B0079G5GMK EBOK (12 page)

“Let go of me!”

“Whatever,” Adam snapped back and let her go. “You've been staring at me all day, so now we're even.”

Clarissa blushed. “Well, I'm not staring now, am I?” she said silently and rubbed her aching head.

Adam made her stop and took her hands. “You feel it, too, don't you?”

Clarissa stared at him. She felt nothing except the terrible ache in her head and the storm in her belly. She felt like puking again and looked for a good place to do it.

“Marie,” he
said and waited as if Clarissa knew what he was talking
about. As she stayed quiet, he
shook his head and handed her more tissues.

Clarissa
shook her head
carefully
. “What about her?”

“Honestly? You really don't feel that when you look at her or think about her?” Adam was surprised.

“Of course I feel!” Clarissa yelled, annoyed. “Marie is my sister, so yes, I feel something around her, you moron! I love her!”

Clarissa bent down and puked hard. She must be getting ill or something. This was not normal and all she wanted was to get rid of this annoying, handsome boy and go home.

“Well, good. For a moment I thought I had imagined everything,” Adam sighed, relieved.

Clarissa stared at the depths of his black eyes and
little by little, the realization spread
.

“You have no idea what
I'm talking about, do you?” he
said.

Clarissa sh
ook her head slowly. She saw Joshua loping
towards them and she wished Adam would say what he meant quickly, as there was a fight coming for sure and she really wanted to know what he had meant. Adam saw Joshua as well and spoke quickly.

“Marie's not all right.” He then
pushed her further and turned fast. Before Joshua reached them Adam yelled. “Remember what I said! And tell Sofia!”

Clarissa nodded and looked at Joshua's angry face, stunned.

“What did he want?” Joshua demanded.

Clarissa just shrugged and said nothing. Why had Adam escaped? Was he not ready to fight for her anymore? Who was he afraid of? Clarissa was confused. She stared at Adam's
retreating back
and brushed
away Joshua's annoying hand
. Joshua tried to reach
for
her hand, but she didn't want that now. So she turned her back at him and pressed her mess
ed up stomach. Had she looked more closely
, she would
have noticed Joshua's eyes leaking with rage, his lips
tightly
pressed together, and the smile
full of contempt that made his stunning face look ugly. However, she didn't look at him, but winked at Stella.

“Shall we?”

“I thought you were sick!” Joshua snapped.

Clarissa waved her hand blithely. Indeed, she felt better already. Stella went along with her little game at once and, giggling, grabbed Emilie and Caitlin's hands. She blew a kiss to Jonas and walked to the bright-red little Ford Kaa with her hips swinging.

“Oui, cherie! Time for the
beauty parlor!” Stella yelled cheerfully.

The girls packed themselves in the tiny car and Stella drove recklessly away, leaving three surprised looking men behind. Stella was the only one of them who had a driver's license. She had spent two years in Australia and was actually two years older
than the others, even though one w
ouldn't notice that. Right now, Clarissa felt that Stella's driving skills had dropped from heaven into her arms because the last thing she could
handle now was a cross
Joshua.

None of the girls said anything and Clarissa was happy to have friends like that. Stella actually
drove to the shopping mall which
had a small parlor, but none of them really wanted to go there, so they headed to the doughnut-cafe and bought a bunch of greasy chocolate doughnuts. None of them mentioned Adam and she enjoyed their frothy gabble that seemed to ease her headache. She felt almost normal and her belly was
fine, too. Strange, she thought. S
he had really felt sick at school and now, almost nothing. She hadn't even puked after eating her doughnut. Something had caused her illness at school, but she was way too tired to analyze it at the moment and that was definitely something she should think about later.

When Stella finally drove her home, Clarissa
smile
d
at her friends and thank
ed them. She
prepared herself for a deafening lecture, but no one was around. The rooms were empty and
silence
wrapped the house. She sneaked covertly into her room and slipped into bed. Satisfied, she turned off the lights and let the cool darkness fl
ush her mind and body. Even though
her mind was full of Adam, she had totally forgotten his warnings about Marie and she fell asleep, smiling.

Sofia

I heard when Clarissa came home but as I
was lying
comfortably in David's arms, I didn't want to move. I listened to David's peaceful breathing. Our house had quieted down almost completely. Somewhere
in my mind I heard Marie and Tiamhaidh talking
silently, but that was the only sound I could pick up, and I assumed that all the others from our pack wer
e sleeping already or
not home at all.

Jonas had told me how great Clarissa's school day had been and I was surprised
at how well Adam was
keep
ing his promise of leaving
Claris
sa alone. I wondered if she had
figured out why she had been so sick at school, as I knew the reason perfectly
well
. When Adam had bonded them together it really meant an unbreakable bond and I had heard from Jonas how Adam had ignored her today. Her body had felt as sick as her mind, but I wasn't going to tell her that, not now. I thought that she could protect her body better if she could learn how to protect and control her mind on her own. I knew that would not be easy, but she would learn it quicker without me
. I
f not, well, then I had to tell her.

I
thought it was a good day overall.  No fighting, though
I heard it had been close between Adam and Joshua, no bugging from Brianna and Clarissa was still alive. Tomorrow would be easier, so I figured I could
stop worrying. I
fondled David's warm chest
absentmindedly
and dug myself deeper in
to
his arms. He tightened his arms around me and sighed.

“Are you sleeping?” I asked quietly.

“Hmm,” David mumbled.

“I can't sleep.”

David didn't answer and I tried to find a better position. After a while, I was still awake.

“Sofia?”

“Yes?” I said happily. I was glad he was awake too, and that I didn't have to suffer my insomnia alone.

“I've been thinking about this whole shape shifting thing and there's one thing I don't get,” David said pensively.

I sat up and held my breath. I had no idea what was coming, but I was all ears. He turned and faced my alert eyes.

“
How did any wolf originally even try to change its shape?” He asked, confused.

“What do you mean?” I asked, on the alert. David had obviously thought this through. This was not just something that
had
popped out of his mind and I had to be careful now.

“I mean, what made that first wolf try to change? That should be impossible and yet I know that happened. I just can't figure out why?” He
was talking
more to himself than to me and didn't even wait for me to answer.

He had gotten up and was completely awake
. I was thrilled. I wasn't going to
let him off
easily as I prepared to answer. However he continued before I could get
a word out of my mouth.

“You know that I don't believe in super
natural things and shape shifting
, if that is totally supernatural. I can't understand how you can do it, I just can't. Not even when I have seen it many times with my own eyes,” He said and the silent sadness in his voi
ce made me calm down. I felt my shoulders slumping
and I tried to smile at him.

“I don't know,” I said tamely. “I've thought about it several times myself as well and the only answer I can figure out is need. I mean, if you really need something, I believe your mind will help you to do it, and after you've done it once it's just a child's play.”

I looked at him and wondered if my answer was good enough. He had a weird expression on his face as he stared at me silently. Had I said something wrong? This was so peculiar. Why did he want to know? Why now? Shouldn't this have been the first question after I had told him what I am? Finally he spoke and he sounded really stubborn.

“I can't believe you. If that's true, wouldn't it mean that I can change as well?”

“I guess so. But you don't have to change, do you? There is no need for that, right?” I asked and felt really uncomfortable.

“Yes, Sofia. I, if anyone, have the need,” David snapped sadly. “Can't you see that I'm an outsider? With you all around me, I feel so useless and weird. I should actually feel really normal, but I don't. I feel that you're the normal ones and I'm the freak. Marie is the only other human in this house and she has an extraordinary gift, Sofia. She can understand your kind and get into your minds. You and Clarissa will not age, ever. Yes, I know you can shape your face to look older and make me feel
more at ease
, but the fact is, I will die and you will live forever. Do you think it's easy for me to accept the thought of you being immortal? Especially when I know that when my heart has beat for the last time, Gunward will be standing at our door waiting for you and you, you will be running into
his arms at that moment,” he
said without once inhaling.

Obviously this had been in his mind awhile.

“I'm so sorry, honey! Oh, David, I had no idea how this must make you feel!” I interrupted his monologue and pressed myself into his arms.

The guilt flowed in me. I had been so blind. How could I not notice how he
was suffering
beside me? I should have, I thought, and I had no excuses this time. I had to admit that I had had so many other things in my mind that nothing like this could ever come to my attention. I felt awful.

“Tell me about it. So you see, I really have the need to change, but I have no idea
how to do it,” David mumbled in
my hair.

“Me neither,” I said sadly. I lifted my mouth so that he
could kiss it and suddenly I had
a brilliant idea. “But I know who we can ask! We're going to Senja next sum
mer and before you say anything -
I kno
w how much you hate the thought -
I will meet Gunward again. But we have to go.”

“Why?” David asked as doubt and jealousy crawled into his voice.

“Because the elders know the answers to your questions and because I want you to finally meet my parents. No more secrets, remember?” I said and smiled radiantly.

David relaxed and squeezed me tight. “Of course I remember,” he said and kissed me with a smile.

“Try to sleep now. I believe that everything will turn out just great.”

David mumbled something vaguely, perhaps a complaint, but I felt how
full of exhaustion
his mind
was and before I knew it
, I too, had fallen into a deep sleep.

I knew where I was the
second the dream began. Mount Breitinden loomed above the woods, steady and bold as usual. The first snow had partly covered its slopes and the mid-
day sun
was trying
forcefully to push through the haze of clouds and darkness in order to give light. However, the days were so dark at this time of the year that the sun was nothing but a red ball in the sky, and its light would not reach the woods for a long time. The polar nights were near and it wouldn't be long before you couldn't separate day from night.

Below the slopes was a black jeep, and two men were trying to pack a huge mass of luggage in
to
it.
There were four wolves running
a
round the car, playing together
and robbing stuff from
that mountain of things. I thought
they were nothing more than wolf-cubs, but I could
have
be
en
wrong. A tall, dark man was talking to two older people and when he turned to lift a glove that one of the wolves had robbed, I saw that he was talking with my parents.