Wings of Deception (33 page)

They left and were
on their way to their next destination before Honey remembered Sang-mi’s farewell to Jacks and his boisterous laughter.

“What did she say to make you laugh so back there?”

“Sang-mi?
Oh, she just said I best hurry up
and marry you and
maybe you could
still
give me at least two sons.” H
e laughed again at the look on Honey’s face.

“Hey, she liked you and that was a compliment
,
whether you know it or not.”

Honey decided not to pursue the issue and wished she had not asked.

“So what is this other thing you are taking me to see?”

“We
are
there. The taxi pulled over and he got out and helped her out. They were standing in an older neighborhood of houses that were more on the rundown side. He took her hand and started toward the corner where a church stood just as shabby as the houses around it.
When they were in front of it Jacks stopped and Honey was totally perplexed.

“Why are we here standing in front of a church? You do
not
even believe in God.”

“You want to know me
,
don’t you? We are here because to know me
,
I have to take you back to my childhood. You met the young Jacks as a teen back there at Sang-mi’s. A scoundrel and a thief by the time I was fifteen. I was living on the streets by then and no one cared as long as the checks kept coming.”
He took her hand and led her into the church coming to the first pew he sat her down and sat with her looking at the all too familiar surroundings.
It had changed little through the years, if any.
His face wore no expression that Honey could tell until he continued, and then she saw a range of emotions as he described his younger years. She listened as the hopes a little boy had of becoming part of a family turned to hurt as he went from one foster home to another
,
instead. The pain as he relived the beatings
,
abuse
,
and
the anger as he was forced to
accept
the abuse
,
for he had no voice that would be heard. He did
not
leave anything out
, even the worst of it
and by the time he finished
,
she was crying inside and out. He stopped and she wiped her eyes, she did not understand why they had come to the church for him to tell her his story. He saw her tears and handing her a handkerchief said wryly, “I am not telling you all this to have you feel sorry for me. It
is
just that I have never wanted anyone to know me as I want you to know me. I love you, I want to share every little bit of me and this is a big part of who I am.”

“Why the church though? I don’t understand.”

“Do you see that alter up front? Yeah, well that is where I decided that if I were to live
,
I would have to do it on my own. My last foster parents got me when I was ten. I had never heard of God before then but got a crash course from them. The man tried to beat God into me
,
or the devil out, not sure which. His wife would take me down to that alter right there,” He pointed at a certain spot. “She would make me pray for all my unholy
sins;
all the while telling me
,
how hot hell was and I was headed that way. At first I thought God was someone who could help me and I did pray frantically. It took me a while to realize it was not working, that there was no one there.
No one.
Can you
not
see that if God were real
,
he would have let me know?
He would have helped me.
”

Honey had no words
except, “I am sorry Jacks, I am so sorry that you were cheated out of your childhood. The thing is
,
believe it or not
,
you were one of the lucky ones. Look at you now! You made something of your life, you are somebody and I think you had much more help than you know.”

“How
is
that?”

“You were strong and you survived. So did
I
,
but
J
acks not all children do. My sister Bea, she did
not
. She died a horrible death because she could
not
endure.”

“What happened?”

She told him the story of her own dysfunctional family upbringing. How her father abused her and her brother and sister. How Bea swallowed a bottle of pills taken from their parents medicine cabinet in a moment of hysteria from the
sexual advances of their father.

“Oh my God!”

Honey smiled. “You do
not
believe in Him, remember?”

“
Yeah right, a
nd this was your true father? Did he, did he….well you know?”

“Yes, our own biological father and no, it was
not
rape but the damage of molestation is sometimes as severe as rape.”

“What about your mother?”

“She was clueless. Bea tried talking to her but she was one of these people who just did
not
get it. And now you know why I stopped believing in God as a child
.
M
aybe not in the same way as you but all the same
,
I started
believing
that the Jesus I was taught in Sunday school was not a real person
.
As I grew into an adult
,
it was easy to believe in a power that was who or whatever you deemed it to be. I did not believe that there was this entity that really cared enough to be born of the flesh as we had to be and that He loved us so much that He gave His life
,
so that we could live eternally with Him, if we choose too.
”

“So you believe that Jesus Christ was a real person but also God? Not much sense in that concept for me. I
am
sorry but does not every religion have a similar story?
How do you know He
exists
, w
hat proof can you offer?”

Honey re
membered what Jacks had said to her the night before and smiled.

“Last night
you told me that you knew what you feel for me is real
,
though it is not something you can see, taste, smell, hear or touch, remember? I know that God is real
in
the same way.
”

Jacks stood, took her hand and pulled her up and for a split second she thought he might kiss her right there inside
the
church. But he did
not
.

“We best be getting back to the hotel.
W
e
have a visit with
Asa
, remember
?
”

Neither mentioned the conversation again but both reflected back on it while back in
the
taxi and while they freshened up to make the trip to the stone house.

                                                                   TWENTY-SIX

Sheila helped
Dwight
get little Gem down for the night so that
when Alice arrived she would already be sleeping and Alice could concentrate on her studies. She was enrolled at the community college that was nearby and since she had been replaced as a nanny she loved to fill in any night or weekend she could.

They were going to see a new movie that had just come out called
The Blind Side
. It was a true story and
Dwight
knew some of the people the movie portrayed. He was anxious to see it and Sheila loved anything with Sandra Bullock in it. Afterwards
,
they were to meet Joe and Brenna for a late dinner.

Sheila
was comfortable with the relationship she had with
Dwight
. She adored him and she adored Gem. It was what she had waited for all her life and she knew her parents would be proud that she had pulled herself up by the bootstraps after Morgan, instead of wallowing in self pity. She often thought that if she had not met Morgan then she might have never met
Dwight
either.

Dwight
could not be happier. He would always love Kim but Sheila was becoming more important to him every day. He never doubted that God had sent her to him. He had plenty of room in his heart to love Sheila as she should be loved without feeling guilty.
He also knew that Kim would want him to be happy again and would want Gem to grow up with a mother’s love. It would soon be two years since she had gone. It had been a lonely time until Sheila showed up and changed everything. He knew he
was
ready to
ask her to marry him and he was thinking that she would say yes.

The movie
was an emotional one which
made Sheila cry and brought tears to
Dwight
’s eyes as well. They left the theater and walked down to the Mexican place in the same plaza to meet Joe and Brenn
a who laughed
when they saw her red eyes.

“I told Joe you would cry! Wasn’t that the best movie?” Brenna hooked her arm through Sheila’s and they walked
in
ahead
of the guys.

Halfway through dinner Brenna’s cell phone rang.

“I’m sorry ya’ll but
I can’t hear
….” She got up and walked out of the building for better reception. When she came back in she looked disturbed and told Joe, “
Marley
said that Carol woke up with a 102 temperature.
She gave her Tylenol but I think we should leave soon.”

Sheila asked, “Has she been feeling bad?”

“Not really, it’s probably one of those virus things everyone has been having and no big deal. It’s just that….”

Dwight
pitched in, “We understand, you both have been through a lot with Carol and I don’t blame you at all. I…we feel the same way about Gem.”

The other couple did not notice the look that passed between
Dwight
and Sheila nor did they notice the ‘we’ in his statement. They rushed to finish their meal and with apologies for cutting the evening short they headed home to check on Carol
. B
ack at the restaurant
Dwight
humbly
asked Sheila if she would be his wife and mother to
Gem
. 
She did not have to think about it
,
because she already knew this was her destiny
and she said
,
yes.
Dwight
was the man she had dreamed about and prayed for her entire life and Gem was a thrilling bonus. It was a night forever etched in both their memories
and the night
Dwight
finally kissed her as he left her at her door. It was a tender
first
kiss full of promise and Sheila delighted in his shyness
,
refus
ing
to think on
her own unpleasant
past
marriage
. She was determined not to let her experience with Morgan ruin her life
but as she prepared for bed she felt a tingling of fear and
attributed
it to
those unhappy memories
. The devil would not want her to be happy and she chased away the fearsome feelings with prayer,
the Lord has not given me a spirit of fear but power, love and a sound mind, Amen.
 

                                                                        TWENTY-SEVEN

The car waited
. A
t the last minute Honey ran back in her room to retrieve her newly charged cell phone.
When s
he slid in
to
the back
seat
with Jacks
,
the sun was already down
and the night was replacing the day
.

She was apprehensive about meeting this person
Asa
. She was
curious. A grandfather popping up after forty years had to be about as shocking as it gets
. T
hough she was happy that Jacks had
discovered
a relative after all those years, the story he had told her was one for the books.