Wrecked (The Blackened Window) (20 page)

I didn’t wait for his answer, but pulled him back to me, licking his lips, only the outside of his mouth. His lips parted softly and I started licking around the edges. Somewhere, my inebriated frontal lobe got a nervous feeling that this didn’t seem like my Xander, but my reptilian brain stem didn’t seem to care.

My right hand stayed in his hair, pulling just a little, and my left dropped down to his chest then back around his neck, slightly inside his collar. I flexed my fingers and my nails dug into his neck. He drew a shaky breath, letting it out in a hiss. He ran his hands up my sides and I paused in kissing him to grab at his hands to stop him from touching me, but he anticipated it, or I was too drunk and slow. Either way, he grabbed my wrists and yanked me forward. He roughly and quickly guided my wrists behind my back and captured them both there with one hand. And just like that, any pretense of sexual dominance on my part was shut down.

“Leda. Little girl. You still don’t understand.” He spoke softly and traced my lips and earlobe with the forefinger of his free hand. “That’s not how this works. You belong to me. Yes, we are leaving and no, you are not going to fuck the hell out of me tonight. I’m going to make you suffer tonight. I think you need it, don’t you, little girl?” He whispered in my ear and I could feel the shock cross my face at the complete reversal. He squeezed my wrists and pressed his body into mine, growling, “Don’t you?”

“Uh-huh.” I felt a weird and sexy wide-eyed terror, centered in my chest and pussy, making me completely breathless.

“Okay. I’m going to pay the tab and get you some water and you are going to sit your fine ass on this bar stool right here. You are going to wait until I come back and then you’ll drink the water then we’ll leave.” He pulled the barstool out with his foot and lifted me onto it in one motion.

After he walked away, I mumbled, “Shit. I think I’m in trouble.”

Christy came over to me. “What the fuck was that all about? He looks like he’s ready to tear your skin off with his teeth.” She cracked a huge smile. “It looks like you’re gonna have some fun, lady!”

“What? He’s sort of terrifying!” I turned to her, wide-eyed but flushed with excitement.

“You wanna fuck with his head? Keep telling him yes, just let all the fight go out of you. That’d be hilarious. Or call him daddy all night or something like that.”

“I don’t know, those aren’t really… I don’t think I’m into the daddy thing.”

“Well, you never know till you try it. Or… Oooohh! Or you could act like he’s not getting to you at all. Don’t let him know how much you want him! Oh God, the Great Xander, taken down a peg. I love it.” She was laughing, but I couldn’t really take it in because he was back.

He wordlessly handed me some water and left me to it, while he said goodnight to Jason. The lack of eye contact, the lack of any affection—I knew something was coming and it made me anxious—made me feel rowdy and obedient at the same time. I drank my water down quickly, just because it was what he’d told me to do.

When he came back for me, he grabbed me around the waist and threw me over his shoulder.
Thank God I’m wearing jeans tonight
. I waved at Jason and Christy over his back as he carried me out of the bar, like this was a normal way for people to behave. A borderline hysterical giggle bubbled out of me.

Interestingly, no one in the bar even really reacted. His left arm held my legs in place and, when I squirmed, he slapped my ass with his right hand, before we were even through the door. By the time we got to the car, he had spanked me six more times and my ass was starting to burn. Just before we got to the car, he reached his right hand into my crotch and roughly rubbed around my pussy. I flashed to a slapdash fantasy of him dropping me on the hood of his car and fucking me, hard. He unlocked the car remotely and opened the door with his right hand and kneeling, placed me in the passenger seat.

“Sit still and keep your mouth shut.” By now the alcohol was in full effect and I felt slightly slack-jawed and dumb, so not talking was probably fine. He turned the music on loud and pulled out of the parking lot.

Chapter Seventeen

Xander

Minstry,
Lay Lady Lay

We drove without speaking. I saw the alcohol hit her, the glazed look in her eyes. But I knew I was in trouble.

I took her to her apartment, knowing I wanted to fuck with her, but that she was intoxicated. She couldn’t fucking consent right now. I wouldn’t leave her alone, but I wouldn’t take advantage of that either. I wanted her to have the security that came from being at home.

Once we were inside, I got her another glass of water. “Okay, when you sober up, we’ll talk about this shit.”

She looked at me with pure surprise on her face. “But… I thought…” She trailed off.

“You thought I’d want to fuck you while you were too drunk to be fully present.” I cocked my head to the side. “Umm, no.”

She stilled and sadness crossed her features. “Are you mad at me?”

“Not really. No. I’m just frustrated.” I sat on the couch and she came to sit next to me. “It isn’t easy. Wanting you all the time. And you keep telling me you’re ready. I want to be sure. I don’t want to mess this up, Leda.”

“Look, I’m not that drunk.”

I cut her off with a sharp laugh. “Whatever comes after that sentence is going to be a terrible idea.”

She chuckled and said, “Let’s watch a movie and I’ll get clearheaded. Then we fuck!” She was like a human-emoji giant smile and I couldn’t stop my laughter as I agreed to the movie, at least.

I made a quick snack while she found something to watch. Once we were settled, we snuggled on the couch under her comforter. It honestly wasn’t that late and I held out hope that she would sober up before bed, so we could at least resolve this before sleeping.

It wasn’t a very long show but was light and funny and helped adjust the mood. She drank several glasses of water and had a snack, so I felt better that she would at least not have a hangover in the morning, but when the movie ended, she looked at me, completely clear-eyed.

“Hey, I get that you don’t want the first time you fuck me to be when I’m drunk, but please don’t tell me that you’d never fuck me when I was drunk. Drunk sex is fun!” She was serious, pleading with me to understand.

“Drunk
sex
can be fun…or awful. Drunk BDSM probably shouldn’t be legal— Fuck, probably
isn’t
legal.”

She winced and I added, “How are you feeling now?”

She shrugged. “I’m completely sober. And I still want you to fuck me.” She glanced down at her hands in her lap. “Xander, I always want you to fuck me. It never goes away.”

“Really?” My cock tightened in my jeans.

“Yeah. How much longer are we going to do this?”

I felt smirky, like a smart ass, ready to test her a little. “Not too much longer. Come on.” I stood and offered her my hand. She took it and I walked her back to her bedroom, feeling my own banked need flaring up again.

I stood her at the foot of the bed and pushed her forward, holding her hips so she bent in half.

“Don’t move.” My voice was harsh, dark with lust.

Jason had called me on my bullshit while we were shooting pool tonight and I knew he was right. It was time to do this. She was ready, beyond ready. I took my shirt off, my skin already feeling too hot. I pushed her little tank top up over her head and threw it behind me. Then I unbuttoned her little skinny jeans, pulling them down to her ankles. She lifted her foot to step out of them. My hand was flying toward her ass before I consciously decided to spank her. “I said, don’t fucking move, Leda.”

Her ankles were essentially secured, she was hobbled. I stood back, looking at her body. She wore a lacy black bra with matching boy-short panties. While those could be cute and had their uses, it wasn’t what I wanted. I wanted her to be wearing a thong. Or nothing at all. I wanted skin on skin when I spanked her ass. I pulled the shorts up, baring her ass for my hand.

“You were a brat tonight. You know that, right?”

She turned her face toward me, eyes shining with excitement as she murmured, “Yes, Boss.”

Sexual triumph washed over me. “You get a spanking. Ready?”

She sighed. “Oh, fuck yes.”

I actually stepped to the side so I could fully wind up. I was a few slaps in when the stupid panties started to slip.

I muttered, “Goddammit,” and grabbed them in the middle, yanking hard. I was rewarded with the satisfying sound of ripping and they sprang free of her body. Her cute little pussy was right there, all wet for me and I slammed my fingers into her. She gasped and moaned a little. I stepped away from her and grabbed her torn panties where I had dropped them.

I leaned across her body and jammed the panties into her mouth, gagging her. “Quiet, little one. If you need me to stop, stomp your foot.” I climbed on the bed and dropped my knee between her shoulder blades, but kept the other knee on the bed, so she wasn’t bearing my full weight.

I watched her for a moment, knowing this was intense and maybe too much. I was sick of controlling myself. She made me want to lose control. She made me feel alive in a way I hadn’t ever felt before. But then it happened, what I had known would happen at some point in our relationship.

She breathed deep through her nose and she relaxed under me. Chills ran across her skin. She arched her back, bending into a bow for me, her ass up in the air. I grabbed her offered up ass, and squeezed down hard. I saw the tears but she didn’t seem to be in distress. She moaned, all muffled by the gag. I took her bra off her. Then I waited, watching to see what she would do.

She shifted. Then shifted some more, and I dug my knee into her back and slapped her ass. Her cheeks were getting rosy. She whined against the gag, but stopped moving. I waited to be sure she was going to stay where I put her. When I was convinced she would, I climbed off her and sat on the edge of the bed, next to her. I rested my arm on her low back and just skimmed a touch across her ass.

I stood up and pulled her up, leaning against my chest. “Climb onto the bed.” I whispered it in her ear, a promise that something more was coming. She moved, her jeans hampering her some, but it was fun to watch.

She knelt, facing away from me, and I pushed her over. She caught herself like I’d known she would. She stretched out flat and I lay down on top of her, driving the breath from her lungs. I brushed her hair aside, kissing the back of her shoulders. Then threatened her, “Leda, I am going to spend tonight torturing you until you’re crying for my cock. And when we’re done, we’ll deal with whatever your behavior was about at the bar tonight.”

Her eyes watered and she subtly shifted her ass up some. She started trembling a little, and I whispered, more for her benefit than mine, “God, I like fucking with you.”

I stood up to pull her jeans off her feet and brushed my fingertips along her thighs, noting the sticky dampness with a smile. She pumped her pelvis into the mattress a little. “Turn over.” She flipped herself, immediately. I dropped down, my face in hers, and said, “If you keep moving like that, I will completely tie you up.”

I ran my fingers over her skin, pausing at her nipples to pinch and pull them. She moaned again and I clamped down harder. She moaned again. I felt my face going blank the way it did when I played hard, much harder than this. I let go of her nipple and ran my hand over her skin, to her pussy. I played with her and pulled at her well-groomed patch of hair a little. She sighed and closed her eyes when my fingers dipped between her lips and started teasing her. Her breath came deeper and I knew she liked it, so I pressed directly into her clit. Her eyes popped open and she screamed into the gag.

Delicious
. My psyche was a dark motherfucker.

I watched her reaction as I started finger-fucking her. She was shaking. She wanted to move. Her eyes started to water again and she reached for me. I continued the rhythm in her pussy, but she grabbed at my free arm, begging without words.

I just reached up and grabbed her wrists in one hand and held them. There was no change to what I was doing to her. I wanted to make her crazy. I wanted her panting my name. I wanted her to keep breaking the rules so I could punish her more. I brushed her clit a few times. She moaned harder and shifted her hips. I raised an eyebrow at her, in question. And she moved again, spreading her thighs a little and grinding her hips up into me.
That was it, little one.
I smiled coldly at her.

“On your knees.”

She moved as soon as I spoke. She got up on her knees facing me at the foot of the bed.

“Spread your knees.”

She moved to obey, completely open to me—some purists call it
nadu
—unable to hide anything in this position.

“Very nice.”

I climbed onto the bed behind her and held a hip and the opposite shoulder, bending her forward. “I’m trying to decide what position I like you in best. I think this may be it.” I traced her spine from her head to her ass then pulled her asscheeks apart to see her asshole. She was nervous about it and her muscles twitched. Her breathing came deep and shuddery. I touched the core of her shame and she puckered up, perfectly. I got my fingers wet in her pussy, roughly. She gasped a bit at that, but then I turned my attention back to her backside for a moment more, letting her know that I’d use her however I wanted to.

I was on the edge of what I could handle, ready to give in and fuck her despite all my warnings. I grabbed her hips to pull her against me as I pushed back. She could feel my cock against her and she pushed back harder, offering herself to me, then twisting for more friction.

“Really, little girl? You want this?”

She nodded her head hard and moaned.

“Really? Well, not enough.” I pulled away from her at the harsh words and slapped her ass again. She dropped to the bed and huffed out a breath. I smacked her ass more lightly this time, saying, “Settle down,” dismissively. She repositioned herself how she was supposed to be.

I leaned into her again and pushed against her, relishing her nudity and the next level of degradation it represented. She was exposed and I was still decent—
decent? No
. It was actually a technique I’d learned in the military. Slowly take things away from the prisoner—one thing at time, until they have nothing left. She had no clothes, couldn’t move if I didn’t want her to, couldn’t speak. She had nothing but wanting me.