A Husband's Regret (The Unwanted Series) (18 page)

Bryce groaned the following morning, when his boisterous twenty-one-month-old daughter bounced her way onto his bed at some ungodly hour. One sharp little knee narrowly missed his groin to land painfully on his abdomen, causing him to curse softly under his breath as he doubled over in pain.

“Kayla, honey, why don’t you go find your mummy? It’s her day off today.” He caught her to stop her bouncing and planted a quick kiss on her soft cheek. She giggled at the feel of his stubble.

“Tickley.” She formed the word clearly as she rubbed her cheek squeamishly.

“Go and wake Mummy up, sweetheart; Daddy’s trying to sleep. I’ll give you some sweeties if you go to your mummy!” He cajoled.

“See fishies.” He frowned at that bit of information, wondering what the hell he was missing in translation. He often had trouble with voiced and unvoiced consonants, but he doubted very much that she meant “vishies,” so the word
had
to be “fishies,” which confused the hell out of him.

“What?”

“Fishies, Daddy, see
fishies
!” She made a squirmy, fishlike movement with one of her plump hands. Okay, so he definitely hadn’t misread the “fishies.”

“Where’s your mummy?” He kept her still when it became obvious that she wanted to bounce again.

“There,” she pointed to his bedroom door, the dimple she’d inherited from him deepening as her smile widened. He looked up to find Bronwyn standing in the open doorway. Well that certainly explained how Kayla had gotten into his room; she wasn’t tall enough to open doors yet. Bronwyn was leaning against the doorjamb with her arms folded over her chest and her eyebrows raised.

“Don’t think I missed that blatant bit of bribery just now,” she said, and he groaned.

“C’mon, Bron, you know the weekends are your domain. I didn’t want to rob you of any time with our precious little
angel
. It wouldn’t be fair to you,” he quickly smooth-talked, but she wasn’t having any of it and he could practically hear her
hah!
Their high-strung “angel” of a daughter had escaped his grip and was jumping on the bouncy mattress again, her curls flying as she chanted, “Fishies, fishies” with every bounce. Bryce grimaced as he read her lips.

“What’s all this about ‘fishies’?” he asked, feeling ridiculous as he said the word. He glanced up and caught Bronwyn staring at his naked chest. She blushed when he caught her staring and took a few seconds to gather her thoughts before responding.

“Uh . . . I’m taking her to the aquarium today and was wondering if you’d like to join us.” He blinked up at her, wondering if he had read that right.

“What?”

She repeated the question, using her eloquent hands this time, and he blinked again, more than a little shocked by the unexpected invitation. Her blush deepened and she started to say that he didn’t have to if he didn’t want to, but he quickly brushed that aside before she changed her mind completely.

“Sure! I’ve never been! That would be great! Kayla will love it!” He knew he was speaking in exclamations but he didn’t want any misunderstanding. “Give me ten minutes and we can head off.” He jumped out of bed, forgetting that he was wearing nothing but skin and quickly grabbed a sheet to preserve modesty when he felt a breeze on areas best kept covered in the presence of his little girl and his estranged wife. Tucking the sheet in at his waist, he grabbed Kayla while she was in midjump and hugged her to his chest, twirling her around for a couple of seconds. “We’re going to see the fishies, baby!” He dropped a kiss on the toddler’s cheek before setting her down, where she tottered dizzily before plonking down onto her butt. She laughed happily after the dizziness passed and held up her arms to him for another round.

“Not now, sweetie. I have to shower and then we’re going to see all the pretty fishies.”

“Nebo?” she asked worriedly, and he grinned at the thought of the Disney movie that she insisted on watching at
least
five times a week, with her daddy of course! Bryce was thankful for the subtitle option on DVDs and never thought he’d be the type to recite the dialogue of a cartoon movie word for word in his lifetime.

“Yes, Nemo too,” he promised. “I’ll be quick,” he told Bron on his way out.

“No rush.” She smiled. “I still have to get Kayla ready. We can leave in about half an hour.”

Bronwyn watched him leave, his broad tanned back rippling with muscles, the sheet molding his tight behind much too lovingly. Her mouth went dry as she recalled that flash of nudity; he was so gorgeous that it was a real shame to cover it up. She grinned as she recalled his near schoolboy giddiness at her impulsive invitation. She hadn’t seen him that lighthearted and ecstatic in, well,
ever
really. Even before her pregnancy when they had been happy together, there had always been this reserve in him, a darkness that he had tried to keep hidden from her. She had always believed that it would only be a matter of time before he confided in her but then she had gotten pregnant and they had run out of time. She sighed at the dark turn of her thoughts; it was too bright and beautiful an autumn day to dwell on the past.

“Come on, Kayla, time to get dressed.” She held out her hand to the toddler who happily made her way over, still chattering excitedly about “Nebo” and “fishies.”

The Two Oceans Aquarium was based at the V&A Waterfront in Cape Town. It was teeming not only with marine life but with children, teens, students, and noisy families. Bryce and Bronwyn, as a young couple with an energetic toddler, blended in completely. For once the ubiquitous Cal and his team had been told to remain very much in the background. Bryce had commanded them to remain outside, despite Cal’s obvious uneasiness with the high security risk such a busy place posed. Bryce had even chosen to drive them himself—a rarity these days—while the security team had remained a discreet distance behind them.

Now Bronwyn was achingly aware of how much like a normal family they must look amidst the tide of humanity. Kayla was up on Bryce’s shoulders, and her little feet frantically paddled against his chest every time she wanted him to stop and let her down so that she could investigate something closer. She had loved the touch pool, where she got to stroke and touch all manner of tide-pool life: fish, starfish, and even a small octopus. She had squealed with every new sensation under her fingertips. Their little girl was nothing if not adventurous, and unlike a lot of the other children her age who backed off squealing and crying, she kept coming forward to touch something new. Of course, the highlight for her was the display of clownfish. The beautiful exhibit had actually been named “Nemos.” Bryce had guided her into the little bubble beneath the display, which had afforded her a 360-degree view of the tank. She had squealed and clapped in delight when she found herself surrounded by so many “Nemos.” It had been very difficult getting her back out to give other children a chance but she hadn’t had time to sulk with so much to see and do.

Bronwyn sensed that, despite his laughter, something was not quite right with Bryce. He seemed jumpy and sweat beaded his upper lip. She often caught him looking around frantically when she was farther away from him and then almost noticeably sagging in relief when he caught sight of her. At first she was confused by his uncharacteristic lack of composure, but then she caught the way he shrank away anytime someone brushed by him or got too close. With startling clarity, she recognized that her husband, who had once seemed so strong and infallible, feared the milling crowd of people around them. She even suspected that he was mildly agoraphobic. It explained why he had confined himself to the house these past couple of years, why he rarely ventured out, and why he preferred having Pierre or Rick come by to see him at home. This once social creature had been cut off from the world in more ways than she had known. It said a lot for how much her invitation must have meant to him, if he was willing to brave
this
for a day out with her and Kayla.

She made her way to his side and firmly slid her hand into his. His startled gaze met hers, and when he saw the understanding glimmering there, his eyes shone with gratitude.

“Do you want to go home?” she asked, and he hesitated before shaking his head.

“I’m okay . . . now.” He lifted their clasped hands gratefully.

Neither openly acknowledged the situation again, but she rarely left his side after that and he seemed less tense. He appeared to be genuinely enjoying himself by the time they reached the underwater tunnel that led them through a multitude of manta rays, barracudas, tuna, and ragged-toothed sharks. The display was so awesome that even Kayla went quiet as she took in the strange, beautiful blue world that surrounded her. Her little hands were clasped together under her father’s jaw and Bronwyn watched as she started to droop more and more until her head was resting on top of Bryce’s and she was fast asleep.

“Hold still,” she urged, digging out the digital camera and taking yet another picture of father and daughter. He grinned before taking the camera from her and stopping a passing tourist, asking the man to take their picture. He shifted Kayla so that she was cradled in his right arm, her head resting on the curve of his shoulder and her arm draped around his neck, and he hauled Bronwyn against his left side, wrapping his arm around her waist and holding her close.

“Smile, sweetheart,” he urged into her ear, and she was startled into obeying. The tourist took three pictures in quick succession before handing the camera back to Bryce.

“You have a great-looking family, mate,” he said in a thick Aussie accent before handing back the camera and heading off with a wave.

When they left the aquarium, Bryce pushed Kayla’s cart while Bronwyn tucked her hand into the crook of his elbow to maintain contact. Cal and his team were taking their brief to remain discreet so seriously that Bronwyn didn’t even see them. Bryce led the way toward one of the many restaurants dotting the waterfront, a Greek place that served fabulous food, and they sat down at a table beneath one of the umbrellas out in the early autumn sunshine. They were quiet for a while, watching the world go by, until Bryce broke the silence.

“Thank you.”

She lifted surprised eyes to his solemn face. “For?”

“Earlier.” He cleared his throat and she watched his Adam’s apple bob sexily as he swallowed. “Thank you for earlier. Crowds are . . . difficult for me. Ever since the accident I can’t stand being in large crowds. It’s so bizarre. There I am with all these people around me and I
know
there should be noise, voices, footsteps, and laughter, but instead there’s nothing. It’s like being in a huge void, until I’m jostled and then it feels like being ambushed because I didn’t see or hear it coming. After the accident I was so paranoid, I kept wondering who was behind me, kept
imagining
someone was there, and I’d turn around so quickly that I’d startle everyone around me, only there’d be no one there, but I’d immediately get the same feeling and turn again. I knew that it would only be a matter of time before it would get to the point where I’d just keep turning round and round and round until I went insane. So before that could happen I . . .”

“You shut yourself in,” she completed, and he nodded.

“It’s crazy, I know,” he confessed, and she smiled with a shake of her head, covering his lightly trembling hand with her own.

“No, it’s not. You lost one of your senses, Bryce. Naturally there’d be physical, mental, and emotional repercussions. I read that people go through the stages of grief after losing their hearing. Did you . . . did you
talk
to anyone after the accident?”

“You mean a psychiatrist?” he clarified dryly. “I was seeing one for nearly a year; it’s because of him that I was able to even
contemplate
coming out today. I was so much worse immediately after the accident and I very stubbornly refused to talk to anyone. Yes, I was in denial and furious that something like this could have happened to me, but I shoved it aside because I had something bigger to take care of. I was adamant that talking to shrinks could wait. But Pierre and Rick kind of forced my hand. They blackmailed me into seeing someone.”