Alien in the House (37 page)

O
UR MUCH SMALLER
group of six entered the big auditorium that was the Floor of the House of Representatives. It reminded me a lot of the giant classrooms I'd been in in college, if they'd had incredibly cushy seats and been covered in nice carpet, wood paneling, and pictures of former U.S. politicians and heroes.

We headed down to what Brewer said was called the Well of the House, which was in front of the Speaker and other bigwigs' seats, with the main body of the House sitting in a semicircle going up.

The place was packed, though there were a few empty seats here and there. Presumed they were the seats of the dead representatives, because it looked like anyone else with a pulse was in attendance.

Brewer and Nathalie led the way. “The Senate's here,” he said quietly as they stepped past us. “That's why the balcony is so packed. No wonder they wouldn't let Jeff put this off.”

Took Jeff's arm as we followed them, Reader and Gower behind us. “I'm getting stage fright.”

Jeff chuckled, though it sounded forced. “All you have to do is stand there and look supportive, sexy, and gorgeous, baby. You've got the last two covered with ease.”

“Flattery will get
you
everywhere. I think all you do is have to stand there and look presidential and commanding. You're good at commanding, should be a piece of cake.” He was especially good at commanding in the bedroom, but this probably wasn't the appropriate time or place to share that.

“Love how you think,” Jeff murmured. “And before you ask, all my blocks are up, on the highest levels. I just read the expression on your face. Thanks for focusing us back onto the priorities, baby.”

Looked up and around as we strolled on down the aisle. Was fairly sure I spotted Senators Armstrong and McMillan in the balcony audience. They weren't sitting with Senator Kramer. In fact, as I looked around the room and spotted some of the Cabal of Evil in the balcony areas, Armstrong was nowhere near the rest of them. Interesting.

We reached the Well and the Speaker of the House came down from his chair to Put Us At Our Ease. It was clear he was going out of his way to be personable and jolly. I didn't think he came by jolly naturally, but it was nice of him to make the effort.

There were photographers. Noticed them because they started snapping as soon as the Speaker joined us. Realized this was a great way for an enemy to get close.

Examined them as well as I could. Most of them had their cameras up and were flashing pictures. One of them smiled at me and, when I caught his eye, winked. Oliver was here, and I felt oddly better. Not like any of us were safe simply because Mister Joel Oliver was in attendance, but at least someone else on the Floor was on our side.

Things were explained, more to Jeff than to me. I wasn't paying a lot of attention, mostly because I was too busy scanning the room. We'd avoided a lot of security checks by taking the gate, but the assassins I knew or knew of could circumvent those easily. And sure, Rahmi and Rhee felt they could handle the force field, but I hadn't had time to ask them how it really worked. Maybe it couldn't stop projectiles.

“Don't be nervous,” Nathalie whispered to me.

“Why are there so many reporters? I thought all the photo ops happened after this, in the Speaker's office or something.”

“This is an incredibly historic moment,” Nathalie said. “Enjoy it. Your life will change forever, but at the same time, your husband is doing something greater than just paying attention to his own interests.”

I nodded. Wasn't the time or place to mention that my husband had spent his entire life doing something greater than just things that would benefit his own interests. Maybe that's why the President had felt it was an easy choice to ask Jeff to take this position. Perhaps the President was right.

There was some discussion about what book Jeff should swear on. Gower said that the Judeo-Christian Bible was a-okay with the A-Cs. This didn't fly for the Speaker, however, seeing as Jeff had to swear or affirm on something he believed and agreed with, at least as near as I could tell.

“Dammit,” Reader said under his breath.

“What?”

“Our A-Cs don't have a specific book like we do. They have a set of beliefs they follow that they hand down orally. This shouldn't be a big deal, but I think everyone's jumpy because Jeff's an A-C.”

There were a lot of things I could have done. And probably standing back and keeping my mouth shut would have been what Mrs. Darcy Lockwood of The Washington Wife class would have recommended, especially because there were reporters and cameramen in the room and Nathalie had said this was a historic moment, and I knew she was right.

But if that's what Lockwood would have suggested, then I was going to do the exact opposite. And historic events could turn into historic disasters if allowed. Besides, I had two Amazonian Princesses in the audience somewhere to continue to impress. Time to cowgirl up and channel Mom.

Stood up straight and stepped up next to Jeff. “Excuse me, I can't help but note that we're fretting about what book Jeff swears on?”

“Ah, yes, Missus Martini,” the Speaker said, seeming shocked that I was speaking. Well, no time like the present for him to learn.

“That's Ambassador Martini, Mister Speaker. I'll thank you to remember that in the future, we're a little touchy about titles. However, we're not nearly as touchy about religious texts. I happen to be a Jewish-Catholic mix and since Representative Martini is my husband, and also since our Supreme Pontifex, the religious leader of every A-C on Earth, has said the Bible is just fine by us, use the Bible. Now. Or you can explain to the President why you've given me another reason to get touchy about how the U.S. government is treating my husband and people.”

The Speaker stared at me. Everyone was quiet for a moment. Then he nodded. “Well put, Ambassador, thank you.”

I nodded and stepped back into my Good Wifely Place. The Speaker went on with his explanations to Jeff of what was going to happen.

“I love watching you work,” Reader said out of the side of his mouth.

“Dude, stay quiet,” I replied in the same way. “If I release the Inner Hyena I think it'll ruin the effect.”

The Speaker nodded to Jeff and held the Bible in his hand. Jeff put his left hand on the Bible and raised his right. Gower stood between them, a little back, giving his blessing by overseeing this event, as was the A-C requirement for this kind of thing. He looked solemn, but also proud.

Jeff looked over at Gower, who smiled and nodded. I'd seen White do the same when he was Pontifex. Jeff nodded and when he turned back to the Speaker, he looked confident, resolved, and also proud.

And all of a sudden this went from being something that we were worried about and an inconvenience to a moment in time I knew I would always remember because my husband was about to take a position of very public importance.

Jeff looked the part, too. He was a natural leader, of course, and he radiated the same confidence he had when he was the Head of Field. The way the lights hit him made him almost glow.

Slid my arm through Reader's. He patted my hand. Found myself wishing that we hadn't sent Christopher and White and all the others elsewhere—this was a moment they wouldn't have with us, with Jeff. I suddenly realized why everyone's families came to a swearing-in like this in full force.

The cameras snapped like crazy. Jeff was going to make the front page of every paper in the world that had anyone who wasn't totally blind in charge. Because he looked almost breathtakingly beautiful, solemn, and inspiring—like you want your elected officials to look but they so rarely did.

The Speaker cleared his throat. “Do you, Jeffrey Stuart Martini, accept this position representing the great state of New Mexico's Second District and do you understand that which you are accepting?”

Jeff nodded. “I do solemnly swear that I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same; that I take this obligation freely, without any mental reservation or purpose of evasion; and that I will well and faithfully discharge the duties of the office on which I am about to enter: So help me God.”

Jeff lowered his hand and the Speaker shook it, while they both smiled and Jeff got a standing ovation. I clapped too—it helped me focus on something besides blinking back tears.

N
OTHING MUCH OF
importance happened once the ceremony was over. We were all taken to the Speaker's office and a tonnage of pictures were taken.

Oliver joined us here, of course. “You look a little, oh, disappointed,” he said to me while Jeff took yet another couple hundred pictures with various politicians.

“Long story, but some of Jeff's closest family weren't here. I hadn't realized that they should have been, either.”

“Not to worry. I took video of the entire event. I also had three other
World Weekly News
cameramen with me, so if one video didn't come out right, the others will.”

“MJO, you rock the awesomeness. It won't make up for no pictures of them with Jeff, though.”

“We all have sacrifices to make. Speaking of which, pictures and sacrifices both, I believe you're up.” Oliver escorted me to Jeff and the next round of Picture Frenzy started. After fifteen minutes I hoped my smile didn't look too fake or plastered on. After another fifteen minutes I didn't care if it looked fake—I was far more worried that I'd never be able to close my mouth again.

But finally it ended. The Speaker gave Jeff a stack of bills, with instructions to read them all, because they were going to be going to vote in the first week of January.

“Should have brought a briefcase,” Jeff said as we and our ever-growing entourage left the Speaker's office.

“I left it at home, sorry.”

Chuckie joined us, Cliff in tow. “Nicely done.”

“Went well,” Cliff agreed. “So, how are you guys getting home? You can't go the same way you came.”

This was true. We had a lot of people with us now, and more than that, we had a lot of reporters around.

“We'll call for the limos.” Of course, our drivers were here with us or out hunting for Colonel Hamlin. “Or, you know, maybe not.”

Jeff took my coat from Len and helped me into it. “We'll take a cab. Well, a fleet of cabs,” he added with a laugh as he put his coat and hat on.

Managed not to say that he should have worn the hat and trench while being sworn in, too. This look didn't need to be shared with the world—this look belonged to
me
, and I was going to be both extravagant in its use and miserly in who else got to enjoy it. “I'm a little nervous about being outside, Jeff.”

“Who can blame you?” Cliff asked. “I drove over here. Why don't I drop at least the two of you and Chuck at the Embassy?” He grinned. “Besides, I just got a new car and I really want to show it off.”

“Well, how can we refuse an offer like that?” Jeff asked. “But what about everyone else?”

Chuckie shrugged. “If you leave,” he said quietly, “the interesting person leaves, the rest can go home by more mundane means.”

Oliver was near us and he nodded. “I and the rest will follow the four of you. Guaranteed.”

“Then that's the plan,” Cliff said. “If that's okay with you, Congressman.”

Jeff shook his head. “Jeff, unless we have to be formal for some reason now.”

“Nope, just teasing you. You ready to go?”

“Let me tell the others what we're doing first.” Extracted myself and went to Gower, who was the closest. Explained the plan. “So, once we're gone, you can get everyone else home.”

“Sounds like a good plan, Kitty.” He hugged me. “Thanks for handling the situation on the Floor.”

“Oh, I figured you'd win eventually, but why waste everyone's time and your patience? Are you going to the Embassy or to your Residence?”

“Residence. I want to make sure everyone's fine there.” He grinned. “And Uncles Paul and James want a little Jamie-Katt time.”

“You had her last night.”

“Not really. By the time we got home, all the kids were in bed and had been for hours. I'd offer to keep her overnight with us again, but I'd imagine you two would like to see your daughter.”

“Yeah. Should we have had her here?”

“No,” Reader said as he joined us. “Unless you were desperate for a photo op.”

“We absolutely were not. I'm just feeling guilty about us not having everyone here.”

Gower shook his head. “Everyone for us means
everyone
. We care about that for weddings much more than for appointments like this.”

“Okay, I'll trust you on that one. What are we going to do about Vance and the Brewers?”

“Escort them home, unless you want them back at the Embassy,” Reader said.

“I don't know. Jeff just got assigned homework by the Speaker of the House and I'm feeling tired from the last couple of days. But I think we need to have guards on them, Edmund Brewer in particular.”

“We'll handle it,” Reader said. “You get going, your ride looks impatient.”

Cliff didn't actually look impatient, but I could tell that he, Chuckie, and Jeff were ready to go. I hurried over to Vance and the Brewers. “I think Jeff and I are hitching a ride with Cliff. Hopefully that means the paparazzi will clear off and leave you guys alone.”

Nathalie laughed. “It makes me nostalgic. But do you want us to go back to your Embassy, or would you like to just go home and collapse?”

“Honestly? I'd like to collapse. But I want you guys to be careful. There's been a lot of bad and weird going on.”

Brewer nodded. “Let's all get a good night's sleep and we can regroup tomorrow. I'll be happy to help Jeff with the bills. Not that I don't think that he can manage them all on his own, but I had help when I came on and it really does make it easier if you have someone to show you the ropes.”

“Absolutely. You know, you've been over to our place, why don't we go over to yours tomorrow? That way Nathalie can show me her portfolio while you and Jeff work?”

They both beamed at me. Clearly this was a suggestion they liked. I knew without asking that Jeff would like it, too. After all, he'd been trying to have us become friends with this couple for months now.

“It's a date,” Nathalie said. “Brunch at our place? Bring your daughter, too, if you want. We don't have children yet but that doesn't mean we don't like them.”

“We'll see how she's behaving.” Jamie was always pretty darned well-behaved but I wasn't sure how good an idea it was to have her exposed right now. There were assassins and Clarence and probably bears, oh my. “She's had a fun couple of days and may just want to stay home.”

“See you around eleven, then?” Brewer asked.

“It's a date. I'll call you if something changes, but otherwise, we'll see you tomorrow.” Gave them both hugs, which got photographed, and then trotted back to Jeff.

“I've told the jocks what's going on,” he said. “They'll gather anyone else who matters and get them home. They already have the princesses in tow. And the mountain of bills I have to read and form an opinion of in a week.”

Had a moment's worry about leaving Rahmi and Rhee unattended and in the care of males, but decided that they'd behaved well so far and there was no time like the present for them to get used to how things here worked.

Cliff led us out of the Capitol building. True to expectations, all the media followed us. It was raining, so I put up my hood. “How far are you?” Chuckie asked.

“I parked on Southwest Drive,” Cliff said. “No worries, we're not too far. Can't wait for you to see it, it's great. I haven't been this excited about a car in years.”

“So, what kind did you get?” I asked as we walked quickly through the wet. Chuckie didn't care that much about cars and since A-Cs had reflexes that were so good they actually weren't able to safely drive, I was the only other “car person” here.

Cliff grinned. “Toyota RAV Four EV. All electric. It's great. Wanted it in red, but they only make it in white and blue, so I got the blue. Tricked it out with everything extra I could, too.”

Spotted a blue car in the near distance. “Is that it?”

“Yeah. And, don't worry about being cold, Kitty. It has the remote engine starter. I can have it running and warm inside before we ever get there.”

“I'm not worried about being cold, but if your car can do something about the wet, that'd be great.”

He laughed. “Well, I'll get her started and the heat on. That'll help.”

As Cliff pulled out his key fob and clicked the button I felt something with feathers slam into me.

So when Cliff's car exploded, I wasn't nearly as surprised as I could have been.