as he’d warned her earlier.

Definitely not Hollywood. Jake tossed his clothes to the side of the trail and stretched out naked in the middle of the dirt. She winced. At the very least he should have had grass or pine boughs. Something other than dirt.

But if dirt was his choice, she would get down to his level and watch this up close and personal. She sat down on the trail beside him. This position had an added benefit. If the shock caused her to faint, she wouldn’t have so far to fall.

She hadn’t picked a very good spot. A sharp rock was digging into her fanny. She was about to move when Jake took a deep breath and began to glow. Mesmerized, she went completely still.

The effect was muted by daylight and would have been more pronounced at night, but Jake was definitely giving off a pulsing light. And his body, the one she’d enjoyed so thoroughly in the past few hours, the one she’d stroked and kissed, had begun to change.

Heart pounding and stomach clenched, she made herself watch without looking away. But several times she wanted to avert her eyes from this strangely beautiful, yet completely bizarre, process. No, this wasn’t
Ladyhawke
.

That Hollywood transformation had taken place with shifting light. And evocative music, of course. But this was more like a carnival show’s house-of-mirrors trick, as Jake’s body stretched and realigned to accommodate the very different form of a wolf. He grew increasingly hairy and his face gradually elongated into that of a beast. When he was no longer recognizably human, Rachel sucked in a breath.

She
was
shocked by the change, and embarrassed by her visceral reaction, which contained equal doses of fascination and horror. She hoped Jake hadn’t heard her gasp, but he probably had. He’d already told her of a wolf’s acute sensory perception.

The shift seemed to take forever, although in reality it might have been only a couple of minutes. They were highly charged minutes, though, and Rachel held her breath through most of it. No wonder Jake had insisted that she had to watch this.

Until now, she’d been living in a fantasy world in which Jake had presented himself as either a wolf or a human. The metamorphosis from one to the other hadn’t factored into her view of him. But any human who planned to enter the Were world had better accept this process. And now that she’d seen it, she realized she wasn’t even close to acceptance.

At long last, a large black wolf lay on the path where Jake had been before. Rachel drew breath into her burning lungs and stared at the animal as she tried to convince herself that it was still Jake. She had a tough time making the mental adjustment.

The wolf’s flanks heaved, and then he rose slowly to his feet. After an initial period of unsteadiness, his massive chest inflated and he lifted his broad head and turned it in Rachel’s direction. Jake’s green eyes, their shape altered but their color identical, stared at her. They were almost nose to nose.

Then, as clear as a bell, a mental transmission arrived.
Well?

She answered without thinking. “You were right. I wasn’t prepared for that.” Then she realized that he’d communicated through telepathy. Could she do the same?
But I didn’t faint. Give me credit for that, at least.

At least you wouldn’t have had far to fall.

Part of my plan.
She gazed into his wolf’s eyes.
Jake, we’re talking without speaking.

He blinked at her.
So it seems.

Can other humans do that with a werewolf?

Never heard of it happening before.

Her smile was triumphant.
See? How can you deny that we’re destined to be together?

You make it sound like such a simple . . .
Jake’s ears flicked and his gaze left hers. His body tensed and he growled.

For one wild moment she wondered if the growl was meant for her. No, something else . . .

“Miss M!” Lionel’s panicked cry came from somewhere behind her.

Dear God.
“Lionel, stay back!” Light-headed with fear for Jake, she scrambled to her feet and spun in Lionel’s direction. “It’s okay! Stay back!”

“Don’t move!” Lionel’s shouted command was followed by the crack of a rifle and a sharp yelp of pain.

Jake!
Gulping in terror, she turned back to the spot where he’d been. Empty. When she scanned the trees, she saw nothing. Her shoulders sagged. He got away, but he was wounded. And it was her fault.

She spied his pile of clothes and kicked them under an overhanging bush as Lionel came crashing through the forest toward her.

“Damn it! Just nicked him!” Rifle in hand, Lionel arrived panting. “Did he bite you? Are you bleeding?”

No, but Jake might be. She fought to stay focused. Jake needed her to be calm, to take charge, to protect him if she could. “He wasn’t attacking me.”

“Not yet, maybe, but he had you down, and next he would have gone for your throat! Thank God I showed up. Where the hell is Mr. Hunter?”

“He, uh, had something he had to do, so I . . . decided to take a hike by myself.” She grabbed the backpack before Lionel thought to do it. He might catch a glimpse of Jake’s clothes hidden under the bush if he inspected the ground too carefully.

“So he left you to amuse yourself, and then you get attacked by his wolf, which was supposed to be on its way to a sanctuary? Mr. Hunter is not taking very good care of you, Miss M!”

She thought quickly about how to explain the sudden appearance of the black wolf. Lionel wouldn’t believe he’d seen a different one just now. Jake was too distinctive. “Maybe the wolf escaped while he was being transported to the sanctuary.”