Act of Betrayal (26 page)

I couldn't bear to admit openly that my perfect marriage had been

nothing but a sham, and that the real love of my husband's life

had been a girl half his age.' She sighed. 'Jason had inherited

Tristans, and he made sure that Miss Marshall received adequate

financial provision. Death was something my husband had never

contemplated and he had neglected to change his will in her

favour. 'Jason informed me he was going to make himsel

responsible for her, and I had no choice but to agree. I knew

what people would think and I welcomed it. Anything, I thought,

but the truth. 'Since my last attack I've had a lot of time to

think— to realise the unhappiness I've caused. While my son and

I were estranged, and you were just a name, it didn't seem to

matter so much that I'd contributed to your divorce. But living

with Jason, seeing his unhappiness at first hand was another

matter.' The upright back became if possible a little straighten

'Even so, if Jason had been able to win you back to him without

my having to give you this explanation, I should have been more

than thankful. It's not pleasant to have to parade one's

selfishness and malice in front of someone you are meeting for

the first time.' There was a long pause, then she added quietly,

T won't ask you to forgive me, Laura, because I quite see that

may not be possible. I only ask you to understand and make

allowance for my failings.' She picked up a small handbell from

the table beside her and rang it imperatively. Only a few seconds

later, Laura heard the door behind her open and someone enter the

room. Instinct told her that it was not Wanda Bishop. Lady

Wingard said crisply, 'Wanda is making tea, but I advise you,

Jason, to take your wife away and give her something stronger.

She looks as if she needs it.' She paused, then said more gently,

'I've put the record straight at long last. I only hope and pray

that haven't left it too late for you both. Now, leave me please.

I need some time to collect myself.' Laura looked up at her

husband. His face was pale, his mouth grimly set. He said

quietly, 'Come with me, Laura. We need to talk.' They went

through some french windows into the garden. The rain had

stopped, and the air was cool and full of the fragrance of grass

and wet earth. He said, 'So now you know all of it.' She said, on

a little shaken breath. 'Yes oh God yes. Jason, why didn't you

tell me? Why did you let me go on thinking all those terrible

things?' 'Because I'd given mother my word,' he said grimly. 'And

because the doctor told me I had to accede to her every whim,

that he couldn't answer for her life if she had any more upsets.

It was an obsession with her this pretence that she and my father

were a devoted couple. At times, I swear she even believed it

herself. And then she began to change, to face up to what had

really happened, and I started to hope.' He added quietly, 'For a

long time I felt pretty bitter myself. It amazed me that you'd

just accepted the fact that I was a liar and a swine without

question.' He looked at her gravely. ' I told you once you'd

never asked me the question that mattered asked if it was true.

What I wanted was for you to believe in me, no matter how black

the evidence might look. But the circumstances, and your uncle's

interference were too strong for me.' He put his hands on her

shoulders, looking down into her eyes. 'What nearly killed me was

the thought that I'd lost you without ever really having

possessed you. There always seemed to be some reticence in you

even in our closest moments. I thought maybe that was why you'd

found it so easy to leave me because in your heart you preferred

being on your own.' She said shakily, 'Finding you was like

finding the

other half of myself. But it worried me that you would ] never

talk about yourself. Now, I can understand why, I but at the time

I felt you only wanted me to share part of your life. I knew

there was something—some secret that you wanted to keep from

me, and I suppose that I was why I believed those horrible

reports from the detective agency. It all suddenly seemed to make

a 1 dreadful kind of sense.' He said softly, 'So many times oh,

darling so many ! times I wanted to tell you everything pour it

all out. But you were so young so untouched by life in many ways

that it seemed unfair to burden you with it. I I wanted you from

that first moment, but told myself I i had to stay aloof. I'd

seen enough of what could happen between two people when love

turned sour. It sickened me, and I was determined I would never

let it happen even if it meant I could never let a woman get dose

to me emotionally.' He put out his hand smoothing her hair back

from her face. "Then after we'd made love I knew I'd fallen into

the trap. I loved you, and I couldn't live without you. That's

why I went away for a while to try and persuade myself that it

was unfair to marry you when I had all these family problems to

contend with.' She looked up at him, her eyes grave and 1

questioning, 'Was that why you would never say you loved me?' 'In

a way,' he said. 'It seemed to me that all I'd been able to

associate with the word "love" were lies and : deceit and

bitterness. I didn't want to use it to describe what I felt for

you. But I did love you, Laura, and I've never stopped loving

you, even when we were furthest apart.' He put his arms around

her, drawing her gently against him. He said in a low voice,

'When the Tristan M move was first suggested, I nearly vetoed it.

I was terrified to face you again in spite of everything, I'd

staked so much on seeing you—on there being something left. I

knew I could get to see you through your uncle, but it almost

killed me trying to figure what your reaction would be.' He

groaned. ' I f you'd treated me with indifference, as I half-

expected, I think I'd have cut my throat. And when I found you

were dating that pathetic creature, God, I was so jealous I could

have killed him.' She said in a small voice, 'How do you think I

felt, watching you with Celia?' He smiled wrily. 'Exactly how I

wanted you to feel, darling. Why else would I have spent all

those hours letting her bore me to death? She provided me with an

excuse to call at the house whenever I wanted.' 'But you spent

the night with her,' Laura bit her lip. ' I saw your car outside

the house the night we went to the restaurant when the storm woke

me.' 'The car was there, but I wasn't,' he said. T went for a

long walk that night, going over every detail of everything you'd

said and done, asking myself if I had a hope in hell of getting

you back.' He grimaced. ' I remember that storm. I got drenched.

At the time it seemed like divine retribution.' He stared down at

her. 'Did you really think I'd slept with Celia?' She said

unhappily, 'Well, she'd made it clear from the start that she

wanted you and you were a free agent, after all. And she always

talked as if you had serious intentions about her.' 'Well, she

knows differently now,' he said cynically. 'Don't worry about

your pretty cousin ,darling. Her ego is far too armour plated to

allow any real damage to be done. She was on the make for a rich

husband, and I fitted the bill. But I blotted my copybook where

Celia was concerned by rejecting all the palatial residences she

had lined up and choosing Mill Cottage.' He paused. 'There's one

thing, Laura. Wherever we live, I have to provide a home for

Clare and the children.

She's been desperately lonely since my father died, which is why

I brought her to live near me, but if you really can't face the

arrangement...' ' I like her,' Laura confessed. ' I didn't want

to, but I couldn't help myself?' 'I'm glad.' He bent and kissed

her, his mouth tender. When he lifted his head, she said, 'Did

you really ask her to marry you?' 'Yes,' he said. 'When I found

out she was expecting the first child my namesake incidentally.

Half-brothers both called Jason after their father. Have you ever

heard anything so ridiculous?' He paused. ' I wasn't in love with

her ever, but I was fond of her and I felt guilty because I'd

persuaded her to join Tristans' with me.' His lips tightened. ' I

knew all about my father's habit of loving and leaving them, and

it turned my stomach. I couldn't bear to think of it happening to

her. But then I hadn't realised that they really loved each

other.' He sighed. 'He was with her when he was taken ill , and

she was the last person he mentioned before he died. He asked me

to take care of her, and the boy, and their unborn child. I had

to agree,' he added warily. 'I'd already lost you, it seemed, so

I felt I had nothing more to lose. And watching Clare grieve for

my father was almost therapeutic. It seemed so genuine and

dignified after my mother's histrionics.' She said slowly, 'Your

mother has been a very unhappy woman. I should hate her for what

she did to us, but I can't any more than I can hate Uncle

Martin.' He said drily, 'The two of them should get on well

together. They're both bloody dangerous when cornered. I could

hardly believe it when she agreed to tell you the truth after all

this time.' 'Why do you think she did?' He shrugged. 'Because

she's a very sick woman, with not a great deal of time to make

amends. Because she knew that I was going to win you back, even

if it took the rest of my life, and if she wanted to go on seeing

me, that was the price she had to pay. Because she thought I

might get Clare to tell you the truth.' 'Why didn't you?' He

shrugged. 'Would you have believed her? I couldn't take the risk.

It was essential that you hear the whole messy story from someone

you would have to believe—and my mother was the only person.'

His mouth twisted. T told her it could no longer go on being her

little secret to take with her to the grave, because there was no

way I was going to let her ruin my life a second time. I'd

guessed ages ago you were planning to go away—I found a pile of

magazines in the drawing room with advertisements marked. I

realised time was running out for me, and that was when I

enlisted my mother's help and set up this scheme to get you to

Warwick.' He paused. 'So—when you dropped your bombshell, all I

needed to do was 'phone your friend Bethany and get her on my

side.' He groaned. 'My God, I thought my mother was tough.' Laura

said ruefully, ' I should have realised something wasn't right.

She said such odd things—and it was all such an amazing

coincidence that I should have smelled a rat, but I suppose I

wasn't thinking very straight.' He drew her close to him again.

'I'm glad you weren't. You did just what I wanted.' He raised her

hands to his lips and kissed them. 'We'll go into Warwick

presently and buy you another ring.' She shook her head. 'There's

no need. I didn't get rid of the first one. I couldn't bear to.

Itls-in my bag in the house.' 'Then I ' l l buy you a diamond to

wear with it,' he promised. He framed her face between his hands.

'The other night, after we made love, I was so happy. I looked at

you lying beside me, your hair spread all over the pillow, and I

remembered that other portrait of you I always meant to paint.'

She smiled, blushing a little. ' I remember too.' She quoted,

'"Laura fulfilled"', and he nodded. He bent his head and kissed

her very slowly and sensuously, making her heart sing with

excitement and joy. He whispered, 'Will you pose for me again, my

dearest love?' She smiled up at him, her eyes alive with love,

and the promise of love. 'Whenever you wish,' she said demurely.

' I have nothing else planned for the next fifty years or so.' He

said, 'Consider yourself hired.' He kissed her fiercely,

possessively and she responded with passionate eagerness, her

body rejoicing in the warmth and strength of his arms around her.

Whatever the problems, from that moment on they would face them

together. Neither of them would ever be alone again.

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