A Dream of Summer (Bleeding Angels MC Book 3) (11 page)

He slaps Jake on the back like he’s proud of him. “I’ll let you finish up,” he says before stepping back and leaning against the door-frame, making it clear that he’s not going anywhere until the job is done.

“Aimee, this is getting embarrassing. I don’t want you back. I don’t know how to say it any other way. I. Don’t. Want. You. Is that clear enough?” Jake says the words as if he’s been repeating them over and over again and is getting bored. Ryan laughs under his breath—he’s enjoying the show. Humiliation and pain seem to be his forte and here he’s getting boat-loads of both.

Jake’s words are like a punch to the stomach and they knock the breath out of me. I try to tell myself that he’s just acting, that he’s just showing Ryan that he’s a team player and that he’s a world away from the guy he was only a day ago. The tension between us buzzes loudly in my ears and I have to concentrate to stop the tears from making their way through the barriers that I’ve been working on erecting against them.

“So are you going to give me the cash or are you going to just stand there with your mouth open?” Jake scratches the stubble on his chin in a manner that I know so well, but I feel like the person in front of me is someone completely different from the man that had once been my best friend.

I’m too upset to say anything. I so desperately want to believe that he’s just playing a game, making a show for Ryan, letting him see what he wants so that he doesn’t suspect anything.

I hold out the money, but I keep eye contact with Jake, forcing him to look at me, trying to find the man that I love behind the eyes that don’t seem to show any feeling at all. I can’t be sure, but I think I might see a flicker of the person I used to know, the person that used to be in love with me behind the eyes that look so dead.

Without any ceremony, Jake snatches the bills out of my hand and pockets the money, quick as a flash. He does it like a pro, like he’s been doing this for a long time.

“Jake—” I start, but the truth is that I’m not totally sure what it is that I want to say. I guess it would be a mix of “don’t go,” “don’t do this,” “stay with me,” “I’m sorry,” and “I love you.” But I don’t say any of those things; I’m not given the chance to.

“I’m tired of hearing your voice, Aimee. I’m going to say it again, for one last time, for the cheap seats up in the back: It’s over. Get over it. We’re not together anymore and we never will be. Get used to it.” With those words, he turns his back to me and nods at Ryan, his new partner in crime. “Let’s get out of here.”

Ryan looks between Jake and me to see if there’s any shadow of a doubt. The desolation that he must see on my face speaks volumes. I don’t think I could have pretended to be any more upset than I already was. I hold tight onto the Formica counter until my fingers go white from the pressure. I don’t know how I keep standing up straight. All I want to do is collapse onto the floor and hug myself until the tears come and I can cry myself to sleep.

But I’d made a promise to myself. I was never going to let Ryan see what he’d done to me. I was never going to let him see the pain that he’s caused me. So there are no tears tonight. I’m not allowed any tears until Jake is free of the Angels and until they get what’s coming to them.
But what if Jake doesn’t want to be free of them?
The little voice in my head makes an unwelcome return. I push her away, closing her behind a door. I can’t think about that possibility. If I do, I’m sure it would drive me mad.

“Ah, Jakey-boy, you don’t have to be so harsh. Just because Winters here has been a little free and easy with her affections, doesn’t mean you have to cut her out.” I’m surprised at Ryan’s words. I would have thought that this is exactly what he would have wanted—for Jake and me to be as far away from each other as possible. But I know better than to trust him and, yet again, my suspicions are proved right. “It doesn’t mean that you can’t use her for what she is.” The encouragement in his tone is unmistakable and it doesn’t take me long to understand his meaning.

“You’re right, Ryan.” Jake almost sounds grateful for Ryan’s pearls of wisdom, and that in itself makes me sick to my stomach. “Come down to Wheels anytime,” Jake says, his tone deceptively soft. “I’m sure one of the boys would be happy to oblige.” Jack locks eyes with me and I feel like he’s trying to communicate something to me, but I’m blinded by the awfulness of his words—they make me just want to lie down and play dead. “If you play your cards right, Winters, you could be our own little whore. Seems like something you’d be good at.” With those words Jake turns around and heads straight out the door, not waiting for a response.

“Oh, that’s gotta hurt!” Ryan’s appreciation is evident and his gleefulness just makes me hate him even more. How is it possible for someone to take so much pleasure in someone else’s pain? “Well, Aimee, looks like you still have a chance with Jake, if you don’t mind being his little slut. Just like you were for me.” The last words are a whisper and his face is so close to mine that I can smell his rancid breath. It takes me back to that night in his bedroom where all I wanted to do was to run away. “Be seeing you, Winters. Don’t have too much fun without me.” He laughs at his own parting line and gives me a meaningful look from underneath his greasy blonde hair before he follows Jake out, slamming the door behind him.

I hear the noise of one bike start up, then the second, and they both roar off into the distance. I’m feeling dizzy, the first signal that I have a panic attack coming on. I concentrate on my breathing and repeat to myself over and over again that I’m fine, that I’m not scared, that I’m safe. After a minute my breathing is back to normal and I can open my eyes again.

George is standing next to me with unbelieving disbelieving expression on his face. I hadn’t even heard him come in.

“What in god’s name just happened?” He looks about as shocked as I feel. George looks between the open cash register and me and then towards the door where the two men made their escape.

“I’ll replace the money from my wages.” I say the words without even having to think twice. Right now the money is the least of my problems.

“That’s not what I meant.” George’s words are a low rumble.

“I know it isn’t. But that’s all I can cope with at the moment.” I stare down at my hands that have gone numb from holding onto the countertop so hard for so long. Movement in the corner of my eye brings me back to where I am and I realize that the Feds must have heard and seen pretty much everything that just happened. “I’ll be back in a minute,” I tell George as I head over to their table.

The two men are just sitting there looking down at the table when I arrive, and their lack of a reaction makes me wonder if I was wrong and if they’ve actually managed to miss what just played out in front of them.

“I’m sorry about that—” I start to say before Agent Warner holds his hand up to stop me.

“I think Agent Jones has something that he wants to say to you first.” He looks meaningfully over at Mr. Tall.
Finally, he has a name
, I think to myself.

“Whatever reservations I had about you before, I don’t feel them anymore. I understand why you want these guys dealt with.” His words sound sincere and the look in his eyes feels the same.

I’m embarrassed that these men have just seen the worst parts of my private life play out in front of them like a bad daytime soap. But I appreciate Jones’s words. I know how much it takes for a man like that to admit that he was wrong. “Thanks, that means a lot,” I respond quietly, my eyes fixed on a faraway spot out of the window.

My brain is still whirring with what just happened. I ask myself if there’s any chance that Jake will do as I asked and come to the studio tonight. After everything he said to me, I’m finding it hard to hold out a lot of hope for that. But hope is the last thing that we give up—my dad taught me tha,t and the things he taught me haven’t stood me in bad stead so far.

“The wire will get delivered to the body shop in the next 24 hours. Don’t tell anyone that you have it or anything about our conversation. When you have any information, you get in touch with us. This is the last time we’re going to meet like this.” Agent Warner pulls out a cell phone from his pocket and hands it to me. I stare at it in my hands as if it’s the first time I’ve seen one. “It’s a secure line and my number is the only one on there. Only use it when you’re sure that you have something. You’re on your own from here. Don’t put yourself in any danger. Don’t go into any potential situation without our back-up. Do you understand?” He fixes me with a serious stare that leaves me in no doubt over why he’s a man that’s used to giving orders.

“I understand.” I swallow any questions or concerns—there’s no time for either.

“Good.” He nods and, as if that were a signal, both men get up and start making their way out of the booth.

“Sorry about your food. Guess I got a little side-tracked,” I admit, rubbing my eyes like that might dispel everything I’ve just seen.

“Be safe, Ms. Winters.” Warner levels me with a serious gaze once more. “Try not to do anything stupid.” The last words are said with a smile.

“I’ll do my best.” I smile back, but the simple act seems to take all of my energy. I watch Agent Warner walk out the door and the realization that I really am going to be on my own from here on out hits me.

Mr. Jones stops before he follows his boss out. “People do stupid things for love,” he says, and it sounds like he’s speaking from experience. “Try to keep your head, even if it hurts your heart.” He squeezes my shoulder and the friendliness of the gesture almost breaks me in half. Then he walks out the door, leaving me well and truly alone.

I can’t believe that I said those things to Aimee. The words were sticking in my throat and I had to fight just to get them out. I hope she understands why I had to do it, why I had to make it look like I didn’t care.

So does that mean you believe her, Summers?
The suspicious voice in my head asks me, and the truth is I don’t know the answer to that question. I know that I desperately want to believe her, and such a short while ago I would never have had to think twice over whether or not I could trust her. But that doesn’t take away from what she did and I don’t know if I can ever forgive that, let alone forget.

The appalled expression on her face when I said those terrible things to her makes me sick of myself. I pace around the dark room that I’ve been locked in again. Scar had said that it wasn’t a prison, but it’s hard to see it as anything else when I have no way of getting out.

Ryan had barely been able to stop talking when we’d arrived back at the compound. We’d headed back into Wheels and he hadn’t even bothered to hide that he was rubbing coke on his gums as he ordered us a couple of beers. I’m pretty sure that I don’t imagine the looks of disgust some of the bikers give him as he gets high with the stash that they’re supposed to be dealing. But if Ryan notices, he doesn’t seem surprised or bothered by it.

“You should’ve seen her face!” Ryan tells the story over and over again. The words that I say to Aimee get worse at each telling and her reaction becomes more and more pathetic until I can’t take hearing about it anymore. It’s bad enough that I did it and I have to live with the memory of it. I don’t need a director’s cut doing the rounds with the bikers.

“I think I’m going to hit the hay. It’s been a long day.” I hope that my expression is rueful and not disgusted when I look at Ryan, but I soon realize that he’s too far gone to even notice the difference.

“Sure thing, Summers, sure thing. But tomorrow, we’re going to celebrate our new Patch! So rest up; you’ll need your strength!” Ryan laughs like a hyena at this and waves me away before turning to the pretty bar tender and trying to engage the poor girl in conversation.

I feel like I might have hit the jackpot and that I’m going to be able to slip away to figure out if I really do want to go see Aimee. But I underestimated the Angels, and that never ends well. Before I get to the door, a heavy hand lands on my shoulder, and from the sheer size of it I can tell it belongs to Spike.

“Here to escort me back to my suite?” I joke, but Spike’s clearly not in the market for hilarity tonight. He doesn’t even respond, just gives me a little shove in the direction of my one-roomed cell. I barely have time to walk in and turn around before I hear a bolt slide into place and then the familiar
click
of a padlock closing around it.

“So no bedtime story then,” I mutter under my breath, and sit down heavily onto the bed.

I already know what I want to do. I made my decision almost as soon as Aimee asked me to meet her at the shop tonight. There’s nothing that I want more than to see her. I want to apologize for the hurtful things I said to her. It had been too easy to say them, as if I was trying to punish her for the hurt that she’d caused me. It wasn’t right and she deserved better than that.

Did she think that you deserved better when she was boning Ryan?
I wonder. I wish there was a way of turning off a part of your brain. Right now, I could do with shutting up the obnoxious voice in my head.

I pace around the room trying to figure out how to get out of this box, but I know it’s an impossible task. There’s one way in and one way out, and there’s no getting out without a key, which I don’t have. It’s a simple equation: Me + No Key = Screwed.

I’m well aware that if I don’t show at the body shop, I don’t know when I’ll see Aimee next. The idea of being apart from her, of not seeing her face, of not seeing the cute way she bites her bottom lip, gives me an actual pain in my chest. I know what she’ll think if I don’t show tonight. She’ll think that I meant all the terrible things I said to her, that I don’t want to see her, and that the words I called her are exactly what I think of her. She would be wrong. But if I can’t get out of this box then there’s no way of making her see that.

These thoughts are revolving round my head when I hear a murmur of voices from the other side of the door, followed by the click of a padlock opening and then the sound of the bolt sliding back. I jump off the bed, readying myself for whatever it is that the Angels are going to do next.

But it’s not an Angel that walks through the door. It’s Suzie.

“What are you doing here?” I don’t even bother to veil the contempt in my voice. I haven’t seen her since she’d managed to persuade me to go with the Angels without making a fuss, since she’d managed to convince me that Aimee had betrayed me.

“Just thought you might want to see a friendly face.” Suzie smiles lazily and for a split-second there’s a glimpse of the pretty girl that she used to be rather than the wreck of a person that stands in front of me.

“And that’s what you think you are? A friendly face.” I couldn’t sound any more sarcastic if I tried. “Go away, Suzie. You’ve done enough damage for a lifetime.” I lay back on the bed, throwing my elbow over my face and waiting for her to leave.

But I don’t hear her footsteps retreat; instead, it’s the opposite that happens. I can hear her footsteps advancing towards me until she’s standing by the bed. She looks down at me, her chin set in what looks like grim determination and then she does the last thing that I expected. She grabs hold of my belt buckle and deftly opens it, like she’s done it a thousand times. Uncharitably, I think that she probably has.

“Woah, there!” I jump back as if I’ve been burned. “What the hell are you doing?” I hold out my hand to stop her from advancing any further towards me.

“I thought it was pretty obvious what I’m doing.” Suzie looks flirtatiously at me from underneath her lowered lashes. “Why do you think that meat-head let me in? I told him I was your initiation present!” She laughs, but the throatiness sounds more like a harsh cough.

“Well then, I’d like to return the gift.” My voice doesn’t brook any kind of discussion. I don’t want there to be any mistaking what it is that I’m saying.

“Ah, come on Jake. You’re telling me you’ve never wondered what it is that you’re missing?” She sidles over towards me, her breath in my ear, her hand on my chest. I catch her hand in my own, stilling it before she decides to move it anywhere else. She looks like she’s taking this little exchange as flirtation on my part so I release her hand, unable to shake the feeling that I’ve done something wrong. “I saw the way you were looking at Blake at the bar earlier. You want her, don’t you? You can’t wait to have her.” Suzie whispers the words and, before she can advance any further, I stand up and guide her gently a few steps back from me.

“Suzie, don’t do this. Whatever you’re doing, this isn’t you.” I try to connect this girl to the one that I played with as a kid, but she’s almost an entire world away.

“Oh come on, Jake. No one would have to know. I won’t tell. After what Aimee did to you, what is there to think about?” Suzie twirls one of her greasy curls between her fingers and gives me a look that is probably supposed to be seductive, but it just makes me sad.

“Suze, I don’t know what you think it is that you’re doing, but I don’t want this. I’m in love with Aimee. I would never do this to her.” As I say the words, I realize how true they are. I know that I love Aimee more than I thought it was possible to love anyone. Only for that reason, she deserves for me to hear what she has to say.

“Good.” Suzie looks at me and nods as if this was the reaction she had been hoping for.

“Huh?”

“Close your mouth, Summers, you look like a goldfish.” Suzie puts her hands on her hips and there’s a ghost of a smile on her lips. She almost looks like the girl that I used to know. “Now listen and don’t talk; I know it’s hard for you, but that’s what you need to do. Wait here for five minutes and then walk out and grab your bike. It’s the last one on the right. Don’t start it straight away, wheel it out onto the path until you’re a hundred feet or so away, and then you can start it. Make sure you’re back by six. Understand?” She asks the question as she’s already turning back to walk towards the door.

“Yes—I mean, no. What’s going on Suzie? What are you talking about? Back from where?” The questions come tumbling out of my mouth and I wish that I didn’t feel like the one left out of the loop.

“You know where. Just remember, lover-boy, you’re not making a break for it. You need to be back here in the morning. I like my head where it is, thank you very much. I don’t have any intention of letting anyone put it on a stick.” She winks at me before disappearing back through the door.

I make a move to go after her and then I remember her instructions. I can hear voices on the other side of the door; it sounds like two or three different guys, all of them in various stages of drunkenness. I can’t make out what it is that they’re saying because their words are so slurred. But all of a sudden I hear Suzie’s voice clear as a bell.

“You can put it anywhere, boys.” And, as if by magic, the sounds of heavy-booted feet move away from the door.

“Suzie, what are you
doing?
” I mutter. I take a chance and slip out of the room before the 5 minutes are up and I see Suzie bringing up the rear, pointing some men in the direction of a dark outbuilding. Whatever it is that she thinks she’s doing, I can’t let her. Even if she’s trying to help me, her putting herself in that position isn’t right. I can’t have that on my conscience. I take a couple of steps in the direction that they walked off in but, as if Suzie had developed some kind of sixth sense, she looks over at me and her eyes lock with mine. She gives her head a firm shake and jerks her chin behind me, towards where she had told me to pick up the bike. Then, without waiting to see what I’m going to do, she disappears behind the building, following the men that she’d lured away from my door.

“Jesus, Suzie.” I breathe the words out in frustration, but I know that this is the only chance I’m going to get and I know that Suzie has given it to me. I hurry over to the bikes, recognizing the one that I’d been allocated until I have time to tool up my own. I follow Suzie’s instructions and push the bike down the path I probably wouldn’t even have seen if she hadn’t told me it was there. Looks like Suzie had figured her way out of the compound. I check my surroundings to ascertain that I haven’t been seen. When I’m satisfied that I’m alone, I swing my leg over the beast and start the engine, riding as fast as I can.