A Mother's Courage (15 page)

Eloise sank down on the bed to cuddle Joss and
Beth, rocking them in her arms. 'We'll get
through this, my darlings. Mama will make
everything better, you'll see.'

Supper was served, as Queenie had promised,
promptly at seven o'clock. Eloise took her seat at
table, with Beth on her knee and Joss sitting on a
pile of cushions at her side. The dining table
would have seated ten quite comfortably, but to
her relief there were only two of the residents
present on this particular evening. One was an
elderly gentleman who was obviously extremely
deaf, but even with the use of an ear trumpet it
was clear that he could barely make out what
Annie was saying when she yelled at him. She
seemed to be the maid of all work and came
tottering in with a large tureen of soup. She
served the elderly gentleman first. 'It's oxtail
soup, Mr Wallace,' she shouted into his ear
trumpet. 'Eat up. Eat up.'

'Eh, what did you say?' Mr Wallace demanded
crossly. 'Speak up, girl, don't mumble.'

'Daft old bugger,' Annie muttered, slopping
soup into the plate of the bespectacled gentleman
sitting at the far end of the table. His starched
wing collar and shiny black suit suggested to
Eloise that he held some kind of clerical position,
but he seemed very reserved and did not speak
at all unless spoken to. He did not even complain
when Annie spilt some of the soup on his hand;
he merely gave her a reproachful look and wiped
it off on his table napkin.

'Soup for you, missis?' Annie demanded,
hovering at Eloise's side with the tureen.

'Yes, please, and just a little for Joss.'

'You could sop some of it up on a bit of bread
for the babe,' Annie said, eyeing Beth with
interest. 'I used to feed the little 'uns when I was
in the Foundling Hospital. I'm good with babies,
I am.'

'I'm sure you are,' Eloise said, smiling at this
proud statement. 'How old are you, Annie?'

'I ain't too sure, but I think I might be ten or
thereabouts. I was left on the doorstep, I was.
Another hour and they said I would have froze to
death, but I'm a tough 'un – it would take more
than that to kill me. I've had measles, mumps and
scarlet fever and I'm still here to tell the tale.'

'Well, you're very lucky then,' Eloise murmured,
dipping bread into the soup and feeding
it alternately to Joss and Beth. 'You must be
tough indeed, and I'm sure you work very hard
too.'

'That I do, missis.' Annie pulled out the chair
next to Eloise and sat down, warming to her
theme. 'I'm up at five and I light the fire in the
range. Then I cleans the grate in the fat old cow's
parlour, although don't let on that I called her
that, or she'll skin me alive. I help Cook with the
breakfasts and I clean the men's boots. I'm a real
slave, I am. Here, let me feed the baby while you
get some food inside you.' Without waiting for
an answer, Annie took a chunk of bread and
broke off tiny pieces, which she popped into
Beth's eager mouth. 'She's a pretty little thing.
What's her name?'

'Oy, you, girl.' Mr Wallace waved his ear
trumpet at her. 'I want some more soup.'

Annie waved back at him. 'Shut your gob, you
silly old goat.' She looked up at Eloise and
grinned. 'He's deaf as a post, but so long as I keep
smiling and let him pat me bum occasionally, it
keeps the old fool sweet.' She blew him a kiss.
'Daft old squit.'

'Annie, please,' Eloise murmured. 'Watch your
language in front of Joss; he's just learning to
talk.'

Annie wrinkled her snub nose and pulled a
face. 'He'll learn the bad words long afore he
learns to speak proper, but I'll try to watch me
mouth. I like you, missis. You talk to me like I
was a human being and not something what
someone scraped off the bottom of their shoe.
Not like her, the fat old crow. She beats me black
and blue if I don't do just what she says, but I get
me own back. I spit in her hot chocolate before I
gives it to her, and I put maggots in her mashed
taters. She's so blooming greedy that she
munches them up without even noticing.'

Eloise swallowed a mouthful of soup with
difficulty. She was so hungry that she would
have eaten almost anything, but surprisingly the
soup was very tasty. 'I hope you didn't. . .'

Annie threw back her head and roared with
laughter. 'Not for you, missis. I only does it to
them as gets on me wrong side.' She paled and
leapt to her feet as the door opened and Queenie
entered the room. 'I was just helping feed the
baby, missis.'

'That's not part of your job, you idle little slut.
Get back to the kitchen and help Cook serve up
the boiled haddock or it'll be the worse for you.'
Queenie's scowl dissolved into an ingratiating
smile as she glanced round the room. 'I hope
everything is to your satisfaction, gentlemen and
lady?'

'More soup,' roared Mr Wallace. 'I want more
soup.'

Queenie clipped Annie round the ear. 'Serve
Mr Wallace with more soup, and then go about
your duties.' She turned to Eloise. 'And you, Mrs
Cribb? I trust you are satisfied.'

'I am, thank you, but I have to say that the girl
was just being helpful.'

Queenie's bright smile vanished. 'She isn't
paid to be helpful to you; I pay her to do as I say.'

Later that evening, while Joss and Beth slept in
the bed at her side, Eloise lay wide awake. She
was exhausted, but her mind was racing round
in circles and sleep eluded her. Harcourt had
given her twenty pounds when she left Cribb's
Hall. She had thought it was generous and that it
would last her for several months at least, but it
was dwindling much faster than she could have
imagined possible. She knew that she would not
be able to afford Queenie King's prices for very
long, and that she would have to look for rooms
in a cheaper establishment. She must find work,
and she would need someone to mind the
children. Eloise lay, looking up at a maze of
cracks in the ceiling. Her life seemed like that
maze and she was stuck in the middle unable to
find the way out.

Next morning when she went into the dining
parlour, Eloise came face to face with the rest of
Queenie's lodgers. Apart from the two gentlemen
who had been at supper, there were six more
males of varying ages and differing occupations,
judging by the way in which they were dressed.
They mostly seemed to be commercial travellers
or clerks, but there were two who were garbed in
more practical attire, suggesting that they were
involved in some kind of manual labour.
Whatever their occupations, they had one thing in
common, and that was the way in which they
were applying themselves enthusiastically to
their meal of bacon, eggs and a small mountain of
toast. The room was filled with the sound of their
jaws champing on their food and a certain
amount of appreciative lip-smacking. They barely
looked up as Eloise took her seat at the table.
Apart from asking her to pass the toast or the
butter, no one spoke to her and she concentrated
on feeding the children. Annie brought in a plate
of scrambled eggs especially for Joss and Beth,
and when one of the men demanded the same she
slapped him on the back of his hand and told him
that this was food for the nippers and not for great
hulking men who worked on the railways. The
man subsided with a scowl and Eloise tried to
ignore the black looks he was sending in their
direction. She felt very uncomfortable and out of
place in this male domain, but Joss was obviously
fascinated by the variety of table manners
exhibited, from the bird-like pecking of the prim
office clerk in the shiny suit, whom Annie
addressed as Mr Potter, to the rather disgusting
slurping sounds made by a bald man with a shiny
pate who did not seem to have any teeth in his
head, and who dipped his bread in his tea and
then sucked it noisily. Joss was staring openmouthed
at the display, and Eloise was heartily
glad when the meal was over and the men filed
silently out of the room, leaving them alone with
a pile of dirty crockery and cutlery.

Annie came breezing in with a large wooden
tray and began clearing the table. 'So, what are
you going to do today, then?' she asked cheerfully.
'It's lovely and warm outside. I think
summer's come, although I don't see much of it
meself and it's bleeding hot working in the
kitchen with flies buzzing round your head. You
might think they're raisins in the spotted dick,
but I tell you, most of them is flies what fell in the
mixture. Don't eat nothing with raisins or
currants in, that's my advice.'

Eloise tried hard to keep a straight face. 'Thank
you, Annie. I'll bear that in mind.'

'I got a bit of time off this afternoon,' Annie
said, piling dishes onto her tray. 'I could take
little Joss for a walk to the Foundling Hospital if
you like. I always goes back there on me afternoon
off. There's a nice bit of grass, some big
trees, and flowers. It's like I imagine the country
might be, though I've never been there, but one
day I will. I made up me mind to it, I have. One
day I'll ride on a train and go into the countryside
and see fields and cows and pigs and such.
I've seen pictures of them in some of the
magazines the lodgers have in their rooms.' She
lifted the tray with difficulty and staggered out
of the room, calling over her shoulder, 'I'll see
you later then.'

Eloise was left feeling breathless, amused and
also rather sad to think that this child who had
had such a hard life could have such simple
dreams, which for her were almost unattainable.
As she wiped Joss's mouth and sticky hands and
then turned her attention to cleaning up Beth,
who had jam all over her face, Eloise thought of
her own pleasant childhood in the Dorset
vicarage. They had certainly not lived in luxury.
It had been a poor parish, and her father had had
no private income to supplement the meagre
salary of a country clergyman. It was a well
known fact that most of the clergy were younger
sons of the landed gentry, but Papa had come
from a more humble background and had
worked his way through theological college in
order to follow his calling. Eloise felt her throat
constrict as she thought about her parents. She
loved and respected her father, but she had
always been a little in awe of him and even a bit
frightened of him at times. But if Papa had been
a little too overbearing and strict, then Mama
had made up for his lack of warmth, and there
had always been Janet to pet and spoil her. In the
sleepy Dorset village, close to the sea, there had
been the village children for her to play with, and
if she climbed trees and tore her clothes, Mama
would darn them before Papa saw the damage
and could seize the chance to complain about the
cost of replacing ruined garments. There had
been egg rolling competitions at Easter, dancing
around the maypole at the May Day celebrations,
swimming in the river during the long hot
days of summer and bonfires in November;
followed by Christmas, with carols sung in
church and presents under the tree.

Eloise came back to reality with a start as Joss
knocked a glass of water over and it trickled off
the table onto Mrs King's best red Turkey carpet.
Eloise mopped it up hastily and then took the
children back to their room to make them ready
for a trip to the vicarage in King's Square. She
had given it a lot of thought during her wakeful
hours before finally falling asleep from sheer
exhaustion. The obvious person to go to for help
was a man of the cloth like her father, and who
better than the person who had taken over his
parish? She hoped the new vicar might be able to
help her to find work, or at the very least to
advise her on the best way to start looking for a
position where she would be allowed to keep her
children with her.

The Reverend Martin Collins steepled his fingers
and stared solemnly at Eloise over the tips of
them as if he were about to pray for her eternal
soul. 'My dear Mrs Cribb, it is quite unthinkable
for a young woman such as you to enter the
workplace. You are a mother and your first consideration
must be your children.'

Eloise clenched her hands in her lap. She had
already explained the circumstances to this man,
but he seemed not to have understood a word
she had said. 'I do not want to leave my children,
vicar. I want to find a position where I can take
them with me.'

He raised a delicate eyebrow. 'My dear young
lady, I'm afraid that is highly unlikely. I mean,
you could apply for a position as governess to a
private family, but they would hardly be willing
to take two such small children on as well. You
cannot teach in a school for the same reason.'

'Sir, I came here for advice. You are telling me
what I already know, but I have to find work as I
have very little money, and, as you are aware,
my father and mother have gone to Africa and
are not expected to return for at least two years. I
need to earn my own living, and I am at a loss as
to what to do.'

'I am sorry to hear it, Mrs Cribb. I can only
suggest that you swallow your pride and return
to your late husband's family in Yorkshire. I am
sure that the rift between you could be mended
by an appropriate apology, and it must needs
come from you. Pride is a sin, you know. Take
my advice, my dear, and travel back to Yorkshire
forthwith. Make your apologies and wait for
your parents to return from their good works in
Africa. I think you know that that is the right and
proper course to take.'

Eloise rose to her feet and found she was
trembling with suppressed anger, but she was
determined not to let it show. 'Thank you for
seeing me, vicar. I am sorry to have taken up
your valuable time.'

Mr Collins looked up at her, and a flicker of
what might have been sympathy softened his
expression. 'If you do not intend to leave London
immediately and would like to leave your
address with me, I will contact you should I hear
of anything which might suit.' He handed her
pen and paper.

When she was outside the vicarage, Eloise
stamped her foot. 'Stupid, pompous idiot of a
man,' she cried angrily. Then, seeing that Joss
was looking scared and bewildered, she bent
down to kiss him on the tip of his nose. 'Mama is
not cross with you, poppet. I'm angry with that
silly man who told us to return to Yorkshire.
Well, I won't do it. I'll take in washing or sewing.
I'll make matchboxes or sell bootlaces on the
street. I won't go back to Cribb's Hall and that's
final.'

Back at the lodging house in Nile Street, Eloise
was let in by an excited Annie. 'There's a gent to
see you, missis. I never seen him afore, but he's a
big giant of a chap who speaks funny. I put him
in Mrs King's parlour, seeing as how she's gone
to the dressmaker's to be fitted for another new
gown. If the old mare gets any fatter she'll have
to have her frocks put together by a sailmaker.'
Annie scuttled off along the passageway,
chortling at her own wit.

Mystified, Eloise followed her. Isaac was the
only person in London who knew where she
was staying and Annie said it was a stranger
who had called. There must be some mistake, or
else the poor child was a little touched in the
head.

'He's in there,' Annie said, pushing a door
open. 'Don't let him keep you for long. She'll be
back in an hour or so, and she don't approve of
gentlemen callers.' With a saucy wink, Annie
strolled off in the direction of the back stairs
leading down to the basement kitchen.

Holding Joss firmly by the hand and with Beth
balanced on her hip, Eloise peeped round the
door of Queenie's private parlour. Standing in
the middle of the room, Reggie looked out of
place amongst the array of china ornaments and
heavy crimson-velvet drapes. His face was
flushed and he looked uncomfortable in his
Sunday best suit, which was made of heavy
tweed, more suited to the colder northern climes
than to the heat of London in May.

Smiling with genuine pleasure, Eloise entered
the room. 'Reggie. What a lovely surprise. What
are you doing here?'

His craggy features relaxed into a shy grin.
'Ellie! I've had a right hard time trying to find
you, lass.'

Joss broke free from his mother's hand and ran
to Reggie, holding up his chubby arms and
chuckling with delight.

Eloise set Beth down on the floor. 'I don't
understand, Reggie. How did you find us and
why are you here in London?'

He bent down to pick up Joss and chucked him
under the chin. 'I've missed you, lad. We've all
missed you back on the farm.' He sat down on
the nearest chair, scooping Beth up and settling
her on his knee beside Joss. 'This is grand,' he
said happily. 'Just like old times.'

'It's good to see you again, Reggie,' Eloise said,
taking a seat opposite him, 'but you haven't told
me why you've come, or how you found us.'

'Well, lass, you gave Mother the address in
Myrtle Street and I went there first, thinking I'd
find you, but the woman were a right old bitch
and she slammed the door in me face. So I went
next door and received much the same treatment.
I have to say I don't think much of the way
southerners behave, but then just as I were
leaving, this big fellow comes out of the house
and asks what my business is with you. We went
to the pub for a pint of ale and a chat, and when
he knew why I wanted to see you, he directed me
here. And here I am.' After this extraordinarily
long speech for him, Reggie paused for breath
and sat grinning at Eloise as if he had accomplished
something quite splendid.

'But you still haven't said why you've come.'
Eloise tried not to sound impatient, but she was
beginning to think the worst. Perhaps Gladys
had been taken ill, or Meg. Perhaps the farm had
been razed to the ground by fire? 'For goodness'
sake, Reggie. I only left you yesterday. What
could have happened in such a short space of
time?'

His smile faded and he set the wriggling
children down on the ground. 'Your in-laws
turned up at the farm soon after you'd left on the
train for London. The old fellow seems a decent
enough chap, but his wife and her sister are
another matter. My old lady didn't take to them
at all. You should have heard her going on at that
Miss Braithwaite for not coming to her own
daughter's funeral. I almost felt sorry for the old
witch.'

'But what did they want, Reggie? Why did
they choose that time to come?'

'Happen they didn't know where you were
until they got the telegraph about the funeral. It
seems they weren't interested in poor Ada, but
your mother-in-law has set her heart on having
young Joss to bring up as she sees fit. Ma told her
it were a bad idea and she couldn't think of
taking him away from his mother, but Mrs Cribb
wouldn't listen to her. She said as how he were
their Ronald's son and he must be brought up as
such and be educated like a gentleman, since one
day he would take over the business. She made
no mention of Beth, but I'm of the opinion she
won't rest until she gets her hands on young Joss,
or Ronnie as she kept on calling him.'

Eloise stared at him in horror. 'No! No, she has
no rights over him. Joss is my son. You didn't tell
them where we'd gone, did you?'

'I never, but Meg let it slip you'd gone to
London and they know you lived in Myrtle
Street. The old woman screamed at Cribb and
told him he must travel south to find you. That's
why I come down on the night train. I knew I
must seek you out and warn you what were
afoot.'

'But they would never find me here.'

'I did,' Reggie said simply.

Eloise jumped to her feet. 'I must find somewhere
else to stay. We must leave here today.'

'Or you could come back with me, lass.' Reggie
stood up, carefully avoiding treading on the
children who were clamouring to be picked up
again. 'Marry me, Ellie. I know you don't love
me, but I love you enough for us both. If you're
my wife then I can protect you and the little ones
from the likes of the Cribbs. You'd be safe on the
farm with us. What do you say, lass?'