What a Boy Needs (5 page)

They toss me outside
,
whoever else helped him
,
heading back into the house and leaving only Sebastian and me on the porch.

"
Fuck!
"
I don
'
t remember ever being this pissed before.
"
Why
'
d you do that? You should have
helped
me!
"

"
Helped you what? Get the cops called on us? Upset Pris even more? Damn
,
Jay. You think I don
'
t want to beat his ass just as bad as you do?
"

"
Ugh.
"
I groan
,
reaching for my hat before realizing I must have lost it. I
'
m
losing more than just that.

I wouldn
'
t take it back
,
though.

"
If that had been Aspen
,
you wouldn
'
t have been pulling me off him.
"
I turn and take the porch stairs two at a time. I
'
m on the street before I hear Sebastian
'
s footsteps behind me.

"
Low blow
,
man.
"

He
'
s right
,
but I keep walking and he keeps following.

"
Jay
,
I get it.
Just chill out.
Don
'
t take off. I
'
ll get the girls and we can bring them home and then head back to my place or something.
"

Yeah
,
like I can do that. She didn
'
t want me there earlier
,
so I doubt she does now. My heart is still thudding.
My breaths still quick and fast.

"
Seriously.
What
'
s up with you
,
lately? You need to talk to me or whatever because right now you
'
re looking like you
'
re about to explode.
"
He crosses his arms. 

I don
'
t have time to answer because his cell phone goes off. I
'
m still walking away and he
'
s still following as he talks. A few seconds later
,
he says.
"
We gotta go back. The girls are waiting out front for us. Pris rode with Craig so she doesn
'
t have her car.
"

Finally
,
I stop walking.
"
Go get them.
"

Bastian looks back down the street
,
then at me
,
and down toward the house again.
"
Come with me.
"

He
'
s totally babysitting me right now and I don
'
t like it.
"
I can
'
t do this with you
,
Jaden. Not with him here.
"

"
I can
'
t go back or I won
'
t be able to stop myself from looking for him
,"
I say.

"
Then wait. I
'
ll grab them and be right back.
"

I tell him okay even though I don
'
t plan to do it.

"
Seriously
,
Jay.
Don
'
t bail.
"

"
Then hurry up
,"
I say
,
trying to sound light. As soon as he starts jogging back for the girls
,
I take off in the other direction.

Chapter Three

I don
'
t go home because
:

1
.
) I hate the place. I never want to be there
,
but especially when I feel like this and

2
.
) I know Sebastian
'
s determined ass is probably sitting in his car outside waiting for me. I
'
m not in the mood to see him or anyone else
,
so I walk around all night.

All.

Night.

Not my idea of a good time
,
especially since my hand is killing me
,
but I can
'
t think of anything else to do.

The sun is just starting to come up when I walk through the front door of my house. The second I step inside
,
I hear Dad
'
s heavy footsteps slamming against the hardwood floors.
Great.
He must have to work today. I turn to walk back out when he steps into the hallway.

"
Are you just getting in
,
boy? Who do you think you are
,
coming into my house at this time of morning?
"

His house
,
not mine
,
and I can
'
t help but wonder when he
'
s ever cared if I
'
m here or not.
Or when I come in
,
for that matter.
"
Won
'
t happen again
,"
I mumble because I
'
m not in the mood to deal with him.

Unfortunately
,
he seems to be in the mood to mess with me and by not playing his game
,
I probably just upped that need. When I try
to
walk around him
,
he grabs my arm.
"
So damn disrespectful.
No matter what I do
,
you never learn any manners.
"

My brain files those words to the folder filled with everything else I
'
ve done wrong.
"
I said it won
'
t happen again. Why don
'
t you let me go?
"
I try to pull away
,
but he pulls me closer.

"
Do I smell alcohol on you
,
little jerk?
"
His voice is harsh. Why does he hate me so much?

He doesn
'
t give me time to answer before he rips his hand off me.
"
You
'
re such a loser. You
'
ll never amount to anything.
Mooching off me and your friends
,
staying out all night and coming home drunk.
"

I
'
m going to explode. Like I
'
m a can of soda that keeps getting shaken
,
dropped
,
kicked
,
and finally I can
'
t stop myself from exploding. After
our last run-in
,
then Pris
,
walking around all night
...
I can
'
t handle any of it anymore and I need to fight back.

"
Jesus
!
Y
ou
'
re
like a broken record! Can
'
t you come up with anything new? I know I
'
m a loser
,
you hate me
,
I
'
ll
never be anything. If you don
'
t have anything new to throw into the ring
,
I
'
d like to go to my room now.
"
I manage to take a few steps away from him.

His oversized face turns red. I see his jaw tighten. I
'
ve never
,
ever
spoken to him like that.

I want to do it again.

"
You little punk.
"
For the first time in my life
,
his hand raises toward me. I brace myself for the blow
,
sort of glad it finally came to this.

Mom steps around the corner.
"
Mike
...
Don
'
t
,
okay? Let
'
s just go to the room and calm down.
"
Her
voice is shaking and I wonder if this will be the one thing to finally make her stand up to him.
To finally worry about me.

"
Did you hear the way he spoke to me? Of course you did. You always take his side. He
'
s your little prize
,
isn
'
t he? From when you thought you
'
d found something better
,
but it turned out I
'
m the only one who would
put up with you."

Mom f
l
inches
at
his words
,
her hand going to her face. I have no idea what he
'
s talking about
,
but there
'
s no way I
'
ll let him speak to her that way.

"
Leave her out of this. It
'
s between you and me.
"
An angered heat burns through me
,
threatening to turn me to ash
,
but I stand my ground.
"
You have something to say to me? Say it.
"

He suddenly laughs. It
'
s a
pissed-
off laugh that makes my fists beg to hit him.

"
Are you a big man now? About to graduate high school and you think you
'
re a man?
"

"
Mike
,
no—
"

He cuts her off.
"
Are you man enough to know your mom
'
s a slut?
How s
he screwed another man and got stuck with you? That I
'
ve been raising her little bastard kid for eighteen years because your
real
daddy didn
'
t want you
,
either?
"

I can
'
t breathe. Each of his words
are
a fist
,
slamming into me.
A foot kicking me.

Mom starts crying
,
hiding her face in her hands.

Dad?
No
,
Mike
is smiling.

I can
'
t feel anything.

He
'
s not my dad?

"
That
'
s right
,
kid. Your mom acted like a whore and then—
"

His words are cut off when my fist rams into his face. I feel the bones crack
,
but I can
'
t stop myself. I swing at him again
.
T
his time
,
he
'
s ready for it. He
knocks
my hand away and shoves me into the wall. My hand slams against it. Pain shoots through my head
,
my
knuckles
,
but it
'
s nothing compared to the way my heart has been cut open.