What This Wolf Wants (9 page)

“I’m sorry Zan, but it’s important.” Scott didn’t sound amused at finding his buddy half-naked with a mouth full of breast. Maybe this wasn’t the first time Scott had come upon Zan in this position. Jackie cringed at that delightful thought.

“If someone isn’t dead, they’re about to be.” Zan’s body radiated tension and sexual frustration. The power he was sending out was enough to make the hair on her arms stand up. His wolf was strong. Jackie already knew Zan was an alpha male, but the energy pouring out of him at this moment was enough to rival that of his brother’s.

She couldn’t stop the trembling that took over. Going from hot and horny to cold and embarrassed in zero point zero seconds
hurt
. Zan cupped her head, the pads of his fingers moving in small circles over her scalp, calming her, soothing her.

“Russel thinks it’s a possibility. That’s who’s on the phone.” Zan cursed low and harsh. “Fine. Keep him busy for a few.” When the footsteps faded, Zan brushed his lips over her temple.

“I’m sorry about that.”

Gingerly she extracted herself from his lap and turned her back, righting her bra and shirt with shaking hands. “For what? Lying to me, mauling me, humiliating me, or having to kill someone?” Rough hands gripped her arm and swung her around. “You think I was mauling you?” He looked incredulous and furious at the same time. A tingle of fear wormed up her spine when he shook her. “I’m a shifter. I can tell when you’re aroused, and baby, you were ready to explode.” When she tried to pull away his fingers only tightened. His grip wasn’t cruel, but it most certainly wasn’t gentle. Amber began to bleed into his eyes, letting her know his wolf was nearing the surface. High emotional levels had a tendency to do that to male shifters. “And as your mate it’s my job to take care of you. The only thing I’m sorry for is not giving you what you needed.”

Her eyes narrowed. “You don’t get to take care of me,” she hissed out. “And you have no idea what I truly need, so let me tell you. What I
need
is a mate that isn’t presumptuous. One who doesn’t take my choices away, doesn’t lie to me and hey. Let’s add not killing people as an everyday occurrence to the list just for the heck of it. You don’t fit that bill.” Muscles in his jaw clenched and twin spots of angry color rose in his cheeks. “If that’s what you think about me, you’re way off base. And you have no idea just what a male shifter will do to claim and keep his mate. And as for taking your choices away, I’d never do that. But you are by rejecting me. Denying me my mate.”

“Never fear, big boy. You’ll find another.” She yanked herself free.

“Really Zan. What did you expect? That I would fall into your arms and leave my home, my practice, and head back to Virginia with you when you tired of your brother. Then you’d leave me alone every time you headed out on one of your missions, knowing damn well you may not come back? Do you really think that would be good for me? Is that the right way to take care of me?”

He took a step back. “What do you know of my missions?” She couldn’t stop her gaze from briefly flicking to the tattoo riding his shoulder. The one she’d forgotten about while in his embrace. “You already stated you’re in the military and with all the chaos going on right now, it’s a dangerous profession to be in.”

His eyes narrowed. “And if I said I was nothing but a paper pusher?”

Jackie laughed humorlessly. “Right. Even if Joe hadn’t opened his mouth I’d know better. You’re a strong man in the prime of his life. A born predator. An alpha even. You’re very nature demands variety and action.

You couldn’t sit behind a desk for hours on end, day after day any more than I could submissively wait around for you to remember I exist. You are who you are and I am who I am. And together, we are not compatible.” His hands curled into fists at his side. “I will not let you do this, Jackie.”

She snatched up her bag. “Goodbye, Mr. Sutton.” Only angry growling followed her as she fled the house. Which was a good thing. Right?

But if this was what she wanted, why did it feel like a large black hole took up residence in her heart? And why were tears blinding her sight as she drove away?

Chapter Nine

Jackie turned off the engine of her truck in the parking lot of Thirio’s Keep, the shifter bar located on the outskirts of town. She didn’t come here often, preferring to spend any free time alone. Between clinic appointments and the numerous house calls she made on the side, she needed time alone to recoup. Whether working in her small garden or reading a book, she liked her down-time. She needed her down-time. She’d planned to enjoy this Tuesday evening, alone, at home. Only when she got home from work the house seemed too empty.

After tossing in some laundry she’d cleaned the already tidy house and paced an hour away. Fed up with herself, she’d driven to the bar, figuring an hour or so with the rowdy patrons would have her running back home in no time.

Rock music, though kept low in deference to sensitive shifter ears, could be heard through the heavy wood door. She pushed it open and paused just inside, letting her eyes adjust to the dim interior. She’d expected to see shifters at the various tables, laughing, shouting, drinking, eating, and basically having a good time. What she didn’t expect was a crowd lining the half-wall that separated the pool tables and dart boards from the general dining area. While no laughter was evident, occasional shouting punctuated with sympathetic groans and the sounds of fists hitting flesh did fill the air.

Unable to see over the throng she inched up to one of the waitresses that currently stood on a chair to peer over the crowd. Lisa looked down at her and blinked in surprise. “Jackie! Uh, what are you doing here?”

Jackie narrowed her eyes. While she didn’t visit Thirio’s Keep often, the shock in Lisa’s expression wasn’t warranted. And it made her suspicious. “Thought I’d come in for a beer.”

“Oh.” Lisa’s pretty blue eyes sparkled with wary amusement and she hopped down. “Well you sit down right here and let me get you one.” As if Jackie was blind as a bat and deaf to boot. “Why don’t you instead tell me what’s going on in there.”

Lisa bit her lip. “Well, uhm. There was a disagreement.” Another thud followed by a shout of encouragement. “There’s a fight, Lisa. Want to tell me what started it?”

“Not really.”

“Dammit, Lisa. It sounds like someone’s getting pummeled to death.”

“More than one actually.” At Jackie’s stern look Lisa blurted out,

“look, it’s not like Eddy and his cronies don’t deserve it. They been acting like asses for months now. Jackson’s tossed them out of the bar twice already for being jerks. They promise to behave and within weeks they’re being disrespectful again.” She tilted her head to the bar where Jackson was calmly drying some glasses. The man didn’t look at all concerned, which did little to reassure Jackie.

“Who are they disrespecting? You? Dean?”

At Lisa’s wide-eyed and unwavering stare Jackie frowned. “Me?” The waitress shrugged. “Eddy was throwing darts, talking smack about all the women and when your name came up, he laughed—and not kindly mind you—and said no one could pry your legs open with a crowbar. And then suddenly that Zan was up and out of his chair, a knife wedged in the dartboard. Next thing you know, they’re going at it. Zan and Eddy and Eddy’s idiot friends.”

“What?” Squawking in outrage, not only at Eddy’s comment—

because yeah, that deserved a thrashing or three—but the fact that Zan was fighting when he was still trying to recover from being shot. Not to mention he was probably outnumbered. In that moment, it didn’t matter what Jackie thought of Zan. He wasn’t operating at a hundred percent and Eddy or one of his pals might decide to fight dirty. They could kill him.

Heart pounding in her chest, Jackie followed Lisa’s example and stepped onto a chair. “Good Lord. Zan is fighting against three men.”

“Huh. Was five.” Jackson had strolled up behind Jackie.

“Five!” Jackie never took her eyes off Zan. “And no one thought to step in and stop it? Or help him? Or something?”

“Zan’s a dominant shifter, Jackie. He wants to be part of this pack, he needs to prove himself.”

Jackie tore her gaze from the fight and stared at Jackson. “Are you all insane? New members don’t fight for pack hierarchy. Besides it’s not like he’s sticking around. He has a life across the country.”

“True,” Jackson paused. “But as Dean’s brother, if he doesn’t prove his strength, or comes out looking like a submissive, it might reflect on Dean’s ability to lead the pack.”

Jackie could only shake her head at the idiocy of males. “And you think five to one is fair?”

Jackson ran his tongue over his teeth. “Well now. When Zan’s friends didn’t jump in to help, we all sorta stepped back to see what he’s got.”

In the back room, Jackie saw Zan flip a man over his shoulder to crash on top of a pool table. Now two were left. Jackie watched Zan’s every move, awed despite herself by his athletic grace, ripple of muscle and efficiency of motion. The man made no unnecessary strikes. Every jab was well placed and provided just the right amount of power for maximum damage. But to Jackie’s trained eye, she could tell he was tiring, and a tiring wolf would lash out harder, possibly kill someone. Even if he didn’t, even if he kept his beast under control, if this didn’t stop soon he would be back in her bed, and not the one in which he starred in during her naughty dreams.

She made a frustrated sound at where her libido was going and appealed to Jackson one last time. “Can’t you use the sprinkler system on them?” Dean had them installed at the bar and the wolf compound not only for fire protection but to use when the wolves got out of hand. Once turned on, the sprinklers sent out a powerful stream of water, achieving similar results as throwing a bucket of water on two fighting dogs.

“What? And ruin the pool tables?”

Jackie clenched her hands into fists just as another body landed on the pool table. Under the force and combined weight of two large men, one of the table’s legs gave out. A loud cracking was heard just as the table slanted down and to the rear of the room. “You’ve already lost one table.” Jackson shrugged. “One’s cheaper than four.” Exasperated, Jackie hopped down and headed for the back of the crowd.

* * * *

Even as something screamed and clawed deep inside to stop, his raised arm moved to deliver a slashing blow. His wrist was caught in a vise at the same time the red haze was ripped from his eyes. Jackie stood in front of him, her head angled back, her smaller hands now wrapped around his wrist the only reason his momentum stalled.

Shear horror flashed across Zan’s face in the nanosecond it took for him to realize that his extended claws were barely an inch from Jackie’s neck. The surge of fury was still twisting in his gut, only now it was aimed at himself.

He’d always been easy-going with a zest for life, yet with a steel core of right and wrong. Over the years his personality had changed, becoming darker. With each mission, whether a search and rescue or a termination, a blackness had slowly filled his soul. Hate at the evil in the world, anger at the loss of so many innocent lives, and despair at ever finding that one woman meant for him and him alone.

And she’d scorned him. Him! Because they were incompatible?

How could she even say that? Just when his innate happiness had started to peak through again he’d been flung into a maelstrom of confusion and that ever present hate. He’d wanted to destroy something, or someone, and when that ignorant ass’s comment had reached his ears, Zan had found the perfect opportunity to let loose his anger.

Maybe starting a fist numbing fight in his brother’s bar wasn’t the right thing to do, but it was better than nothing. And since he couldn’t toss Jackie over his shoulder, trot off to the nearest cave and set about changing her opinion of him in mutually satisfying carnal ways, he’d relished the chance to blow off some tension.

Only any tension release had quadrupled back at seeing how close his razor sharp talons where from Jackie’s tender flesh. “Oh, fuck.” Silent, sparks flashing in her eyes, Jackie twisted and dropped low, throwing her left leg out behind his knees, knocking Zan off balance. Then she flipped around and brought her right leg up, planting a mighty roundhouse kick right to the middle of Zan’s chest, releasing his wrist at the same time. Zan hit the ground with a loud thump, clouds of dust billowing in the air from the impact. The force of the blow would have caused a human to go into cardiac arrest, but for a shifter? Zan just lay there contemplating the wood beams of the bar’s ceiling.

Breathing might have been a bit difficult at the moment, but he could think. Admiration for her quick reflexes and instantaneous retaliation warred with shock and fear at what had almost happened. If Jackie had caught his wrist a second later…

Vaguely he wondered who had taught her those moves, not sure if he wanted to kill the individual responsible or thank him.

When Jackie’s face appeared over him he tried to apologize. To let her know he would never, ever hurt her. And will she might believe that, what could he say about being in a bar brawl. That he’d only been defending her honor? He’d been jealous? That he’d wanted to slam his fist into that drunk, moronic Eddie jerk because her name had passed from his lips?

Maybe she was right. He was an aggressive, proud, dominant shifter riding the ragged edges of sanity. He was strong enough to hide his restlessness from so many, yet weak enough to give in to his beast’s wild nature, as this very fight would indicate.

Maybe Jackie was right. Maybe they wouldn’t be a good match.

While she was far from a submissive, she didn’t have his deep seeded need to hunt and maim. What she did have was a classic beauty that floored him, a touch that soothed him and a body that fit his like a missing puzzle piece. Though intellectually he knew part of it was the mating heat, it was more than that which caused his blood to boil, his body to ache with lust so intense that he felt on fire.