And The Beat Goes On (9 page)

The next morning, I had class. And I was dreading this day. Now I would have to see her. If I slept with someone else the night before, this may have been easier. I could convince myself Athena didn’t mean anything to me.

But she did.

The students took their seats, and Athena sat directly in front of me. I looked at my computer and ignored her gaze. She was staring directly at me but I didn’t meet her look.

After I cleared my throat, I got on with the lecture. I didn’t believe in information taught by text
books. I believed in experience. So I relayed my travels in the business world and how I moved up the ranks. Students seemed to be more interested in that anyway. I didn’t look at Athena once.

When the class was over, I returned to my desk and picked up a random sheet of paper. It was the roster for my class. I didn’t need it but I stared at it like it was the most important thing in the world. I listened to the class file out and waited for Athena to leave.

She was the last person in the room and she took her time grabbing her bag.

Just go.

When she walked past my desk, I didn’t want her to stop. I didn’t want to talk to her. It would be too hard.

“Jeremy.”

No. Please don’t do this to me.
I put the paper down and looked at her. “Yes?”

She gave me a beautiful smile, one that made my toes feel numb. She was wearing a black dress that had roses decorated across it. A red scarf was around her throat, and she wore a light brown jacket. She always looked so perfect. I desperately wanted to know what her body looked like underneath.
“I enjoyed your lecture today.”

“Thank you.”
Keep it short.

She shifted her weight a few times while she stood in front of my desk. I knew she was going to ask me something.

Don’t ask me to see you.

“Would you like to come over and see my other paintings? I’ll cook dinner and we can share a bottle of wine.”

Damn it, Athena. Say no. Say no.
“That sounds great.”
Why did I say that? Ugh.

Her smile stretched even wider. “Great. Can you be at my place in an hour?”

It’s not too late. I could still get out of it.
Say something.
“I’ll bring the wine
.” I was out of control.

“I’ll see you then.” She left my desk and walked out the door.

I rested my face in my hands and sighed. “What did I get myself into?”

♫

I stood in front of her doorway for a moment. I didn’t knock. The wine was in my hand. I had my driver pick it up from the restaurant. It was vintage and very expensive. But I always went above and beyond for my girl.

Damn, don’t say that!

I took a deep breath then knocked on the door.

“Coming!” She answered it a moment later, wearing the same dress as earlier. But now the scarf and jacket were absent. Her shoulder
s were rounded and toned. Her arms were equally thin. I wondered if she worked out.

The dress was shorter than I realized. I
t rose to the middle of her thigh. She had leggings on earlier, but now they were absent. And I liked the look of her bare legs. Her thighs were toned and firm. Her calves had noticeable muscle. And her feet were perfect. The nails were painted pink.

Her brown hair was slightly curly at the ends. It was lustrous and framed her face. I recalled the last time I felt the strands. They were silky and soft. And I remembered the scent.

I realized I was just staring at her…like an idiot. “Hello.”

Her smile widened when I spoke. “Hi.”

I glanced at her body. “You look…very nice.” I had different words to describe her—all inappropriate.

She eyed the jeans and t-shirt I wore. She said she never saw me in anything but a suit, and I wanted to dress casual for her. That was something I’ve never done before. All my relationships were treated as business transactions. I never let anyone see what was underneath. “You look nice too.” Her eyes glanced at my body in approval.

I liked that look.

“Come in.” She opened the door wider and let me step inside.

I placed the wine on the counter.

She picked it up and examined it. “Wow. This looks expensive.”

I shrugged.

“You have very expensive taste.”

I eyed her, looking at her intently. “I do.”

Her cheeks blushed then she looked away. “I’ll get the wine opener.” She uncorked it and poured two glasses.

I smelled the scent of herbs roasting. “What’s for dinner?”

“Chicken, rice
, and vegetables.”

“That sounds wonderful.”

“I can do more than just paint.” She winked at me.

I bet you can. Jeremy, knock it off.

Suddenly, she grabbed my hand. I automatically flinched when we touched. The warmth of her palm suddenly made me feel cold. My senses ignited. Every beat of my heart was suddenly amplified. The smell of the kitchen was more intense. I saw colors I didn’t notice before.

“I want to show you my other pieces,” she said excitedly. She pulled me to the couch. Different paintings were placed on the floor in front of the TV. They were an eclectic grouping. Each one was distinctive and different.

I didn’t just buy her painting because I wanted to spend more time with her. I genuinely thought it was good. When I saw it, I was surprised and impressed. I’ve become more interested in art every since, especially hers.

I held up an
image of the English pastureland. A distinct shadow was to the left. Was it a storm? The shadow of a building? The setting of the sun? I stared at it for a long time, trying to figure it out myself.

The grass was vibrant and strong, and horses were feeding in the pasture. A white fence surrounded the area. And a swing hung from the large oak tree. It looked so real that I wondered if it was.

Athena stared at me the whole time, watching me examine her painting.

“Is this a real place?” I asked.

She nodded. “My grandmother’s house.”

I examined the painting again. London had become a larger city over time. The population increased, and instead of moving further into the city, it seemed to stretch out. I wondered if that was the significance of the shadow.
“Was it taken away?”

Surprise filled her eyes. “Yes.”

I put the painting back on the floor. “Was the pasture replaced with the city?”

She nodded.

“I’m sorry.”

“They offered her a lot of money, but it didn’t change anything. They still took away a piece of her soul. Parliament needs to understand that the countryside is just as important as the city. It needs to be protected.
I loved visiting when I was little. I can still smell the roses when I imagine I’m there.”

Her story broke my hea
rt. It wasn’t a tragedy and no one died, but seeing her sad automatically made me upset. “I’m sorry.”

A smile stretched her lips. “You’re always sorry.”

“I mean it.”

She rested her hand on my thigh. “I know you do.”

Her affection had increased since our last meeting. But we’ve been flirting back and forth for a month. I guess the move wasn’t surprising. And I wanted her to do more than just touch my thigh. She squeezed it gently, showing her aggression. I turned my face toward her and stared at the perfect features of her face. “You’re a very talented woman.”

“Thank you.” She started to blush. She leaned close to me. I wasn’t sure what would happen, but I knew I wouldn’t stop it if it did. If she wanted me to kiss her, I would. But my conscious came back to me. I shouldn’t. I knew I shouldn’t.

A timer in the kitchen went off. She flinched then left the couch. “Dinner’s ready.”

Damn.

She set the table and we sat down. Her apartment was very small. The living room and the kitchen were together. A very short hallway led to two separate doors. I assumed it was her bedroom and the bathroom.

Despite the small space, it was well decorated. She incorporated several shelves to store extra items. Two red chairs hung on the wall next to pictures. I assumed she stored them there because she had no extra space. That’s when I realized the bottle of wine I brought was more expensive than her rent for the year.

I dug into my food and marveled at the taste. “This is really good.”

“Thank you.” She sipped her wine. “And the wine is
too.”

“Where did you learn to cook?”

“The Internet,” she said with a smile.

“You’re a fast learner.”

“I like cooking. I enjoy eating out once in a while, but it’s too expensive and unhealthy.”

I didn’t know how to cook. If I had to fend for myself, it wouldn’t be good. That’s why I hired Anna to cook and clean. She was a godsend. I made sure she was an older woman so I wouldn’t be tempted to sleep with her. And male housekeepers were hard to come by.

When we finished our dinner, we returned to the couch. I knew I was in trouble when she sat very close to me. She was practically on my lap. I knew I should be open with her and tell her the truth about the man I was. I wasn’t any good for her. But feeling her next to me felt right. I didn’t want to lose that.

She talked about her other paintings, particularly when she created them and why. I was impressed by every image. There wasn’t one better than another. They were all absolutely wonderful.

“Can I buy one from you?”

“What?” She raised an eyebrow.

“Are they for sale?”

“Are you serious?”

“I did just spend ten thousand pounds on a different piece. Why is that surprising?”

“I…I just didn’t suspect you’d be that interested.”

“Well, I am.” I pointed at the image of her grandmother’s house. “How about that one? How much?” I also wanted to give her money to help her out. I didn’t like knowing she lived in a run-down apartment. But I would never be an asshole and insult her living conditions. And I definitely wouldn’t offer her money outright. I had a strong suspicion she’d be offended.

She shook her head. “I don’t want your money. But you can keep it.”

“No,” I said immediately. “I’ll pay you for it. This is your livelihood.”

She moved the painting to the side. “Jeremy, your money is no good here. I mean it.”

I glared at her. “I can’t just take it.”

“I’m giving it to you.” She leaned close to me, her lips just inches from mine. “You’re my first fan. No one else has ever supported me before…besides my mom.”

How did she make my heart melt like that?

She turned her body and placed her legs over mine. Her dress moved up slightly but didn’t show any goodies. But I was tempted to look. Her hand moved around my waist and she leaned close to me.

What was she doing to me?

Then she pressed her face against mine. She didn’t kiss me, but she definitely made my lips burn. The sun had completely set and it was dark in the apartment. Only her kitchen light was on.

I wanted to kiss her but I knew I shouldn’t. She clearly wanted me to. Clearly. My hands remained by my sides, but I couldn’t fight them. I placed one hand on her shin and felt her calve muscle. She was warm. I placed the other on the back of her neck.

My heart raced in my chest. I wa
s afraid I’d have a heart attack because I was nervous. When I fucked random women, my heart was dangerously slow. I wasn’t nervous or scared. It was repetitive and meaningless. But this…this was different. The adrenaline coursed through my veins. I swallowed the lump in my throat.

Her breathing had increased. The warm breath fell on my chin and neck. She was just as nervous as I was. The shared intimacy between us frightened both of us equally. I’d never been so exposed to someone before, especially in such a short amount of time. We’d only been dating…talking…
.doing whatever we were doing for a month and I was…I don’t know what I was.

She pulled away and looked at my lips. I knew what was going to happen. But I wasn’t sure who would move in first. I decided to end the relationship because I couldn’t give her what she deserved, but here I was, giving my heart to her in a way I never did to anyone else.

And I was scared.

But I couldn’t stop myself any longer. I wasn’t in control. And I didn’t want to be.

I gripped the back of her neck then pulled her to my lips. She was just a few inches away, so the distance wasn’t far. And when we touched, I felt the explosion. My lips burned as they pressed against hers. There was more heat and fire between us than any other lover I ever had.

The kiss had barely begun and I was already out of breath.

Her lips were immobile for a moment before she massaged mine. The taste of wine was still on her flesh. I devoured it along with everything else. When I did kiss someone, it was usually aggressive and sexual. There was always tongue and my hands were always grabbing something inappropriate. But I was gentle with Athena.