A Road to Let Go (Fallen Tuesday #4) (7 page)

“
You
’
re too smart to do nothing in
life,
”
Mel said and
laughed.

“
I
do plenty,
”
Alex said.
“
I just don
’
t base it around money and a
career. My career is my life. So take that, girlfriend.
”

“
Okay,
girlfriend
,
”
Mel
said.
“
I need to close my
eyes for a little bit before work.
”

“
Work,
”
Alex said.

“
I
have to earn money, Alex. I have to find out
…
whatever.
”

“
Chasing
your tail,
”
Alex teased.

“
Have
a good night,
”
Mel said.

She ended the call and rolled over.
She pulled the covers over her head.

Chasing your tail.

Mel squeezed her eyes shut and knew
it was the truth. The sad truth. But, whatever, it was her life. It wasn
’
t like she had anyone else to
share it with.

(6)

Mack asked the question that
finally broke the ice, but only a little.

“
How
the hell did this happen?
”
he asked.

Everyone but Mack and Jake laughed.

“
You
need an explanation?
”
Gray
asked.

“
You
know what I mean,
”
Mack
said with a scowl.

“
It
’
s simple,
”
Jake said.
“
I
messed up big time.
”

“
Well,
don
’
t be too hard on
yourself, man,
”
Trent said.
“
It is what it is.
”

“
That
’
s why you walked away?
”
Luke asked.

Jake nodded.
“
Seeing that woman with the baby
and then the pregnant woman
…
it just got to me, you know? It made me think of what
’
s going to happen to Chloe. With Chloe. The fact
that I
’
m going to be a
father. It just
…
it just
got to me.
”

Jake finished his beer and put the
bottle on the counter. He looked at the band, desperate for someone to say
something.

“
And
you
’
re the one who helps
him?
”
Gray asked Trent with
a confused look on his face.

“
We
share common interests here,
”
Trent said.
“
You guys don
’
t get what it
’
s like to be with Chloe.
”

“
I
’
m thankful for that one,
”
Mack said.
“
No offense.
”

“
Oh,
sure, none taken,
”
Jake
said.
“
Christ, Mack.
”

“
What?
”
Mack asked.
“
I
’
m
not going to lie to you, man. She
’
s
a bad chick. You both
”
- he
pointed to Jake and Trent -
“
know
that. You knew that then and you knew that now. Trent did the right thing and
you, Jake, well, you did the wrong thing.
”

“
I
just wanted to show off,
”
Jake said.
“
Make her see
what she had lost.
”

“
And
now look what she gained, man,
”
Luke said.
“
Shit.
”

“
Hey,
I could use a little support here,
”
Jake said.

“
How?
”
Gray asked.
“
I mean, come on, what do we do?
You
’
re our brother. That
baby will be a little Fallen Tuesday rockstar. We know that. As far as Chloe
goes
…
we have to deal. Just
like you.
”

“
Just
like me,
”
Jake said.
“
I feel like an ass.
”

“
Here
’
s the question,
”
Luke said. He put his hands
out.
“
Do not worry about
our opinions, okay? Look into your heart. Do you love her? Do you love Chloe?
”

Jake took a second to think about
it. His mind screamed
NO,
but his heart wasn
’
t sure. He kept going back in time. To the first
time he saw her. To the first time he kissed her. To what happened after that
first kiss. Damn, to what happened in the backseat of Jake
’
s car that first night. Chloe
was crazy from day one. And when Trent showed up and things got tense, it only
made it harder for Jake to walk away from her. He didn
’
t want to imagine Chloe -
his Chloe
- with
anyone else.

“
I
don
’
t
…
no,
”
Jake finally said.
“
No.
I don
’
t love her. I love
the idea of her. I love the fantasy of her. I love what happened years ago. But
to be with her forever? That
’
s
a life sentence.
”

“
You
’
re serving it,
”
Mack said.

“
Let
me ask you this,
”
Gray
said.
“
How far along is
she?
”

“
Pregnancy?
I don
’
t know. Not that long
at all, man. Are you questioning if it
’
s
mine?
”

Gray shrugged his shoulders.
“
I
’
m
not trying to be a dick here.
”

“
It
’
s fine,
”
Jake said.
“
I
’
m not
…”

“
How
do you know then?
”
Mack
blurted out. He opened the fridge and got a fresh beer for himself and Jake. He
twisted the cap off and slid the bottle to Jake.
“
Stop
this bullshit for a second. Step away from the past, man. Step away from the
situation. Look at it. How do you know she
’
s
pregnant?
”

“
Shit,
Mack,
”
Trent said.

“
What
do you mean?
”
Jake asked.

“
You
know exactly what I mean. Is she showing?
”

“
No.
It
’
s too early.
”

Mack raised an eyebrow.
“
So
…
how do you know
?
”

Jake froze. His blood ran cold and
he looked down at his beer bottle.

How do you know?

Jake
’
s
lips quivered for a few seconds.
“
Because
she told me.
”

“
What
’
s her track record like?
”
Mack asked.

“
Okay,
”
Trent said.
“
I don
’
t think we need to do this
…”

“
Maybe
we do,
”
Luke said.

Jake looked at Trent who looked
pale. He and Trent had gone through a mess like this already once before. The
baby that Chloe lost had been one of theirs. Either Jake
’
s or Trent
’
s.
And it was something nobody would ever know.

“
You
think she
’
d lie?
”
Jake asked, staring right at
Trent.

The silence that followed was an
obvious answer for Jake.

“
Just
take a second here,
”
Gray
said.
“
Think all this out.
”

“
Chloe
’
s done some bad shit in her
life,
”
Trent said.
“
But this
…
?
”

“
When
did she tell you she was pregnant?
”
Luke asked.

Jake felt a pain in his heart.
“
When I tried to tell her to go
away.
”

“
Damn,
”
Mack yelled as he slammed his
beer bottle down. It foamed up and spilled over the top.

“
When
did that happen?
”
Gray
asked.

“
Right
after she talked to me I bet,
”
Trent said.

“
What?
”
Mack asked.

“
One
night after practice,
”
Trent said.
“
She was
outside waiting. She started her normal routine. Telling me how good-looking I
had become. How she wanted to be with me. All that nonsense.
”

“
That
’
s why she was crying,
”
Jake whispered.
“
Good hell. I
’
m an idiot. I
’
m a complete ass.
”

“
I
think you are,
”
Mack said.
“
But I still you love you, bro.
”

Jake grew angry. He had his fresh
beer in one hand. His other hand was in a fist and was shaking. He wanted to
hit someone. Instead, he grabbed the empty beer bottle and threw it across the
room. It hit a wall and shattered.

“
How
’
d that feel?
”
Luke asked.

“
Pretty
damn good,
”
Jake said.

Mack slid Jake one of his empties.
Jake threw that one too. Then, one by one, the guys finished their beers and
offered the bottles to Jake. He threw all of them. Each time one shattered he
felt a slight relief, not much, but it was better than letting the anger pent
up. The last time he had pent up anger, he took Chloe to bed, unprotected, and
look how that turned out.

Shit.

“
Need
another bottle?
”
Mack asked
and lifted his half full beer.
“
I
’
ll chug it. For the good of the
band.
”

Luke smiled.

Jake shook his head.
“
I
’
m
good for the moment.
”
He
paused.
“
You think she
’
s full of shit?
”

“
Could
be,
”
Gray said.

“
I
’
d hate to agree with it,
”
Trent said.
“
What proof do you have?
”

“
Proof?
”
Jake asked.

“
A
test?
”
Luke asked.
“
She
’
s not showing, right? So what proof do you have?
”

“
Her
word,
”
Trent whispered.

“
Yeah,
”
Jake said.
“
Her word. She told me and I just
went with it. I don
’
t know,
guys. We had that awesome show and then it all came crashing down for me. Forty
thousand people screaming for me, for us. Then it became one person who needs
me. That scares me more than the forty thousand people.
”

“
Of
course it does,
”
Mack said.
“
It
’
s Chloe.
”

They all laughed.

“
I
need another beer,
”
Jake
said.

Mack hooked him up and Jake drank.

“
You
don
’
t have to be with her,
”
Gray said.
“
I mean, it
’
s not the best circumstances in
the world, but you shouldn
’
t
force yourself to be with her if you don
’
t
love her.
”

“
But
what
’
s my responsibility
here?
”
Jake asked.
“
I
’
ll
be honest, man. Part of me wants to just walk. Let her figure it all out on her
own. But that makes me sound and feel like a scumbag. That baby did nothing
wrong.
”

“
You
’
re a halfway decent person after
all,
”
Trent said and nudged
Jake.

“
I
think first you need her to prove that she
’
s
knocked up,
”
Mack said.

“
Well,
when you put it like that
…”
Jake shook his head.

“
I
’
m serious.
”

“
How
do I do that?
”
Jake asked.

“
Get
a test and make her take it. Right on the spot.
”

“
That
’
s a bold move,
”
Luke said.

“
But
Chloe is a bold woman,
”
Trent said.
“
I agree. It
should be done.
”

“
Make
her earn your trust,
”
Mack
said.
“
What gives her the
right to just show up and dictate things?
”

“
Three
reasons,
”
Gray said.

Jake looked at Gray and saw Gray
point to his chest and then down between his legs. It pissed Jake off. Not because
Gray was being honest but because the honesty hurt. That
’
s exactly what it came down to. Chloe used her
body, as always, to get what she wanted.

“
Then
I guess I have my night planned,
”
Jake said.
“
Get a pregnancy
test and force Chloe to take it.
”

“
Sounds
like a plan,
”
Mack said.

“
Like
hell it is,
”
Jake said.

“
Come
on,
”
Trent said.
“
Let
’
s take a minute and breathe.
”