Yours Book 2: Gaining Experience (Yours Series) (10 page)

She was gorgeous. Her smile seemed to light up the whole picture. I could tell that she was tall from the man she was standing next to in the picture. Her hair was shoulder length and blonde. Her eyes were dark and almost haunting despite her warm smile. Everything about her drew me into her presence in the photo.

To know now that she and Nick were involved is like a punch to my gut. At least, that is what I fear he is trying to tell me. That he and that stunning woman were together. I start to compare all of my shortcomings to this woman. A woman that no longer exists.

Would Nick be with her if she were still alive? She knew him when he was in college, so she was older, closer to his age than I am. Am I some sad replacement for the love of his life?

“I see the wheels turning in your head, Baby,” Nick says and presses his lips. “Let me tell you everything before you jump to conclusions. I will tell you this first, however, my love. You are and always will be the love of my life. I have never loved another the way I love you. So no matter what I am about to tell you, know that you hold my heart and I am forever, totally and truly yours.”

Nick pauses to let his words sink in. I absorb them and let the tension release from my body. I nod my head in understanding and prompt him to continue.

Nick releases a heavy sigh. “Wyatt dragged us all to a club one night and Ivana grabbed my attention right away. I admired her boldness when she came to me and pulled me onto the dance floor. I was different then. I let her take the lead.

“After that night, Ivana became one of the guys, but she and I were more. She was two years older than I was, but she never treated me like some kid. Instead, she helped me find my way out of my shell. Ivana could be mysterious at times, but it was one of the things I liked about her.

“My father started to become more demanding. I would vent to Ivana about my father wanting me to take over the business. One night, she talked me and the guys into joining her at this club. She said it was different and she thought we would all find an outlet for some of the things we were going through.

“By this point we all shared most of each other’s secrets. Ivana knew we all had pressure coming down on us from home. This was her way of offering us control,” Nick chuckles and shakes his head.

“If you would have told me that my girlfriend was taking me and my crazy group of friends to a BDSM club I would have looked at you like you were crazy. I was livid at first, but curiosity won out in the end.

“Won’t get into the specifics of that time in my life, but you have to understand that I found myself in the life. I found my voice. I was ready to tell my father that I wanted to do my own thing. I found my confidence and I channeled it all into moving forward to make my own path. That is until forces unknown to me started to interfere with my life.”

Nick scowls deeply and his jaw works under his skin. I reach to cover his jaw and look him in the eyes. He closes his eyes reining in his calm.

“I trusted Ivana. We all did. So when she came to me and told me she was pregnant, I thought nothing of it. I was twenty-two by then. We had been together since I was nineteen. I was pretty sure I was in love,” Nick shrugs.

“Until then I had kept Ivana and my family apart. I’m sure now that my father already knew about her, but as long as I wasn’t bringing her home he thought nothing of it. Well, I decided to take her home so my parents could meet the mother of my child.

“I had every intention of asking Ivana to marry me. My father and mother lost it. I’d never seen them behave the way they had. They were adamant that we get rid of the baby. My parents had never been like this with me. I was floored to see this side of them.

“Needless to say I took off and took the mother of my child with me. Like I said I’m a planner. I had been creating a little nest egg all along. I thought Ivana would be happy, but she kept pushing the subject of me getting back in my parent’s good graces.

“I brushed it off as her wanting my parents in the baby’s life. Our little girl wouldn’t have wanted for anything with or without my parents. I didn’t need to go running back to them. I just wanted to finish my senior year and move on with my life,” Nick’s jaw tightens and I can see he is getting to a part in the story that angers him.

“Ivana talked me and the guys into going on one last trip before the baby was born. So we all flew out to Daytona Beach for spring break. Ivana was five months by then so we spent most of our time in a private beach house.

“When we returned home my place was trashed. I had no idea what they were looking for. Nothing was missing. Kevin offered to have a friend wire my place with cameras and a security system. Mind you, I still didn’t know Kevin was a part of Briggs Security.

“Two weeks later, I just had this nagging feeling to pull up the feed and watch the footage from my apartment. I scrolled through for about an hour before I almost gave up, but something caught my attention.

“I forgot to tell Ivana about the security cameras. I found it odd when she walked into my office on her cell phone. She went through a few drawers and at first I thought she was looking for a pen maybe or something to write on. Only she pulled out a file and started going through it, but she stopped, stood, and began banging on the desk,” Nick stops once again, clenching and unclenching his fist.

“At that point I replayed the footage and turned on the sound to hear what was being said. I remember the feeling of the ice filling my veins as Ivana placed the phone on speaker and the other voice filled the room,” this time I can see that Nick is lost in the past as his words cut off and he looks off into the distance.

* * *

N
ick

I watched Ivana on the screen of my laptop wondering what she was doing. I’d been sitting here not even knowing why I decided to watch this footage. It had been nagging at me all night. Ivana decided to go out with some friends and I just wanted some time alone.

My father had been calling me all day pleading with my voicemail for me to call him. I wasn’t ready to call him. I still need time. I can’t believe Mom and Dad wanted me to kill my little girl and now…. I just don’t want to deal with whatever they want now.

In the video, Ivana sits at my desk and starts to rummage through the drawers. I lift my brows, watching as she lifts a file from the drawer. She starts to go through the file, then stops to bang on the desk I see her lips moving rapidly as her chest heaves. Pissed and curious now, I stopped the playback and restarted it from the point where Ivana entered the room, turning on the sound to listen in this time.

This time I watched Ivana more closely. I noticed that her hands are shaking as she starts to go through the drawers. There is a look of impatience on her face. Her dark eyes have a mix of sadness, frustration, and anger.

“I’m looking,” she growls into the phone at her ear. After a small pause, she speaks again. “I don’t know. You were supposed to do this. I gave you all the time you needed. You can’t blame this on me.”

I watched as Ivana shakes her head at what is said on the other end of the phone. She opens the bottom door and looks inside. With a frown, she pulls out a file. Placing it on the desk and removing the phone from her ear to place it on the desk as well, she starts moving through the file.

Suddenly, her lips part and she lifts to her feet slamming her hands on the desk. “I can’t do this. Why can’t you just leave him alone. I don’t understand why you are doing this,” Ivana yells. “If you have a problem with them, fine, but why drag Nick into this?”

“You stupid bitch. I’ve been paying you good money to stay close to him to get me what I need. I never paid you to fall in love with him or to get fucking pregnant. I should have left you where I found you. You have been nothing but trouble. The parents are on to you. Find what I need now,” the male voice growls into the phone.

I don’t recognize the voice, but it sends chills down my spine. My veins fill with ice and questions fill my head. I trusted Ivana. Has she been in my life for an ulterior motive all along? Who is the them Ivana mentioned? Could she be talking about my parents? What is this guy trying to drag me into?

I stopped the playback as fury consumed me. For the first time in a long time I felt out of control and I didn’t like it. I thought of the one person that may be able to help me find answers. I didn’t want to drag him into this, but I needed someone to help me get to the bottom of this.

S
ephora

H
e hasn’t said
a word for about five minutes now. I have sat here patiently waiting for him to come back from wherever he has disappeared to. I have so many questions, but they will have to wait. Right now I just want to understand the scowl on his face.

I won’t pretend to ignore the ping of hurt in my chest at knowing Nick has a daughter or that he was once going to marry her mother. I can’t help but wonder what happened to the little girl. This is the first I am hearing of her and there wasn’t any mention of her in the file as far as I know.

“Ivana betrayed my trust. I didn’t know what to do,” Nick says when he finally speaks. He goes on to tell me what happened when he watched the playback and heard the things Ivana and the man on the other end of the phone said.

My heart hurts for him. I can see the pain in his eyes and feel the despair that is rolling off of him. This is the most vulnerable I have ever seen Nick.

“I called the guys, Wyatt first. He was the one I knew could help me. I didn’t know then that I was putting all of my friends and their families in danger,” Nick swallows hard and shakes his head.

He snorts. “Whoever was after me decided to target more than just me. The more we started to dig the more we uncovered and that is when things got crazy.

“Ivana never returned that night, that I watched the video. I waited. We all did. She just fell off the grid. Wyatt even brought his brother in to see if we could find her. I was scared out of my mind. Yes, she betrayed me, but she was also carrying my little girl.”

Nick stops and pushes a hand through his hair. The hand that had been soothing my neck was now tense against me. I gently tug away to sit up and look at him.

I shiver when I am no longer encompassed in his warmth. Nick notices and frowns. He gets up and slides off the hood walking to the back of the car. Nick retrieves his leather jacket and brings it to wrap around my shoulders.

Nick plucks me off the hood and places me between his legs. Propping his butt against the car, he wraps his body around mine to keep me warm. I can feel the tension still running through him.

“You don’t have to finish telling me this. We can just try to enjoy the rest of the night,” I whisper softly, just loud enough for him to hear me.

Nick shakes his head in the crook of my neck. “No, I promised myself that I would get this out tonight. I want it over and done with. My priority is protecting you and starting our lives together as husband and wife. I can’t do that with this hanging over our heads.”

I gasp and spin in his arms. It is not the first time Nick has mentioned me being his wife, but there is something about the way he just said it that knocks the wind from me.

I cup his face and pull him to me for a kiss. Nick deepens the kiss sending a different type of shiver through me. I think I have effectively changed the topic and course of this evening until Nick breaks the kiss.

“I’m going to finish this conversation, Sephora,” Nick chuckles lightly. “When I get it all out I’ll take you home and we can spend the rest of the night making love.”

“Ugh, Nick, no matter what you tell me I am not leaving you. So you might as well get down on one knee and propose,” I huff and fold my arms over my chest.

Nick’s eyes darken with desire. They are almost completely black with no green in sight. His arms tighten around me tugging me closer to his chest.

“If you still want me after tonight, I will make that happen sooner rather than later,” Nick murmurs against my lips.

“Then please continue. I’d like to start planning my wedding,” I tease.

“Stop toying with me, Woman,” Nick growls capturing my lips for one more kiss.

“Are you sure I am toying with you,” I say breathlessly and smile.

“We shall see,” he replies as the playfulness from only a few seconds ago leaves his eyes.

I sigh and settle in for him to continue. “Days went by as we tried to find Ivana. I hadn’t made up my mind on whether or not I was ready to run to my parents with my tail between my legs to tell them they were right. I also hadn’t learned enough to go to them with the little I did know.

“What I did know was that Ivana had been homeless up until about a year before I met her in that club. She had a rap sheet as long as my body. She had no family. Her parents were dead and the aunt that raised her had died a few years prior, which led to her being homeless. She’d been on the streets from the time she was seventeen.

“None of it added up at first. Ivana always wore the best, had the best of everything. She fit into with our lifestyle. No one ever questioned if she came from money. When I tried to spoil, her she refused.

“Wyatt and Noah Black were onto a money trail the day my father started to call my phone none stop. I knew something was wrong. I didn’t want to answer but I knew I needed to. When I finally went to answer my phone rang again. I was floored to see Ivana’s number.

* * *

N
ick

I just stared at the phone at first. I couldn’t believe she was calling. It had been days since Ivana disappeared. I was in shock to see her calling me. I forgot all about calling my father back. I needed to hear what Ivana had to say.

“Hello,” I quickly answered the phone before it went to voicemail.

“Son, she was right, you would answer her calls,” my father’s voice came through the line.

“Dad?” I say in confusion. “Where is Ivana? What are you doing with her phone?”

“The question is where are you, Nicholas? We have been to your apartment. You weren’t there. It is of a great deal of importance that I speak with you. I need to tell you some things and Ivana needs to share something with you as well,” my father explains with urgency in his voice.

“I’m at the Black and Hart office. I’ve been digging for some answers of my own,” I hiss.

“God no, Son. Stop, stop right now. Is Kevin with you?” My dad asks in a panic. I had never heard my father panic before.

Worry makes its way into my gut. Something is very wrong. My mind spins with all of the things that could be going on. When I have no answers and my father’s voice raises to get my attention, I am snapped back to the call I am on.

“Nicholas, is Kevin Briggs with you?” My father asks again desperately.

“Yes, father. He is,” I reply.

“Oh, thank God. Nick, I love you, Son. I plan to make this all go away. Don’t move. I am coming to you. I have your mother and Ivana with me, we will settle this matter once and for all. I am so sorry we have created this mess. But I’ll fix it, Son.”

“Okay, Dad,” is all I manage to say. I am too confused to say more.

* * *

S
ephora

“I wish I would have said more,” Nick’s voice cracks as he recants the story of that day so long ago. “I wish I would have told him I loved him too. I wish I would have asked to speak to my mom.”

I am completely shaken when I see a lone tear slip from Nick’s eyes. I reach to wipe it away wishing I could wipe away the hurt as well. My heart feels so heavy; I have a feeling I already know what is coming next.

“Nick,” I say softly, but he shakes his head.

“It was ruled an accident, which was total bullshit. Wyatt didn’t have to tell me. I already knew there was foul play. I was ready to find the bastard that did it. I wanted to make him pay.

“Little did I know; he was a step ahead of us all. I have been in a game I didn’t even know I was playing in. I couldn’t touch him. Not then. What Wyatt uncovered stopped me dead in my tracks.

“I had no choice but to bury the truth along with my parents, my girlfriend, and my unborn daughter. Turns out dad was in the middle of a major deal that was needed to pump funds into the company. Not just his company, but Emilsson International, Hilton Industries, Ligal Enterprises, Carver World Group, and there were a few silent partners that were too dangerous for me to cross. I had to go along with covering everything up.

“I paid a hefty price to make it all go away. I made it as if my family started with me. I erased everything and anything from my past. The only lose string was the mystery man that tried to destroy my life for reasons I still don’t know.

“If I didn’t, I could have lost everything my father, his father and his father’s father built. If the truth had come out the investors would have pulled out and everyone would have been on the losing end. However, this what that bastard was after, he made his point very clear.

“I spent the first year getting the company back on its feet. The deal went through but it was only a Band-Aid. I needed FLI to be as strong as it was when my grandfather handed it over to my dad if not stronger.

“I did everything I could to turn it around. That is when the videos and pictures of your dad turned up,” Nick takes a pause as I stiffen in his arms.

I look up at him with pleading eyes. I don’t want to relive that time in my life right now. Everything he has just shared with me is already too heavy. I don’t know if I can relive the hurt from finding out my father was never the man I thought he was.

“Sephora, I know you and Ettie were hurt the most by what happened with your father. Neither of you knew the real truth. Your father let Ettie believe what she did because the truth was too dangerous. For a long time, Luke believed the same things you guys did.

“I couldn’t tell him the truth. I thought it was my fault. That I had brought all of this down on my friends and their families. Little did I know that deal that I saved by burying the truth is what pinned us all together against the same wall,” Nick sighs.

I wait as he seems to try to figure out how he is going to say his next words. I feel like I am on overload. It is all so overwhelming. I don’t know what to think about or analyze first.

“I promised Luke I would let him tell you what really happened back then with your dad. I just need you to know that we have been tied to one and other for a long time. I’m a selfish man. I should never have pursued you. I knew the risks. I knew this all could open a can of worms all over again. He has just been quiet for so long.

“For eight years we have waited for him to make his next move. I mean we,” Nick pauses as if he is about to say too much and looks away.

“What,” I ask not able to take the suspense.

“We can’t prove whether or not some events were a result of the man behind the voice on Ivana’s call in my office. The man is a damn phantom. Whenever we make a move shit like that lawsuit or the deal that fell apart in Seattle happens.

“I just... I just won’t not live my life because of a damn phantom. I lost my parents. I lost my little girl that I was so in love with just from hearing her heart beat. I cared for Ivana, despite her betrayal. I lost everything that day. My money, FLI, none of it can replace what I lost,” Nick reaches up to wipe away the tears I still haven’t registered are spilling from my eyes.

Nick places his forehead to mine, he inhales deeply. “I love you more than anything in my life, Sephora. I’ve said it before; I will say it again. I will take my last breath making sure you are always safe. You are the world to me and more,” are the words that wrap around me as I try to pull it together.

We stand like this for what seems like hours, but it is only minutes. It is an enough time for the weight of his words, every single word, to sink in. One question pushes to the front of my mind. My mouth is moving before my brain catches up.

“Why would I leave you? What about all of this would make you think I would leave you? I trust you to keep me safe. So why would you think I would leave,” I say.

Nick closes his eyes and shakes his head. “Baby, do you understand the danger I am putting you in? Not am I only putting your life in danger by having you in my life. After losing my parents and my daughter, I went to a very dark place. I wouldn’t do relationships, I didn’t date. I threw myself into the life. I found subs that would let me push the boundaries of my sadism to the limits.