365 Days (26 page)

Today dragged on and on and on. Why is it when you’re soooooo looking forward to something, time moves like a tortoise with a heart condition? And when you don’t want time to go by, it races off like a hare on steroids? Got ticked off by Mr. Spencer in Science for knocking over my Bunsen burner, but it wasn’t my fault! I was distracted by Han leaning over to me and whispering ‘Wanna feed me strawberries in bed tomorrow morning?’ in my ear. What’s a girl to do?!

We stopped by Han’s house on the way home so she could pick up her stuff. She put in a few things of each, saying that she wasn’t expecting to wear many clothes all weekend anyway, then fished out the skimpiest, laciest, blackest set of underwear I’d ever seen and held them up to me, asking ‘You like these?’ I spluttered and nodded like some demented idiot, and she grinned lazily and put them in her bag. As we were leaving the house, her mum called out to her and asked her if she had everything she needed. Han called back ‘Yup. Underwear and a toothbrush—that’s all I’ll need.’ Her mum’s a nurse. She’d understand.

2:40 a.m.

The black underwear was
much
appreciated by me! Han is downstairs getting drinks (replacing lost fluids). Am shattered and utterly, utterly in love!!!

Saturday 8 December

Had a really lazy Saturday morning wrapped in each other’s arms. We went downstairs, Han wearing my nightshirt, which turned me on something chronic, and I saw that Mum had bought croissants for me and HRBH as a treat. Felt awful and hideously guilty. We made coffees and heated up the croissants and took them back up to bed, Han licking the crumbs off my tummy, which made me giggle.

Mum sent me a text just as me and Han were
doing it
for the second time this morning (the licking of the crumbs got out of hand), and made me jump like a rabbit. It said, ‘Arr’d ok. PaRis gr-8. Lv M.’ No, she
still
hasn’t got the hang of texting. Reluctantly got up around 3 p.m. and took Barbara out for a walk ’cos she was looking miserable and had all four legs crossed. We walked hand in hand up in the woods (me and Han, not me and Barbara) and didn’t care who saw us!

Then Han cooked us some food tonight. She was standing frying up bits and pieces in just her bra and knickers (and an apron—lest the hot fat should spit). She has a figure to die for, and legs up to her armpits and as I watched her, I felt a million butterflies fluttering in my tummy (and not ’cos I was hungry). She turned and saw me leaning against the sideboard looking at her and said, ‘What?’ with a grin. I just said, ‘Nothing. You’re gorgeous, thassall. And I’m very lucky to have you,’ and she poked her tongue out at me and said, ‘Yeah, you are,’ then flicked a piece of hot mushroom at me.

What a girl!

Sunday 9 December

Spent another lazy morning in bed wrapped round each other.
Did the deed
another three times. Feel a bit like some randy rabbit. Am slightly worried I’ll be walking like John Wayne soon.

We got up around twelve and took a bath together. I spotted Mum’s floral shower cap on the side and felt horribly guilty again. I hate feeling bad about something I should be feeling so happy about. I mean, I AM happy when I’m with Han, but there’s always this feeling that I’m doing something wrong, and there shouldn’t be. I don’t like lying about stuff, and creeping round trying to cover my tracks. It feels so…I dunno…sordid, and it isn’t!

Anyway, we spent our last afternoon of freedom just lost in each other—walking, talking, laughing, hugging, kissing…

Peace was shattered when HRBH arrived home around 4 p.m. looking like she’d been dragged through a hedge backwards. I think she must have spent the weekend living the rock ’n roll life with Joe, ’cos she stank of stale cigarettes and beer and her voice was hoarse. She looked a bit like one of the Rolling Stones the morning after a particularly fruitful bender. She fell in through the door, looked cross-eyed at me and Han, flung her bags on the floor, and muttered something about taking a shower.

When she came back down, me and Han were still sitting on the sofa. She sniffed, looked us both up and down in disdain, and said, ‘You two look like you just got up. I s’pose you’ve spent, like, the whole weekend in bed?’ After Han had finished choking on her tea, she added, ‘Y’lazy buggers,’ and Han’s face returned to its normal colour once more…

Mum and Dad returned from their sojourn in Paris at around 7 p.m. looking (and acting) like a pair of loved-up teenagers. Yuk, yuk, yuk!

Monday 10 December

Had a real sweet text from Han thanking me for ‘the best weekend of her life’. Wow! What an amazing text for a girl to get first thing in the morning! My tummy kinda went to mush when I read it! I’m not sure that was from remembering everything we’d
done
over the last few days, or the fact that Han was actually thanking me for it! Anyway, it made me feel dead special.

Tuesday 11 December

Started thinking about what to buy Han for Christmas but I honestly have NO idea what to get her. I figure I’ll go take a wander in town one day next week and hope something jumps out at me! Luckily she’s not fussy, so anything suitably black, depressing, and Gothic will be appreciated!

I made a list of what to get other people and came up with:

• Mum—something for the kitchen
  
• Dad—something for the garden
  
• Sister—something for that miserable face of hers (cream or face pack or paper bag or some such)
  
• Alice—something rabbity
  
• Ems—something Ryan can’t nick off her
  
• Caroline—something. Just something (I have NO idea yet)
  
• Matty—something with Zac Efron on it.
  

I think I’ll get Han to go and buy that last one. I bought enough of that crap already this year for her birthday, and I don’t want that fit girl who works in the Hallmark
shop
to think I’m some sort of loser.

Wednesday 12 December

I think Han’s predictive texting is up the crapper because she sent me a text today saying ‘Hi pewsou, hows trials?’

I had NO idea what she meant so just sent her one back saying, ‘Eh?’ but she didn’t reply so maybe she was a bit embarrassed that she seems to have lost the art of texting!

Thursday 13 December

We had our school Christmas concert this afternoon. It was crap. The school orchestra played a piece that sounded like it had only been rehearsed for the first time yesterday (it probably had, knowing our school). Me and Han sat at the back of the school assembly hall making derogatory remarks about the size of the oboist’s chest, and stifling giggles at the sight of Miss Barker’s attempts to conduct (note to Miss Barker: flinging your arms around as if you’re being attacked by an angry wasp and pulling funny faces at the orchestra doesn’t constitute conducting). Some girls from Year 7 came up onto the stage and murdered a few Christmas carols; I definitely saw Mrs. Unwin wince as though she’d just eaten a lemon when the entire choir failed to hit the top A during their rendition of ‘O Come All Ye Faithful,’ but I thought she did well not to let her emotions show when Rosie Butler from 9CS sang flat throughout her solo of ‘Once in Royal David’s City’.
It struck me as I was walking home that Mrs. Unwin would make a fine poker player.

Friday 14 December

I asked Han about her weird text to me the other day but she just said, ‘Oh, I sent that to you by mistake. Soz.’

So I asked her what she meant to say and she was, like, really vague, just saying, ‘Blimey, I dunno, it was two days ago, Clemmykins! Do you expect me to remember?’ I was a bit pissed off, to be honest, ’cos she seemed a bit short with me, so I said, ‘So if you sent it to me by mistake, who did you really mean to send it to?’ and she nearly bit my bloody head off! She said, ‘Jeez, Clem! What’s with all the questions all of a sudden?’ which took me aback so I just laughed nervously and shut up. I’ve no idea why she was so sodding moody about it all. Maybe she’s got her period. That tends to turn her into Frankincense’s Monster at the drop of a hat.

Saturday 15 December

Han sent me a text late last night saying sorry for being a bit snappy yesterday but said she’d had a headache all day. That would explain it then (!)

Sunday 16 December

Went into town with HRBH this afternoon to buy some presents. I bought Mum a new casserole dish ’cos she smashed her other one, and Dad a new spade. Not very exciting, I know, but useful, so they should be grateful. Me and HRBH clubbed together, as we always do, and between us bought Dad a new MP3 player ’cos his was looking old and decrepit, and Mum a slow cooker. Felt a bit bad ’cos I’ve bought Mum two kitchen things, but as she spends half her life in the kitchen so at least she’ll get some use out of them, unlike, say, a gift voucher which she’ll probably just leave in a drawer somewhere and forget about.

HRBH went off to buy my present, and one for Joe, so I slipped into the chemist to try and find something for her, and started looking at the makeup. I have NO idea when it comes to makeup. I think the dolly-bird behind the counter felt sorry for me ’cos she offered me a free makeup advice session with free samples. Bearing in mind she looked like she’d trowelled on her foundation from a wheelbarrow behind the counter, I thought she might offer me a free gardening session with it and a bag of compost. I politely declined.

I decided to buy some shower gel and massage cream for HRBH, then went up to Sole
Trader
and bought Han some black Vans
that she’d dropped major hints about wanting when we were last in town together. They cost a flipping fortune, and as I shakily handed over my money, I kept thinking about how they’d probably be £10 cheaper come the sales. I also got her some more leather wristbands ’cos I know she likes to have a choice to wear, and some obscure CD which I found in the bargain bucket at the Virgin Megastore
for 3 quid.

So that’s it! Christmas shopping done and dusted by December 17. Sometimes I’m so perfect it scares me!!

Monday 17 December

I’ve just noticed (how did I not see this before?!?!?) that Han has 88 friends on Facebook!!!!! Why would one person need so many friends?? I’ve now got 12, and that’s only ’cos Ryan added me after Matty told him I didn’t have many friends, and he felt sorry for me.

I asked Han why she had so many friends and she shrugged and said, ‘People keep adding me. So I’m popular, what can I do?’ and winked at me, which made me go a bit silly, like it always does. I asked her who her friends were ’cos I’d looked at them and only recognised some people from school. She laughed drily and said, ‘Checking up on me, Clem?’ but linked her fingers with mine when she said it, so I knew she wasn’t pissed off or anything.

I said, ‘No, just curious,’ and made sure I kept my voice light so she wouldn’t get pissed off with me. She just said breezily, ‘Oh well, you know, there’s friends from where I was before, people I knew, people I used to hang out with.’

I wanted to know if there were any ex-girlfriends on there, but I was too scared to ask. I kept thinking about it for the rest of the day, though, right through school, right through tea, and for the rest of the evening. I kept thinking about the text she sent me as well, but which she reckoned was for someone else, and then of course my mind started going into overdrive, so just before I went to bed I sent her a text and asked her if any of her exes were on there but she hasn’t replied yet.

Am I being paranoid? Am I being stupid? Or am I just being like those clingy, whingy women you see in soaps?

God, maybe I’m being all three??

Tuesday 18 December

Spent most of the night thinking about bloody Facebook and why Han’s got so many people on there, and why she’s never thought to tell me about it. I mean, it’s like, we tell each other EVERYTHING, so why wouldn’t she tell me she’s, like, Miss Popular in the world of Facial Networking?

Then at school today I wanted to ask Han about it all again, because it was all doing my head in thinking about it, but I didn’t ’cos I was too scared to ask her, although I’m not sure exactly what it is I’m scared about. We didn’t see each other much today anyway.

So I sent her a text asking her about it instead, but she hasn’t replied yet.

Feeling a bit down.

Wednesday 19 December

The school canteen was offering Christmas dinners at £3.50 a go today, so me, Han, Alice, Ems, and Matty all met up and dined in style at lunchtime. Caroline decided not to join us ’cos she’s vegetarian and the only vegetarian thing on the menu was nut loaf, which Caroline said looked like a piece of house brick. Our lunch was okay, surprisingly enough.

Han didn’t really say much to me over lunch, so I wondered if she really was pissed off with me for asking about Facebook the other day. I dunno. I kept looking at her and smiling, but I got the feeling that I wasn’t getting much back from her.