A Home for Haley (20 page)

Ryan shook his head, then grinned
and rested his cheek on Ethan’s shoulder. Haley reached for him, but he shoved
her hand away. “
My
daddy.”

She dropped her arms, her good mood
taking a steep dive. She totally understood why Ryan adored this man, because
Ethan was kind and loving and who in the world could resist him? But it was
still hard to hear her son call him daddy. She knew in her head it shouldn’t
bother her, but her heart hadn’t quite caught up, which surprised her because
after spending this evening in Ethan’s arms, she felt like a different woman. Obviously
that wasn’t the case.

Haley’s heart took another dive as
realization hit her that there was a good chance the kids would get hurt if she
and Ethan got involved and it didn’t work out. She rubbed her forehead. Who was
she kidding? They were already involved, and if things fell apart between them,
the children would suffer, especially Kayla who was still reeling from her
mother’s recent behavior. It frightened Haley to consider how badly the
children might get hurt.

She watched Ethan rub Ryan’s back
with slow, smooth circles, almost putting her son in a trance. She smiled at
Ryan, understanding his feelings, because she felt the same way in this man’s
arms. Cared for and safe.

Kayla raced through the kitchen and
jerked open the back door. “Come on, Maggie.” The pup raced outside and down
the deck’s stairs. It only took her a minute to do her business, then she ran
back into the house and greeted everyone.

“I think she missed me.” Kayla sat
on the floor and hugged the dog to her.

“I’m sure she did,” Haley answered.
“But she and I still had a nice time.”

“That’s because she knows you love
her.”

Haley smoothed a hand over Kayla’s
dark hair. “She certainly does. She also knows I’m a softie.”

Kayla grinned. “Everyone knows
that
.”

Haley’s chest filled with emotion.
“I think you’re trying to butter me up, young lady.”

Kayla shook her head. “No I’m not.”
She grinned at Haley. “But did you know my birthday is in a few weeks?”

“I had no idea,” Haley responded,
truly surprised.

Kayla grinned. “I’ll be six. I get
to go to first grade this year.”

“Wow. You’ll be reading before we
know it. So what does an almost- first grader want for her birthday?”

Kayla’s face fell. “I want Mommy to
come home.”

Tension filled the room and Haley struggled
to find something to say. Ethan set Ryan down and squatted beside his daughter.
Kayla watched him, her face solemn. “We will invite her, Kayla, but I doubt she
will come so try not to get your hopes up.” Kayla’s face fell even more.
“Besides inviting your mother, what would you like to do for your birthday?
Your wish is my command,” he added with a wink. “After all, you only turn six
once.”

Kayla rested a hand on Maggie’s
head, and the puppy licked her face, instinctively knowing her mistress was
upset. “It won’t be fun without Mama.”

Ethan’s brows knit. “Of course it
will be fun. We will make your birthday special, no matter what.”

Kayla didn’t respond, and Haley’s
heart wrenched, both for Ethan and this precious little girl who yearned for
her mother so badly. Haley wished she could reach out to Ethan, offer some
support, but she had to be careful what she said and did around his family.
Besides, she was so out of her element here, and Ethan knew what he was doing.
His therapist had talked to him about this sort of thing.

Ethan tucked a finger under Kayla’s
chin and forced her to look at him. “We’ll call your mom when you’re ready for
bed tonight, but I want you to be prepared.”

Kayla raced out of the room. Both
the puppy and Ryan ran after her.

Ethan stood and squeezed the bridge
of his nose. “Damn. She refuses to hear what I’m saying. Sure wish I could have
forbidden her to invite her mom, but then she’d blame me for the rest of her
life for running Ellie off. She already does in a way.”

“I’d like to get hold of that woman
and wring her skinny neck,” Dottie said, leaning over and patting Ethan’s hand.
“You handled that well. Kayla can’t hang on to her false hope forever, but it
sure is hard to watch. I think on some level she heard you, or she wouldn’t
have taken off like she did.” With a heavy sigh, Dottie shoved to her feet.
“I’m going to my room and collapsing.”

Aunt Jo gave Ethan a hug. “I agree
with everything my sister said.”

“That’s a first,” Dottie called
back over her shoulder.

Smiling, Aunt Jo followed her
sister down the hall.

Ethan glanced at Haley. “Bet you
never dreamed you would be smack in the middle of a soap opera when you took
this job.”

“It’s definitely a mess,” she
admitted. “I grew up in a pretty dysfunctional family, but your ex-wife is in a
league all her own.” Her father was in another league all his own, but she kept
that to herself.

“It’s embarrassing I ever got
involved with Ellie, let alone married her.” Ethan wrapped an arm around
Haley’s shoulders. “Guess I never fully realized how lucky I was to have the
family I do. I almost feel guilty. And I hate like hell that Kayla has such a
pitiful excuse for a mom.”

Haley leaned into him. “She has a
great dad and a terrific grandmother, though.”

Ethan pulled her snug. “Thanks.” He
blew out a tired breath. “Guess we’d better go check on the kids before they
get into trouble.”

“I’ll go. Ryan’s the one we really
have to watch. He’s probably hanging from the curtains by now.”

“You say that like it’s a horrible
problem. Right now that seems like a pretty trivial thing.”

“I’ll remind you of that if anything’s
broken.” Ethan barely smiled, and Haley couldn’t resist wrapping her arms
around him.

He pulled her close. “Thanks for
your support.”

“Everything will somehow work out,
Ethan.” She hoped she was right. Kayla had way too much heartache for any
five-year-old to have to deal with, but Haley trusted Ethan to guide his
daughter through this with the least amount of damage.

She made herself step away from Ethan’s
touch. “We shouldn’t let the children see us embrace. It’s way too soon.”

He ran a hand through his hair and
let his arm drop. “You’re right. Hands off unless we’re alone.”

There was an awkward silence. Haley
cleared her throat. “Guess I’d better go make sure Ryan is behaving himself.”
Without waiting for a reply, she hurried out of the kitchen.

****

Ethan cursed as he watched Haley
hurry away. He should have known better than to hold her like that when the
kids were anywhere around. His mind was reeling so much from Kayla’s request
that he doubted he could think his way out of a paper sack right now. He turned
and gathered the plates, still full of spaghetti, put foil over each one and
stuck them both in the refrigerator. He’d lost his appetite along with his
common sense.

He had to pull it together. What
had he been thinking holding Haley close when one of the kids could have walked
in on them? Hell, he’d even forgotten Kayla had a birthday coming up. What kind
of dad forgets that? A dad preoccupied with a sexy, blonde. That’s what kind.

His mom would have never let him
forget Kayla’s birthday, but she shouldn’t have to remind him of something that
important. He had to get his head back on straight, but he wasn’t sure how he
would accomplish that. Haley had an effect on him that no other woman had ever
had, especially Ellie. Sure the sex had been dynamite with his ex, at least at
the beginning, but they’d never connected on any other level. He’d been too
young and dumb to realize that until now, but it was true. He and Haley, on the
other hand, connected on every level and it blew him away.

He set his left-over cold coffee
into the microwave and nuked it. This evening with Haley had been wonderful, more
than wonderful, but he had to keep this in perspective. Providing a loving and
stable environment for Kayla was his top priority and always would be.

He would not fail his daughter like
her mother had. With a curse, he tamped down his raging hormones and headed out
to join the kids and Haley in the den.

“I have some news,” Dottie
announced a few days later at breakfast.

What now
? Ethan thought, as
he scooped his eggs onto a plate. The last few days had been difficult enough
and right now he didn’t want even more change. But the gleam in his mom’s eye let
him know something was amiss.

“Well, spit it out, Mom, before you
burst.”

“I think you’ve put up with me long
enough, and I miss my friends and home. Besides, I’m doing well enough with my
knee to be on my own.”

Ethan opened his mouth to say
something, but she held up her hand. “I can’t tell you how much I appreciate
all the help you’ve given me, Ethan, but it’s time for me to get back to my own
life.”

Kayla jumped up from her chair and
latched onto her grandmother, burying her head in her bosom. “I don’t want you
to go.”

“Ditto that.” Ethan grabbed his
plate of eggs and sat down just as Haley and Ryan walked in.

“Why does everyone look so glum?”
Haley asked.

“Grandma’s leaving.” Kayla looked
totally heart broken, and Ethan had a hard time swallowing his bite of eggs.

“Where are you going, Dottie?”
Haley asked, sitting on the bench with Ryan on her lap.

“Home.” Dottie stroked Kayla’s hair.
“I will be back often, honey, and you can come see me anytime you want. I mean
that.”

Kayla sniffed. “But I want you
here.”

Dottie glanced at Ethan, her face
drawn. “And part of me wants to stay with you, but my surgery is over and my
knee is pretty good, and I’m ready to get back to my own home.”

Kayla looked at the floor, her
lower lip trembling. Part of Ethan was angry that his mom chose now to leave.
Didn’t she see that her granddaughter needed all the support she could give her?
He scooted back from the table and reached for Kayla, pulling her onto his lap.
“We’ll see your grandmother a lot. Definitely for your birthday party. And
don’t forget Uncle Matt and I are building a house out on the ranch. Your
grandmother only lives a few minutes from there.”

Kayla let out a long, drawn-out
breath. “You never work on the house, so we’ll never get moved out there.”

“Maybe we could speed it up. Hire
some help.”

“Kayla, I promise you will see me a
lot.” Dottie smiled at her granddaughter. “And I wouldn’t miss your birthday
party for the world. I promise once I’m settled I will come get you for an
overnighter. Just the two of us.”

“Okay,” Kayla responded with a small
smile. “Can I bring Maggie?”

“Of course you can.” Kayla laid her
head on her dad’s shoulder. “We still haven’t heard back from Mommy.”

Surprise, surprise,
Ethan
thought. Thank goodness he’d shot straight about that with Kayla. “I’m sorry,
honey.” He glanced at Haley, who watched Kayla, a frown creasing her brow. “I
bet Haley would drive you into Crystal Springs anytime you want to see your
grandma.”

“I’ll be in school all day before
long.” Kayla kicked the leg of the table with her toe. Ethan grabbed her foot
and held it still.

Haley reached out and ran a hand
down Kayla’s leg. “Ryan will miss you when you’re at school,” she said. “But
I’ll make sure he understands that you are in school and will be back, just
like your grandmother will be back to see you.” Kayla pulled her brows
together, but remained quiet.

“I’ve been thinking about your
birthday,” Haley said, standing and plopping Ryan in his high chair. “What do
you think about having a carnival at the dude ranch? We could have pony rides
and bob for apples and play all kinds of games.”

Kayla’s eyes widened. “Could we do
a three-legged race? And can I bring Maggie?”

“Absolutely,” Haley and Ethan said
at the same time.

“I’ll bake the cake,” Dottie
volunteered. “I think a puppy cake would be fun. What do you think, Kayla?”

Kayla face brightened. “How many
friends can I invite?”

Ethan smiled. Hell, as far as he
was concerned, she could invite the whole town. He winked at Haley and she
blushed. “How about ten?” he asked.

Kayla’s grin widened. “Yippee. Ryan
can come too, but I don’t think he would be good at a three-legged race.”

“I think you’re right about that.”
Haley poured some cheerios onto the tray of Ryan’s highchair. “You and I can
plan it all out.”

Ethan wished he could grab Haley up
and kiss her. He might just give her a bonus for saving the day. She deserved
it. Of course, what he really wanted to do was lock her in his bedroom all
night and make love to her until they were both exhausted. He sighed with
frustration. It had been a long and frustrating week, and they had both been
tense, even distant with one another. He didn’t like it one bit, and he needed
to figure out how to get some private time with her.

“Daddy?”

Ethan blinked and came back to the
present. “What honey?”

“Could everyone spend the night at
the ranch?”

He automatically shook his head. “I
don’t think there’s room. We’ve been pretty booked. But it’ll still be fun.
Something tells me Haley knows how to plan a party for kids.”

Haley laughed. “I did teach first
grade, but we only had classroom parties. I think I’ll need Kayla’s help
planning her party.”

Dottie stood with her empty plate.
“Something tells me your birthday bash will be a huge hit, Kayla. I think we
should include the rest of the family. Everyone will want to be part of the
celebration.”

Kayla clapped her hands. “I’ll get
to see Aunt Francie’s and Uncle Matt’s baby. She’s sooooo cute!”

Ethan winked at Haley and she
blushed again. He loved that about her. She was probably the only woman he’d
ever known who blushed like an innocent virgin, but turned into a tigress in the
bedroom. His groin tightened. He stood and began clearing his breakfast dishes.
“I need to get to work.” He leaned down and kissed both Kayla and Ryan, then squeezed
Haley’s shoulder before heading to the sink where his mom was already loading
the dishwasher.

“I’ll get that, Mother.”

“I’m making myself useful, so
you’ll be more inclined to invite me back.” She snatched his dirty plate.

“Why didn’t you think of that a
long time ago?” he responded, giving his mom a quick kiss on the cheek and
turning to go, all but knocking Haley down. “Whoa,” he said grabbing her
shoulders. “Didn’t mean to stampede you.”

Their gazes locked, and heat
encased him. He cleared his throat. “Thanks for the great party idea, Haley.
You’re the best.” Grinning, he stepped around her, skimming his hand along her
arm. He heard her quick intake of breath.
Good. Glad to know he wasn’t the
only one getting desperate.

He picked up Kayla. “Have fun
planning your party. I’ll see you this evening.” Giving her a big bear hug, he
set her down. She skipped out of the room and he smiled after her. “Looks like
you saved the day, Haley.”

“I’m glad she liked my idea. It
sounded fun to me, but I’m not an almost-six year old.”

Dottie walked past them. “I’m going
to start packing. I grabbed some boxes from the garage earlier.”

“Don’t try and carry anything
downstairs, Mom. I’ll get it later this evening. When are you planning on
deserting us?”

She rolled her eyes. “In a couple
of days. I’m eager to get home and see those other two granddaughters of mine.”

“And Amos?” Ethan couldn’t help but
ask.

She gave him a ‘don’t mess with me’
look and marched out of the kitchen.

Grinning, Ethan turned to Haley,
who had picked up Ryan. “She’s eager to see more than her other granddaughters.”

“You can’t blame her,” Haley said,
smiling.

“I know I have no room to tease
her, but I couldn’t resist,” Ethan said with a wicked grin.

Ryan leaned toward him and Ethan
took the toddler, gave him a kiss and big hug, and then set him down. “You’d
better go find Kayla and Maggie.” With a squeal, Ryan raced out of the kitchen
calling for them. “Thank God my strategy worked.” Before Haley could protest,
he leaned in and kissed her.

A few minutes later they came up
for air. She stepped away, and he ran a finger down her cheek. “So much for a
quick kiss.”

She smoothed her hair behind an ear
with an unsteady hand. “Behave yourself before we get caught.”

“Sorry. I can’t think straight
where you’re concerned. We need some alone time, Haley. Maybe after Mom’s gone,
we can figure something out. I have a lock on my door, and we can bring the
baby monitor into the room in case Ryan wakes up. Kayla sleeps through the
night unless she’s sick.”

“The puppy doesn’t, and she
sometimes wakes Kayla. You, on the other hand, sleep like the dead.”

Ethan winced. “So you’ve said. We’ll
take Maggie out to do her business before we lock ourselves in my bedroom.”

Haley pulled her hair up and away
from her neck and sighed. “You sure know how to make things difficult.”

“My plan is not difficult.”

“That’s not what I meant and you
know it.”

He grinned. “If we were married,
we’d still have to lock our door.”

She poked him in the chest with her
forefinger. “But we’re not married, and we’re nowhere close to even talking
about that, let alone doing it. Kayla needs stability right now.”

He grabbed her arm and pulled her
against him. The woman drove him crazy with need and fried his brain. Not a
good combination. “What better way to give both the kids stability than for us to
get married?”

She frowned and stepped back. “It’s
too soon.
Way
too soon.”

“Not for me it isn’t.” She looked
ready to bolt, and he couldn’t blame her. He’d surprised even himself with that
remark, but he knew what he wanted and he wanted Haley. Obviously she didn’t
feel the same way.

“It’s not that I don’t care,” she
said. “You know I do.”

“Yeah, I know,” he responded,
hoping it was true. He picked up his brief case. “I should get to work. I have
a meeting this morning, and I need to prepare for it.” He turned and headed for
the back door, hoping she might stop him but she didn’t say a word. He stepped
outside, feeling up in the air where Haley was concerned, and not liking it one
bit.

****

Haley fought back frustration as
the door shut behind Ethan.
Married? Seriously
? He’d sure shocked the
hell out of her with that. True, they knew each other pretty well. After all,
she lived with the man, but married? She sank onto a chair, rested an elbow on
the kitchen table and her chin on her hand.

How in the world was she supposed
to handle this? She had assumed they would continue to sneak in time for themselves
and even go out on a date from time to time, take things slowly and see how
they felt down the road. That’s certainly how she’d seen their new-found status
playing out. She hadn’t looked far enough down the road to even contemplate
marriage. Why would she? Their relationship was just getting off the ground.

She let out a huge sigh. God knows
there was certainly attraction, big-time attraction. And she liked him.
Really
liked him. He was a great dad and he treated her son with kindness and
affection. And the way he treated her made her yearn to call him up right now
and tell him she was sorry for how she’d reacted. But she wouldn’t call him. Her
reaction had been honest and she couldn’t shake it, so she wasn’t sure what she
could say to Ethan to make things right again.

She thought back over her and Dale’s
courtship. They had dated for two years before he’d popped the question. Their
relationship had been as steady as a rock. Sure, there might not have been the
fireworks that she and Ethan had, but she had never doubted that Dale loved
her. Or would take care of her. Tears filled her eyes as she admitted to
herself for the first time that he hadn’t taken care of her. He’d gone and
gotten himself killed doing what he loved best, being a fighter pilot. His
first love had always been flying planes. The realization that she had never
been the top priority for Dale hit her hard.

He’d left for his third tour of
duty knowing she was pregnant. How could he have done that? Tears filled her
eyes and her stomach took a nose dive. She forced herself to quit thinking
about what she couldn’t change, and instead focus on what she had some
influence on—her tumultuous relationship with Ethan.

Their relationship was everything
she used to dream about when she’d been young, but those day dreams had stopped
when she’d met Dale. She’d thought he’d given her everything she needed. Now
she had to admit that wasn’t true. Compared to what she felt for Ethan, Dale
sometimes came up short, and admitting that had more pain slicing through her.
Even though she and Dale had dated for two years and knew each other pretty
well, she still hadn’t known him as well as she’d thought. She couldn’t believe
it had taken her this long to realize that. She’d been naïve and desperate to
get away from her parents, and Dale had felt safe and secure. She had loved him
and he had loved her, but he hadn’t stepped up to the plate when she’d become
pregnant. He’d left, like he always left.

She buried her face in her hands
and cried, wishing she’d never figured this out and wondering if anyone ever
knew someone else very well. Maybe there was always a part of yourself you held
so close to your heart that people could never see the whole of who you were.

Ethan obviously did not see her
needs very well, and she supposed she didn’t see his either, or at least had
chosen to ignore them until now. She swallowed back tears because what she
wanted more than anything was to know all of Ethan, understand his needs and
wants. She also yearned for him to know all of her, and that was more than a
little scary.
She felt certain she’d hurt his feelings earlier, even
though she hadn’t meant to. She owed him an explanation for her reaction.