Beauty in Disguise (15 page)

“You needed to hurt me because of your anger, and I have allowed it. But this time you almost hurt them.” He could see her shaking in her anger.

She balled her fists at her sides. “I deserve everything and more that you want to do to me.” He tried to interrupt her, but she held up her hand to silence him. “This is as close to a family as I have right now, and I will not let you hurt them. In your effort to demean me, you instilled a fear in them that was a sham. Sir John could have sent word to all of the local families warning them to be on their guard. I will not have it. Do you understand?”

“Yes, yes, I do, Kathryn.” He moved a little nearer. “I apologize. You are right. I had no business dragging them into our quarrel. I am sorry.”

She stared into his eyes, and if looks could kill, he would be laid out on the beautiful Aubusson carpet. He tried to convey real remorse, but she stopped him again.

“Very well, my lord. I will take you at your word.” With that, she put on her glasses and strode past him, slamming the door behind her.

Chapter Ten

T
he missive he received had been minor in nature, but he used it as an excuse to leave the manor, anyway. He wanted to see Kathryn’s father.

She was adamant he would never forgive her, and he found himself needing to be reminded why he should not do the same. The cutting remarks had never been gratifying, and the anger he had experienced while in London had not been sustained by the torture he inflicted on her.

It was time he sought the full truth, and her father was the only other person who knew it.

Dalton arrived at Montgomery Hall as dusk fell over the countryside. His thoughts had all been of Kathryn. He was confused, angry and heartsore.

When she had berated him the evening before, he was sincere in his apologies. He was a gentleman, by Jove, and he had put the whole family in a taking just to get back at her. He thought he had sunk very low indeed.

He realized her father might actually be the only other person who would understand what he was going through. He, too, would have felt mortally wounded and changed forever by the route she had chosen to take.

The unwanted conviction reared its ugly head once again. Should an action taken at seventeen years of age by a very green girl be so harshly judged? It did not diminish his pain, but it made him second-guess his plan of retribution.

He had decided that he would not carry his hurt and anger into the meeting with her father, but an unexpected stop when one of his leaders threw a shoe, and a crowded inn that took almost an hour to get a change of horses, frustrated him beyond measure.

Therefore, when the butler tried to turn him away, stating that his master was not at home to callers, his promise flew out the window.

He handed the butler his card with the corner turned down, indicating he was present and waiting to see the marquis. “Do you plan to leave me on the doorstep like some tradesman, or may I come in and wait while you deliver my message to your master?” It was said with gritted teeth and a tic in his jaw, leaving the butler in no doubt as to his intent.

Donaldson had been employed at Montgomery Hall for more than thirty years. He was not cowed. “Lord Dalton, you may come in and you may wait while your card is given to His Lordship. However, the outcome will be the same.” He was apparently allowed much freedom due to his tenure, but he had caught Lord Dalton on a bad day. “I will wait here until I see your master, so the sooner you get the message to him, the sooner you may go about your business.”

What was wrong with him? His anger seemed to permeate his soul. He was never rude to servants, or of a demanding nature. Was he allowing the bitterness his mother talked to him about to seep into every area of his life now that Kathryn was back in it?
Lord, forgive my actions and my attitude. I have allowed circumstances to tempt me into rudeness. Please help me in the meeting with the marquis.

He turned when he heard the door to the drawing room open, but it was neither Kathryn’s father nor the butler.

“Lord Dalton.” The man bowed low. “I am Hendrick, His Lordship’s valet.” He cleared his throat. “I shall take you to the master directly—however, I must inform you that he has been quite ill. We fear for his recovery, as he is not strong. The doctors have advised him against seeing visitors, but when he saw your card, he would not be gainsaid.” He walked back to the door, indicating that Lord Dalton should precede him into the hallway.

“You must prepare yourself, my lord. He has been sick for some time and is not as...robust as you may remember him.” As they began their ascent to the upper floors, the valet stopped and faced him. “He is very weak, my lord, and must not be upset. I tell you now that I will take it upon myself to remove you should I deem it necessary.”

Dalton was completely taken aback. He had not known what to expect, but this had never occurred to him. “I understand, Hendrick, and I appreciate your dedication to your master.”

He was ushered into a massive bedchamber with the curtains drawn and many candles already lit. He looked toward the bed and saw two male servants settling a frail man into a sitting position against a mountain of pillows. All harshness and anger left him, and he waited patiently for the marquis’s attention. When the servants finally moved away, the man in the bed was out of breath and deathly pale. God’s truth, he
was
a shell of the man he remembered.

“My boy, I am sorry...” he said, drawing a ragged breath. “Sorry for making you wait so long. I...do not get many...visitors these days.”

“My lord, it is I who am sorry. I came here with an angry heart, and I bullied my way into disrupting your peace. I did not know you were unwell. I apologize, sir.” He was sincerely sorry; it showed clearly on his face.

“Nonsense! My servants have been threatening you, have they?” He gave a weak smile. “They are so loyal,” he said, still a little out of breath, “that they watch me like a hawk. I got to throw my weight around today. It feels good.” He lay back against the pillows and closed his eyes, but with the smile still on his face.

Dalton did not know what to do. Had they not gotten him into a sitting position, he would have begged the man’s pardon and retreated. But Kathryn’s father had clearly been intent on seeing him, as well, despite his illness.

“Pull one of those chairs up close to me, son. Have no fear—I am not contagious.”

“My lord,” Dalton said as he brought a chair from the fireplace, “may I ask what your doctors
have
diagnosed?”

“I am fed up with the lot of them, if you want the truth with no bark on it. They say I had the influenza first and that it moved into my lungs. They tell me it has turned into pneumonia, and frankly, they are surprised I still live.” He suddenly began to cough, and Hendrick ran for a glass of water while Dalton instinctively went to support his head as he drank.

“My lord, it is time for your next draft.”

“No, no, go away. You may administer it when Lord Dalton has settled in for the night. I wish to have a clear head at the moment.”

As the valet left the room, Dalton’s heart hurt him. This visit was years too late, and this man was all alone except for his loyal servants. “My lord, perhaps...”

“Call me Edward, please. And there is no point in putting this off until I am better. I...” He fought for some air. “I wish to speak to you. I
need
to speak to you.” He closed his eyes after calming his cough, but he opened them again and looked at him piercingly. “Tell me you have found her. Please tell me you know where she is.”

“I beg your pardon? Can it be that you do not? I thought— I was under the impression you had no wish to know where she was.”

He laid his head back, though he still watched him. His voice was low. “I do not know. She would be with me if I did.”

Dalton ran his hands through his hair. He had come here to share disappointment and empathy about Kathryn. He had come to ask him why he had not had the decency to let him know the truth about her so long ago. He had not told him because he had not known.

“Yes sir, I know where she is.”

The man’s eyes closed again, and Dalton saw his entire body relax. “Tell me everything.”

“I am afraid that is what I wished of you.”

“I do not understand. You have found her, you have spoken with her. Did she not tell you what happened? What a complete fool I was? Where has she been? Is she well? Would she... Do you think she could ever be convinced to see me again?”

“Sir, perhaps you had better rest while I speak. I fear there are parts that may be difficult for you if you have had no conversation with her since she eloped.”

“I have had no communication with
her,
but when I discovered Salford was back in London, you may be sure I had a serious discussion with him.” He leaned his head back again. “He said she refused to marry him. He said
she
used
him
to meet a...lover in Scotland. I did not believe it of her, ever! But I had men looking for her as soon as the next morning. None could trace her.” The back of his thin, translucent hand came up to cover his eyes. “Lord Salford will not show his face in England again if he knows what is good for him.”

“I have discovered he is now deceased, my lord.”

“I am glad to hear it, though I will have to confess that to God. I was such a fool. I wrote her that she was no longer my daughter. And she believed me. I have lived with that for all these years, but I told God He could do with me what He would, as long as He kept her safe. I hope that is why I am sick, so she may be well.”

“I will tell you the circumstances under which we met, and what she has told me of her life. I came to you angry, wanting to know the reason you had not told me why she left London with no one the wiser. I can see now that all three of us have been at cross purposes.”

Dalton was worried about the man so ill before him. Should he tell him everything? Should he keep some things between Kathryn and himself? He decided he would tell him all of it, since he would want nothing less if it were him. But he would lessen the extremity of some things.

As he finished his tale with the recounting of their meeting, he would have suspected the man had drifted off to sleep except for the tears rolling out of his closed eyes.

Dalton confessed, “I was rude and appalled and hurt to the core of my heart. But I still could not let it rest. Or perhaps God would not let me leave it that way. Now that He has forgiven me my anger, I believe it is I who was the fool.” He gave a bitter laugh as he quoted the verse his mother told him to lean on in this situation:
“And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another...”

“You still love her, too.” The older man believed it; he did not ask it.

The answer was not so clear to him. “I do not know, sir. We have been apart a long time, and we have both matured a great deal. Does that new maturity lend itself to an old love? I am afraid I have not given it even half a chance.”

The two sat in silence for a moment. Her father saw all the things he loved about her, but he had been too angry to trust his feelings. Was it too late to make up for the lost nine years?

“Will you bring her to see me?”

The person he had loved so long ago was not the same person now. Indeed,
he
was not the same person now. But he knew fundamentally, she had not changed. She was more mature, yes, but she was also more nurturing, more protective, and willing to fight for those she loved. It was all new to him.

He asked again, “Will you bring her to see me?”

“I will need to be sure she will believe
me
first, but then I will bring her. It may take me a little time, but if it is within my power, I will bring her.”

“Thank you, my boy, but time is the one thing I may not have.”

Dalton determined he would expedite a reunion between Kathryn and her father if he had to tie her up to do it. In the meantime, there was much he had to do.

That night, in a guest chamber of Montgomery Hall, Dalton lay awake a long time into the night. He thought back to the meeting between him and Kathryn’s father when he had asked for her hand. He remembered it as if it were yesterday.

“Have a seat, son, welcome.” The Marquis sat behind the desk. They were in the library in the house in Town.

Dalton was nervous. He had little to recommend him as the younger son of an earl.

“Sir, I have come to ask you...to get your permission...”

“To marry my daughter?”

“Yes, sir.”

Her father got up and came around his desk to sit in the chair next to his. “My boy, there is no need to keep you on pins and needles. I know your parents, and I know you follow God in all things. Kathryn has mentioned to me that you talk of entering the War Office as a profession. I see no impediments, and I am thankful God has brought such a man into her life.”

“Thank you, sir. That is high praise indeed, coming from a man I respect as much as you.”

“Before we call on the lawyers to make the marriage settlements, I still have one question.”

“You do not need to say it, sir. I know she is very young.”

“That is it, my boy. She has had to grow up quicker than most because of the death of her mother. But her experience with men is only what she has gained in the last two months. I believe she loves you. I have no fear on that score.”

“My lord, I have talked this over with my parents, and we all share the same concern. May I propose that we say nothing to Lady Kathryn at this time? Perhaps, if she still feels the same about me at the end of the Season, I will ask her to marry me?”

“Are you willing to risk that, my boy? I would never ask it of you.”

“As I said, I have thought this through. I hope that your approval will allow me as much time with her as I need for her to get to know me fully. If she finds someone she prefers over me, I should like to know it sooner rather than later.”