Authors: Len Deighton
âLet's stop beating around the bush, shall we? The department has given me jobs from time to time. They do that with pensioned-off operatives because it keeps them signing the Act, and also because their pensions make them the most needy â and so the cheapest â people around.'
âCome back to London, Steve.'
âCan't you understand plain bloody King's English, Charlie? Either the girl is
not
dead, and the department have put her on ice in order to finger me â¦'
âOr?'
âOr she's dead and the department arranged it.'
âNo.'
âHow can you say no. Do they let you read the Daily Yellows?'
âIt's no good, Steve,' I said. âThe department would never do it this way and both of us know it.'
âThe confidence you show in those bastards â¦' said Champion. âWe know only a fraction of what goes on up there. They've told you that Melodie was a departmental employee â have you ever heard of her or seen any documents?'
âThe documents of an operative in the field? Of course I haven't.'
âExactly. Well, suppose I tell you that she was never an employee and the department have wanted her killed for the last three months. Suppose I told you that they ordered me to kill her, and that I refused. And that that was when the row blew up.'
âGo on,' I said.
âThe department made that contact for me. They said she was from the Palestinian terrorists. They told me that she was a nutty American student, the London contact for five hundred stolen Armalites and two tons of gelignite.' Champion was excited now and smiling nervously, as I remembered him from the old days.
He sipped his drink. âThey sent an American chap to see me. Is his name Schindler? Drinks that Underberg stuff, I remember. I wouldn't believe he was from the department at first. Then they sent a Mutual down to confirm him as OK. Is it Schroder?'
âSomething like that,' I said.
âHe mentioned the killing end. I didn't take him seriously at first. I mean, they must still have special people for that game, surely. But he was in earnest. Ten thousand pounds, he said. He had it all set up, too. He'd organized a flat in Barons Court stacked up with beer and whisky and cans of beans and soup. I'm telling you, it was equipped like a fall-out shelter. And he showed me this hypodermic syringe, killing wire and rubber gloves. Talk about horror movies, I needed a couple of big whiskies when I got out of there.' He drank some coffee. âAnd then I realized how I'd put my prints on everything he'd shown me.' He sighed. âNo fool like an old fool.'
âDid they pay the bill for the tweed jacket we found there?'
âThere was no reason to be suspicious,' said Champion. âThey told me to order the suits, and they paid for them. It was only when they sent a funny little man round to my place to take the labels and manufacturers' marks out of them that I began to worry. I mean ⦠can you think of anything more damning than picking up some johnny and then finding he's got no labels in his suits?'
âThere was money in the shoulder-pads,' I told him. âAnd documents, too.'
âWell, there you are. It's the kind of thing a desk-man would dream up if he'd never been at the sharp end. Wouldn't you say that, Charlie?'
I looked at Champion but I didn't answer. I wanted to believe him innocent, but if I discounted his charm, and the nostalgia, I saw only an ingenious man improvising desperately in the hope of getting away with murder.
âHow long ago are we talking about?' I said.
âJust a couple of weeks before I ran into you ⦠or rather you sought me out. That's why I wasn't suspicious that you were official. I mean, they could have found out whatever they needed to know through their normal contacts ⦠but that girl, she wasn't one of them, Charlie, believe me.'
âDid you tell her?'
âLike fun! This girl was trying to buy armaments â and not for the first time. She could take care of herself, believe me. She carried, too â she carried a big .38 in that crocodile handbag.' He finished his coffee and tried to pour more, but the pot was empty. âAnyway, I've never killed anyone in cold blood and I wasn't about to start, not for the department and not for money, either. But I reasoned that someone would do it. It might have been someone I liked a lot better than her. It might have been you.'
âThat was really considerate of you Steve,' I said.
He turned his head to me. The swelling seemed to have grown worse in the last half hour. Perhaps that was because of Champion's constant touches. The blue and red flesh had almost pushed his eye closed. âYou don't go through our kind of war, and come out the other end saying you'd never kill anyone, no matter what kind of pressure is applied.'
I looked at him for a long time. âThe days of the entrepreneur are over, Steve,' I told him. âNow it's the organization man who gets the Christmas bonus and the mileage allowance. People like you are called “heroes”, and don't mistake it for a compliment. It just means has-beens, who'd rather have a hunch than a computer output. You are yesterday's spy, Steve.'
âAnd you'd sooner believe those organization men than believe me?'
âNo good waving your arms, Steve,' I said. âYou're standing on the rails and the express just blew its whistle.'
He stared at me. âOooh, they've changed you, Charlie! Those little men who've promised you help with your mortgage, and full pension rights at sixty. Who would have thought they could have done that to the kid who fought the war with a copy of
Wage Labour and Capital
in his back pocket. To say nothing of that boring lecture you gave everyone about Mozart's revolutionary symbolism in “The Marriage of Figaro”.' He smiled, but I didn't.
âYou've had your say, Steve. Don't take the jury out into the back alley.'
âI hope you listened carefully then,' he said. He got to his feet and tossed some ten-franc notes on to the coffee tray. âBecause if you are only half as naïve as you pretend to be ⦠and if
you
have put your dabs all over some carefully chosen incriminating evidence â¦'
âGo on,' I said.
âThen it could be that London are setting us both up for that big debriefing in the sky.'
âYou've picked up my matches,' I said.
âYou'd sooner live in a dump than live in a nice home,' said Schlegel accusingly.
âNo,' I said, but without much conviction. I didn't want to argue with him.
He opened the shutters so that he could see the charcuterie across the alley. The tiny shop-window was crammed with everything from shredded carrot to pig feet. Schlegel shuddered. âYes, you would,' he insisted. âRemember that fleapit you used to have in Soho. Look at that time we booked you into the St Regis, and you went into a cold-water walk-up in the Village. You like dumps!'
âOK,' I said.
âIf this place had some kind of charm, I'd understand. But it's just a flophouse.' For a long time he was silent. I walked across to the window and discovered that he was staring into the first-floor window across the alley. A fat woman in a frayed dressing-gown was using a sewing machine. She looked up at Schlegel, and when he did not look away she closed her shutters. Schlegel turned and looked round the room. I'd put asters, souci and cornflowers into a chipped tumbler from the washbasin. Schlegel flicked a finger at them and the petals fell. He went over to the tiny writing table that wobbled unless something was wedged under one leg. My Sony radio-recorder almost toppled as Schlegel tested the table for stability. I had turned the volume down as Schlegel had entered, but now the soft sounds of Helen Ward, and Goodman's big band, tried to get out. Schlegel pushed the âoff' button, and the music ended with a loud click. âThat phone work?' he asked.
âIt did this morning.'
âCan I give you a word of advice, fella?'
âI wish you would,' I told him.
For a moment I thought I'd offended him, but you don't avoid Schlegel's advice that easily. âDon't stay in places like this, pal. I mean ⦠sure, you save a few bucks when you hit the cashier's office for the price of a hotel. But jeeze ⦠is it worth it?'
âI'm not hitting the cashier's office for the price of anything more than I'm spending.'
His face twisted in a scowl as he tried to believe me. And then understanding dawned. âYou came in here, in the sub, in the war. Right? I remember now: Villefranche â it's a deep-water anchorage. Yeah. Sure. Me too. I came here once ⦠a long time ago on a flat-top, with the Sixth Fleet. Nostalgia, eh?'
âThis is where I first met Champion.'
âAnd the old doll downstairs.' He nodded to himself. âShe's got to be a hundred years old ⦠she was the radio operator ⦠the Princess! Right?'
âWe just used this as a safe-house for people passing through.'
âIt's a brothel!' Schlegel accused.
âWell, I don't mind that so much,' I told him. âThe baker next door waves every morning when I leave. This morning, he winked.'
âWouldn't you rather be in a hotel?'
âWell, I'm going to ask the Princess if the girls could be a little quieter with the doors.'
âBanging all night?' said Schlegel archly.
âExactly,' I said.
âA cat house,' mused Schlegel. âA natural for an escape chain. But the Nazis had them high on the check-out list.'
âWell, we won the war,' I said sharply. Schlegel would get in there, checking out the syntax of my dreams, if he knew the way.
âI'll call Paris,' he said.
âI'd better tell the Princess.'
âDo we have to?'
âWe have to,' I said. âUnless you want her interrupting you to tell you how much it's costing, while you're talking to the Elysée Palace.'
Schlegel scowled to let me know that sarcasm wasn't going to help me find out who he was phoning. âExtension downstairs, huh?'
I went to the door and yelled down to the bar, at which the Princess was propped with
Salut les Copains
and a big Johnny Walker. âI'm calling Paris,' I shouted.
âYou called Paris already today, chéri,' she said.
âAnd now we're calling again, you old bag,' growled Schlegel, but he took good care to keep his voice down. Already she'd made him apologize to one of the bar girls for saying goddamn.
âThat's right,' I told her.
âJust as long as you don't forget the money you're spending, my darling.'
âDarleeeng,' growled Schlegel. âWill you believe that's the first hearing-aid I've seen with sequins on it?'
He picked up his plastic case, put it on the bed and opened it. At first glance it might have been mistaken for a portable typewriter, permanently built into its case. It was the newest model of acoustic coupler. Schlegel began typing on the keys.
I said, âAnything fresh on the girl? Body been found, or anything?'
Schlegel looked up at me, sucked his teeth and said, âI'll ask them what Missing Persons knows.' When Schlegel finished typing his message he dialled the Paris number. He gave his real name. I suppose that was to save all the complications that would arise if he was phoning from a hotel that held his passport. Then he said, âLet's scramble,' and put the phone handpiece into the cradle switch inside the case. He pressed the âtransmit' button and the coupler put a coded version of what he'd typed through the phone cables at thirty or forty characters a second. There was a short delay, then the reply came back from the same sort of machine. This time Schlegel's coupler decoded it and printed it on to tape in âplain English'. Schlegel read it, grunted, pushed the âmemory erase' button and rang off.
âYou ask those guys the
time
, and they'd tell you what trouble they're having from the Records Office,' he said. He burned the tape without showing it to me. It was exactly the way the textbook ordered but it didn't make me want to open my heart to him about Champion's version of the girl's death.
But I told him everything Champion had said.
âHe's right,' said Schlegel. âHe knows we wouldn't be pussyfooting around if we had the evidence. Even if he enters the UK I doubt whether the department would let us hold him.'
âHe must have killed the girl,' I said, with some hesitation.
âHe didn't collect that shiner by walking into a lamppost.'
I nodded. Champion's bruised face was just the sort of blow he might have suffered while overpowering the girl. And the two scratches on his cheek were just like the damage to the wallpaper near the bed. No matter how much I tried to push the idea away, Champion's guilt bobbed up again like a plastic duck.
âYou tell me Champion was some kind of master spy,' Schlegel said. âWell, I'm telling you he's a loser. So far he's fouled up every which way, so I'm not joining the fan club. Champion is a creep, an over-confident creep, and if he steps out of line we'll clobber him, but good!'
âThat's the way it looks,' I agreed.
âYou're telling me it's all a set-up?'
I shrugged. âThat's one of the new couplers, is it?'
Schlegel stroked the metal case that was intended to make it look like a cheap typewriter. âI can plug that baby into any computer with terminals. Last week I used the CIA
TELCOM
from a call-box, and tomorrow I'll abstract from the London Data Bank.'
âLondon will ring you back?'
âBut not here. Not secure enough. That old doll downstairs ⦠no, I'll have to get going.'
âMeet her,' I said. âOtherwise I'll get endless questions.'
âOne drink,' he said.
âYou could be right ⦠about Champion, I mean. People change.'
We picked our way down the narrow creaking staircase before the time-switch plopped. I opened the door marked âNo Entry' and went through it into the bar.