Angel Fall (22 page)

Why couldn’t he escape this nightmare?

Why couldn’t he get to his window? His soul was loose inside himself, mashing and thrashing back and forth. All that mattered was getting out, but something was holding him in, keeping him locked in this hideous place. Once more he leaped upward, struggling, clawing the air, only to be sucked back in again. Into the clotted, festering mass of skin and bone. If he didn’t get out, he would die.

Suddenly the movement through the air stopped. The cage was lowered onto something flat and cold, and the swarming things vanished. But above him hovered a shape with gigantic glowing wings and a body of green fire. Even in the depths of his agony he knew that he had seen it before, in the feverish dream, lying sweat-drenched in the cathedral. It was the nightmare creature that had flown through the halls spreading suffocating heat and mold and destruction. And now it was hovering over him.

Y
ou-you evil-evil little-little fool-fool…you-you evil-evil little-little fool-fool…you-you evil-evil little-little fool-fool…

Freezing words from a soft lilting voice.

A woman’s voice.

Two voices together.

The same voice, but double.

Scattering words.

Then another voice, muttering, mumbling, whining, terrified.

Wanderspoon.

Fading…gone…silence…

And then…

Strange, pleasant feelings.

Fingers in her hair.

A woman’s fingers softly caressing.

And Amanda heard a gentle voice whisper, “Wake up, my child. It’s time to wake up.”

Slowly her eyes opened. Everything was blurry like in the morning before the sleep is rubbed away. Amanda couldn’t remember a single dream where there had been sleep in her eyes, which meant this could be
real
. If only the blurriness would leave her mind. Reaching up to wipe her eyes, Amanda realized something else. She
could
reach up. Her arms moved. And her body didn’t hurt anymore. When her fingers touched her face, she felt soft skin. So wonderful, just to wake up and not hurt. She rubbed her eyes; it was like rubbing away a layer of crusty glue.

Still blurry.

Where was she? Was that sky up there? And branches? She was lying on something very soft, and the air was heavy with a mulchy sweetness. And she heard bubbling, gurgling sounds. Running water close by.

Another rub and she could see more clearly. Boughs were gently bending over her and beyond them was an azure sky speckled with stars.
Daytime stars
. Finally the blur left her mind. Boreth. She was still on Boreth. Amanda sat up and looked around. And then began the enchantment.

She was in a small forest clearing that could have been the garden of a fairy princess. The bubbling sounds came from a little waterfall that spilled into a shimmering pool. Beneath her was a thick silky blanket of moss. And green. Everything was green. She had never imagined there could be so many different greens. Around her hung dark green ferns the size of pillowcases. And beneath those, tiny ferns with pale green leaves like fairy teardrops. There were tall spindly bushes of yellow green, fat little clumps of gray green.

There was brown green and black green and emerald green. And all of the greens glistened as though every leaf had been polished by a fanatical gardener with a huge bottle of wax. Splashed among the greens were masses of exotic flowers—little purple lippy things with red stamen tongues, clusters of pink blossoms that hung together like bunches of wrong-colored bananas, misty blue and yellow petal-swarms that looked like butterflies but weren’t. And swathed across all of it was a rainbow of crimson and blue-green moss hanging delicately in the branches as though an angel had dropped her mantle on the way to Heaven.

Heaven!

There was an interesting idea. Amanda had never thought much about Heaven. But if there were such a place she imagined it would be like this: a lovely garden where all the ugliness would be swept away. And those crushed with sorrow and pain would wake up to find that everything was all right. In Heaven they would find healing. She looked down at herself. Her skin was smooth and soft. Nothing was growing out of her knees and elbows, no hard crusts of flesh anywhere. Crawling over to the pool, she looked at her reflection—no longer a twisted, ugly shape like a human tree, she was Amanda. Truly and really Amanda! But how had it happened?

She told herself that, dead or alive, it didn’t matter. All that mattered was being this happy. But suddenly the happiness was sucked away in a blind panic.

The baby!

Where was the baby?

Jumping up, she stared around.

Nowhere! He was nowhere!

She was about to start crashing blindly through the bushes to search for him when a soft woman’s voice whispered, “The little one is safe. Don’t be afraid.”

Amanda looked around but couldn’t see anybody. “He’s supposed to be with me all the time. If I’m not dead, I’ve got to take him to the Mountain.”

A sweet laugh echoed from high above. “You’re not dead and this
is
the Mountain.”

“It is?”

“Yes, it is.”

“The…Big Mountain?”

“The biggest.”

“You mean…I’m…here?”

“Here is exactly where you are. You brought the baby home.”

For a moment Amanda stood in shock; then tears came. “You mean…it’s over? We made it?”

“Your journey has ended.”

She felt dizzy and, in her dizziness, started babbling. “This-is-it. We-did-it. I-never-thought-we’d-get-here-but-we-did-and-just-look-at-it-it’s-so-beautiful-I-can’t-even-stand-it.” She babbled until she almost fell into the pool.

The voice in the treetops laughed again. “Be careful or you’re going to get wet.”

“Okay-okay-I-will-it’s-just-all-so-wonderful-and-I-
feel
-wonderful.” Then she paused. “But…could I still see him? I’m-so-used-to-having-him-with-me-we’ve-been-together-so-long-it-feels-weird-when-he’s-not-here-could-I? Would-it-be-all-right?”

The laughing voice replied, “Slow down, my child. Of course, it’s all right. Follow the path beside the stream. It will lead you to him.”

Amanda turned and looked. Flowing away from the pool was a little stream, and next to it lay a path that led off into the forest. Rushing over, she began running through the trees, laughing and calling out. “We made it! We got here! We’re on the Mountain! We did it!”

The soft voice came again. “Doesn’t it feel good to walk and run without pain?”

She stopped, suddenly feeling very guilty. “Yes, it does. I don’t know who you are, but if you’re the one who healed me, I’m sorry for being so ungrateful.” She fought back tears. “I didn’t even say thank you. All I was thinking about was being happy and wanting to see the baby.”

“Your joy is all the thanks I need.”

“Are you the Healer?”

“I am. My name is Melania, and soon we will meet face-to-face. But go slowly and let my forest touch you. All that matters here is loving, and feeling, and being One with the beauty. Hurrying can take the joy away. Breathe deeply. Say to yourself,
Let peace and Oneness enter my heart for I am One with all things
. Will you do that?”

“Yes.”

“Good. And I’ll see you in a little while.” Amanda heard a soft rushing sound in the trees, and she felt as though the person she had been talking to was gone. She looked around. Why was she hurrying through such a lovely place? Bellwind’s island had been beautiful, but the beauty had been veiled in sorrow. There was none of that here. Melania was right; the terrible journey was over. Now was the time to rest. Lifting her head, she closed her eyes and began breathing deeply. Then she whispered, “Let the peace and Oneness of this lovely place enter my heart, for I am one with all things.” Instantly she felt tension leaving her body, replaced with a joyful calm. The colors around her seemed to grow more vivid, and from far away came the echo of singing. It was all so peaceful that she thought about lying down and letting her mind drift in the dreaminess, but she just couldn’t do that until she had seen the baby and shared the joy with him.

Breathing in the sweetness of the forest, she walked on. As the path wound through the trees, the gentle singing grew louder. It was like the voices of many women softly chanting words as old as the ages in a language she couldn’t understand. But just hearing them filled her with joy, as though they were calling to her, telling her she wasn’t alone, that sisters who loved her were waiting a little farther along just a few steps deeper into Heaven.

Closer.

The chant-song grew more complex, voices rising, falling, harmonies within harmonies weaving on the wind. Finally she entered what must have been the oldest part of the forest, and the singing was everywhere. All around her towered trees that looked as though they had been planted at the dawn of time, their trunks covered with ancient moss that hung like robes of dewy splendor. Though they were old beyond imagining, none was gnarled or misshapen. Each one stood straight and tall. Long ago their highest limbs and branches had woven together into an endless vaulted ceiling of pale green leaves through which fell shafts of hazy sunlight. To Amanda it was like being in a forest of tree grandmothers who had gathered to sing when the world was young and had enjoyed it so much that they had kept on singing for ten thousand years. Though all were stately and dignified, there was a softness about them too, like regal old women who love to take little children in their arms. As she walked among them, she realized that each tree had a voice all its own. Some were low and gentle. Others were like singing birds. Often she left the path and stood beneath a particularly beautiful tree so she could hear it apart from the rest.

As Amanda wandered and listened, she became aware of one magnificent voice. It took awhile to hear it clearly, but when she did, she realized it was like no other. It sang a haunting melody that would rise to the treetops, then vanish beneath the thousand harmonies below, only to soar again in heartbreaking loveliness. The more she heard it, the more it felt like the voice was singing the story of her whole life, heartache and joy, pain and happiness, every experience she had ever had, blended and interwoven. Often tears would come to her eyes, and she would find herself whispering, “Yes, that’s the way I felt,” and, “I remember that. How could I have forgotten?”

How long she walked, she had no idea, but constantly the one voice drew her on. Finally she rounded a bend and discovered that the path disappeared at the edge of a lustrous meadow, in the center of which stood a single tree. And it was
glorious
. Its long gentle branches were covered with silver leaves, and out of them grew clusters of shimmering black flowers. Glowing mist drifted from it, creating soft halos in the air. Though it wasn’t tall, the tree seemed to be the center of everything with all the others gathered around it in worship. And the singing voice was coming from within it.

The singing stopped and the voice called to her, “Amanda, my daughter, I’ve waited so long. Come to me.” With wide eyes she crossed the clearing. “Are you…the Healer?”

“I am. Come closer.”

Slowly she walked forward and felt the warm mist surround her.

“You’re…a tree?”

“Does that surprise you?”

“I guess nothing surprises me anymore.”

“Trees are known for their music. Did you like my singing?”

“I loved it, but sometimes it made me cry.”

“That’s because the song was about you. Amanda, dear child of earth, your life is a song of faithfulness and courage.”

“I don’t know about that. All I did was get carried here in a wagon.”

“Your great strength brought you here. But you have traveled far, and I know you are hungry.”

Amanda realized that she was famished. “Well, I haven’t eaten in a long time.”

“Come beneath my branches.”

As she stepped under the tree, she was bathed in a luscious fragrance. Among the flowers she saw fruit so ripe it looked like it would fall to the ground at any moment.

“Hunger you shall never know in my forest.” The voice was coming from above. “I invite you to taste my children.”

“Your children?” The girl was startled.

“Fruit are the children of trees.”

“I never thought of it that way.”

“In ages past all creatures knew such things. No one would take the children of a tree without asking permission of their mother. But that was in a time before time, and it doesn’t matter now. All that matters is that you are with us at last and my forest is here for your pleasure. Take of my little ones. Their sweetness will continue your healing.”

“Am I still sick?”

“Growing well is a journey of many steps, and you are far along. First came the healing of your body. But now must come Oneness to your soul. Eat as much as you desire.”

Though she felt a bit odd about it, Amanda reached up and plucked a piece of fruit. When she bit into it, the taste made her forget everything else. A strange sweetness tingled in her mouth, and each bite made her ache for more. “It’s so good.” She mumbled as juice ran down her chin. After six pieces she had to stop. “I want to keep eating, but I’m so full.” Then something began to happen. The tingling sensation grew and her eyes started to blur. She rubbed them and looked around. What she saw made her knees so weak that if she hadn’t grabbed onto a branch she would have fallen.

She wasn’t in a forest. It was a garden of spirits. The outer shells of everything looked like soft glimmering ghosts. Inside them were living creatures mingling, loving. That’s why the singing had been so complex. She understood now. Every vine, every branch, even the roots under the dirt, all were
one
. Life entwined forever. She looked down. Beneath her was an emerald carpet of soft slender beings, bending and weaving in the wind.

Grass.

That’s what she had always called it. But each blade was different. And every tiny shoot knew who she was and why she was there. And they were singing too, in little voices that had been drowned out by the trees. For a moment she could think their thoughts and feel what it was like to be a blade of grass in a sea of brothers and sisters. No life apart.
One with all
. What joy there was in Oneness.

Slowly Amanda walked back out into the clearing. Before her stood hundreds of lovely tree-spirit women, their arms reaching toward her. Suddenly she could understand their language. Their chant-song was about her, and how brave she was, and how she had come home to them from a long and terrible journey. Most of all it was about how they loved her and wanted to make her One with the life that was in them. Amanda was about to run to them when she heard a rustling sound behind her.

Turning, she saw that the beautiful tree had disappeared. Standing in its place was a tall slender woman. Her skin was soft brown and her eyes were violet. Her long hair was like silver leaves and woven in it were clusters of black flowers. She wore a gown of moss and her feet were bare. Around her shimmered halos of silver mist. Her loveliness was so delicate and ethereal that Amanda felt like she was in the presence of a goddess of dreams.