A Brief Moment in TIme (19 page)

“I’m sorry I wasn’t there for that,” he teased, caressing her hand with his thumb.

“You’re here now,” she looked at him longingly, throwing caution aside, wanting more than anything else in that moment to be in his arms. Suddenly her desire manifest, and Gavin’s arms were around her, holding her tight. She was crying, although they were tears of joy, and he comforted her for a moment before he looked into her eyes and then silently at her lips. He wiped away a tear that had rolled down her cheek and met her lips with a kiss that far surpassed any she had previously dreamed of.

The moment was magical, and she gave herself to it completely. She had fallen in love with Gavin McDermott and thought she’d lost him forever. Now he’d returned more wonderful than she’d imagined, proving their love was not bound by time or space. It was a mighty force that defied all reason, offering hope when none was visible and a glimpse of the future that seemed to have been lovingly written for them by All that Is.

Chapter 18

IN GAVIN’S FIRST waking moments, he questioned if what he’d experienced with Kate had been a dream. The day they’d spent together had been surreal. Seeing her at the prison, going out with her, learning that she’d felt what he had and experienced even more—it left him reeling. He couldn’t wait to see her again.

They’d planned to meet that morning. So much needed to be discussed. Kate had come to set up her program at the prison, and Gavin knew he was meant to be a part of it. It felt right. But there was more now. They had a history together, a mysterious love that bound them. It was hard to understand but impossible to deny, and Gavin wanted nothing more than to embrace it and allow it to unfold.

The kiss they’d shared was extraordinary, as if all the kisses in his dreams had culminated in that moment and combined to create the perfect kiss. Now he wanted more; he wanted all of her. But he was content to wait. As much as he felt Kate’s love and passion, he felt her hesitancy too. She was afraid of moving ahead too quickly.

He told his parents about the meeting and shared his excitement about the possibility of working with Kate. He would have to tell them about the budding relationship soon, too, but the timing wasn’t right. They wouldn’t understand all that had taken place in a realm he couldn’t explain. Even so, he knew the situation would work itself out. Kate had already met his parents, sort of, and she loved them. He was confident that they would love her, too.

He arrived at her hotel by 11:30 and they went for lunch. She looked young, carefree, and even more beautiful than the Kate of his dreams. He couldn’t take his eyes off her. She wore formfitting jeans and a colorful sleeveless top that showed off her figure beautifully in layers of gauzy fabric over a solid tank top. She had a slim build and was above average height for a woman. Dressed in trendy, casual clothes, she looked sexy and ten years younger than the image she’d first portrayed in his dream.

They went in his car. It had been his next major purchase after the computer, and he couldn’t describe the liberating feeling of being behind the wheel again. It was another expression of freedom that he thoroughly enjoyed—one that most take for granted, but one he could now enjoy on a level that went beyond the ordinary.

“You look really good,” he smiled as he glanced over at her. “I like this look on you.”

“I haven’t spent much time on my appearance in the last few years,” she admitted. “I threw myself into my work after my…” she paused, and Gavin wondered if she was ready to discuss her late husband. “After Kevin died.”

“Yesterday, after we were together, I went to my hotel room, and when I looked in the mirror I realized something. I felt young, but I looked much older. I don’t know how that happened. So I decided to do something about it. I found a salon and got my hair cut and then went shopping. It was fun.”

Gavin was touched by the lengths she’d gone to update her style for him. He’d seen her beauty right from the beginning; it was an integral part of who she was. Now he found her not just attractive but sexy and irresistible too. He reached for her hand and held it as he drove.

They arrived at the restaurant and found a place to park. Before opening his door, he turned toward her and for a moment gazed at her. He wanted to let her know how he felt but didn’t want to be too intense; they still needed to talk about where their relationship was headed. He wanted to tell her how beautiful she was without it sounding like he was just coming on to her.

Before he could decide on the right words, she reached out and tenderly stroked his face. Smiling, she kissed him lightly on the lips and then turned to open her door. From any other woman it might have been a tease, but from Kate it was a clear message telling him where she was emotionally. He still needed to take it slow.

Gavin worked at keeping the conversation light as they ate lunch. There was so much they didn’t know about each other, and he enjoyed learning new things about Kate.

She was athletic. He’d judged from her tall, trim figure that she would be well suited to sports, and he wasn’t surprised to learn that she enjoyed tennis and racquetball and was an avid swimmer. She’d competed in swimming competitions in college and had made it to the national finals one year. When her hunger for knowledge and growing desire to help people through the field of psychology won out over her love of sports, she’d given her heart and dedicated her life to pursuing that dream.

Kate was animated as she spoke, using her hands to accentuate what she was describing. Gavin liked that about her. She was talkative but drew him into the conversation with questions. She frequently tucked her now-shoulder-length hair behind her neck. A fringe of hair cascaded down across her forehead and blended flawlessly into the rest of her golden-brown locks, and she brushed it aside occasionally as she spoke. Gavin imagined running his hands through the soft-flowing mane. He had in his dreams, and he longed to experience it again. He continued to daydream, not aware that she had stopped talking.

“You’re not saying much; is everything okay?”

“I’m sorry,” he replied, deciding to be frank with her. “It’s just that we’re here together. It’s hard to believe. I’ve had to pinch myself a few times already. You’re everything that I dreamed of. Not to mention, you look amazing. I can’t take my eyes off you.”

“I know we should talk about what’s happening between us...” She looked down, and Gavin sensed that her hesitation about engaging in a relationship may have escalated. “But I don’t know where to start. It’s so far beyond anything I’ve ever known. Part of me wants to let go and trust that it will take us somewhere wonderful; another part is cautioning me to be careful and take it slow.

“If this was an ordinary relationship,” she continued, “I’d be concerned about our age difference. I’d question the fact that you’ve just spent nearly eighteen years in prison, and I just happen to be the first woman you’ve met. Other than our paranormal experiences, we know very little about each other; we may not have much in common.”

Gavin was quiet. He hadn’t looked at the situation from her perspective, but he could understand now why Kate was reluctant to move forward too quickly. He wanted to address her concerns and quell her fears, if possible, but had to acknowledge the truth in what she’d said. He decided to try anyway.

“Kate,” he reached through the maze of items on the table and took her hand. “Those are valid concerns. I’m certainly not experienced in matters like this, but it seems to me that every couple must face issues that could potentially make or break the relationship if they let them.”

She remained silent, so he continued. “What we have is bigger than that. It’s a connection that goes beyond what we know and understand. Something greater than us is orchestrating this. We’re like pawns in a giant game of chess.”

“Maybe that’s the part that scares me,” Kate admitted. “I’ve always felt in control of my life, at least somewhat, and this feels out of control. Not in a bad way,” she quickly added. “It’s just that I’ve always trusted what I know to guide me.”

“You said that one part of you wants to trust, and the other is being cautious. Which one feels better?” he asked, knowing it was the kind of advice she’d given him in the past.

She looked up at him, frowning, then smiled and shook her head. “You’re right. I have a perfectly good guidance system, and I’m disregarding it, trying to think rationally.”

As Gavin watched her take a deep breath, he prayed that she would find the strength she needed to allow her heart to guide her.

“In the car,” she began quietly, “when I thought you were dying, I didn’t want to live without you. When I woke from the coma, you were the first person I asked for. Even when I learned that everything I thought had happened, didn’t, I couldn’t stop thinking about you. And I came here…” She was on the verge of tears again, and Gavin longed to hold her. “Not just to implement my program at Swenton. I came with the hope that somehow I’d find you.”

“We found each other, Kate,” he smiled, his heart swelling at her revelation. “It just feels right. I don’t care about the difference in our ages. I’m glad you’re the first woman that I laid eyes on after so many years behind bars. And I think we do have a lot in common. I want to work with you in the prison. I want to learn all I can and help the men just like you do. I want to spend time with you and get to know everything about you—even if it takes a lifetime. I like racquetball and swimming. I’ll learn how to play tennis, and if you say you like ballroom dancing, I’ll learn that too. I love you, Kate.”

KATE COULDN’T hold back the flood of tears. Gavin was the most extraordinary man she had ever met, and he was unashamedly declaring his love for her. Suddenly she couldn’t remember why she’d doubted her feelings for him. She was in love with him—truly, deeply, and completely. Not only that, but she had renewed faith in the greater part of her that always guided her perfectly. Now she wanted to let Gavin know how much she loved him. She wanted to give herself to him completely. Wiping away her tears, she smiled, “Let’s get out of here.”

As they entered the hotel lobby, she saw him glance at the sofa they’d occupied the previous day. She took him by the hand, leading the way to the elevator. He looked at her, a question in his eyes.

“I love you, Gavin,” she responded. “I know that now, and I’m ready to move forward in our relationship. I’m ready to let it be all that it can be.”

When the elevator doors closed, he took her in his arms and kissed her with an intensity that left her breathless. She responded in kind, and suddenly the passion that he’d been suppressing and she’d been denying was released. It was the most powerful feeling she’d ever known. They were two people deeply in love, and they’d both been deprived of the physical act for too long; they could hardly wait for the privacy of a hotel room.

Once inside, however, Gavin stopped kissing her and looked into her eyes. “This means more to me than just sex,” he whispered, his breath labored from the urgency of their kisses. “I want this to be amazing for both of us.”

Kate had no doubt that would be the case, but his regard for her was touching. She began unbuttoning his shirt with one hand, while the other explored the hard muscles of his chest and arms. Removing his shirt, Kate took a moment to look at Gavin’s impressive upper body, now fully exposed. It was breathtaking and perfect, a replica of the gods, and it made her ache for all that he had to offer.

She led him to the bed and lay down, her eyes beseeching him to join her. There they continued undressing each other and exploring the treasures beneath the layers, their passion mounting to new heights until it erupted in the most beautiful of all human acts.

Afterward, Kate lay back exhausted but completely satisfied. Although Gavin was somewhat inexperienced, he was a gentle and considerate lover. She hoped that their first time together had been all he had anticipated.

Not wanting to ask him directly, she looked at him and saw the answer written on his face. He turned to her, smiling broadly, and she had to laugh. The look of wonder and amazement on his face was priceless.

All of a sudden a thought occurred to her. “Gavin, was this…?” She hadn’t entertained the idea that it might be his first time with any woman, not just her, and she wondered if talking about it might be uncomfortable. She tried to think of a less awkward way to phrase her question but found none. Instead, she propped herself up on one elbow and smiled back at him. “That was incredible.”

Gavin nodded in response but remained quiet for a moment, looking pensive. “I started dating a girl in my senior year,” he explained in answer to her unfinished question. “I was shy; I wanted to ask her out for months before I finally worked up the nerve.

“We did stuff,” he asserted awkwardly. “You know what it’s like when you’re a teenager. Things can get out of control in the back seat of the car, but we never went all the way. She was too worried about getting pregnant. It was never...like this.”

He was blushing, and Kate realized she’d never found him more attractive.

“This is the first time that…”