With Honor (9 page)

Dizziness washed over her and she leaned against the wall for support. The next thing she knew, Shane was lifting her into his powerful arms and carrying her down the shadowed hallway into her bedroom. She didn’t give him one peep of objection. With careful tenderness he lowered her to the middle of the mattress. Once he started to move away, and before logical reasoning kicked in, she touched his arm. He looked down at her in question.

Reaching up, she grabbed his shirt, tugging him down next to her. She wasn’t sure what had come over her, but she wanted to be close to him. “Stay,” she whispered.

“Jasmine, I–” He steadied himself on elbows above her.

No doubt a refusal was coming, but she didn’t give him a chance to voice it. She cut his words off with her lips, slipping her tongue past them. He tasted of beer and a hint of mint–an exhilarating combination. Seconds seemed to crawl by and he wasn’t responding. She thought he’d move away, but he didn’t. Then his hand came up to the back of her neck, and he threaded his long fingers into her hair. He plunged his tongue deep into her mouth.

He covered her body with his, pressing her into the mattress. His chest pressed against her tender breasts and their hips connected. Jasmine rotated her bottom, circling them, arching to meet the growing bulge behind his zipper. He moaned and it sent tingles all over her body. Hearing his sweet groans of need excited her–empowering her. This was a kiss that she’d never experienced before.

Wrangling his fingers deeper into her hair, he moved himself between her inner thighs. Rewarding him, she wrapped her legs around his waist and tugged him closer. The thick seam of his jeans rubbed her clit and prickles of heat consumed her moist center. On fire and full of need, she felt ready to explode. She wanted skin contact. Reaching underneath his shirt, she smoothed her hands across his toned stomach and over his broad chest. With a tip of one nail she flicked a hard nipple.

In the growing darkness, she couldn’t see his expression but she felt his body tighten. He pulled back.

“Shane? What’s wrong?”

He lifted himself completely away from her and sat on the edge of the bed.

Jasmine reached over and clicked on the bedside lamp. His face was buried in the palms of his hands. “Talk to me” she said.

“We can’t do this.” He didn’t look at her.

Laying a hand on his shoulder, she felt him flinch. “Why? We’ve done this before.” Confusion clouded her mind. He’d been as turned on. She’d felt it.

Jasmine watched his profile. His eyes were steady on the wall. He looked like he carried the world on his shoulders. She removed her hand and laid it in her lap. Her fingers were trembling.

“I can’t let this happen,” he said.

Painful emotion climbed her chest. “If it’s that you don’t want me–”

“It’s not that.” He brought his gaze on her. “That’s not it at all.”

“Then what?”

“You’re a beautiful, sexy woman. And you’re pregnant.” He got up and moved across the room.

“By you,” she said.

“I’d be taking advantage of you if I did what I’m aching to do right now.”

Awkward reaction, but she laughed. “Too late to get all gallant on me.”

He paced the floor, back and forth, until he finally stopped in front of her on his fifth run. “What if I hurt you?”

“You’re, uhhh…built, Shane, but not like a horse. I think we’re good.” She was still smiling. His concern was cute and an utter turn-on.

The look he gave her reminded her of a man who expected doom. “I didn’t ask you to move here for this reason.”

“I believe you.” Did he forget that she made the first move?

“There’s a lot about me that you don’t know.”

“No worries. I’ll still have respect for you. I promise.”

Crossing his arms over his chest, he glared at her. “You don’t understand.”

All humor left her. “What is it? Help me understand.”

He appeared to be fighting an internal battle. He finally asked, “Are you feeling better?”

Disappointment raged within her. She couldn’t help him if he didn’t trust her enough to explain. Yet, she couldn’t force him. “I’m fine.”

“I’ve got to go,” he said.

His mind was made up, so she’d have to let him go. If he didn’t want her, then she needed to accept that.

Chapter 6

Finishing two hours of PT, Shawn slid off his shoes, stripped off his sweaty tee and shorts. As he climbed into the cold spray of the shower, the pressure of the water felt good against his taut, heated skin. He just wished he could find relief for his mind, and his balls. With vigorous strokes he scrubbed his body, paying extra close attention to the area of his body that begged for comfort. Unfortunately, it craved a woman’s touch…and that’s where he couldn’t give in, at least with one in particular.

Body less tense, and mind preoccupied with momentary release, he turned off the water. His cell was ringing. Grabbing a towel, he caught his phone on the fourth ring. “Conner here.”

“Hi, Mr. Conner.” He didn’t recognize the woman’s voice, but he did identify the intercom of a doctor’s office or hospital in the background. “This is Nurse Stevens at Dr. Freedmon’s office. I am calling regarding Jasmine Sinclaire.”

“What’s wrong?” He tightened his grip on the phone. The plastic cracked, so he loosened his hold. He began to dress.

“Ms. Sinclaire wanted me to call and ask if you could be here within twenty minutes.”

“I’ll be there. Where are you located?” There wasn’t a second to waste. Once the address was out of the nurse’s mouth, he pushed his feet into his boots in record speed.

Shawn was used to break-neck speeds in an airplane, but on the streets he had to share the roads with others–and it pissed him off. He was the only one in a hurry. He sped around a slow driver then hung a right onto the highway. His mind raced faster than his Jeep.

What the hell happened to Jasmine? Or the baby?

His stomach twisted. If he allowed something to happen to her, or the baby, he’d never forgive himself. His brain hurt with fear. His speedometer rose to seventy, and he pushed the gas pedal. If a cop wanted to chase him, that was fine, but they wouldn’t catch him until he pulled into the doctor’s office parking lot.

The fifteen-minute drive turned into only ten minutes. He tore into the lobby of the office.

The receptionist eyed him as he stepped up to the counter.

“I’m here for Jasmine Sinclaire.”

“You must be Shane?”

“Yes.” He found it hard to speak through the tightness in his chest. Damn, he wasn’t out of shape, but the fear made him winded.

The young woman stood up and came out from behind the cubicle. She pointed down the hall. “Room 3A. They’ve been waiting for you.”

Nausea rushed over him. “Is Jasmine okay?” The child she carried was all the family he had left…possibly all he had left of Shane.

The receptionist nodded and offered him another smile. “You better hurry.”

With an agitated sigh, he followed the wide hall and found 3A. Throwing open the door, he found Jasmine sitting on the examination table, flowered gown on and a bright smile on her lips. She didn’t look hurt. In fact, she looked pretty damn good, even in the ugly examining robe.

“You’re fast.” Her smile grew wider.

“I drove like a maniac. I had to outrun a patrolman, but it’s all good.” He dragged in a breath and exhaled slowly. His heart rate finally slowed.

“Really?” Her smile weakened.

“No.” Strolling into the room, he glanced over her from the top of her head to the tips of her feet encased in blue booty socks. “I hope you didn’t call me here just to see how cute you are in those socks. I’d be seriously miffed.”

With laughter and a dramatic wriggle of her toes, she shook her head, sending her ponytail swinging. “No, not the socks. But the baby.”

“Baby?” He threw up an eyebrow. Maybe all wasn’t well. His heart pounded.

She gave a quick nod toward the monitor to her right. “I came here because I had spotted blood. Dr. Freedmon decided we should take a look at the baby just to make sure all is okay. I thought you might like to see our baby on television too.”

“Blood? Television?”

“Are you okay? You didn’t hit your head on the way here, did you?” Her eyes slanted.

“Are we ready?” A voice from behind him interrupted his answer.

Shane turned as the doctor shut the door on his way into the room.

The gray-haired man offered Shane a smile. “You must be the proud father. I’m Doctor Freedmon.”

Shane shook his hand, although he was still in shock.

“We’re ready, Doctor Freedmon,” Jasmine offered.

“Well then, let’s get you laid back here and your feet into the stirrups.”

Shawn stood at the end of the bed, feeling like a fish out of water. Doctor Freedmon tapped him gently on the shoulder. “Son, would you like for me to give Jasmine the ultrasound, or would you prefer I give you detailed instructions so you can give it to her?”

Pulling himself out of his worried cloud, Shawn realized he was standing in between Jasmine’s legs, blocking all access. With an apologetic expression, he moved. “Better let you do your job, Doc.”

The doctor pulled a tool-like long apparatus from the machine and proceeded to slip a condom-like sheath over its length.

Shawn eyed the contraption. “Wow, that’s an interesting looking gadget.”

Doctor Freedmon smiled. “We hear that a lot from first-time fathers, until they realize where it inserts into.”

“Huh?” Shawn’s mind raced. “Inserts where?”

“The baby is too young yet to get the best visual with old technology so we use a vaginal probe to get the pictures.” The doctor sat down onto the swivel chair, rolled up between Jasmine’s legs and stuck his hand between her knees.

“Vaginal probe?” Shawn didn’t like where this was heading, literally.

“The probe doesn’t hurt the mother or the baby. Rest assured, it’s all worth it,” Doctor Freedmon said in a calm voice. Shawn was stuck somewhere between
large probe in vagina
and feeling a little confused when the screen flickered with blobbed black and white images. “There’s the baby.” The doctor pointed at one of the brighter masses.

“Great, honey, we’re having a blob,” Shawn joked.

Neither Jasmine nor Doctor Freedmon laughed. In fact, Jasmine’s eyes were misted with tears.

“Look closer.” Doctor Freedmon proceeded to show them the outline of a mermaid-looking shadow. “And here is the heartbeat.”

Shawn’s world came to a stand-still. In this tiny little gray figure was a heartbeat. The heartbeat of a Conner. Shane’s memory would live on, even if he wouldn’t. He heard a sniffle and looked down to find Jasmine’s cheeks wet with tears. She attempted to wipe them away, but they seemed to fall quicker than she could clear them.

“What’s wrong, baby?” Finding a box of tissues, he grabbed several and handed them to her.

Blotting her eyes, she looked up at him. “I…I don’t know what’s wrong.”

“Are you sad?” Searching his mind for what he should do to help, he felt useless. Seeing a woman cry ate through him. He wasn’t equipped to handle that emotion. Glancing across Jasmine’s horizontal figure, he narrowed his eyes on the doctor. “Hey, Doc, what’d you do? Did you hurt her? You said this wouldn’t hurt.” His tough, protective character came swirling to head.

Jasmine laid a hand on his forearm. “Shane, it doesn’t hurt. And I’m not sad. I’m happy. I don’t think I knew how happy until I saw our baby.”

“Sorry, Doc,” Shawn offered.

Doctor Freedmon didn’t seem offended in the slightest. “At least you didn’t pass out. That’s a good thing,” he said as he withdrew the probe and removed his gloves. “And to reward your participation, everyone gets a going-away prize.” He stuck something into an envelope and handed it to Jasmine. “The baby looks fine. Bleeding can be normal as your uterus makes itself nice and comfy for the growing embryo. If it continues into next week, or worsens, don’t hesitate to call. You can get dressed now. The nurse will be in to give you information on how you should take care of yourself. Good luck, dear.” He patted her hand and left.