92 Little Tricks for Big Success in Relationships

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T
here are two kinds of people in this life:

Those who walk into a room and say,

“Well, here I am!”

And those who walk in and say,

“Ahh, there you are.”

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For more information about this title, click here.

✰ Contents

Introduction: How to Get Anything You Want

from Anybody (Well, at Least Have

the Best Crack at It!) . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
xi
Part One: How to Intrigue Everyone Without

Saying a Word: You Only Have Ten

Seconds to Show You’re a Somebody . . . . .
1

1 How to Make Your Smile Magically Different. . . . . . . . .
5

2 How to Strike Everyone as Intelligent and

Insightful by Using Your Eyes . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
9

3 How to Use Your Eyes to Make Someone Fall in

Love with You . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
14

4 How to Look Like a Big Winner Wherever You Go. . . .
17

5 How to Win Their Heart by Responding to Their

“Inner Infant” . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
21

6 How to Make Someone Feel Like an Old Friend

at Once . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
27

7 How to Come Across as 100 Percent Credible

to Everyone . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
31

8 How to Read People Like You Have ESP . . . . . . . . . . .
35

9 How to Make Sure You Don’t Miss a Single Beat . . . . .
39

v

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Part Two: How to Know What to Say After

You Say “Hi” . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
43

10 How to Start Great Small Talk. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
47

11 How to Sound Like You’ve Got a Super

Personality (No Matter What You’re Saying!) . . . . . .
51

12 How to Make People Want to Start a

Conversation with You . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
56

13 How to Meet the People
You
Want to Meet . . . . . . . . .
59

14 How to Break into a Tight Crowd . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
61

15 How to Make “Where Are You From?”

Sound Exciting. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
63

16 How to Come Out a Winner Every Time

They Ask, “And What Do You Do?” . . . . . . . . . . . .
68

17 How to Introduce People Like the Host(ess)

with the Most(est) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
71

18 How to Resuscitate a Dying Conversation . . . . . . . . . .
73

19 How to Enthrall ’Em with Your Choice of

Topic—Them! . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
76

20 How to Never Need to Wonder, “What Do I

Say Next?” . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
78

21 How to Get ’Em Happily Chatting (So You Can

Slip Away if You Want To!) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
82

22 How to Come Across as a Positive Person . . . . . . . . . .
87

23 How to Always Have Something Interesting

to Say . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
89

Part Three: How to Talk Like a VIP . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
93

24 How to Find Out What They Do (Without Even

Asking!). . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
95

25 How to Know What to Say When They Ask,

“What Do
You
Do?”. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
98

26 How to Sound Even Smarter Than You Are . . . . . . . .
103

00 (i-xviB) front matter 8/14/03 9:16 AM Page vii

27 How to Not Sound Anxious (Let Them Discover

Your Similarity) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
107

28 How to Be a “
You
-Firstie” to Gain Their Respect
and Affection . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
110

29 How to Make Them Feel You “Don’t Smile at

Just Anybody” . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
115

30 How to Avoid Sounding Like a Jerk. . . . . . . . . . . . . .
119

31 How to Use Motivational Speakers’ Techniques to

Enhance Your Conversation . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
121

32 How to Banter Like the Big Shots Do (Big

Winners Tell It Like It Is) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
127

33 How to Avoid the World’s Worst Conversational

Habit . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
129

34 How to Give Them the Bad News (and Have

Them Like You All the More). . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
131

35 How to Respond When You Don’t Want to

Answer (and Wish They’d Shut the Heck Up) . . . . .
134

36 How to Talk to a Celebrity. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
136

37 How to Make Them Want to Thank You . . . . . . . . .
140

Part Four: How to Be an Insider in Any Crowd:

What Are They All Talking About? . . . .
143

38 How to Be a Modern-Day Renaissance Man

or Woman . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
145

39 How to Sound Like You Know All About Their

Job or Hobby . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
150

40 How to Bare Their Hot Button (Elementary

Doc-Talk) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
154

41 How to Secretly Learn About Their Lives . . . . . . . . .
157

42 How to Talk When You’re in Other Countries . . . . . .
161

43 How to Talk Them into Getting the “Insider’s

Price” (on Practically Anything You Buy) . . . . . . . .
165

00 (i-xviB) front matter 8/14/03 9:16 AM Page viii

Part Five: How to Sound Like You’re Peas in

a Pod: “Why, We’re Just Alike!”. . . . . . . .
171

44 How to Make Them Feel You’re of the Same “Class” .
173

45 How to Make Them Feel That You’re Like “Family”. .
176

46 How to
Really
Make It Clear to Them . . . . . . . . . . .
182

47 How to Make Them Feel You Empathize (Without

Just Saying “Yep, Uh Huh, Yeah”) . . . . . . . . . . . . .
186

48 How to Make Them Think You See/Hear/Feel It

Just the Way They Do . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
188

49 How to Make ’Em Think
We
(Instead of
You

vs.
Me
) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
192

50 How to Create a Friendly “Private Joke” with Them . .
195

Part Six: How to Differentiate the Power of

Praise from the Folly of Flattery . . . . . .
199

51 How to Compliment Someone (Without Sounding

Like You’re Brownnosing) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
202

52 How to Be a “Carrier Pigeon” of Good Feelings . . . .
204

53 How to Make ’Em Feel Your Admiration “Just

Slipped Out” . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
207

54 How to Win Their Hearts by Being an “Undercover

Complimenter” . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
209

55 How to Make ’Em Never Forget You with a “Killer

Compliment” . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
211

56 How to Make ’Em Smile with “Itty-Bitty Boosters”. .
214

57 How to Praise with Perfect Timing . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
217

58 How to Make ’Em Want to Compliment
You
. . . . . .
220

59 How to Make a Loved One Feel You Are THE

Partner for Life . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
224

Part Seven: How to Direct Dial Their Hearts . . . .
229

60 How to Sound More Exciting on the Phone . . . . . . .
231

61 How to Sound Close (Even if You’re Hundreds

of Miles Away) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
234

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62 How to Make ’Em Happy They Called You. . . . . . . .
236

63 How to Sneak Past the Gatekeeper . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
240

64 How to Get What You Want on the Phone from

Big Shots . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
242

65 How to Get What You Want—by Timing! . . . . . . . .
245

66 How to Impress Everyone with Your Outgoing

Voicemail Message . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
248

67 How to Get Them to Call You Back . . . . . . . . . . . . .
252

68 How to Make the Gatekeeper Think You’re

Buddy-Buddy with the VIP . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
255

69 How to Make Them Say You Have Super Sensitivity .
257

70 How to “Listen Between the Lines” on the Phone . . .
259

Part Eight: How to Work a Party Like a Politician

Works a Room: The Politician’s Six-

Point Party Checklist . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
265

71 How to Avoid the Most Common Party Blooper . . . .
270

72 How to Make an Unforgettable Entrance . . . . . . . . .
272

73 How to Meet the People YOU Want to Meet . . . . . .
274

74 How to Subliminally Lure People to You at

a Gathering . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
278

75 How to Make ’Em Feel Like a Movie Star . . . . . . . . .
281

76 How to Amaze Them with What You Remember

About Them . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
285

77 How to Make the Sale with Your Eyeballs . . . . . . . . .
288

Part Nine: How to Break the Most Treacherous

Glass Ceiling of All: Sometimes People

Are Tigers . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
293

78 How to Win Their Affection by Overlooking