Back To Me (3 page)

              “Yeah, I did. But I chose that life. I chose to let it affect me, and now Heather…”

              Luke practically did a double-take as he looked back at me, wearing a puzzled look on his face. “What about Heather?”

              “Wait! Heather as in your ex-girlfriend? The love of your life that walked out on you when you needed her the most?
That
Heather?” Lauren’s bitter tone surprised me. Even though I knew she loathed Heather for what she’d done to me, surely she wouldn’t be so callous as to expect me to throw her to the wolves.

              “Yeah, that Heather.” I sighed and rubbed my hands down my face. “But she’s in trouble now because of my past, because of my job. I have to help her. Bring her back here or somethin’. Hell if I know.” I threw my hands in the air and let out a disgruntled breath. I should’ve known that at some point all the bad shit would catch up with me. It always does.

              “What’s going on?” Luke asked, concerned.

              “Raul. The dirt bag I “
worked
” for,” I said, making quotation marks with my fingers. “He’s got it out for her, according to my old partner Blake. He paid me a visit earlier and filled me in.”

              “So what? You’re just gonna take off and go rescue her after what she did to you?” Lauren asked in disbelief. I was surprised at her callousness. It was completely out of character.

              “You don’t understand. Raul
will
kill her. No matter what she did or didn’t do, she shouldn’t have to pay for my mistakes. Raul’s pissed because I’m alive. I should’ve died that night. It sure would’ve been a helluva lot better for everybody.”

              “That’s a cowardly thing to say,” Lauren stated. “The Billy
I know
doesn’t run away.”

              She was right. I didn’t run away. At least I didn’t use to. But that’s all I’d been doing since I quit the agency….running. I’d been running from my past, from Raul, from my friends, my responsibilities.
Everything
.

              “What do you need us to do?” Lauren asked, quietly. “Whatever you need, Billy, we’re here for you.” She was still kneeling beside me as she turned her face to Luke.

              “Want me to go with you?” he asked. It was just like him to offer, but it was too dangerous and he had a family that needed him.
No one needed me.

              “Nah, man. You stay here and protect your girls. This is somethin’ I gotta do alone.”

              “Okay, but call if you need me. I can be here in fifteen,” he retorted.

              “I know.”

              Lauren finally stood, as did I. Luke shook my hand and Lauren gave me a tight squeeze around my neck and a kiss on my cheek. “We’ll be here when you get back,” she whispered.

              “Okay.”

              As they reached the front door to leave, Luke turned around and handed me a small envelope plastered with glitter. I immediately smiled.

              “I almost forgot. This is from Sam. Promised her we’d hand-deliver it. It’s an invitation to her birthday party this weekend.” Luke smiled like any proud daddy would and it made something inside me ache. I would never have that experience and I’ll admit I was jealous.

              I smiled as I took it from him. I couldn’t believe Sam was turning four already. She was becoming such a big girl and I missed her terribly. I had been gone a lot, doing more undercover assignments and trying to stay busy. With Lauren’s ordeal over, they didn’t need me hanging around all the time. They deserved every bit of peace and happiness they could get and I just didn’t fit in that world anymore.

              “I might have a guest. Alright if I bring her along?”

              Lauren smiled. “That’d be just fine. You bring Heather along so I can get to know her. Maybe between the two of us we can figure out some way to keep you in line.” She winked at me before walking away. Luke nodded his head and followed her out.

              When they were finally gone, I sat back down and looked at the purple colored envelope in my hand. I smiled and shook my head, thinking of all the trouble Sam had gone through to make this especially for me. She was one special little girl. I opened it carefully, pulling out the note card with crayon scribble. There were tiny heart stickers and smiley faces covering almost the entire thing. Tears sprang to my eyes as I pondered what the hell was wrong with me. That little dark-haired girl with blue eyes had brought me to my knees again, just like I knew she could. I stared at the card a while longer before stuffing it back into the envelope. I laid it carefully on the coffee table and sat back in the chair. I had put this off for as long as I could. I needed to make a call before it was too late.

              Pulling my phone from my pocket, I dialed the number, praying he would answer. He did so on the first ring.

              “Took you long enough. You just caught me. Had to stop for gas.” I could hear him smile on the other end of the line.
Jerk!

              “Where is she?” I didn’t need to explain and there was no need for pleasantries at this point. He’d been waiting for me.

              “You never were one for beating around the bush, were you? She’s at Tommy’s. She works tonight ‘til one, if you can make it,” Blake said.

              “
She works there?
” I asked in disbelief. Up until now I just assumed she
visited
the less than stellar establishment.

              “Yeah,” he answered, sounding surprised. “Of course she works there. Thought you understood that.”

              “Nah, man, I didn’t. So she…..”

              “You’re an ass, Billy. You know Heather isn’t like that. She’s just a waitress,” he explained.

              I breathed a sigh of relief and thanked him before disconnecting the call. At least now I had some idea what I was walking into. I’d lose my shit if I walked in and saw her dancing on the stage, taking her clothes off for every scumbag that walked through the door. I knew she wasn’t like that
before
, but a person can change a lot in six years. I knew that better than anyone. I took another deep breath before looking down at the phone again. I had seven hours to get there. It would be pushing it, but I could make it.

              I gathered a few things, shoving them roughly in my duffle bag. I grabbed my keys, wallet, and phone before strapping on my holster. I wasn’t with the department anymore, but I didn’t go anywhere without it. Especially since I might run into Raul, it only made sense to take it along.

5

Heather

              The bar was hopping tonight, and two of the waitresses had called in sick. My crappy night was only just beginning. Tracy and I were the one’s manning the main floor while Sara took the private rooms and the upstairs lounge. It was a madhouse.

              “Johnny, I need three more for table seven,” I called out as I sashayed my way through the crowd.

              “Coming right up, sweet cakes!” He meant no harm by the nickname and it never bothered me that, for whatever reason, he bestowed that honor upon me and me alone.

              “Thought I told you to hang with the girls tonight,” Tommy said, menacingly as he grabbed my upper arm so tightly that it was sure to leave a bruise. I hadn’t even noticed him there.

              “We’re shorthanded,” I replied with a hint of sarcasm. “Two of
your women
called in sick!” I hadn’t meant for it to sound as snarky as it did and I was sure he’d think of some way for me to pay later. Tommy didn’t take lip from anyone, especially not from his
girls
.

              “Tomorrow then,” he said, smugly. “I’ll collect sooner or later. I always do, doll. You’d do well to remember that.” He leaned against me, his body pushing me further into the wood of the bar until the edge was pressing uncomfortably in my back. His breath reeked of alcohol and pot and one look in his eyes left no doubt that he was high. My only choice was to agree with him. Anything else and it wouldn’t fare well.              

              “Of course, Tommy.” I stood firm, shaking his hand loose from my arm. “Whatever you say,
sir
.” He got a high just from my choice of words, but it wasn’t a show of respect. Regardless of how I felt, he was still my boss. I just needed to get through this night and then it’d all be over.

              I was shaken and Tracy must have noticed. She made her way over to me while throwing a maddening look in Tommy’s direction. “Take a break, sweetie. I’ll cover you for a few.” She was one of the sweetest women you’d ever meet and it was a shame she was stuck working in a dump like this. If anyone deserved better it was Tracy. She was a single mother of twin boys and a teenage daughter, who by the way was very close to dancing on the stage herself. I swear Tracy was gonna have trouble if she didn’t get a handle on that girl, but at fifteen it was probably already too late.

              “I’m okay, Trace. Maybe later,” I forced a smile and she patted my back.

              “Take shit from no one,” she reminded me. “No. One.”

              I nodded my head and tried to shake the horrible feeling that was settling in the pit of my stomach. Something about the whole night felt off, as if I was being watched, but I couldn’t afford to let it affect me. I sighed and turned, grabbing my tray and the drinks that Johnny had placed on top.

              “Here ya go, boys,” I said, cheerfully as I passed around their drinks.

              “What else ya got for me, sugar?” The old man winked and tried to sneak his hand up my skirt, unsuccessfully. I batted his hand and moved away, somehow managing to maintain a smile. All I wanted to do was deck him.

              “Now you know the rules, boys. No touching.” Rules, schmules. It doesn’t make a damn difference to any of them. They thought we were all free for the taking and it was our job to encourage it. The more they drank the more money that went into Tommy’s pocket.

              “Just one little touch, kitten. I won’t bite,” one of the other men said. He gave me a sickening grin, revealing a few missing teeth, causing me to pause and cringe inwardly.

              “No, but I will,” I replied as sweetly as I could manage. It was taking all I had to not smash the tray over his head, too. I walked away quickly, knowing I had just blown any chance for a tip.

              I hadn’t made much tonight, but with several hours left to go, I was hopeful I could make up for it by the end of my shift. On my way back to the bar, I noticed a man sitting off to the side. It was one of Tracy’s tables, but she was swamped. I sighed to myself and made my way over. At least it was just one customer. That should make the job easier.

              “What can I get for you?” I asked politely while I waited.

              The mysterious man sat in the shadows, and though I was barely able see his face I recognized his cologne the second I approached. It reeked of money and power. I stumbled backwards, suddenly afraid of being so close to him.

              “Why,
Senorita
. How nice of you to come over and say hello.” His perfectly white teeth shined brightly in the glow of the strobe lights as his tongue snaked out to rake over his full lips. Chill bumps immediately broke out over my skin, but not in a good way. I knew this man was trouble and I would have
never
made my way over had I known it was
him.
All of my senses were on high alert as I tried desperately to regain my voice.

              “I was just coming to see if you needed anything to drink.”
Oh hell, please say no!

             
“Scotch on the rocks, my dear. And make it a double.” He took my hand in his, leaning forward ever so slightly to press his mouth to my fingertips. “Such lovely hands. I bet they feel as good as they taste.”

              I threw up in my mouth, but quickly recovered.
Take shit from no one.
I withdrew my hand from his grip, making a show of wiping his slobber onto my skirt. His touch repulsed me as meaningless words flew from his mouth like the silver-tongued devil I knew him to be.

              “I’ll be right back with your drink.” I turned quickly and sprinted away, praying that Tracy might be willing to wait on him after all. I would take
all
of her other tables if she would handle just this one. I knew he frequented the bar and that he normally stayed until the doors were locked. I also knew that with over two hours left, I couldn’t tolerate dealing with him for that long.

              “I need a double on the rocks,” I said to Johnny. I moved closer to him, trying to make a show of affection, though I felt none of it. He was more like a brother to me and it’d never crossed my mind to think of him as anything more. However, if I could convince Casanova over there that we were a couple, maybe he’d back off. It was doubtful, but I was desperate and willing to try anything.

              “What’s gotten into you?” Johnny asked, giving me a puzzled look. He guessed before I could answer. “Someone spooked you, didn’t they?”

              “Yeah,” I whispered. “Mr. Tall-Dark-and-Creepy over there,” I pointed discreetly over my shoulder. “Keeps calling me
senorita
and kissing my hand, and all that crap. He was talking to Tommy earlier when I went into the office.”

              Johnny peered over me, but I knew he couldn’t see the man. It was too dark and I imagined that’s just the way he wanted it. No one could identify him as the creep who murdered me if they couldn’t see his face. Suddenly closing up and walking to the parking lot by myself didn’t seem so appealing.

              “Be careful. You know the rules. If he gets out of hand, you let me know.” Johnny was a big guy and no doubt could hold his own, but something told me Rico Suave was used to getting what he wanted regardless, and big men like Johnny didn’t scare him one bit.

              “Will do,” I said. “Thanks, Johnny, for looking out for me.” I gave him a friendly wink and took the drink from his hand.

              “I’ll be watching,” he called from behind me. I knew the man couldn’t hear him with the music blaring. I didn’t want Johnny getting tangled up with this guy, whoever the hell he was. Savannah was on-stage, twirling herself
and
her bits around, and I doubt anyone was paying any attention to me anyhow.

              “Here you go, sir.” I wanted to throw the amber liquid in his face, but settled for sitting it on the table, a little harder than was necessary. I tried to scurry away, but I was too slow.

              “Where are you going,
senorita
? I thought we might chat for a bit.” Was he crazy? Delusional? This man actually thought I wanted the pleasure of his company. Please!

              “I’m really busy tonight, but thanks for the offer.” I smiled politely before turning to leave.

              “Perhaps another time then?” he called after me. It wasn’t a request, or a question and I recalled what Tommy said earlier. My mind was starting to piece things together, but I shook it off once again. It couldn’t be. It just couldn’t.

              I ignored the man and went about my night, playing the ditzy, sleazy woman the men expected me to be. “Think this is yours, sweetie.” Tracy handed me a stack of folded bills, inciting me to look at her as if she had two heads. “What? I found it on your table.”

              “What table?” I asked.

              “The one over there,” she pointed to where the creep had been. I hadn’t noticed him leaving which made me even more nervous. He was still here, hiding somewhere I couldn’t see, but I
felt
him.

              I carefully unfolded the wad of money and counted.
He left me a tip of five hundred dollars?
What?
Why?
I knew why. It was my down payment. He thought I could be bought and this could be just one of the many payoffs. Well, he could just take his five hundred dollars and shove it up his ass! I was
not
for sale.

              “Tracy, you take this. I want you to have it.” I folded the money back together and shoved it in her pocket. “You need this more than I do and you’ve waited more tables tonight.”

              “Oh, no,” she argued, shaking her head. “I can’t take this.” She tried to give it back, but I wouldn’t have it.

              “Please, Tracy,” I insisted. “Take the money, okay? Use it to buy the kids school stuff or something.” I shrugged my shoulders, wishing someone had been that nice to my mom when I was a kid. No one had
ever
offered to help us and I ended up going to school in clothes that didn’t fit. I got made fun of every day, too, for always being out of style. I didn’t want her kids to experience the same.

              Tracy set her tray on top of the bar and lunged at me, wrapping her arms around me tightly. “No one has
ever
done something so generous for me.
No one
,” she whispered. I embraced her in return, feeling like I had done something right and worthwhile. That I had done something
good.

              “You deserve it, Trace, and so do your kids.”

              She sniffled and dried her tears before walking back into the madhouse of horny men. I watched her go, sad that this would be the last time I would ever see her. My only real friend.

              “That’s a real nice thing you did, sweet cakes. Real nice.” Johnny was standing behind the bar, smiling at me as if I’d just performed a miracle. I wasn’t deserving of his compliments, or anyone else’s for that matter, so I waved it off and went back to cleaning my tables.

              I checked my watch and noticed it was nearing midnight. Just one more hour and I’d be rid of this shithole. Part of me couldn’t wait, but the other part of me worried about what I would do next. It’s not like I had any marketable skills; anything of worth to offer someone. Sure I could flip burgers, but it wouldn’t pay enough and I was barely scraping by as it was. I tried to brush it off and focus on the task at hand. If Tommy saw me slacking it would only add to my mounting list of problems.

              I wiped the tables and situated the chairs around them in an orderly fashion. I helped Johnny clean the glasses and I took the trash to the back door. All of that together only took about thirty minutes, and I had to find other things to occupy my time. Tracy only had two tables left and Sara had already cashed out and was leaving to go home. Lucky girl. She always got the upstairs lounge which was reserved for bachelor parties and rich business men from out of town. That’s where the real money was, but I knew Tommy would never let me manage it. Sara was his girl, literally, though she didn’t seem to mind that he stepped out on her. Regularly and in her face, mind you. Oh well, if she could live with it who was I to dissuade her?

              I rested my elbows on the bar while facing the stage. One of the new girls was nervously finishing up her routine. She obviously was not coordinated or sexy, judging by the lack of enthusiasm from the men. The ‘pros’, as I liked to call them, don’t care one way or another. They know they’re good at what they do and they get paid well to do it. They don’t like other women stepping in on their territory. I imagined this new girl was having a hard time being accepted. She was very pretty, but in a haunting sort of way. You could tell she kept herself hidden, metaphorically speaking of course, and that she had a lot of secrets. She watched me intently as she continued to move awkwardly across the stage. Suddenly, her eyes widened in panic and the energy in the room changed, like an artic front moving in, causing a jolt to my body.

              “Didn’t you like my tip, púta?”