Young Annabelle Series: Young Annabelle, the Truth About James, What My Heart Wants (8 page)

I laughed, thinking about my mom walking around the neighborhood proudly sporting the t-shirt, a huge grin on her face.

That feels better!

I had a new smile on my face that I desperately needed before diving into James’ texts. I tapped on his name. Four messages popped up, one after the other.

Tiger
6:00pm:
Hey you there?

That’s it?

Yes I’m here!

But I’m gonna need a bit more than that if you want me to text back, DOUCHE!

Tiger 6:28pm:
R u ignoring me? Because of Donna? Fireball, you know it wasn’t like that!

I shook my head.

Wrong again.

First of all, it wasn’t entirely about Donna, second of all, you’re a spoiled little brat who thinks his shit doesn’t stink. Some of us have to work, unlike you.

Tiger 6:46pm:
Fireball! Don’t ignore me :( It was nothing. We were just talking about nothing

Then why was she blushing like you just told her something dirty?

I’m not stupid!

I mouthed ‘Whatever’ to the screen and checked the next message.

Tiger 7:25pm:
Wow, so its gonna be like that huh!

What the hell did he want from me!

He was the one who walked away from me!

Yeah, so I’d told him I had to get back to work, but he didn’t have to agree right away and return to the attention-whore!

Not cool!

I tapped ‘reply’ on the newest message. I was going to give him a piece of my mind.

Annabelle 7:45pm:
That’s right its gonna be like that. I don’t owe u anything. We don’t even know each other! Get over yourself, it wasn’t about DONNA! Some of us aren’t as lucky as you, we still have to work! Remember that the next time you decide to gloat!

I pressed ‘send’ and threw the phone onto my bed.

BOOM
!

That’s what’s up, douchebag!

My phone beeped.

If I was honest with myself, I was a bit scared to pick up my phone, like it would burn me if I touched it.

New Message from
Tiger!

I reluctantly opened his text.
Here goes nothing.

Tiger 7:47pm:
Oh yeah! U need to have your ears checked, I didn’t gloat! Weren’t you the one who tried to lock lips with me? Stop lying to urself. It was about Donna, jealous I was talking to her and not you.
From your hot studded fantasy

Oh my God, he did not just write that!

I almost kissed him?!

Was he kidding?

I wasn’t
jealous!

I threw my phone back onto my bed, it bounced and landed on my pillow. My body felt like it was in flames. I struggled out of my sweater and whipped it across the room. It didn’t make me feel any better.

I grabbed my black sweater from my closet, its zippered pockets were perfect for carrying my iPod. I shoved my arms through the sleeves and placed my iPod in the pocket, pulling out my headphones as I closed my bedroom door behind me.

“I’m going biking!” I yelled from the front door.

“You’re going to exercise?!” Mom exclaimed from the basement. “That’s wonderful, Annabelle, I’m so proud of you!”

Maybe some exercise will help clear my mind!

CHAPTER
6

August 21
st,
2012

“Go Jenna!” I screamed from the top of the bleachers at the Royal Heights High pool.

It had been three whole weeks since I last saw or spoke with James.

Like I care!
I reminded myself, turning my attention back to the mock swim meet. The team’s first competition was scheduled for the end of September. Jenna had quit the club a week ago to focus on the new training schedule.

She is so getting that scholarship!

I beamed like a proud parent as Jenna brought it home for her relay team, finishing off her freestyle with a quick tap on the wall. Losing her at work and pretending not to care about James’ absence had turned working at the club into pure torture.

Like I care
d if I saw his  – very cute – ass anymore…

I shook my head and laughed at the realization
…that I was a fraud!

Damn it.
I exhaled a long, slow breath. I thought my body and mind had reached an understanding, but thoughts of James had been plaguing me since he left. I’d been tormented by these stupid, inexplicable feelings every time my mind drifted to something even remotely linkable to him.

Need a boyfriend. Like, now!

What was happening to me?

All of a sudden I’d become a desperate horn-dog!

Maybe I’d have a boyfriend able to suppress these out-of-control feelings if people weren’t always on my ass about my appearance, destroying any remnant of confidence I possessed.

How could I snag a man if I never believed I was good enough?

According to Jenna, I was cute. And I was sure there was a guy out there who wouldn’t mind his girl having a little junk in the trunk.

I was
sure he’s out there…somewhere…

The buzzer rang loudly, signally that the meet was over. I looked d
own the bottom of the bleachers, Jenna’s parents were sitting with the other parents, all abuzz with excitement.

A pang of jealously shot thro
ugh me. They were wearing the t-shirts her dad had ordered: his in blue, hers in pink. Her dad jumped from his seat to enthusiastically applaud his daughter’s victory.

“Yeah! Jenna, my
baby girl!” He fist-pumped the air then nudged his wife to join in on his embarrassing display of affection.

Jenna’s mom laughed and put her arm up in a haphazard attempt at a fist-pump. He laughed and grabbed her arm, shaking it to match his own excitement. As soon as he released her arm, she dropped it to her side, shaking her head at the mother seated beside her.

“I can’t bring him anywhere,” She smiled, unashamed. This was an everyday thing for her and she clearly loved him for it.

I let out another long breath and headed down the bleachers. As I passed Jenna’s parents, they told me to tell Jenna not to take an hour to change. I chuckled, knowing exactly what they meant.

“I’ll try,” I promised and headed into the hall to the alternate entrance to the change rooms. That was the only way I could enter because I had street shoes on.

“Fireball?” 

I froze.

Nervousness consumed my body. I was only ‘Fireball’ to one person.

I hesitantly turned around. James was walking down the hallway towards me. His dark hair, normally so messy, was damp and slicked back.

He’d obviously just had a shower.

Do not go there!

Annabelle, for Christ’s sake,
DO not go there… Shower…James…God!

My mouth went as dry as the Sahara as he came closer. With his hair combed back, I could see more of his beautiful –
stop it!
– face, and his green eyes…
Damn!

Why did
he have to be so good looking?

I had to calm down or he’d think I was some jittering freak.

“Hey,” I said nonchalantly – or did my best to, at least.

Play it cool, don’t let him see he affects you, at all.

“What are you doing here, come to watch me practice?” He smirked and folded his arms across his tightly-shirted chest.

Sigh...
I mean, hell no!

Shaking out of the brief imagining of muscles and how his tight shirt would look so much better on the ground, I took a step back and did my best to seem bewildered at the audacity of his claim.

“You need to get over yourself,” I scowled.

“Why would I? I don’t see you running away. Guess you’re not as offended as you think you are,” James stated smugly.

My light brown eyes widened at his comment. “What?”

“Be honest, you miss me!” He smirked again, taking a step closer.

My heart was beating like crazy. “I don’t!” I took another step back, keeping the distance between us.

“Then why are you here? It’s still summer, beautiful. School doesn’t start for another few weeks.” His grin got wider, thinking he’d got me.

And he kind of did.

The way he looked at me was making me sweat…..

Calling me ‘BEAUTIFUL’ was a whole new level….GOD!

I’m beautiful!
I gushed silently, feeling a joy reserved only for Christmas and birthdays.

Be on your guard, girl.

He knows what he’s doing!

I tried to shake it off, realizing he probably thought he had me in his pocket.
He did, sort of, but I had to put a stop to it.

I leaned towards him.

“I’m here to see my best friend swim in a mock meet,” I explained. “So go screw yourself!”

His jaw clenched tightly and the warmth in his green eyes seeped away, leaving a stony coolness.

“I wish I could, but it’s usually better if there’s two people doing it,” James responded.

Don’t fall for it…..
he’s playing you!

I stood silently.

It took me a moment to register the words pouring out of his –
sigh –
beautiful mouth. Then, like lightening, it all came crashing down, making sense.

Was he…did he mean us?

Doing it?!

Like together?

I felt my cheeks heat at a rate that would burst a thermometer.

“I’ve got to go,” I muttered, swallowing my heart back down.

My brain was slowly…..turning to mush.

I had to get away from him.

James nodded, his expression unchanging. My body now felt incredibly drunk. With my brain, too incapacitated to send a signal down to my sluggish legs to turn and walk away, the time to move, was now.

I
regained control and pushed into the girls’ change room. I stopped between the outer and inner doors, resting against the wall for a moment as I composed myself. My heart rate needed to
slow way down
if I had any hope of forgetting what just happened, especially if I had to explain it to Jenna.

There was a mirror with a counter along one wall of the little hallway between the two doors.
I faced the mirror, preparing to check my reflection to see how bad the damage was. If it was anything like how I felt at that moment, it would not be good. But, I was hopeful.

Please…not a disaster!

Carefully, I opened my eyes. All I saw was red.

I was literally
red
.

Shit!

I was horrified as I examined the shade of my cheeks. Thankfully, my hair was fine except for the beads of sweat that threatened to ruin the flat-ironing job I’d put my long strands through this morning.

Jesus!
I could walk twenty minutes in the blistering heat then sit in the sauna-like pool area, and not sweat like I was now.

What wa
s he doing to me?!

It’s like I’
d never see a cute – okay, really hot – guy before!

I shook my head.
I was confused at my body’s weird reaction to him. I wiped the beads of sweat off my forehead and stared at my reflection. My pupils looked dilated – honestly, I looked like I’d just gone through the biggest shock of my life.

You know why you feel like this
, I explained to myself,
’cause he brought up having sex with him.

I clung to the counter for support, trying to control my breathing. The thought of doing anything like that with James was sending
me into sweaty tremors.

The sound of excitement and shouting come from beyond the inner door.

Jenna!
I suddenly remembered why I was here. I threw off the lust-filled tremors and glanced at the mirror one last time. My cheeks had regained some of their original color.

I pushed open the door to look for Jenna and congratulate her.

*~*~*

It was late afternoon by the time Jenna and her parents left the school for a celebratory dinner. They’d invited me to come but I graciously declined, telling them I had to eat at home tonight. I didn’t mention that Mom would blow a gasket if I had dinner at a restaurant for the second time this month. As far as she was concerned, the
‘pass day’ was a one-time indulgence. And she had made it irritatingly clear how much she regretted it every day for the past three weeks, always complaining that she didn’t understand how she’d let it happen.

Let it happen? That’s a laugh! Oh, it would have happened,
I thought, recalling how the only thing that had kept me from cracking into a hysterical fit of angry tears was the pasta from Luigi’s.

Don’t think about pasta.

My stomach grumbled at the delicious reminder of rich tomato sauce over beautifully cooked pasta.

Damn it!

I was walking back home after declining Jenna’s dinner invitation. I regretted saying no, especially when I realized what I’d be getting for dinner tonight: salad again, and steamed fish with lemon, ugh!

I turned to the patch of grass next to the sidewalk and kicked it. I was beyond frustrated and the only thing here to kick the shit out of was someone’s front lawn.

Damn it, my entire summer had been horrible!

From working under Shelby and meeting James only to realize he was a cocky asshole, to Jenna quitting work to train and spend all her time with the swim team. And the nasty cherry on top was this freaking diet I
was being forced to do.

During my SUMMER!

When was I going to have any fun?

Wasn’t summer supposed to be fun?

I
glanced around the neighborhood. I’d been walking on autopilot. I was only a few blocks away from the best plaza, featuring all kinds of entertainment and shopping.

The movie theatre!

I hadn’t been to the movies once this summer. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to go, it was Mom’s paranoia about me possibly eating popcorn and drinking a regular Coke that drove her to plead for me not to go. I didn’t have energy to fight anymore, nor the will, so I gave in to her ridiculous request about skipping the movies for a while.

Well not now!

I decided then and there that I was going to watch a freaking movie.

With popcorn.

And
a regular Coke.

I was determined, for the first time this was summer
, I was going to enjoy it.

I texted Mom, telling her that the meet was running long and that I’d be home in a couple of hours.

Not surprisingly, she responded with:

Mom:
Don’t eat anything. Dinner will be waiting!

Jesus, it’s always about the food with her.

Wa
s it ever going to be about, like, if I was safe or not?

As soon as I hit Main Street, I was visually attacked by the traffic – it was insane! I entered the expansive parking lot
, the only empty spots were the ones furthest away from the stores. There were cars everywhere, trying to get a closer parking spot. It was looking more like some new sporting event than a parking lot. I was glad to be on the safe sidewalk. But soon crowds of people replaced the aggressive cars.

I paused for a moment to look around and the crowd bumped its way by, almost taking me along unwillingly.

I wandered passed a few clothing stores and shoe stores that I wanted to check out later, after I received my next pay. I’d allocated a certain amount for back to school shopping and couldn’t wait to get started.

I stopped in front of
Mark Theatres
. It was the biggest theatre complex I’d ever seen. Truly amazing. I rejoiced at the sight of the massive structure before entering the box office.

Here’s to taking control.
I mentally clinked glasses with myself.

Smiling, I examined the show times, hoping there was a movie starting soon. Unfortunately, the only one about to start was a horror.