Where She Belongs (8 page)

She
slipped into the hot stream, letting it caress her skin like a lover
slipping into the crevices of her body. She hoped it would draw out
some of the tension in her back and shoulders that she had felt since
Gabe called her about her dad's heart attack.

She
would make a massage appointment tomorrow as well. Trenton had
introduced her to the pleasure of professional hands when she asked
him for a neck rub one evening during finals.

Gabe
had once given her a wonderful neck and shoulder massage.

Fuck,
why could she not get away from this man? It seemed as if he had
always been part of her life. A mix of attraction and friendship
confused their relationship. She could puzzle over it for years and
she'd never understand why he kissed her in the office today.

Chapter 4

Shanna
stood in the doorway to Gabe’s office. She realized this was
the first time she’d stood at the threshold of his domain. She
felt a little flutter in her stomach at the thought of entering.

“
Have
you come for my files?” He didn’t look up at her.

Why
wouldn’t he look at her? Had she done something wrong? “No,
your secretary does your filing, I have no doubt.” Was he upset
by her rejection?

He
put his pen down and folded his hands. Then finally, his eyes lifted
to meet hers. She came into the room and stood before his desk.

For
a moment, she imagined that she worked here. It was lunchtime and she
would come down here to share a meal with him. She would lock the
door and sit on his lap, wrap her arms around his neck and kiss him.
The meal they shared would not be lunch.

Trenton
refused to have any sort of display of affection in the office. Even
a private one. At work they were professionals. At home they were a
couple. There was a clear line.

She
suspected if she worked with Gabe, the lines would be much more
blurred.

“
Well?”

“
Well
what?”

He
tipped his head to the side. “You okay?”

She
tugged at her shirt collar. “Your windows must face south, it’s
way hotter in here than my office.”

“
Our
windows face the same way.”

“
You
must crank your heat then. I don’t know. You are much more
frustrating in person.” She couldn’t admit fantasizing
about sex in his office.

Trenton,
Trenton. The thought cooled her a little.

“
I
said my secretary does the filing for me. And I asked who does the
filing in your office?”

“
I
do. That’s why it bugged me so much. Efficiency saves time.”
She stretched her neck.

Gabe
stood. “Sore neck?”

“
I
have a massage appointment later today.”

“
You
could have asked me.”

“
Well,
instead of your paws, Martina Lowe will ease all my tensions.
Remember when she used to have a crush on you?”

“
Sit
down and I’ll give you a quick rub right now. You’ve had
a few hard days. I’ve been pushing you.”

She
let him push her into his chair. His fingers dug into her muscles.
She let her head loll forward.

“
Have
you minded my pushing?”

“
No.”
She felt the tension leaving her entire body, slipping away.

“
You’ve
become complacent as an assistant. You have more brains than you’ve
been using.”

“
I
use my brain plenty, thank-you.”

“
Do
you get any credit for all this work?”

She
sighed. “I don’t need to be the center of attention.
Helping Trenton succeed is important. Trenton’s father threw
him into a job that he thought Trenton would fail at. So, once he has
convinced Byron he can do his job, then I can focus on myself.”

Gabe’s
fingers moved to her shoulders and started massaging them. She
groaned.

“
You
have really great hands.”

She
didn’t notice when he bent. His voice rumbled in her ear.
“Somewhere in here is my confident Shanna.”

“
I’ve
never been confident. Remember when I was away at college at the
start? I was so afraid I was going to fail. I called you every week.”
She lifted her hand to slap his desk.

“
Everyday,
my dear. You were a kid. After that first year, nothing scared you.”
His hands slipped down to her shoulder blades on her back. “When
did you get scared of going outside your comfort zone?”

“
I’ve
always been scared,” she whispered.

“
No,
I don’t buy it. You weren’t scared when you were fifteen
and you were out with your friends. They were what? Smoking pot?”

“
Pot,
hardly. I had no problem with pot. They had some Ecstasy.”

“
You
stood your ground and walked away. Showed up on my doorstep.”

“
I
was so drunk. I begged you not to take me home.”

“
I
let you sleep on the sofa.”

“
And
you never told my parents.”

He
laughed. “I told them, Shan. I called them after I got you
tucked in. I had to let them know you were safe. I convinced your dad
to go easy on you, especially since you stood up to your friends.”

“
Oh
boo, I stood up to my friends. That wasn’t exactly difficult.”

“
You
don’t remember it being difficult. You see it as a twenty-four
year old.”

She
stood up. “You always have to push a little further until
people get annoyed.”

“
Just
you, sweetheart.”

“
I
came here to ask you to come out with everyone tonight. Now I think
you can stay home.”

“
Too
late. Ricky Pattison asked me to come out tonight. I haven’t
really gone out that much in the last few months. It would have been
rude to turn them down again.” He smiled sweetly at her.

She
scowled.

“
Careful,
sweetheart, your face will get stuck like that.” He followed
her toward the door. “I’m not trying to annoy you. I’m
trying to get to know every part of you.”

Before
he could touch her, kiss her cheek, or worse, her mouth, she opened
the door and escaped him.

Shanna
stalked back down to her office. Rachel didn’t say anything as
she passed.

She
took a seat on her dad’s sofa, with her feet up. Confident. She
was confident. She was good at her job. She was valued in the
department.

Even
if she felt unfulfilled. Her job, even with it’s good paycheck,
wasn’t exactly challenging her.

She
kept talking about applying elsewhere in the company, or at other
firms. She wanted to work in the field she’d studied for.

Her
friends, including Gabe, encouraged her to apply for other positions.
When she mentioned it to Trenton, he encouraged her to apply for a
better job. But it would be better if she waited a couple more months
until the current project he had was over, or until their next
vacation.

She
frowned and looked at her watch. She needed to get back to work. She
had a long list of items on her To-do list. She also wanted to get to
the hospital and leave her feeling guilt-free for the evening.

She
could hope that Gabe wouldn’t show up at the bar at all. Given
the way her life was going, she doubted this would go her way.

*
* *

The
hot air, the smell of fresh poured beer, and the sound of some
country-rock music hit Gabe in the face when he opened the door. He'd
spent many evenings in this bar, with friends, co-workers and the
occasional date. Too many, it felt like sometimes.

Okay,
more than the occasional date. He'd been out with a lot of women, or
picked up in this bar by them. Sometimes things lasted one night, and
sometimes a few weeks or months. But in the end, something about the
women, something about the relationship, never felt right. He never
felt a spark when he kissed them. He never missed them when he was
away. He never cared about the minutiae of their lives.

Even
with his ex-wife, Lisa, it had seemed forced. He did love her. The
problem was she never really loved him. She hoped he would be her
means out of town; better paying jobs, nicer houses, fancier clothes
and richer friends. He’d tried, but in the end, they were
different people. He loved the town, the people, and most of all his
job.

He
stopped at the bar and grabbed a beer. Then he leaned there for a
moment while his eyes scanned the crowd. A pretty decent sized one
for a Thursday. His eyes found his goal and stopped. Her hair was a
rich mix of gold and dark brown highlights that tumbled when she
shook her head. Her hands and mouth moved wildly as she told Ricky
Pattison a story. He couldn't see her ocean-blue eyes, but he knew
they sparkled as she enjoyed entertaining someone.

She
stopped talking as her eyes found him. She smiled and waved at him.
She leaned over and touched Ricky's knee and Gabe felt a surge of
jealousy. Then she turned back and motioned Gabe over.

He'd
never wanted a woman to stick around in his life. No woman except
Shanna Whittikar. He'd done some searching and realized he couldn't
hide from the truth anymore. He kissed a woman yesterday, a woman he
desperately wanted. And not only physically, though that fire had
been burning for years. He loved talking to her. He found himself
making excuses to call her. Sometimes he'd be on a date and he would
excuse himself for ten or twenty minutes so he could hear her voice.
He loved sharing the details of their lives via the phone.

What
would it be like to share a house with her? A bed? A life?

He
took a long drink of his beer, then walked toward her. That ass she
thought she loved wasn't right for her. She'd never be happy to stay
home and raise children, which undoubtedly Trenton would want.

Shanna
should have children, if she wanted them. He wouldn’t mind a
blond boy and a girl with scarlet hair, running around his backyard.
He liked the idea. He liked the idea of a beautiful, pregnant Shanna
as well.

He
said hello to Ricky as the man vacated the chair next to Shanna.

"You
want a drink?" Ricky asked her.

"No,
thanks. I'm still working on my beer."

Ricky
nodded and walked to the bar. Shanna turned to Gabe with a wide
smile. "I cannot believe he married the Bryland girl. She was a
few years younger than me. And three kids now, at his age. My age!"

Gabe
smiled at her. He would make sure Shanna had everything she wanted,
including a few things she didn't know she wanted, running the
factory, staying here, and Gabe himself.

After
yesterday, he knew she was still attracted to him, and she'd always
cared for him. He needed to show her that they belonged together.
She'd always been his.

He
curled his hand around the bottle tighter, squelching the urge to
touch her. What had they been discussing? Ricky Pattison. "Some
people know what they want early on, and some people take a bit
longer to realize what they want."

"True.
I always have a plan. One, five, and ten years. I have my future
mapped out."

He
was going to burn her map to ashes and he didn't feel a bit sorry for
it. He was dying to tell her, it stretched his self-control to its
breaking. He wanted to confess his feelings, and desires. It was too
soon for that. He needed to regroup and plan first. He had hoped
something would come to him before he got to the bar, but nothing
yet.

“
I
prefer to go where the wind blows. But once I set my eyes on
something, nothing will stand in my way." He locked into her
blue eyes. Her eyes swirled confusion for a moment, then she looked
away, across the table. Half the group was from the factory floor,
the rest he assumed were friends of hers from high school. He had
former classmates here, as well. Small town.

"So,
Shanna, I heard from Ross that we are going to get some new equipment
from you," Treena Morris said.

"I'm
working on it. I'm only here for ten more days. I don't know how much
I can really get done."