A Twist of Betrayal (14 page)

Dan didn’t deserve this man’s trust or devotion. Or understanding. And yet, he’d always had it.

Chapter 14

Almost Five Years Ago

The familiar welcoming scent of apples now mixed with pine. A week before, the entire family, Dan included, had gone to find the perfect live Christmas tree.

“I feel like I’m intruding,” Dan had said when Justine told him he’d be coming along.

“It’s tradition,” Roger had explained. “All the Albrights go together as a family and get the tree. Then decorate it. Marriage and grandchildren don’t change the tradition except to add to the number of people going along.”

“But Justine and I aren’t married yet,” Dan said.

“Being engaged is enough to make you family,” Roger said.

Now it was Christmas Eve, and Dan showed up unexpectedly.

Avery opened the door to him. “Hey, you’re a day early,” he joked. “Christmas dinner isn’t until tomorrow at noon.” He stepped out of the way and let Dan in. “Don’t tell me, you came by to give Justine her present early. Want some eggnog?”

Avery was very happy.

“Sounds like you’ve already had some.”

“Just a little, and it’s delicious,” Avery replied.

And Dan wondered what was in the eggnog. He forced a smile, thinking yes, he had a present, all right, but Justine wasn’t going to like this one. From the foyer, he was hit with the unmistakable sense of Christmas and family and home. It was a closeness that few people ever experience. He knew he couldn’t remember the last time he experienced it.

He wondered if he’d get a piece of pie. Before Justine kicked him out the front door.

“Is Justine around?” Dan asked, unzipping his coat so the warmth of home could penetrate the cold left in him from the drive here. He knew she was there, spending the few days before Christmas at the home where she grew up, helping her mother with last minute details before the big holiday bash.

“No, she’s not a round,” Avery quipped. “She’s not a square, either. She’s kind of curvy, but I bet you already knew that.”

Dan grinned. “Yeah, I noticed.”

Justine and her mother came from the direction of the kitchen then. “Hi, what’s up?” Justine greeted him, her words rather hesitant as if she already knew what he was there to tell her. It still amazed him how she could read him as easily as she did. He was caught up in the beautiful way she seemed to glow even though she wore an apron and had flour in her hair. From the living room came the sounds of laughter. The rest of the family, or some of them, were watching something on television.

“Avery,” Abby said, “come help me get these pies into the oven. And stay out of my eggnog.”

A moment later, they were alone. Well, not quite alone, the presence of family filled the air around them.

“What is it?”

That was just like her, straight to the point.

“Don’t I get a kiss?” he asked.

She gave him a quick kiss, and pulled away before he could get much of a grip on her.

“So tell me. Something’s up. It’s written all over your face. And this isn’t like you to come by without calling first. Besides, you’ve still got your uniform on,” she insisted.

“It’s about tomorrow,” he began.

Her eyes narrowed, and Dan thought she’d already guessed what was coming. “What about tomorrow?”

“I have to work.”

For a long moment, she stared at him. “But you took vacation time to make sure you’d be off for Christmas.”

“Yes, well it got canceled because McGill is sick, and the chief needs me there.”

“McGill isn’t sick.” She was instantly riled, and her voice echoed off the walls of the foyer.

Dan shrugged slightly. “I can’t be the judge of that. All I know is that the chief caught me before the end of my shift today and said he needs me to do a seven A to seven P tomorrow.”

“Didn’t you tell him you had plans?”

“Yes, but it did little good.”

“It’s Christmas,” she said.

Her eyes sparkled with anger, and Dan stared at her. It was as if the heat of her anger set off his desire. She argued better than anyone he’d ever known, but he didn’t really see her angry too often. There was something about the sparkle that came to her eyes that made him want to grab her and press her entire length up against him with the wall behind her. And kiss her.

Her father was in the next room, so he didn’t dare touch her. He didn’t move.

“The town still needs to be patrolled. Crime doesn’t take off for the holidays,” he reminded her. “In fact, the holiday can make it worse, with too much togetherness and more travelers on the highways, all mixed together with something probably more potent than your mom’s eggnog.”

“I don’t care,” she snapped.

He really wanted to kiss her. He had to lick his suddenly dry lips.

“We have it all planned,” she went on. “My mother has a thirty-pound turkey, for crying out loud.”

“I can’t help it. You’ll just have to save me some.”

“It won’t be the same. We should be together on Christmas.”

“It’s my job, I can’t walk away from it.”

“Not even for one day? For Christmas!”

“No,” he said evenly.

She opened her mouth, but then closed it again before she let any words tumble out, and Dan knew exactly what she worked to keep unsaid. She hated his job and the hours that went with it. She hated the fact he was a cop, putting his life in danger, putting that danger before everything else. The only time she’d ever voiced it was that day he’d saved her life. It had never been stated in so many words again, but that didn’t change her feelings. Cops had bad hours. This wasn’t the first time he had to let something go by because he had to work or he couldn’t end his shift because he was caught in something.

But he could never walk away. Being a cop was who he was. She had no idea what it had taken for him to get where he was. He could no sooner quit as he could quit breathing. He knew he didn’t want to be anything else, except Justine Albright’s husband. He waited, anticipated, but hoping that she didn’t ask him to choose between the two. Because he knew deep in his heart, that if he chose one, he would hate it. And if he chose the other, she would hate it.

She stared at him, and he knew she was going to ask him to choose. He could see the argument building within her eyes. He could almost see the question coming like the light at the end of the tunnel that would turn out to be a train about to run him down.

It was Roger, standing in the doorway with a grandchild in his arms, who stopped the argument before it had the chance to begin.

“Well,” he said, his voice even and deep, “it looks as if we’ll just be celebrating Christmas the day after tomorrow instead of tomorrow.”

“Dad—” Justine started.

He held up a hand to stop her. “Why not? The day after tomorrow is Sunday. No one has to work. Your brothers will just get to stay longer. If the kids get too antsy, we’ll let them open a few presents.”

“But the food?” Justine asked.

“Can be reheated for Sunday, right Ab?” he asked Abby, who was in the kitchen, but apparently heard the entire conversation

“Of course,” she assured them. “And since the turkey hasn’t been cooked yet, I’ll just keep in the refrigerator and hold it off another day.”

Roger looked at his daughter. The child in his arms, Justine’s niece, reached up and touched his nose. The touch didn’t take Roger’s attention from Justine. “Dan’s a police officer,” he said.

“I know that,” she said.

“Then work with the idea and not against it,” he advised gently. “And let us not forget just whose birthday it is we celebrate. I doubt if He will care when we celebrate it.” Then, he turned and walked back into the living room.

They stood still for a moment. Then Justine hesitantly moved into his embrace. Dan held her to him. Her spark of anger was gone, but his want remained. There was nothing that compared to the feeling of completeness Dan got when he held her, especially at the end of his shift. She was like a piece of him that he missed when they were apart. He knew she gave everything she had to everything she did. He’d seen it in the legal cases she represented, and he knew it would be the same for their marriage. He wanted to give himself to her completely, too, but he didn’t know if that was ever going to be possible.

There were things in his past he couldn’t share with her, parts of him he could never let her see, things that made him choose becoming an officer of the law. Then when his partner died in his arms, he knew he could never be anything else. At the same time he couldn’t let it tear his soul to shreds again. He’d let himself get close to his partners because that was how partners worked. But the first one had nearly ruined his life. Then a second one had torn out his heart. And he’d learned first-hand that no matter how good a cop he was, he couldn’t stop bad things from happening.

He could, however, stop them from affecting his soul.

So now, in the foyer, with Christmas and family so close, he held Justine to him. He could love her. He could make love to her. He could hold her. He could be there for her. He could share his life with her.

He hoped it would be enough for the two of them and their life together.

Chapter 15

Dan shoved the warm memory of Christmas aside as Abby’s voice brought him back to the present. He fought down a shiver.

“Dan, did you hear me?” She stood before him with the coffee pot in her hand.

“What?” he stammered.

“I asked if you wanted fresh coffee,” she repeated.

“Oh, sure, thanks.”

She refilled his cup, not that there was much gone out of it.

Roger came back into the room. Dan had been so lost in the past, he hadn’t realized Roger had even left. “Mark will be here as soon as he can,” he informed them. “Jeff’s on his way, too.”

“What about Avery?” Dan asked.

“Jeff is going to drop the family off here then drive down and get him. We all know how undependable Avery’s car is. He’d go crazy if he thought something happened to Justine and he broke down on the side of the highway and couldn’t get here. Hopefully, we’ll have her back before Jeff even gets him here.” He took Abby’s free hand and squeezed it tightly. The love that passed between them was like a bright neon sign that lit up the room.

It tore at Dan’s heart.

He was amazed by their calmness, while he, himself, felt so inadequate. It was their love that gave them strength. It was the simple way they stood together and held hands.

He worked to blink away the tears that suddenly filled his eyes.

He couldn’t stay any longer. He couldn’t wait around for something to happen. He couldn’t live surrounded by such strong love and not have Justine to share it with. It hurt too much. All this time, he thought he’d been holding a part of himself back from her, but somehow she’d managed to slip inside his soul anyway. She managed to become the person he needed more than anyone else. And he needed her now. Hell, her entire family had somehow wiggled in and made themselves comfortable in his soul. It was what he really longed for. Family. He wanted a family with Justine. Hell, he would even take the baby.

He suddenly felt as helpless as he had when Adam had died in his arms, or when Deke had left him holding that bag.

He feared the chances of finding his wife grew slimmer and slimmer with each passing moment, and Dan couldn’t sit around any longer. He couldn’t give Deke anymore time with Justine. He couldn’t wait for Deke to call. He had to go out and find her, had to do
something
, even if it did get him suspended. It was a chance he had to take. He was about to get up and excuse himself, lie to her parents and tell them he had to get back to station when his cell phone rang.

It startled them all, and coffee splashed out of Dan’s cup and burned him through the jeans he wore.

He swore his heart dropped to his stomach when he saw Steve’s number in the ID display.

He’d told Steve to call if
anything at all
happened. He could only hope the anything at all wasn’t bad news.

Dan couldn’t stop the shiver that passed through him as he put it to his ear. “Yeah?” he said.

“Dan?” It was Steve.

Steve’s lack of emotion scared him, but only a little. If he was calling with bad news, Dan was certain he’d hear it in Steve’s voice. “Yeah?” he asked again.

“The FBI is here.”

Dan didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. Deke left no room for outsiders here. The last thing Dan needed was to deal with people who didn’t know Justine, who wouldn’t understand what he was going though. He certainly didn’t want the FBI questioning him or looking into his past.

But anything else, anything other than protocol certainly would raise questions and suspicion. So he played along.

“All right, I’ll be there as soon as I can,” he said. Dan hung up and met the apprehensive looks of his in-laws.

“The FBI is at the station,” he informed them.

“But there’s no news about Justine?” Abby asked.

“No.”

“Is that good or bad?”

Dan held her gaze for a moment, seeing so much of Justine in her. “I don’t know. I have to keep hoping no news is good news,” he answered honestly. “I have to go.”

He moved to the door, and both Abby and Roger followed him.

At the door, Roger stopped him. “Son?”

Dan looked back and met the older man’s gaze. He saw the questions in Roger’s eyes, and Dan wanted to tell the man he was going to get his daughter back safe and sound, but he was terrified it would be a lie. “Yes?”

“Take care of yourself, too. You look as if you could use some rest. You’ll be no good to her when you find her if you don’t. If you need to come back here for anything, don’t hesitate.”

Roger saw things with a clarity most people didn’t, Dan realized. He nodded, acknowledging his father-in-law’s advice. “I’ll keep in touch and let you know if anything comes up.”

It was Roger’s turn to nod. Then Dan was out the door, heading to his truck and wishing suddenly that he’d hugged them both.

He waited until he was in his truck to call Steve back on his cell.

“What’s up?” Steve asked.

“Did the FBI ask specifically for me to come in?” Dan asked.