Authors: Stephanie Hoffman McManus
Nash
September 6
Senior year . . .
Derek was waiting for me outside the cafeteria, talking to our buddy Jeff and his girlfriend Sam. Derek lifted his chin when he saw me. “Taco Bell today, man?”
“Nah, you guys go ahead. I’m going to stick around here today,” I told them.
“You sure?”
“Yeah. I’ll see you guys later.” I’d given the few bucks I had to Trin to make sure she got lunch today. I knew D would buy if I asked, but I hated having to tell him I was broke because my asshole older brother pissed away his money on God knows what again, and what I made helping out at D’s dad’s restaurant had to keep our fucking lights and water on. D would tell his dad and then money for hours I didn’t work would show up on my paycheck. I didn’t want to be a charity case. I’d pick up an additional shift one night this week, and I could eat on my shift tonight.
With nothing better to do, I passed up the crowded cafeteria and opted to waste my lunch period outside. When the weather allowed, a large part of the student body that didn’t leave campus, congregated outdoors. There was a vacant spot under an elm tree around the side of the building. Digging out my sketchpad and pencils, I headed for the spot in the grass, but stopped short when I saw my tiny, blonde partner sitting up against the side of the building. Looked like she had earbuds in while she ate her home packed lunch. I was curious what the princess listened to. Miley? Bieber? Beyonce? She was probably a T Swift girl, but what was she doing sitting outside by herself?
Trading my sketchpad for her notebook, I changed directions and brought myself to stand over her. My shadow engulfed her and she lifted her chin, tugging out one earbud. I tossed the notebook down. It smacked against the paved walkway.
“I don’t know how your notes help you at all. They may as well be in Chinese.” She had the messiest handwriting of any girl I’d ever seen.
She snatched up the notebook defensively. “Not my fault you can’t read,” she grumbled.
“Not this again. We’ve had this argument before.” I dropped down beside her, giving her shoulder a nudge. “Speaking of, why’d you make up the story about me forgetting my notes? Why lie to him?”
She pulled the other earbud out and hit something on her iPod, stopping the music. “Because, if I told him what we were arguing about and what led to that argument, he would have hit you.”
I snickered. “Trying to protect me, eh?” That was laughable.
“No. The opposite, because if he hit you, you would have beat the crap out of him.” My eyebrows lifted, but she ignored my reaction. “He doesn’t need to be suspended or injured and have to sit out any games, but he’s too hot headed to think about that.” Pleased and amused covered how I was feeling in that moment.
“So you’re admitting I can kick your boyfriend’s ass?”
She rolled her eyes and then cocked her head in an irritated look. “You didn’t strike me as the kind of guy who needs his ego fed.”
“I don’t, but I won’t deny I like hearing it from your lips.”
“Did you come over here just to play more of your games? If so, I’d like to go back to my lunch.”
I eyed the bag of chips in her lap. Shooting my hand out, I snatched one from the bag. “What the hell are these?” Chips weren’t supposed to be green.
“They’re kale chips. They’re good.”
I gave her a doubtful look as I popped it in my mouth. They didn’t completely suck. “Not bad,” I swallowed. Then I grabbed her mp3 player to satisfy my curiosity. “What were you listening to?” I glanced at the screen. Not Taylor Swift. “The Civil Wars,” I said, mildly impressed.
“What were you expecting? Justin Bieber?”
I just laughed and shrugged. “Maybe.” I scrolled through the rest of her playlist. Ashes and Embers
.
Maroon 5. Modest Mouse. A few country artists, and a couple more obscure indie alternative bands.
Aha.
Taylor Swift. Knew it.
“What’s with the smug grin?”
I lifted my eyes. “Just confirming a theory.”
She snatched her phone from my hands. “Don’t make fun of my music.”
“I would never,” I feigned offense.
She ignored me and popped a couple chips in her mouth and then pulled pink plastic Tupperware from her matching insulated lunch bag. She popped open a container with a fat sandwich. I hoped she didn’t hear my stomach growl. Being hungry fucking sucked.
Money would be tighter now that summer was over and I was back in school. Even trying to pick up extra shifts here and there, I couldn’t work as many hours. Part of me considered dropping out. Wasn’t like I’d be going to college or anything, but I wanted to finish for Trin. Our parents dropped out and so had our older brother Tucker. I wanted to show her that we didn’t have to follow in their footsteps. She could make something of herself. She was smart and a good kid. But it was fucking hard trying to make sure she had good clothes and food to eat and whatever she needed while trying to keep myself in school. Tucker couldn’t be counted on, and honestly, I didn’t want anything to do with the money he brought in, but sometimes I didn’t have a choice. We needed it, even if I hated how he made it.
Watching her wrap her lips around that sandwich and take a hearty bite sent another stab of hunger through my stomach. I needed something to distract myself.
“So, when should we get together to work on the project?”
“I think we have to pick a book before we worry about that.”
“We already did, like ten minutes ago, or weren’t you standing there?”
Her brow wrinkled in a cute frown. “You were serious about
Pride and Prejudice
?”
“Yeah. Don’t tell me you don’t want to do it. It is your favorite book isn’t it?”
“How do you know that?”
I chuckled and grabbed for her backpack, reaching inside to pull out the worn leather bound copy. I held it up. “Not that hard to figure out. I swear you’ve carried this thing around with you every day for three years.”
The creases on her forehead deepened. “How do you know that?”
“I notice things.”
“About me?”
“About a lot of people, but yeah, you.”
She worried her bottom lip between her teeth as she seemed to take that in. “What else have you noticed about me?”
“Wouldn’t you like to know,” I teased. “But quit changing the subject. I’m trying to have an important discussion about our project, and you’re distracting.”
“Fine,” she huffed. “We have until Monday to do the plot and character analysis. I have cheer practice until five every day, but I could meet you at the library one night this week after five. Just not Friday.”
Right, because she’d be cheering for her douchebag boyfriend in her tiny skirt at the big game. Wouldn’t catch me there even if I did enjoy the sight of her legs in that skirt. “Can’t. I’m busy every night this week.” I couldn’t afford to take a shift off, even for homework. “I could do Saturday night.” I worked the day shift on weekends.
“I have plans Saturday night. What about Sunday?”
“Sunday doesn’t work for me.” Sunday was family dinner night, which was usually just me and Trin, because Tucker couldn’t be bothered to actually give a shit about family, but I wouldn’t blow Trin off. I knew our dinners meant something to her, even if it was just the two of us eating mac and cheese from a box because that’s all we had sometimes.
Frustration tugged at her features, but she did her best to keep it down. “Then I guess I can change my plans on Saturday,” she said reluctantly. I hoped they were plans with Jeremy.
“Okay, seven good for you?”
“Seven? The library closes at five on Saturdays.”
“Sorry, I don’t get off work until five-thirty, and trust me, you’ll want me to go home and shower.” I always smelled like grease and meat when I left the restaurant.
“Oh. I didn’t know you had a job. Seven will work then. You can come over to my place, unless you’d prefer we work at yours.”
“No, yours is good.” No way did I want Shaeleigh Bradford stepping foot inside my house. If she didn’t think I was trash already, she would definitely change her mind if she saw our dump. Not that I really cared what someone like her thought, but she definitely wouldn’t feel comfortable at my place.
“Okay,” she took another bite of that delicious looking club sandwich, completely oblivious that there wasn’t much I wouldn’t have done in that moment for a bite. I let Trin have the last of the milk on her cereal this morning, so I had a bowl of dry, generic Cheerios, because you could get them cheap in a big ass bag.
“So have you read
Pride and Prejudice
before?” She set the second half of her sandwich aside and popped open another container with perfectly sliced green apples and a little dipping cup of peanut butter.
“No, but I’m sure you have the thing memorized. I’m confident you can break it down for me.”
“You need to read it,” she protested. “It’s so good. It won’t be the same if I just tell you about it.” She dipped one of her apple slices into the peanut butter and then into her mouth, crunching down on the juicy apple. I couldn’t pull my eyes away from her lips. Mostly because of the food. Yeah, it was just the food.
“Jane Austen’s not really my style.”
“Please read it.” She batted her stupidly long lashes, enhanced by the make-up crap she wore, and pouted her lips just slightly.
“Sorry, sweetheart,” I couldn’t help myself from reaching out and stealing one of her apple slices, “that shit’s not going to work on me.”
She went full blown pout. “Fine, what do I have to do to get you to read it?” she asked, and then thought better of it. “And don’t say anything dirty.”
A laugh slipped from my lips, because that’s exactly where my mind went. “Then there’s nothing you can do. Not reading it.”
Her shoulders slumped in defeat. “Well at least take my copy, and maybe you’ll change your mind. I can tell you’re really tempted.”
“Yeah, okay,” I chuckled. I grabbed the book, shoving it in my bag. No way in hell was I reading it, though.
“Kellen?” A bubbly voice sounded from a few feet away. We both looked up at the intrusion. My sister was standing a few feet away, looking at me with Shaeleigh curiously.
“Hey Trin, did you eat lunch already?” I asked casually, but I was checking up on her. I needed to know she’d eaten.
She bobbed her head. “Yeah, if I had known you were staying for lunch, I would have eaten with you.” What she really meant was that she would have shared her lunch. Her eyes were knowing and guilty because I’d given her my lunch money.
Damn it.
It was only her second day of high school. This was not the kind of shit fourteen year old girls were supposed to worry about.
“You have to put up with me enough, you should eat with your friends.”
She nodded again, but there was something in the way she ducked her eyes, and kicked at the ground that I didn’t like, but then her eyes flicked to Shaeleigh, who’d been quietly observing us.
“Oh, sorry. Shae, this is my sister, Trinity.”
I was relieved when Shae smiled brightly up at her and Trin smiled tentatively back. “We have creative cooking sixth period together, right?”
My sister nodded her head–it was the class I told her to take because they got to eat in there–and then looked at me again. “Will I see you after school?”
“No. I have a shift. Find Derek and he’ll give you a ride home.”
“Okay. Then I guess I’ll see you when you get home tonight. And I’ll see you in cooking class.” She gave Shae another goofy smile and then bounced off.
“She’s sweet.” I looked for any sign on Shae’s face that she wasn’t being genuine, but found none.
“Yeah, she is.”
“How many siblings do you have?”
“Two. We have an older brother. What about you?”
“I don’t have any brothers or sisters.” I detected a bit of sadness behind her words. She nibbled on her apples, and conversation stalled. I didn’t know why I was still sitting here with her, other than I was enjoying myself. But again, it raised the question of why she was sitting out here by herself, instead of with her horde. They usually flocked around the quad.
“Do you want the rest of this?” She was holding out the second half of her sandwich.
“Why?” I scowled.
She withdrew the offered sandwich. “I just can’t finish it and I don’t like to throw food away, but if you don’t want it, that’s fine.”
Oh.
“You’re really not going to eat it?”
“No. First lunch is too early for me. I’m not that hungry.”
“Then I guess I’ll take it.” I tried not to seem too eager when she handed it to me, but I couldn’t hold back from finishing it in just a few bites. It was a good fucking sandwich. I didn’t even mind that there was spinach and lettuce on it.
“So why are you sitting out here?”
She shrugged. “Why shouldn’t I be?”
“I don’t know. Just didn’t expect to see you sitting by yourself.”