What a Boy Needs (7 page)

I know immediately by the way she tenses that I said the wrong thing. I
'
m almost
grateful for it
,
because that
'
s
us
. I say something stupid and she yells at me. It
'
s the way we work and I like it
,
but instead of laying in on me like she
'
s supposed to
,
her voice is soft when she says
,
"
I was worried about you
.
Last night
,
I know you went after Craig for me and I don
'
t know what happened at home
,
but
...
I don
'
t know. I just wanted to be sure you
'
re okay.
"

Now it
'
s me who tenses.
"
I
'
m fine.
"

"
You
'
re stubborn
,"
she counters. Her voice is getting a little louder and I can tell she
'
s getting frustrated.

I want to hold onto this moment because it almost feels like it used to. I don
'
t want to focus on what happened this morning or last night or last summer. I just want this moment.
"
And sexy
...
Funny
...
O
h
,
and let
'
s not forget I
'
m a good kisser.
"

The sides of her plump lips curve up a little. Pris shakes her head and mumbles
,
"
Stupido
.
"

It
'
s then I realize I
'
m smiling too.

We
'
re quiet the rest of the ride to Sebastian
'
s house. Pris doesn
'
t kill the engine.

"
Thanks
f
or coming to get me or whatever.
"

Finally she turns to look at me. Her eyes are dark
,
such a dark brown you can hardly see her pupils.
"
Always.
You know that
,
Jay.
"

And I do. No matter what
,
I know she
'
ll be there.

"
Are you okay?
"
Last night finds its way into my head again.
"
Because of
...
Craig.
"

She reaches out like she
'
s going to touch me
,
but then pulls her hand back. I
'
ve touched her a million times. Hugged her
,
had my arm around her
,
wrestled with her
,
but for some reason
,
I can
'
t remember the last time it happened.

"
You didn
'
t have to fight him
,
Jay. It wasn
'
t that big a deal. I was just hurt and embarrassed. It
'
s not as if I really liked him that much anyway.
"

Then why were you with him? Why did you waste your time on him?
"
He
'
s a loser. You
'
re better off without him. You deserve someone way better than—yeah
,
I
'
m just
...
"
I just have no clue what I
'
m saying.
"
Anyway
,
Sebastian
'
s probably peeking out the blinds like an old lady right now. I better get in there.
"

I push open the door
,
but her words stall me from getting out.
"
If you won
'
t talk to me
,
talk to him
,
okay? You don
'
t have to be so strong all the time
,
Jaden.
"

Strong?
No
,
not at all.
I wink at her.
"
Girls dig strong guys.
"

I get out of the car and close the door behind me
,
not man enough to look back at her.

The second I hit the porch stairs
,
Sebastian is standing in the doorway.

"
I hear I
'
m supposed to be staying with you to keep you under control for a while? Apparently
,
I
'
m your last resort.
"
I hold out my fist
,
willing him to just bump it with his. To play my game and not ask any questions I don
'
t want to answer right now.

But he doesn
'
t.

Sebastian wraps an arm around my neck and pulls me inside.
"
Welcome home
,
man.
"

Chapter Four

The last couple weeks before school
gets out
go so slow
,
I seriously consider
the idea
someone learned how to alter
time
just to screw with me.

Sebastian
keeps
trying to get me to talk to him about what went down at home that night
,
but I just don
'
t do the talking thing. I don
'
t get how it
'
s supposed to help. It
'
s not going to change anything. Mike will still be a prick who hates me for Mom
'
s screw up
,
and I
'
ll still be the son she never wanted who she let take the brunt of whatever happened between them.

No matter how many times I say it
,
those are the facts. Why put it out there so I can give them
another reason
to feel sorry for me? That
'
s one thing I can
'
t stand the thought of. Not when it comes to Sebastian
,
Pris
,
and Aspen.

Finally graduation day is here and Sebastian
'
s leg is jumping up and down while the principal gives a year-long speech when all we want to do is throw our caps in the air and be done with it. Actually
,
that
'
s not true. Sebastian
'
s nervous and I
'
m nervous because
,
well
...
it
'
s not like we
can
graduate without going out in style
,
right?

We
'
ve always known we wanted to do something big. Only we didn
'
t know what it was until recently. At our school
,
you pick who you walk with and whatever order you get in for rehearsal
,
you
'
re in for the ceremony.

I
'
m both on edge and excited as they get closer and closer to calling our names. Luckily
,
we have friends in high places
,
(
okay
,
maybe I mean people willing to be bought off
)
who agreed to help us.

Finally it
'
s time for our row to stand up and walk to the stage. I give Sebastian a smile as we
'
re waiting for our names.

"
Sebastian Hawkins
,"
the principal calls.
"
Jaden Sinclair.
"

As soon as my name clears his lips
,
the song
,
"
I
'
m Sexy and I
Know
it
"
starts
blasting
through the speakers. The huge overhead screen on the stage flashes with the words
,
"
Sebastian and Jaden Rock
"
. The teachers
scramble
to figure out what
'
s going on. But that
'
s nothing compared to how the crowd starts roaring with laugher as we dance across the stage to our theme song.

Principal South comes after us
,
but we dance out of his reach.

We both do the pelvic thrust like in the video and the laughter grows.

Sebastian has a huge smile on his face. It only lasts about twenty seconds
,
but the moment is epic. For the first time in I don
'
t even remember how long
,
I
'
m happy.

***

"
Jaden!
"
Mom calls as I start to walk away from her. She didn
'
t even mention anything about our graduation stunt. She hugged me
,
told me she loved me (yeah
,
right) and said everything was good for what I
'
d asked her to do for me.

"
Yeah?
"
I turn back around to face her. It
'
s so strange looking at her now.
My
whole life feels like a lie.
Like I don
'
t know who I am.
Did I ever know? I
'
m not sure.

She hol
ds out a paper.
"
Last summer
,
when things started to get worse with your father—
"

"
He
'
s nothing to me.
"
I grab the paper out of her hand.

"
You
'
re right
...
of course
,
but when things started to get worse
,
it
'
s because he found out I had that.
"
She points to the paper in my hand.
"
I thought you might want it someday.
"

Her brown eyes dart down. I should have known
.
How
could I not have known?
Neither she or
Mike have blue eyes like I do.

For some reason I can
'
t make myself look to see what
'
s on the paper. Can
'
t bring myself to say thanks
,
because I
'
m not even sure what I have to thank her for.
"
Bye
,
Mom
,"
is all I say before I walk away. I hate walking away from her
,
but she did that first
,
right? Still
,
it makes me feel like a piece of shit.

I make my way over to Sebastian
,
Aspen
,
and their parents. Automatically my eyes scan for Pris
,
but she
'
s not around.

"
First of all!
"
Sebastian
'
s Mom
,
Courtney
,
grabs me and pulls me into a tight hug.
"
Good job and I
'
m proud of you.
"