A History of the Wife (64 page)

1. Cited by Anderson,
   Wartime Women,
   p. 29.
   

2. Glenna Matthews,
   “Just a Housewife”: The Rise and Fall of Domesticity in America
   (New York and Oxford: Oxford University Press, 1987), p. 267. See also Anderson,
   Wartime Women,
   pp. 7–9.
   

3. Alford-Cooper,
   For Keeps,
   p. 111.
   

4. Amy Kesselman,
   Fleeting Opportunities: Women Shipyard Workers in Portland and Vancouver during World War II and Reconversion
   (Albany: State University of New York Press, 1990), p. 29.
   

5. Kesselman,
   Fleeting Opportunities,
   pp. 1–2, 28.
   

6. Virginia Snow Wilkinson, “From Housewife to Shipfitter,”
   Harper’s,
   September, 1943, pp. 328–337.
   

7. Kesselman,
   Fleeting Opportunities,
   p. 6.
   

8. Mary Martha Thomas,
   Riveting and Rationing in Dixie
   (Tuscaloosa and London: University of Alabama Press, 1987), p. 43.
   

9. Since You Went Away,
   ed. Litoff and Smith, p. 147.
   

10. Kesselman,
    Fleeting Opportunities,
    pp. 42–43.
    

11. Anderson,
    Wartime Women,
    p. 37.
    

12. Thomas,
    Riveting,
    p. 6, and chapter 3.
    

27. Ibid., p. 60.

28. Anderson,
Wartime Women,
pp. 28–29. 29. Ibid., pp. 32–33.

30. Ibid., p. 34.

1. Gertrude Morris’s story is told in Olga Gruhzit-Hoyt,
   They Also Served: American Women in World War II
   (New York: A Birch Lane Press Book, Carol Publishing Group, 1995), pp. 77–80.
   

2. Since You Went Away,
   ed. Litoff and Smith, p. 163.
   

3. Dorothy Barnes’s story in Gruhzit-Hoyt,
   They Also Served,
   pp. 109–114.
   

4. Dear Boys: World War II Letters from a Woman Back Home,
   ed. Judy Barnett Litoff and David C. Smith (Jackson and London: University Press of Mississippi, 1991), p. 155.
   

5. Tuttle, “
   Daddy’s Gone to War,
   ” pp. 24–25.
   

6. The Good Housekeeping Cookbook
   (New York and Toronto: Farrar & Rinehart, Inc., 1942), preface.
   

7. Priscilla Robertson and Hawley Jones, “Housekeeping after the War,”
   Harper’s Magazine,
   April 1994, p. 430.
   

8. Tuttle, “
   Daddy’s Gone to War,
   ” pp. 65–66.
   

9. Natsuki Aruga, “Continuity during Change in World War II: Berkeley, Califor- nia, as Seen through the Eyes of Children,” Ph.D. dissertation, Stanford University, May 1996, p. 181.
   

10. Margaret Culkin Banning,
    Women in Defense
    (New York: Duell, Sloan and Pearce, 1942), pp. 142–146.
    

11. Banning,
    Women in Defense,
    p. 177.
    

12. Since You Went Away,
    ed. Litoff and Smith, p. 101.
    

13. Maybelle Hargrove, “Diary of a Volunteer Red Corps Worker in Dibble General Hospital, World War II,” in the Papers of Mrs. Edsall Ford, in the Hoover Archives, Stanford University.
    

14. Elfrieda Berthiaume Shukert and Barbara Smith Subetta,
    War Brides of World War II
    (Novato, CA: Presidio Press, 1988), pp.1–2.
    

15. Alford-Cooper,
    For Keeps,
    p. 47.
    

46. Ibid., p. 46.

1. Steven Mintz and Susan Kellogg,
   Domestic Revolutions
   (New York: Free Press, 1988), p. 171.
   

2. Alford-Cooper,
   For Keeps,
   p. 108. 49. Ibid., p. 109.
   

1. Nell Giles, “What About the Women,”
   Ladies’ Home Journal,
   June 1944, pp. 22–23. Cited by Rupp,
   Mobilizing Women
   , p. 161.
   

2. Cited by Glenna Matthews, “
   Just a Housewife,
   ” p. 208. 52. Ibid., p. 210.
   

53. William Chafe,
The Paradox,
pp. 175–176.

TEN

1. For information on cohabitation, see Pamela J. Smock’s study from the Institute for Social Research at the University of Michigan, as reported by the
   New York Times,
   D8, February 15, 2000. For statistics on out-of-wedlock births, see Amara Bachu, “Trends in Marital Status of U.S. Women at First Birth: 1930 to 1994,” U.S. Bureau of the Census, Population Division Working Paper No. 20, March, 1998. Between 1990 and 1994, 86 percent of African-American mothers, 55 percent of Hispanic women, and 46 percent of white women either conceived or gave birth without the benefits of holy matrimony. Forty-one percent of these women were not married at the time of their first baby’s birth.
   

2. Alfred Kinsey, Wardell Pomeroy, and Clyde Martin,
   Sexual Behavior in the Human Male
   (Philadelphia and London: W. B. Saunders, 1948), and Alfred Kinsey, Wardell Pomeroy, Clyde Martin, and Paul Gebhard,
   Sexual Behavior in the Human Female
   (New York: W. B. Saunders, 1953).
   

3. Kinsey et al.,
   Sexual Behavior in the Human Female,
   Pocket Book Edition, 1965, p. 358.
   

4. Ibid., p. 286.

5. Ibid., p. 364.

6. Ibid., pp. 11–12.

1. Millicent McIntosh, Ph.D., “I am concerned... ,” in
   An Analysis of the Kinsey
   

   Reports on Sexual Behavior in the Human Male and Female,
   ed. Donald Geddes (New York: Dutton, 1954), pp. 140–141.
   

2. Emily Mudd, Ph.D., “Implications for Marriage and Sexual Adjustment,” in ibid., p. 137.
   

3. Stephanie Coontz,
   The Way We Never Were
   (New York: Basic Books, 1992), p. 26.
   

4. Talcott Parsons, “Age and Sex in the Social Structure of the United States,” in
   

   Essays in Sociological Theory
   (Glencoe, Illinois: Free Press, 1949), p. 223.
   

5. Marilyn Yalom,
   A History of the Breast
   (New York: Knopf, 1997), p. 141.
   

6. Susan M. Hartmann,
   The Home Front and Beyond: American Women in the 1940s
   

   (Boston: Twayne Publishers, 1982), pp. 174–175.
   

7. Eugenia Kaledin,
   Mothers and More: American Women in the 1950s
   (Boston: Twayne Publishers, 1984), p. 27.
   

8. Assata Shakur,
   Assata
   (Chicago: Lawrence Hill Books, 1987), p. 37, as cited by Ruth Rosen,
   The World Split Open: How the Modern Women’s Movement Changed America
   (New York: Viking, 2000), p. 44.
   

9. Hartmann,
   The Home Front,
   p. 168.
   

10. Letter to Martha Bernays, November 15, 1883, in
    The Letters of Sigmund Freud
    

    (New York: Basic Books, 1975), p. 28.
    

11. John Bowlby,
    Maternal Care and Mental Health
    (Geneva: World Health Organi- zation, 1951).
    

12. Marilyn Yalom,
    Maternity, Mortality, and the Literature of Madness
    (University Park and London: Pennsylvania State University Press, 1985), chapter 2.
    

13. Joseph C. Reingold, M.D., Ph.D.,
    The Fear of Being a Woman: A Theory of Mater- nal Destructiveness
    (New York and London: Grune & Stratton, 1964), pp. 421– 422.
    

14. Toni Carabillo, Judith Meuli, June Bundy Csida,
    Feminist Chronicles 1953–1993
    

    (Los Angeles: Women’s Graphics, 1993), p. 39.
    

15. Coontz,
    The Way We Never Were,
    pp. 35–37.
    

22. Ibid., p. 37.

1. Mirra Komarovsky,
   Blue-Collar Marriage
   (New Haven: Vintage, 1962), p. 49.
   

2. Chafe,
   The Paradox,
   p. 188.
   

3. Finnegan Alford-Cooper,
   For Keeps: Marriages That Last a Lifetime
   (Armonk, New York, and London: M. E. Sharpe, 1998), p. 113.
   

4. Alford-Cooper,
   For Keeps,
   pp. 113–114.
   

5. Robert O. Blood and Donald Wolfe,
   Husbands and Wives
   (Glencoe, Illinois: The Free Press, 1960).
   

6. See Glenna Matthews,
   “Just a Housewife”: The Rise and Fall of Domesticity in America
   (New York and Oxford: Oxford University Press, 1987).
   

7. Studs Terkel,
   Working: People Talk About What They Do All Day and How They Feel About What They Do
   (New York: Pantheon Books, 1974), p. 301.
   

8. Carabillo, Meuli, Csida,
   Feminist Chronicles,
   p. 48.
   

31. Ibid., p. 50.

1. Cartoon reproduced in
   Newsweek,
   December 20, 1999, p. 72.
   

2. Kingsley Davis, “Wives and Work: A Theory of the Sex-Role Revolution and Its Consequences,” in
   Feminism, Children, and the New Families,
   ed. Sanford M. Dornbusch and Myra H. Strober (New York: Guilford Publications, Inc., 1988), p. 68; and Myra H. Strober and Agnes Miling Kaneko Chan,
   The Road Winds Uphill All the Way: Gender
   

   Work and Family in the United States and Japan
   (Cambridge, Massachusetts, and London: MIT Press, 1999), p. xiv.
   

3. Chafe,
   The Paradox,
   p. 212.
   

4. This section is indebted to Rosen,
   The World Split Open,
   pp. 152–155.
   

5. William H. Masters and Virginia E. Johnson,
   Human Sexual Response
   (Boston: Little, Brown, 1966), and Masters and Johnson,
   Human Sexual Inadequacy
   (Boston: Lit- tle, Brown, 1970).
   

6. Marilyn Yalom, Wenda Brewster, and Suzanne Estler (1981), “Women of the Fifties: Their Past Sexual Experiences and Current Sexual Attitudes in the Context of Mother/Daughter Relationships,”
   Sex Roles: A Journal of Research
   7 (9), pp. 877–888. See also Marilyn Yalom, Suzanne Estler, and Wenda Brewster (1982), “Changes in Female Sexuality: A Study of Mother/Daughter Communication and Generational Dif- ferences.”
   Psychology of Women Quarterly
   7 (2), pp. 141–154.
   

7. Linda Wolfe,
   Women and Sex in the 80s: The Cosmo Report
   (Toronto, New York, London, Sydney: Bantam Books, 1982).
   

8. Myra H. Strober, “Two-Earner Families,” and Davis, “Wives and Work,” in
   Fem- inism,
   ed. Dornbusch and Strober, pp. 161 and 68.
   

9. Rhona Rapoport and Robert Rapoport, “The Dual Career Family,”
   Human Rela- tions
   22, 1969, pp. 3–30. See also
   Dual-Career Couples,
   ed. Fran Pepitone-Rockwell (Beverly Hills and London: Sage Publications, 1980), pp. 14–15.
   

10. See appendix to Arlie Hochschild,
    The Second Shift: Working Parents and the Rev- olution at Home
    (New York: Avon, 1989), pp. 271–278.
    

11. Dana Vannoy-Hiller and William W. Philliber,
    Equal Partners: Successful Women in Marriage
    (Newbury Park, London, New Delhi: Sage Publications, 1989), p. 107.
    

12. Frances K. Goldschneider and Linda J. Waite,
    New Families, No Families?
    

    (Berkeley: University of California Press, 1991), p. 129.
    

13. Strober and Chan,
    The Road,
    p. 205.
    

14. Ruthellen Josselson,
    Revising Herself: The Story of Women’s Identity from College to Midlife
    (New York and Oxford: Oxford University Press, 1996), pp. 200–202.
    

15. Strober and Chan,
    The Road,
    pp. 94 and 103. 47. Ibid., pp. 98–99.
    

48. Ibid., p. 101.

49. Ibid., p. 222.

1. Stephanie Coontz,
   The Way We Really Are
   (New York: Basic Books, 1997), p. 58.
   

2. Rosanna Hertz,
   More Equal than Others: Women and Men in Dual-Career Mar- riages
   (Berkeley, Los Angeles, London: University of California Press), 1986, p. 101.
   

3. Strober and Chan,
   The Road,
   p. 87.
   

4. David Elkind,
   Ties That Stress: The New Family Imbalance
   (Cambridge, Massa- chusetts, and London: Cambridge University Press, 1994), p. 51.
   

5. Wellesley,
   Winter 2000, p. 25.
   

6. Cynthia Fuchs Epstein,
   Woman’s Place: Options and Limits in Professional Careers
   

   (Berkeley, Los Angeles, London: University of California Press, 1971), p. 57.
   

7. Vannoy-Hiller and Philliber,
   Equal Partners,
   pp. 16–17.
   

8. Susan Faludi,
   Backlash: the Undeclared War Against American Women
   (New York: Crown Publishers, Inc., 1992).
   

9. Rosen,
   The World Split Open,
   p. xv.
   

10. See, for example, Komarovsky,
    Blue-Collar Marriage,
    pp. 94–111.
    

11. Janice M. Steil,
    Marital Equality: Its Relationship to the Well-Being of Husbands and Wives
    (Thousand Oaks, London, New Delhi: Sage Publications, 1997), p. xix. See also differences in his and her appraisals of marriage in Alford-Cooper,
    For Keeps,
    p. 107.
    

12. Faludi,
    Backlash,
    pp. 17, 36–37.
    

13. Richard R. Peterson, “A Re-Evaluation of the Economic Consequences of Divorce,”
    American Sociological Review
    , Vol. 61, No. 3, June 1996, pp. 528–536.
    

14. Susan Straight, “One Drip at a Time,” in
    Mothers Who Think: Tales of Real-Live Parenthood,
    ed. Camille Peri and Kate Moses (New York: Villard Books, 1999), pp. 50, 51, 55. For a sensitive appraisal of divorce in America, see Barbara Defoe Whitehead,
    The Divorce Culture: Rethinking Our Commitments to Marriage and Family
    (New York: Vintage Books, 1998).
    

15. Faludi,
    Backlash,
    p. 16.
    

16. Boston Globe,
    May 13, 2000, A19, citing the work of economist Jane Waldfogel of Columbia University.
    

17. Henry A. Walker, “Black-White Differences in Marriage and Family Patterns,” in
    Feminism,
    ed. Dornbusch and Strober, pp. 87–112.
    

18. Margaret L. Usdansky, “Numbers Show Families Growing Closer as They Pull Apart,”
    New York Times,
    March 8, 2000, D10.
    

19. Walker, “Black-White Differences,” in
    Feminism,
    ed. Dornbusch and Strober, pp. 92–93.
    

20. Peggy Orenstein,
    Flux: Women on Sex, Work, Kids, Love, and Life in a Half- Changed World
    (New York: Doubleday, 2000), p. 39.
    

21. This paragraph draws from Susan Turk Charles and Laura L. Carstensen, “Mar- riage in Old Age,” in
    Inside the American Couple
    , ed. Marilyn Yalom and Laura Carstensen (Berkeley: University of California Press, forthcoming).