When Love Breaks (12 page)

That’s it. I pull my fist back then launch it at him, punching him, as hard as I can, in the gut. Taken by surprise, I’m sure, he doubles over, lowering the phone in the process. I grab his wrist, then take the phone from his hand. He begins laughing.

“So, this is what it takes to get your attention?” He laughs some more. “If I’d known that, I’d have done it days ago.”

“Fuck you!” I spit.

As I glance at the phone, wondering what to say to her boss, it rings. The caller ID displays a number I don’t recognize.

“Maybe that’s her,” Michael says, so I throw up my middle finger at him, then wheel myself into another room.

Once in the dining room, I press the
on
button and raise it to my ear.

“Michael, is everything okay? My boss called to tell me you’ve called several times. Is it Logan? Is he all right?”

The bitter sweet sound of Elora’s worried, angelic voice, dances into my ear as a lump forms in my throat. She’s breathing harder than usual, and I can’t stop my mind from recalling the same sound the last time I saw her…when we kissed.

“Um…hi,” I say quietly. She hesitates before responding, but when she does, it’s in an equally soft voice.

“Hi.”

“How are you?”

“Fine. How are you?”

“I’m okay,” I lie. “There’s no emergency.”

“But, your brother—he’s been calling.”

“I know. He’s an alarmist. Everything’s fine.”

The truth is, nothing is fine
.

“Oh. Okay.”

The silence between us is too loud. I need to say things…lots of things.

“How’ve you been?” I ask, hoping she’s feeling the same, shitty way I am.

“Good, I guess.”

“And nursing school?”

“Logan, is there something you need from me?”

My heart screams
yes
, but I know that won’t get me anywhere.

“I’m…it’s just that…” I sigh. Let’s just put it all out there. “I wish you’d come back.” She sighs heavily. “I know, I know, you don’t want to break any rules, but we could just go back to the way it was before the kiss. We could do that, don’t you think?”

“Logan…”

“I still need help. You know my track record with scaring people off. I’ll go through the whole company, before I find someone to replace you.” I hear her soft giggle.

Good God, I’ve missed that sound.

“Yeah, your track record really is bad.”

“Then, will you come back?”

She sighs again.

“I can’t.”

“Why not?”

“You know why not and, besides, I’ve accepted another client.”

My mood plummets. I’m running out of ideas.

“Well, what about the wedding? Will you still accompany me?”

“I don’t know.”

“Please? I won’t find anyone else to go, and I’d really like to take you.”

I wait, on pins and needles, for her answer.

“I don’t know. Let me think about it.”

Well, that’s not a
no.

“Take all the time you need.”

“Okay. I have to go now. I’ll be late for work.”

“All right. It was nice talking to you,” I say, because it truly was.

“You too,” she says, just before our call disconnects.

I sit, stunned for a moment, when Michael enters the room.

“So, what’d she say?”

“Nothing much.”

“Is she coming back?” I shake my head, sadly. “Oh,” he says, then places his hand on my shoulder. “I’m sorry.” I nod, unable to speak at the moment.

“It is what it is,” I say, turning my chair in the direction of my bedroom.

“You’re not going back in there,” he says.

“Just leave me alone.”

“I just got you out of bed. If you think I’m letting you wallow in self-pity for one more minute, you’re crazy.” He then steps in front of me, blocking the way.

“Damn it, just let me go! I don’t want to think anymore. All I want to do is sleep.”

He places both hands on the arms of my chair and looks me dead in the face.

“I’m not going to let you do this to yourself. If you want that girl, then we’ll find a way to make it happen, but I’m not just going to sit idly by and watch you wither away and die. You’re my brother. You’ve had to endure a lot of shit lately, but you’re still a good person…in here.” He points to my chest. “If Elora’s half the woman you say she is, then she already knows that. You just have to remind her.”

I look up at him, unsure if it’s even possible.

“But, how?”

“Work hard at being the person she’s come to know. Work on your therapy. Get stronger. Make her forget all you’ve lost. Show her you’re just like everyone else. No. Show her you’re
better
than everyone else. Work on getting rid of the crutches and cane. If you do that, she can’t help but notice. And then…” He raises his eyebrows, silently suggesting I finish that sentence.

I’ve never thought of my brother as being super smart, but he’s right. Elora wouldn’t want to see me regress. She’d want to see me overcome my obstacles. My best chance at winning her over is to present her with the best version of myself.
Yes.
This could work.

“I’ll do it…but, I’m going to need your help.”

He grins broadly.

“Anything you need, you know that.” He pats me on the back. “I’m glad to have you back. I was beginning to think you were gone for good.”

“You sure tried hard enough.” I chuckle.

“Yeah, I wish I’d used the girl card sooner. It worked quite well.”

“So, you did it on purpose?”

“Kind of. I sort of stumbled onto it, but your reaction was perfect. I wish I could’ve anticipated the punch to the gut though.” He rubs his stomach. “That fuckin’ hurt, man.”

I give his stomach a playful slap.

“You deserved it, asshole.”

He laughs loudly.

“Just wait, until you get back on your feet again…literally. Then, we’ll see a fair fight.”

“Well, let’s start now. Go get my legs.”

He nods and heads in the direction of my room.

ELORA

I
hang up, then sag into the couch. That was almost painful.

“Is everything okay?” Daniel asks while holding onto his can of beer.

“Yeah. I mean, I guess so.”

“What did his brother want?”

I throw my phone onto the coffee table, then stand, and walk into the kitchen.

“I’m not sure.”

“Isn’t that who you were talking to?”

“Logan answered the phone,” I say, opening a bottle of water.

Daniel frowns.

“How’d that go?”

“I don’t know.” He looks at me expectantly. “What? I really don’t know. He asked me to come back to work for him. I told him I couldn’t, end of story.”

“Is it?”

“Is it what?”

“The end of the story?”

“Daniel stop.”

“What? Elora, you’ve been moping around here for days. Your eyes are puffy, which tells me you’ve been crying, and you’ve been baking like crazy. I don’t know what you’re doing, but I think your heart has declared war on your head.”

Well, if that’s not the truth…

“Yeah well, my head won, okay?”

“You’ve gotten yourself into quite a predicament here, and you need to think long and hard about what it is you want. It sounds to me like you can either have your job or a love life, not both. Are you willing to risk one to have the other?”

I sigh. I’m just not sure.

“I don’t know,” I say, secretly wishing I could have both.

He stands in front of me with his arms crossed at his chest.

“I don’t like this. I don’t like what this is doing to you. He shouldn’t be putting this much pressure on you—”

“He’s not!” I shout my interruption. “I’ve taken myself out of the picture! It’s done!” My small tantrum has made me feel a bit better, and I sigh again, feeling the need to apologize. “I’m sorry. I know you’re just looking out for me, but I can handle this. Trust me.”

“I hope you’re right.”

He glances at me with a disapproving expression, before he exits the room, and leaves me alone with my thoughts.

Maybe, he’s right, but it’s not like I’m in my dream job. I can find another one. Wait. What am I thinking? Falling in love with someone I’m taking care of could really reflect badly on me as a future nurse. What if I go through all this schooling just to be denied a job based on what happened the other day? Could that happen? Then, my whole career would be over before it started. And, what if I quit and the company sees my car in his driveway, mistaking my intentions for being over his house? They could take me to court, just like that other girl. No. I think it’s best if I just forget about Logan Turner. I’ve done all I can for him. He’s on the road to recovery now. He doesn’t need me anymore.

But, even as I think it, tears threaten.

10

ELORA

A
nother week has passed, since I talked with Logan on the phone, and now, I find myself driving toward his neighborhood. It’s late evening, and I’ve been circling the area for about an hour now, trying to talk myself out of driving all the way to his house. What am I doing? Why am I pulling down his street? What on earth am I planning to say to him? For what reason am I dropping in, unannounced? I stop a few houses away from his, and park my car in the street. The dusky camouflage hides my identity should I decide to abort the mission. Turning off the engine, I sit and contemplate my words.
Hi, Logan. How are you? Do you miss me as much as I miss you?
No, that’s no good.
What am I doing here, you ask? I’m…hoping you still want me and...
Ugh! This is so frustrating. I have no good reason for being here. I came here in the hopes that on the way, I would come up with a reason for stopping by and the words to say what I want to convey. But, my brain has failed me, as it’s my heart who is leading me.

As my hand touches the door handle, I close my eyes and say a silent prayer for clarity. I don’t know what will come from my lips, but I hope whatever it is, will be well received. I tug the handle and the overhead light pops on. Just then, a cute little VW Beetle comes clipping in front of me and pulls into Logan’s driveway. I quickly shut the door. Then, I watch in horror as a young, slender female exits the car and flounces up to the house.

Who the hell is she?

I hear the doorbell ring, so she must not be someone who feels comfortable enough to just walk right in.

Please don’t answer the door.

My hopes are dashed as the porch floor is illuminated by the opening of the front door. Maybe, it’s someone to see Michael.

“Oh, my God, Logan! You’re standing!” I hear the woman squeal from a distance, then she throws her arms around his neck.

My heart sinks.

He says something to her, but I’m too far away to hear him. Then, he opens the door farther. She walks in, and he closes the door behind them. Tears trickle down my cheeks, so I dash them away violently. How stupid could I have been? This was a ridiculous plan. I knew I wasn’t thinking straight. I put the car into drive and pull away rather abruptly, leaving my hopes and dreams behind me.

LOGAN

“O
h, my God, Logan! You’re standing!” Bethany says, as she hugs me around the neck, knocking me off balance slightly.

“Take it easy. I’m not that steady yet. What do you want?”

“Is that any way to treat your ex? We need to talk. Can I come in?”

I sigh, irritated at her tenacity, but hold the door open wider, to allow her entry. As I’m about to close the door, I see an unfamiliar vehicle race away from in front of the neighbor’s house. For a split second, I think the driver looks like Elora. I squint to see the woman’s silhouette from behind but can’t really see too much. Give it up, Logan. She’s probably nowhere near here. I close the door and turn to see Bethany making herself comfortable on the couch.

“So, you look good. It’s nice to see you vertical again,” she says with a smile.

“Cut the crap, Beth, what do you want?”

“What makes you think I want something? Maybe, I just wanted to see how you’re doing.”

“Because you always want something. It’s just not always immediately apparent.”

“Logan Turner, be nice!” she scolds, but I’m just not in the mood for her bullshit tonight.

“Believe me, that
was
being nice.” I take a sip of the beer I’ve been nursing for the better part of an hour and lean against the half wall by the foyer. “Why are you here?”

She scoffs at me, as if I care.

“All right, here it is. As you know, Ryan is getting married in a couple weeks, and I thought it’d be nice if you were my date for the evening.” My jaw drops open, and I’m sure my expression resembles that of someone who just walked into a Limburger cheese factory. “I know what you’re thinking—”

“I’m pretty sure you don’t.”

“You’re thinking,
why would I want to go with my ex-girlfriend?
Well, let me explain.”

“This ought to be good,” I mutter, then take another long draw from the bottle in my hand. On further inspection, I notice I’ve emptied it, so I head to the fridge for another one.

“Logan, are you listening to me?”

“I’m all ears.”

“Okay, here’s the thing,” she says as she stands and walks over to me in the kitchen. She comes to stand right in front of me and picks at an imaginary piece of lint on my chest. “I made a mistake. I shouldn’t have left you when you were away with your little, army friends.

I grab her wrist and hold it away from my chest, anger coursing through me.

“
Little army friends
?” I say, menacingly soft. “What exactly do you think me and my
little, army friends
were doing over there? Playing G.I. Joe?”

“Now, Logan, you know that’s not what I meant. I just meant that…well, you know. I’ve missed you, and I realize now, that I made a mistake.” She takes the last step between us, looks up into my eyes, and kisses me.

She fucking kisses me.

As soon as her lips touch mine, I grab her shoulders and hold her away from me, halting anymore progress she might’ve made.

“Are you crazy?” I ask, really wondering. “Why are you doing this?”

“I just thought that…”

“You thought what?” I say, letting go of her and walking to the other side of the kitchen. “You thought that I’d be so desperate for someone—anyone who’ll have me that I’d let you come crawling back into my life?”

I’m livid.

“Not exactly, but…” She shrugs as if in agreement with my hunch.

My jaw hits the floor this time. I can’t believe the audacity of this woman.

“Well, you’re wrong. I don’t need you or anything you have to offer. I’d pick being alone for the rest of my life over being with someone who runs when the going gets tough.”

“I know, and I’m so sorry. Like I said, I made some mistakes and—”

“And, one of them was coming here tonight,” I say as coldly as I can.

We stare at each other. Me: furious and breathing heavily, her: repentant and sad, although I’m not sure how much of her expression is real. She bows her head, and her sharp intake of breath stutters a bit. There was a time when seeing her cry made me want to comfort her. I’ll admit to myself that that feeling hasn’t entirely gone away, but knowing how she is, and what she’s done, brings that feeling to heel. Still, I need to calm down. I don’t love her anymore, but I don’t want her to get into a wreck from crying on the way home.

My deep sigh causes her to look up at me.

“Look, I didn’t mean to come across as that much of an asshole. I just…I just can’t go back to where we used to be.”

“But, why not? We were good together.” She takes a step forward, but I hold up my hand, stopping her in her tracks. “The wedding is weeks away. Won’t you at least think about it?

“I won’t change my mind,” I say adamantly.

“Are you seeing someone else? Is that what this is about?”

My eyes reach for the ceiling.

“This has nothing to do with anyone but you and me. I think it’s time for you to go.” I walk toward the door, expecting her to follow, and she does. Opening the door for her, I stand awaiting her departure. She takes a few tentative steps toward the threshold before turning around to face me. She reaches up and grazes my cheek with her fingertips. I stiffen but don’t move away. She then rises onto her tip toes and kisses my cheek. Again, I’m still.

“Call me if you change your mind. You know the number.” And, with that, she’s gone. I close the door and lean against it, letting out a long, steadying breath.

That woman still gets to me.

“Cindy called last night,” Michael says with a mischievous gleam in his eye. “She said she found the perfect dress to wear to Ryan’s wedding and that I’m going to want to see it up close and personal.” His eyebrows lift twice.

“That’s great, Michael. Are you two going to get busy right in the middle of the dance floor during the cake cutting ceremony?” I roll my eyes, and he laughs.

“No, I’m classier than that. We’ll wait until the place clears out a bit and find a quiet corner.” I sneer in disgust at his lack of respect for the newlyweds and his date. “What? She puts the
sin
in Cindy.” Again, he grins and nods knowingly.

“You do realize her name starts with a C, not an S, right?” He waves me off, and I sigh at his immaturity. “Do whatever you want. I’ll find my own ride home.”

“Wait, isn’t Elora driving you?”

“I’m not sure if she’s going or not,” I say, my heart instantly contracting.

“Have you talked to her about it?”

“Just that one day that you were trying to get her in trouble at her job.” I shoot him a dirty look, and he smirks.

Asshole.

“Well, you have her number now. Why don’t you call her?”

“I can’t. It’ll be…weird, and make me seem desperate.”

“You are weird and desperate,” he says, then laughs. I grab an apple and chuck at his head, but he catches it, then takes a bite.

“Thanks, man,” he says with his mouthful. “So, if you’re not going to call her, how will you know if she’s coming?”

“I won’t.”

“Well, that’s a great plan,” he says sarcastically.

“Shut up.”

“No, seriously. Why
would
you want advanced notice of having a date? I mean, that might lead to a healthy anticipation of this event and cause you to lighten, the fuck, up…We wouldn’t want that, now would we?”

I sneer at him again. I know what he’s doing. He’s trying to goad me into calling her. Well, I’m not playing his game today.

“Fuck off,” I say and push away from the counter, headed in the direction of my room.

“There you go. Do the one thing you’re really good at: running away when faced with a challenge.”

I stop, mid stride, and turn around. I’ve had enough. Walking aggressively toward him, I don’t stop, until I’m right in his face. Nose to nose. I can almost feel his breath.

“Don’t you
ever
say that to me again. If you’ve ever had to go through what I’ve had to go through, you’d never say that to me. I’ve been through—”

“Hell,” he interrupts. “You’ve been through hell, Logan. I know. You’ve told me often enough. I can practically recite your monologue by heart.” His tone is castigating and condescending, and I want to beat the look of sarcasm off his smug little face. He rolls his eyes. “I get it. Poor Logan. He’s had it so rough, and it just keeps getting worse, doesn’t it?”

My jaw tightens, and my fists constrict, as I think of every reason I can not to beat the shit out of him.

“
Stop
,” I say through gritted teeth. “Just shut the fuck up, right, now.”

“What’re you going to do about it? Huh?” he continues. “Clearly you’re too weak and wounded to fight for anything anymore. You used to be tough, you know? You used to go after whatever you wanted. What happened to that guy? Did the surgeons hack him off when they cut off your legs?”

That’s it!
I ball up my fist as tightly as I can and pull back, landing a right hook onto Michael’s jaw. I stumble forward a bit but recover my balance, anticipating his retaliation. I don’t have to wait long as Michael swings at me, punching me in the left eye. I fall backward against the counter but manage to right myself fairly quickly. I come at him again with a punch to the gut, which makes him double over, then a left to the side of his face. He then rushes me, while wrapping his arms around my waist, and jams his shoulder into my ribs, effectively slamming my back into the refrigerator. I hear the rattle of glass jars behind me, and the air exits my lungs in a rush. I keep swinging at him, but he won’t let go. Then, finally, he twists and shoves me hard. I lose my balance and land with a thud onto the kitchen floor.

Breathless and panting, and with his hands on his knees, he stands over me.

“Had enough?” he asks.

I say nothing.

He then does the unexpected. He reaches out and extends his hand, as an offer of help to get me off the floor. I hesitate. I’m still pissed and panting, but satisfied that I can still hold my own in a fight.

“Hey,” he huffs out, then smiles and gestures again for me to take it. I roll my eyes at myself as I accept his offer, allowing him to pull me to my feet. We eye each other briefly before he gives me a quick, brotherly hug. I reciprocate.

“Damn,” he says, while holding his jaw. “You’ve still got it.”

I smirk, looking at the damage to his face.

“I can see that,” I say, pointing out the bruise already starting to form on the right side of his face.

“Don’t think you came away unscathed, little brother. Your face is bleeding.”

I reach up and touch my eyebrow, feeling something wet. I pull my hand away to inspect the blood on my fingers.

“Thanks for that, asshole. I’ll look great at the wedding with a shiner.”

“We’ll be a set of bookends, won’t we.”

I chuckle.

“Yeah our dates probably won’t find it amusing though.”

He nods, and I sigh softly, resigned to the fact that I’m about to admit he’s done it again. He’s gotten me to agree to do something I was dead set against, and for my own good, no less. I grab the phone and turn to go into my room. I can almost hear his smug, triumphant smile.

The phone rings once, twice, three times. By the fourth ring, I’m about to give up, when suddenly, she answers.

“Hello,” she says as more of a statement, because caller ID doesn’t lie. She knew it would be me on the other end of the phone.

“Hi,” I reply quietly. “How are you?”

“I’m okay.”

“How’s your new client?”

“Fine,” she says, then swallows. “How’d you get my number?”

“You called me first, remember?”

“Oh. Yeah, I guess I did.”

The silence that lurks hurts my heart. I need to fill the space.

“So, I’m using a cane now.”

“That’s…good. That’s really good, Logan.”

I smile at the sound of my name on her lips.

“Thanks. I’ve been working hard, you know? Probably too hard. You’d probably yell at me to know how hard, but I’ve made a lot of progress.”

She snorts.

“I’m wagging my finger at you right now.”

I grin broadly and chuckle softly. God, I miss our daily banter.

“So, the reason I’m calling is to find out…well, the wedding is a week away now, and I was wondering if you were planning on going.” I squeeze my eyes shut, hoping to block out the word no.