A Most Unusual Governess (13 page)

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Authors: Amanda Grange

BOOK: A Most Unusual Governess
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She was brought out of her thoughts by Mr Haversage looking at her curiously and saying, 'Are you all right?'

'Mm? Oh yes, quite all right.'

You don't look all right,' he said. There was something almost satisfied about his expression as he said it.

'It's just that the basket's rather heavy,' she said, making an excuse.

Then you must let me carry it for you.' He made a move to take it out of her hand.

'No.' Sarah spoke more vehemently that she had intended. 'No. I can manage.'

'Sarah... ' said Mr Haversage.

There was something unpleasant about the way he said it.

'I don't think you should call me that.'

Why not?' He moved round so that he was standing in front of her. We're not at the Grange now. There's no need for either of us to pretend.'

'I don't know what you're talking about,' she retorted, moving round him.

But he caught her by the arm and pulled her towards him. You can't hide it from me, Sarah. There's no need. We both know what you feel for me - what we feel for each other.'

'I assure you you're mistaken,' said Sarah, trying to keep her voice even as she pulled herself free.

Why deny it? he asked, following her, just half a step behind. 'It's nothing to be ashamed of. We could have a lot of fun together, you and I.'

'I don't think I'd like your idea of fun.' Sarah quickened her step.

'Oh, but I assure you you would.'

'Get away from me,' said Sarah, dropping all pretence of any kind of normality. There was something very menacing about Mr Haversage and she wanted to get away from him as quickly as she could.

What? Before we've enjoyed each other?' he asked her, quickening his own step to match her own. 'Don't be a bloody little fool.'

He caught hold of her by the arm again and Sarah, seriously frightened now, swung out with the basket. It caught him a blow on the side. It was enough to make him loosen his hold. Then, seizing her opportunity she picked up her skirts and ran. But he was hot on her heels and he caught her again, swinging her round, and she was horrified at the change in his face. It was twisted and brutal. With a rising feeling of panic she struggled to get away from him, but he held her more tightly, and in desperation she lifted her foot and brought it cracking down in his own. It was enough to make him let go of her and she wrenched herself free. As she did so he caught at her arm but succeeded only in catching hold of her sleeve. She pulled away from him. The delicate muslin ripped, but it was a small price to pay for her freedom and, with the shoulder of her dress torn, Sarah made the most of her lead to get away.

She was a good runner, and had often indulged in races with her brothers out on the moors near her Derbyshire home, but she knew that she could not outrun Mr Haversage for ever. Although his foot was giving him some pain in the end he would catch her again. The road was her one hope of escape.

It was much quieter than the road from the Grange to the village, but still it was frequented, and as she fled from Mr Haversage she prayed that there would be some passing chaise or carriage.

Because if not, her immediate future looked grim...

* * * *

The week in London had not gone as well as Lord Randall had hoped. Although he had learnt that the radicals were being controlled by a person of influence, probably someone who knew Kent well, which had set his mind working in new directions, he still had not been able to forget about Sarah.

It was true that, once back in London amongst the familiar landmarks, and amongst those of his friends who had not left town for the summer, he had felt anew all the impossibilities of becoming attached to a governess. But his feelings for Sarah had remained unchanged. In fact, it was only when he had left the Grange that had begun to understand what an important part she played in his life. He had begun to learn things with Sarah that he had never known were possible. He had learnt that his nephews and niece responded to care and affection far more readily than they responded to endless discipline; he had learnt that he could not pigeon-hole people, and that not all governesses were humble and eager to please, and that it was a good thing they were not - he had learnt that it was not necessarily a bad thing if someone stood up to him; he had learnt that it was possible for him to have tender feelings, and to have them for a governess; and he had learnt that life was far more complicated than he had ever thought it could be.

So that now, as he returned to Watermead Grange, he was no nearer to solving the dilemma of his most unusual governess than he had been when he had left for London the week before.

Until he arrived back at the Grange he decided not to think any more about it. The day was fine and he was enjoying the journey. And so were the horses. The fierce heat of the earlier part of the summer had gone, to be replaced by cooler weather: perfect for tooling along the country roads that led to the Grange in the light and well-made curricle.

The horses, a well-matched pair of bays, sensed that they were nearing home and Lord Randall gave them their heads. Up ahead, just around a bend in the road, was the familiar ruined house that lay to the north of the estate, and once past there it would not be long before he turned into the impressive driveway that led to the Grange.

But as he negotiated the bend, slowing the horses with practised hands, all thought of the Grange was pushed out of his mind by the sight of a familiar figure running from the ruins and making for the road just ahead of him.

He saw her only from the back, but there was no mistaking who she was.

'Sarah!' he cried, bringing the horses to a halt and leaving them snorting and stamping as he jumped down from the curricle, looping the reins over a nearby boulder.

She turned to face him and his blood turned to ice. He had never seen her looking so distraught. Her hair was coming loose of its pins and her yellow muslin was ripped across the shoulder.

What happened?' he demanded, striding towards her and catching hold of her shoulders as he reached her.

She was so out of breath from running that she could not answer him, but she glanced over her shoulder, back towards the ruins, and he realised at once that someone was pursuing her.

A moment later Mr Haversage appeared, looking as Lord Randall had never seen him before. His face was contorted by a look of brutish violence, as though the civilised mask had been torn from his face to leave nothing but an animal behind.

'Haversage!' said Lord Randall grimly.

Mr Haversage slowed his step, hopping once or twice awkwardly before coming to a stop just inches away from Sarah.

With one firm movement James pulled her behind him, so that she was protected by his powerful frame.

What the devil is the meaning of this?' he demanded, his eyes starting to smoulder.

Mr Haversage gave Lord Randall a sly look before shrugging. 'Miss Davenport and I were just... having a little fun,' he said.

'Insolent cur!' James took a step forward as he felt Sarah stiffen behind him. He was seized with a passionate desire to wipe the twisted smile from Haversage's face with his fist, and it was only with the greatest difficulty that he remembered his position and managed to stop himself in time. No matter what the provocation he was not going to lower himself by brawling with a common tutor, a man who was not even a gentleman. You will see me as soon as you return to the Grange,' he said instead, in his most arrogant manner, before turning and helping Sarah into the curricle.

Her hand as he held it was trembling, and he was filled with a longing to still her trembling with caresses and soothing words.

1 don't think 111 be returning to the Grange,' said Mr Haversage defiantly. The post, I find, does not suit me.'

Lord Randall turned to him with a grim face.

You are guilty of assault, Haversage, and you will face me either in my capacity as your employer, or in my capacity as the local magistrate. The choice is yours.'

At this Mr Haversage's face darkened, but his insolence crumbled before Lord Randall's arrogance. Very well,' he muttered.

This was an evil day's work, Haversage,' said Lord Randall as he climbed into his curricle with one powerful thrust of his legs and took up the reins. 'It is one you will regret.'

'And so will you, my lord,' muttered Mr Haversage under his breath as the curricle pulled away from him. 'So will you.'

* * * *

As she rode along in the curricle beside Lord Randall, Sarah felt completely drained. Her emotions had been through a series of rapid changes, from fear and panic when Mr Haversage had attacked her, to warmth and relief when James had taken charge of the situation and dealt with it in his uniquely arrogant way.

Arrogance and high-handedness! She had spent much of her time at the Grange railing against them but she was forced to admit that they had their uses after all!

But now, she wondered, what must Lord Randall think of her?

She tried to tell herself that it did not matter what he thought, but she was disturbed to find that it did matter. It mattered very much. She wanted to explain to him, to make him understand.

She began hesitantly. 1 want you to know that I wasn't a party to -'

'Of course you weren't,' he snapped angrily, his anger, however, clearly directed at Mr Haversage and not at Sarah. 'How the dog had the audacity to suggest it I don't know.' He turned to look at her. 'Sarah,' he said more gently, 1 know you'd never be involved with someone like Haversage, and I know you would never go along with something like that. I'm only sorry that you had such a terrible experience. I hope Haversage hasn't put you off -' He stopped short, as if suddenly realising what he was saying. He corrected himself, and said, T hope Haversage hasn't put you off visiting the local beauty spots.'

'No,' said Sarah, as they turned into the drive. 'No, of course not. But I think the next time I have a day off I may not go out alone, all the same.' 'I will dismiss Haversage, of course. He broke off with a frown, for the first time questioning his high-handed nature. That is, if you wish it.' The words came out with difficulty, but still they came out, and Sarah knew what they must have cost him. For Lord Randall to resist taking other people's decisions for them was a change in him indeed. She knew how used he was to taking decisions concerning everyone around him, and she knew how used he was to never having them questioned. But here he was, questioning himself. She had been right when she thought he had changed. Although he would always have an arrogant streak in his nature - and arrogance had its uses, she was forced to admit - he respected her enough to realise that she was capable of taking her own decisions, and that she had a right to do so. But in this case, her decision matched his own.

Yes, I do wish it.' She hesitated. 1 don't think he's simply someone who took advantage of the situation. I think he may be unbalanced.'

He nodded. 1 think you may be right. I'll dismiss him as soon as he returns.' He thought for a moment. 'He may make difficulties. It's possible he may tell lies about what happened this afternoon, and blacken your character.'

'I'm not afraid of him,' said Sarah. 'Not any more. As soon as I saw you I knew I was safe.'

She would not have made such an admission if it had not been for the fact that she was still very shaken. But her words, direct and open, went straight to his heart. He had been longing to comfort her ever since he had seen her running out into the road, and he found that he could fight his feelings no more.

'Oh, to hell with this!' he said roughly, and passing the reins into his left hand he drew her towards him with his right, putting his arm around her and cradling her trembling form against his own firm body.

Sarah gave a deep sigh and relaxed against him. The last traces of the fear that had gripped her at the ruins dissolved. But the trembling did not stop. Because now it was caused by something other than fear...

She turned up her face to his.

He looked down into her eyes, longing to kiss her and, in a moment of madness, giving way to that longing. He retained just enough control to make sure he brushed only her cheek with his kiss, reminding himself over and over again that she was a governess and he was her employer, and that it would be unforgivable of him to take advantage of her; and it was only this that stopped him from giving way to his feelings altogether and kissing her beautiful lips.

Sarah, feeling that she had emerged from a nightmare to find herself in a dream, nestled closer to him.

It could not last, this moment. It was out of time; unreal; prompted by Mr Haversage's unpardonable behaviour. But for one moment she allowed herself to imagine what it would be like if she and James had been equals, and the thought made her heart turn over.

But they were not equals, she reminded herself with a sinking of her spirits as the Grange came into sight. They were earl and governess. And Lord Randall would never forget it.

Slowly he released her, and she was conscious of an emptiness she had not known before. Reluctantly she pulled away from him, putting her dreams aside.

With light hands he slowed the horses until the curricle had come to a stop.

The eyes he turned on her were unreadable. If we return to the stables together, with your dress torn -'

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