A Toiling Darkness (17 page)

He didn’t say anything for a moment, his
hands clenching his armrest, knuckles turning white.

“The Consort are here to keep an eye on
things,” he said in a tight voice.

The bogeyman for all beings. Here
tonight.

You ever get that feeling where everything
fades out on you. Your senses go numb as you focus on what was
causing you to go into shock. That was happening to me right
now.

I was reintroduced to truly feeling fear. My
heart pounded a little harder and the hairs on my body stood up.
Sweat beaded against my skin and my mouth all of a sudden decided
it needed a drink of water. I sat up straighter and scanned the
ground, looking at each being and trying to remember who I knew,
what they were capable of and trying to spot anyone who could be a
Consort member.

Meeting the Consort didn’t mean I knew them.
When they did show themselves, they kept themselves hidden with
cloaks and masks. Being near them when they are like that is like
being in a vacuum. Magic is nearly impossible to use, your
weaknesses are exploited and you can’t do much but wait for their
verdict. Like I’ve said before, there are only two beings I’m
afraid of, the Consort being at the top of the list. The first time
I met them, they punished me for crimes I didn’t do, cursing me
with the pesky little brand on the inside of my left thigh.

It was a bad start to my relationship with
them.

Trying to spot them when they didn’t want to
be seen was impossible. Everyone in the crowd didn’t seem powerful
enough, important enough, or suspicious enough. If the Consort were
in the crowd, I couldn’t see them and by Kay’s reaction, neither
could he. Sometimes I really did wish the enemy walked around with
a billboard attached to make them easier to spot.

I mentally swore a string of curses. I
should have left the city until this was all over. Could’ve,
should’ve and obviously didn’t.

“How do you know?” I asked, still scanning
for them. “Does everyone know?”

“No…not many know and I only know because
they gave me a little visit. Someone in the city has been
naughty.”

“How long are they going to be around?”

“Who knows?” He sighed and rubbed at his
face. “They are only gathering information right now.”

It explained why his skin was extra silvery.
Lord Kay was upping his magic juice, preparing for the worse.

I swore out loud this time, using the vast
repertoire of words I learned over the years.

“Yeah, my thoughts exactly,” he said.

We sat in a companionable silence, both our
thoughts on the same thing. When was the Consort leaving? Who
attracted their attention? I couldn’t help but feel I was on their
minds. Years of guilt built up into this little hard ball in my
mind and it kept telling me that whatever the Consort did to me, I
deserved. It agreed with the little curse they put on me, it would
support anything they decided.

Eventually the showcase ended when we didn’t
notice. I blinked a couple times, surprised that time went by
quickly and the arena was already emptying.

Yeah, the Consort had that kind of affect on
even us false immortals. We may not be able to die but the Consort
had the power to make our eternity a hell.

We moved to Kay’s main office. It was a
large office filled with old leather-bound books on magic,
yellowing papers in mounds everywhere, and photos decorating the
wall strategically to show Kay’s expansive history. The room was
cold, a weird contrast to his body heat. The waves of hot nervous
magic calmed down a little after the showcase ended and he was
almost back to his self-absorbed self again. Probably happy that
the clients were gone, meaning the Consort were too. For now at
least. The fighters stayed behind, going to their quarters
underground to rest or talk or compare muscle size.

Kay leaned back in his office chair,
swiveling a little with his hands clasped over his stomach and his
eyes closed. They have been closed for the past five minutes. I’m
fine with the silence. I kept myself busy, still thinking about the
Consort. I added that on to the list of my problems, but kept it
below finding out who was Kalen’s master. Right now, nothing could
top out the importance of that one. If I can kill the master then I
can get Kalen off my back.

Neither of us said anything, neither of us
wanted to.

Probably about another five minutes passed
before his eyes snapped open and he looked at me. I narrowed my
own, not missing the gleam in them as he thought mischievous
thoughts. The roguish smile on his face told me I wasn’t going to
like what he was about to say.

“Show me your true human form.”

Yeah. I didn’t like it at all. So much that
shocked laughter escaped my lips.

“Why?” I asked, taken aback by the
demand.

“It’s been so long since I’ve last seen it.
I miss your beauty.”

“Only you would think that. Not many like it
very much.”

He tilted his head, staring at me closely. I
tried not to shift in my seat A long time has passed since I was in
that form. A whole lot of mess came with it too.

Was this considered me avoiding my issues?
Naw.

“That’s only because they don’t know any
better,” he replied, looking solemn. Those words were starting to
become some kind of annoying mantra others kept saying to me.
Only because they don’t know any better.
They were full of
contradictions to me. What have I done except try to make it so
they did know better?

I was nice once, full of positive emotions.
I cared, I cried, laughed and smiled. But they took it away from
me. They chipped away at my personality until all that was left was
anger and apathy. I didn’t smile, I smirked. I didn’t cry, I lashed
out. My laughing became manic. I became mean. Because humans didn’t
know any better and they took more than I could give.

I growled. “You don’t know what you’re
asking me to do. I haven’t been in that form for nearly two hundred
years.”

“Since after Eithna, right?” His expression
softened.

Kay was actually the one to help me create
this little child form. It only involved two months of pain as my
body shrunk and reshaped itself and then another couple of months
getting used to being weaker. Becoming a child weakened me
considerably—more than halved my powers. But it helped me fall off
the grid. It constructed a door between me and my abyss of powers,
though lately that door has been weakening.

There was a reason Kalen couldn’t recognize
me as the one he was searching for, well, other than the fact that
he wouldn’t listen to his soul. My power felt different, not
so…dark. As a child, I played with shadows, as my true human form,
I played with night itself.

“If I show you, will you tell me what I want
to know?” I asked, getting used to the idea of being myself
again.

I miss who I really am, even if I refuse to
admit it most of the time. I missed being able to communicate with
those who hid in the darkness, I missed the true control I had, and
I especially missed the feeling of being complete. Maybe that was
why I considered Kay’s request so easily. I smiled, remembering the
conversations I had with El after we separated. All he had to do
was focus on me and then talk into the night, and I could hear it.
I haven’t heard his voice in so long.

Was I going to regret this decision? I hoped
not.

He nodded, a glint of excitement growing in
his eyes.

“It’s your funeral. Just remember I won’t
have complete control. It’s been too long. And don’t forget the
slauve. He will sense me.”

“I have wards up, you should be safe.”

“You say that until he swings in here like
Tarzan and smites both our asses,” I said wryly.

“I feel like you just mixed up
references.”

I shrugged. “Who knows? It’s hard to keep
track of them all sometimes.”

With that said, I closed my eyes and sighed,
trying to relax. Losing the childish form was a lot easier than it
was to make it. I simply went back to who I was. I felt myself
reconnect with powers I haven’t had access to. The door kind of
crumbled away. I reached out to the deep dark pit of my powers and
it responded, filling me up, making me whole again. In moments, I
grew into my true human form.

I flinched, an old conversation with Eithna
coming to mind.

Sometimes I wonder about you. You have all
this power and yet you don’t do anything with it. You would
probably just waste away in some hole if you weren’t mentoring
me.

I could care less. I just want to be left
alone for once.

The things I would do with your power.

Then take it. I don’t want it.

With my real form came even more power. The
lights dimmed slowly until they went completely out, all the lights
sniffed out of the energy saving light bulbs. They were no longer
going to last the hundred years you were guaranteed to have. My
powers washed over me, filled up the missing void inside of me. My
body tingled, feeling a little high off of the rush.

This was who I was, who I was meant to be
and who I always deny myself to be. Even now I worked at keeping
myself under control, clamping down on my urges. El taught me
enough. I took a couple of deep breaths, willing my power to listen
to me, its master. It finally listened, but barely. It was
neglected for so long and I presented it a chance to be released. I
had to fight with it and force it to my will.

No, we aren’t going to kill Kay this time
either.

No, leave those creatures alone. We don’t
need chaos right now.

This city is off limits, come back to
me.

It took a moment and I just stood there,
watching everything as if it was the light of day as Kay lit
candles. I blinked a couple times, readjusting to the little bit of
light and Kay was now standing only a couple of feet from me. I
watched with some satisfaction as a shudder crawled down his body.
He didn’t balk in fear like a lesser being. This was how I knew who
was stronger or on par with me. He stood his ground and smiled,
glad to see me as me.

I guess I can admit it was nice to feel like
myself for once. I smiled back, not caring that I was stark naked.
My clothes didn’t make it through the transformation. A pity too,
it was such a nice simple dress. I pulled at the shadows around me
and fashioned what looked like a black outfit. It consisted of a
low cut shirt showing off the mounds of my breasts and my midriff.
The pants were formed to fit right against my skin, making it seem
like leather but a hundred times more comfortable. Others would see
it as such, not knowing that I was actually naked. I mentally
shrugged—I was always a modest person. Not that Kay could make me
blush. He never looked at me like something he wanted to fuck. The
look was always closer to possession. I was something he wanted to
possess and bend to his will.

“Beautiful, absolutely beautiful,” he
breathed out, sounding breathless. He slowly reached out and
touched the black locks of my hair. I no longer looked up at him,
we were actually about the same height. It gave me a new
perspective on his facial features. As a child, his eyes looked to
be a brownish-grey type of hazel with very little green. As an
adult, his eyes had more green in them, very blue and green at the
same time. They were captivating, a woman could get lost in them if
she wasn’t careful. I know I almost did so long ago. The magical
currents moved through his eyes, bringing out a tinge of
yellow.

I made out the reflection of my own eyes in
his iris. Completely black, no whites at all.

I stepped back and out of his reach. “Talk.”
I cringed at the powerful sound of my voice. It was a smooth sonata
brimming with layered power I didn’t even want and yet missed. It
was a siren’s voice, luring my victims into false security while
promising their deaths.

He shivered again and settled back down in
his chair, getting comfortable. I stayed where I stood and waited
for him to tell me what I wanted to know.

“After you left yesterday, I poked around a
little,” he said. “I couldn’t find anything. The slauve is nothing
but rumors in the wind right now.”

“Your little seer says you know the
master—someone hell bent on revenge against me because I may have
killed someone important to him. The Seeker told me the same thing.
This master is part of your crew.”

“I know a lot of powerful beings and right
now this city is packed full with them. I work with all of them in
one capacity or another.”

“You should have an idea on who,” I said,
exasperated. Kay knew, he just didn’t know he knew.

“Akhlys—”

“Darkness.” I clenched my teeth.

All the rage that used to be so easy as a
child to hold back surged forward and surprised me with its
outburst. The already useless light bulbs in the room popped,
sending shards all over and the candles dimmed, barely staying lit.
My powers were throwing a damn tantrum. I needed to quickly get a
clamp on this rage before it almost destroyed me again. I took a
deep breath and the candles brightened up a bit once again.

Yes, I can do this. I can control this form,
I mentally cheered.

Kay fell silent for a moment and cleared his
throat. “Darkness. I wish I knew who wants you dead and I do want
to help find him, but forgive me because right now my mind and
attentions are elsewhere.”

“Oh, no of course I understand. You’re
priorities are always you first,” I replied with frost in my voice.
Where Kay was full of hot magic, I was full of cold power and some
of it was leaking out. I was trying to keep calm but I was two
hundred years out of practice. The power in me kept shifting around
and stretching out, pushing against my skin. I wanted to
self-combust just to end the intrusive movement.