You Can't Run From Love (22 page)

“Not the needle and thread type.”

“You’re quite the wimp, aren’t you?”

Jess nodded with a sheepish grin. The eyes locked with hers were hypnotizing, but no matter how heavy Jess’s became, she couldn’t close them.

“I’m sorry, Jess. I’m so very sorry for what I said this morning.”

The anguish in Rachel’s eyes was so apparent Jess reached up and cupped her cheek. “You’d had a fright. It doesn’t matter. I know you didn’t really mean it.”

Rachel sighed. “It does matter. I lashed out and upset you. Jess, I have a lot to apologize for.” She placed her hand over Jess’s. “We need to talk.”

Margaret entered, pushing a trolley. “That leg of yours will need a rest and so will you.” She looked at Jess. “Mind you, there’s nothing to say it can’t sit through a Halloween party tomorrow evening though, weather permitting.”

Rachel and Jess looked at her and said in unison, “What?”

Chapter Twenty-Nine

Jess lay in bed, feeling content. It was a far cry from the previous night when her exhausted mind had gone over the rescue and speculated over what Rachel might say.

Earlier in the evening, the occupants of Lomond Lodge and the house had ventured down to Bill’s annual Halloween party after a very lazy day. Every year, weather permitting, there was a bonfire in the pub’s back garden overlooking the river. Tables, benches and log burners were strategically placed around the extensive grounds. And the food was cooked outside on spits and barbeques. It was always a wonderful end to a busy season.

The day had been a beautiful one, after the deluge of rain the day before. The fire took a bit of persuading and a little extra fuel was needed to get it started, but eventually it roared into life and the night got underway. After eating with the others, Jess and Rachel wandered down to the river and only had to walk a short distance from the revelers to find a secluded bench with a wood burner glowing next to it. Jess chuckled to herself.
How convenient.

Rachel had talked and Jess had listened. Rachel hadn’t wanted to make Michelle an excuse for her behavior; she could have chosen to act differently. It became transparent to Jess as she continued to explain, that she lacked confidence when it came to sex, something Jess was already aware of, but she let her continue. Her trust in women, though, was nonexistent and Jess hadn’t helped in that department at all. Despite that, Jess was pleased to hear Rachel say that the not-so-good parts of their relationship appeared so low due to the fact the highs were so good. She wasn’t entirely sure she should be pleased, but she was.

All Rachel was saying she could relate to and understand where they had both gone wrong or misunderstood, except for one thing. What had happened the last time they had made love? Rachel had reiterated it was her mistrust, perceiving something to have happened that hadn’t. She dismissed it as unimportant. Jess thought otherwise.

Rachel sighed. “Jess, would you allow a person to do something to you that you didn’t want?”

“No, I wouldn’t. Why?”

“I’m glad. You are a more honorable woman than I am.”

To Jess, the look in Rachel’s eyes showed she was someplace she didn’t want to be. Rachel smiled wistfully. “I’ve spent most of my life thinking there was something wrong with me. I felt I lacked passion and a need for intimacy. I didn’t enjoy lovemaking. I went through the motions and sometimes I could talk myself into enjoying it, just so that it wouldn’t hurt.”

“What do you mean, so that it wouldn’t hurt?” Jess gripped her arm. “How could she not know? Some things you can’t hide.” Jess pulled Rachel gently to her. “I’m sorry. I wouldn’t make a very good counselor would I?”

Rachel relaxed and settled into the safety of the arms around her. Jess knew exactly who she was talking about. “I learned how to make it easier, by fantasizing. It worked most of the time. You’re right though, she did know it hurt at times.” She let out a deep sigh. “But I didn’t stop her either.”

Tears welled in Jess’s eyes. How could anyone treat such a wonderful woman so badly?

Rachel felt a tear trickle down her neck. “You’ll probably find this hard to believe. I actually saw a therapist too, after my breakup with Michelle.” She chuckled nervously. “Not that it appears to have done me any good, whatsoever.” She looked up. “I come across the one person who gives me everything and I do my utmost to drive her away.”

Jess smiled. “It’ll take a lot more than your cold shoulder treatment to get rid of me now.” She took Rachel’s hand. “I think I’ve guessed what happened that afternoon.” Pink colored Jess’s face. “You might not find this easy to believe—I’ve never actually had anyone inside me.”

Rachel gave a short gasp. “You had every right to stop me then.” She grinned, more from relief than anything else. “But, you’re right. I do find it difficult to believe that God’s sexual gift to women has never let anyone slip these inside her.” She wiggled both her eyebrows and two fingers for effect and it worked. Jess turned the color of beetroot. “Well stud, what’s your excuse?”

“I usually find my pleasure in pleasuring others, that’s more than enough for me. I like to be the one in control.”

Rachel’s smile grew serious. “I should have asked permission, as you did.”

“I don’t always ask permission. There isn’t always a need. With you, what you wanted and didn’t want was important to me.”

“That should have been important to me too.”

Jess chuckled. “You did ask. I said you could do anything. I was so turned on I was incapable of any coherent thought.”

Rachel relaxed. “I can’t believe I could get something so wrong.” She looked into gleaming blue eyes that reassured her she didn’t. “Jess, can we try and start from the beginning again?”

It wasn’t quite what Jess wanted to hear, but she smiled, at least it wasn’t a brush-off this time. As they stood to return to the others, Jess looked at Rachel and asked, even if it was to be their last, “Can I kiss you?”

“I thought you were never going to ask.”

As she closed her eyes to sleep, she relived that kiss.

Chapter Thirty

“Good morning. You two are up early.” Jess beamed as she sat down at the breakfast table. “Something smells good.”

The older residents of the house grinned at each other before they replied in chorus, “Good morning.” Marie then excused herself to get washed and dressed.

Jack said, “I have some news regarding tomorrow.” Jess looked at her uncle. Tomorrow was the day they would all be traveling down to London for Rachel’s book signing event. “I know it’s short notice, but I’ve decided it would be best not to go.”

She was both relieved and disappointed. Pleased, as she thought the whole thing was a bad idea in the first place, yet upset that she wouldn’t be spending the weekend with Rachel.

Jack smiled as if reading her mind. “The only reason I was going was so that you and Rachel would spend time together, and not make the break, an excuse to part company, forever.”

She frowned. “Oh.”

“Marie and I are more than capable of looking after the lodges and ourselves.”

“Okay. If Rachel’s still happy for me to go, then I will.”

***

Jess accepted a glass of wine from the likable, stocky, dark-haired woman. Diane was everything Margaret had so lovingly described. “Thank you. You have a splendid home. The ceiling rose in my bedroom is amazing.”

Diane smiled. “It is isn’t it? I think it’s the best one in the house. I hope you have everything you need. Margaret gave me strict instructions.”

“It’s perfect. When did you actually get back?”

Diane indicated for her to sit. “The day before yesterday. I’m glad I could escape in time for the book signing. It’s going to be an important day for Rachel. The whole thing has just grown and grown.”

Jess fidgeted a little apprehensively. “I’m not sure I’ve been to anything like tomorrow night’s party.” She laughed. “In fact, I know I haven’t.”

“You’ll be fine, just be yourself. If I can get by in those things, you most definitely will. Margaret said you were a charming woman and that’s all you need to be to survive one of these events.” She winked. “And unfortunately, I have to agree and I don’t like to do that too often.”

Jess blushed. “You both must have agreed on Rachel. You all seem very close.”

“Rachel is a lovely person, very easy to like. Yet, she has been let down by many people close to her. Even we’ve had our moments.”

“Well, I’m glad she has the two of you, despite those.” Jess smiled.

***

The rest of evening went well and Jess had been made to feel very comfortable. Despite the time the three women had known each other, they had included her wholeheartedly.

It wasn’t a late night due to traveling and the early start for Rachel in the morning, but Jess couldn’t help feeling disappointed with the outcome as the two of them made their way to their own bedrooms. She was more than happy, though, to take things slowly if that’s what Rachel wanted. She just needed to practice a little patience. She smiled as she heard Rachel puttering around in their adjoining bathroom. After hanging the last of her items in the wardrobe, she removed her shoes and socks and waited on her bed for Rachel to finish.

“It’s all yours.” She quickly sat up in the hope Rachel would pop in, but she didn’t. The other door was slightly ajar when she padded through to clean her teeth. She then called, “Good night.”

“Jess?”

She stopped at the sound of her name and tentatively pushed the door so she could look into the room. “Yes?”

“Would you like to sleep in here, with me?”

Jess just stared, her eyes darkening. “Sleep would be the farthest thing from my mind.”

Rachel suddenly felt a damp throb at her center. She took a step forward. “What’s the nearest thing?”

“This.” She took Rachel’s lips with her own. It began slow and sensuous, but before long, lips and tongues danced feverishly.

Rachel could feel their bodies pulling and pressing harder together. Hands started to roam freely and Rachel became keenly aware she was being guided slowly toward the bed, her clothes being discarded piece by piece.

Out of breath and incredibly aroused, Jess was on the verge of climaxing. She pulled away and found herself straddling a naked Rachel. The eyes that looked up at her showed obvious need and surprise, even annoyance at the sudden withdrawal. Jess stared at the heaving breasts before her and muttered to herself, “How does she do this to me?”

Rachel blinked twice, trying to make sense of the quietly spoken words. “Do what?”

Jess was drowning in the woman beneath her. “What?”

Focusing on the blue dilated pools Rachel repeated. “What do I do to you?”

Jess looked puzzled and then smiled. “Did I say that out loud?”

Rachel pulled at her shirt, suddenly feeling a little self-conscious that the woman on top of her was still fully clothed. “Yes, unless I can read your mind.”

“I’m reading yours.” Jess lifted the garment over her head.

Rachel groaned at the sight of the toned form, as it lifted itself from the bed, removed all other remaining items hurriedly and returned to the straddling position.

Jess watched the brown eyes darken and glass over, fixing themselves on her breasts. Pulling her vision away, she admired every inch of the body glowing and subtly writhing between her legs. She lowered her head and grasped a nipple between her lips, pulling and teasing, before slowly kissing her way up to Rachel’s ear. “What do you want?”

Rachel’s breath hitched, the words tickling. She was so turned on she didn’t know what she wanted. She just wanted this woman to touch her. “Oh Jess, don’t torture me please.”

“I don’t want to torture you, just tell me what you want.”

Rachel felt the body radiating heat above her slide down and press against her side. Next, she felt a hand brush over her breast and capture a nipple. Involuntarily, she rolled closer. “Please Jess, I need...”

“What do you need?”

Rachel lifted her hips as Jess lifted slightly over her and slipped a thigh between her legs. “Inside, I want to feel you inside.”

Jess was delirious with desire. The moisture she felt as she pressed her thigh into Rachel’s center was driving her senseless, now those words. She had to concentrate hard on providing exactly what Rachel needed. “Yes. Yes.”

Rachel couldn’t believe how desperate she felt. A hand was slowly and gently dancing down her body when she wanted it to hurry. It seemed like an eternity before it finally reached where she wanted it to be. She bucked, needing to come, yet the hand stroked teasingly, as if waiting for her to beg. As she rhythmically moved her hips, fingers slipped inside. She stiffened, waiting for the impending movement that would give her release, but it never came. Almost immediately, Jess’s breathing increased and she moaned. Rachel squealed, “Stop.”

It took Jess a moment, but she withdrew. “What, sorry, what have I done?” Panic in her voice.

Rachel sucked in a deep breath, pressing herself against the thigh still resting between hers. “Nothing, I need to touch you.”

Jess’s body was on fire, she wanted to take this woman in so many ways, and she just couldn’t get enough of her. “No, I’ll climax.”

Rachel’s eyes dilated. “I know. That’s what I want. Both of us, at the same time, please. As soon as you make that one move inside me, I won’t last.”

Jess pulled Rachel over onto her side, caressing her back and kneading the soft buttocks, allowing her access to slide a hand between her thighs. Jess let out a deep guttural sigh at the touch. She was so close. Holding her breath in an attempt to control the inevitable, she whispered smiling, “I’m going in.” Her fingers slid through Rachel’s drenched and swollen folds.

“Oh yes.”

As she moved rhythmically against Rachel and pushed deeper with her fingers, she heard, “Oh Jess, please, yes.” Instantly a hand pressed and rubbed firmly over her clitoris as Rachel lifted her own hips off the bed in urgency. “Oh…”

Jess simultaneously felt her own center pulsate and moved in unison with the waves that gripped her fingers. “Oh yes…”