Because I Love You (6 page)

Considering her track record, Leah didn't think that kind of love would ever happen to her. Even though she believed, without any doubt, that Tristan was a good and honorable man, she would never trust her heart with anyone.

That simple decision protected her personally and professionally. Never again would she mix business with pleasure.

The firm she was consulting for was in an old house that had been converted to offices in Northport. It was a gorgeous October day, and she'd been thinking about grabbing a deli sandwich and going to the waterfront park to have her lunch. But Ginger was an old friend, and reconnecting with people, even though the talk would be focused on the office, wasn't a bad idea. She'd meet her colleague at the casual bistro, pick at a salad when she really wanted a messy burger, and talk shop. Harmless.

Everything about her life had been focused on her career. When she first graduated from law school, she worked seventy-hour weeks just like every other associate, and she loved it. The law made sense, and when it was coupled with money, regulations, and high stakes, Leah was in heaven.

If she were still with her old firm, she would have been close to making partner by now. Of course, having an affair with her boss—her big secret—a man she trusted with her career and her heart and who turned out to be engaged, was not her best move. Of course, Doug should have mentioned he was going to be married to the senior partner's daughter before he seduced her in his office.

The guy was a lying cheat, and to cover his own ass, he'd painted Leah as a predator. Claiming she had made the first
move—she hadn't. Saying she knew he was engaged—she didn't.

The final nail in her coffin came when he accused her of trying to blackmail him. Which was a total lie, but no one believed the spoiled rich girl who always got what she wanted.

They believed the man. Doug was one of those all-American good guys. Solidly middle-class, he'd worked his way through college and law school. Everyone loved him; he was a hometown hero. A star athlete. The boy whom parents wanted their daughters to marry. Unfortunately, under all the backslapping bluster, he was a misogynistic asshole of the highest order. But, like everyone else, Leah fell for him, and almost wrecked her career in the process. Now she was back on track and ready to move up.

She'd been lucky to find a position with Harris and Blanchard, a firm that had a wonderful reputation in dealing with client arbitration, asset recovery, and investment protection. All the principals were happy with her work, and while some of the assignments weren't ideal, they were highly visible. The promise of a non-equity partnership had been dangled more than a few times over the past six months, and with her annual review just a month away, Leah had high hopes that her past mistake would finally be nothing but a bad memory.

Just as she grabbed her purse and her phone, a text came in. Tristan.

Hi.

She smiled. Poor guy was probably bored to death.
Hey, what have you been up to?

Absolutely nothing. On one hand it's driving me crazy. On the other, I had no idea how addictive your morning television could be.

I wouldn't know. I don't think I've watched TV in five years.

Me either, which is why this is so fascinating. Did you know lemon water eliminates bloat?

Leah laughed out loud. For real.
I did know that, yes.

Well I didn't. I also didn't know I could use coconut oil for stretch marks.

You don't have stretch marks.
She'd seen him naked, there was nothing except muscles, smooth skin, and patches of hair where a man was supposed to have hair.

Glad you noticed.

She'd noticed.

I'm on my way to lunch. Do you need me to pick anything up for you?

No. I'm fine. Your mum and sister-in-law were by a little while ago. Things are better with you two, correct? She seems incredibly nice.

Yup. Jenna was that. Nice.
She is. I've managed to wrangle forgiveness from her.

I'm glad that's working out.
She could hear him say it. In her head. Whispering in her ear. God, the man was inside her.

I'm going to go. I'll call you before I leave work. Okay?

Talk to you later.

The entire exchange was only a few sentences, but hearing from him made her feel lighter, happier. Truth be told, those texts pretty much made her day.

And that was a problem.

His light was still on. Leah didn't know if she should pop over and maybe bring him some dessert. After their one-night stand, they'd adjusted to the change in their relationship, having long talks, sometimes over drinks, sometimes sharing a meal. It was easy and comfortable, and their deepening friendship made him that much more important to her. She kind of felt like she was entitled to see him, because she knew him better than the rest of the family, but at the same time, she wasn't sure what she should do. What did all of this mean? On one hand she'd been very firm that they could only be friends. On the other hand she had no idea where she stood.

She'd always wanted so much for herself, professionally and personally, it made her cringe a little that her love life was reduced to memories and regrets. If she didn't get a handle on her feelings for Tris, she'd make a mess of that, too.

By the time she'd gotten home from work, he'd already eaten dinner. Mum invited him to the house to eat with her and Da, and by that point he was hungry and craving company so he'd happily accepted. Leah walked in while they were having coffee in the living room.

Hearing all the accents and brogues as she made her way to the living room brought back a lot of memories. Sally always joined her parents for coffee and tea after dinner, so when Leah entered the room, her father and Sally were both talking at once, but this time they weren't arguing. The two of them were set up against Tris, who, as a representative of the Empire, was expected to defend the position of every British monarch back to Henry II. The first thing she heard upon walking in was Sally railing about the Irish Rebellion of 1798 and Da waxing poetic about the clans who were massacred at Culloden Field.

Mum was watching and laughing quietly, and Tris was feigning disinterest as they went on, finally muttering something about them being
sore losers
. That of course set up another assault.

It was interesting to watch Sally and Da on the same team. The two of them bickered like siblings most of the time, but now they'd found a common foe. Based on the gleam in Tristan's eyes, he was thoroughly enjoying his new role.

As soon as Sally saw she was home, she hustled Leah to the gleaming country kitchen to be fed, and before she knew it Da was escorting Tris back to the cottage so he could get some rest. He nodded to her as he passed by with her father, and from her perch on the stool at the marble island, she watched the slow progress up the path.

Poor Tris. Watching him move was one of the most attractive things about him. He was naturally athletic. His long, muscled arms and legs, his broad shoulders and well-defined torso, worked together to produce a grace and power in everything he did. She'd seen him play polo with a fluidity that rivaled her brother, who was an internationally ranked horseman.

Now, the poor guy was shuffling like he was a hundred years old. The way he looked walking next to her father was painful.

“I like that one, missy,” Sally said, while she puttered around the kitchen. “You could do worse.”

“He's a doll, but we're just friends.” Good friends, but still just friends. Maybe if she said it enough she'd believe it.

“Damn fools the two of you are. You can't see, plain as day, that you've found your match.”

“Sally, you don't know that. There are so many variables to finding that perfect person, and I do believe you can have a good life and not be married. I mean, you're not married and you have a job you love managing our crazy asses, you travel, have wonderful friends . . .”

Sally stopped wiping the counter, a habit she developed when she chatted with people in her kitchen, and stopping usually meant she was going to tell you exactly what she thought. Leah braced herself, but Sally softened.

“Leah, darlin', you're right about all those things. I do love my work here, and more, I love being part of this family. But don't think for one second I don't regret not having a family of my own, children of my own. I put off being with a man who could have made me very happy because I thought there would always be time. I went off on adventures, worked, took jobs cooking in hotels and on cruise ships thinking when I was ready to settle down, I could go back to my village and Michael would be there. Well, he wasn't.”

“Oh, Sally. I didn't know that. What happened?”

The old woman shrugged. “I was off on one of my jaunts and he married someone else. Once I thought about it, I couldn't blame him. I never let him know what I actually wanted down the road. I took for granted that he'd wait for me. I was wrong.”

“That's so sad.”

“Water under the bridge,” Sally said solemnly. “Don't make the same mistake I did.”

“But I don't know if I want those things. I don't trust myself enough not to screw it up, you know? On top of all that, why would anyone want to put up with me for the long haul—I'm not exactly easy.”

Sally reached across the counter and took Leah's face in both her hands. “There isn't a man alive who wouldn't lay down and die for the likes of you, Leah Siobhan. But you have to be brave enough to take the chance, take a risk on something, before the good comes to your life. It's about faith.” Sally stepped back and placed the counter rag on a hook in one of the cabinets. “Don't ask yourself what you want. I know what you want and so do you. You have to ask yourself if you have the nerve to try.”

An hour later, after changing into her pajamas, Leah was back in the kitchen, nursing a cup of tea and staring at the lights in the cottage, replaying the conversation with Sally over and over. Still not knowing what she wanted, Leah acknowledged that Tristan was important to her, and each bit of time they spent together affirmed what she knew: that he was a good man. He made her laugh. She liked talking with him more than pretty much anyone, and she liked who she was when she was around him.

Confusion didn't even begin to explain what she was feeling. Of course, she was worried about him—his injuries were nothing to trifle with. It would be best if she just stayed here and let him rest, but she wanted to be with him. It felt like he needed her.

Never in her life had she felt so torn. There was no clear-cut answer. “Aw, what the hell,” she growled. “He could probably use the company. Let's see what happens.”

Putting her tea on the countertop, she pulled open the door and started the walk up the path to the guest cottage, about fifty yards from the house.

The night was cool, but not cold, so the hoodie Leah was wearing was perfect for the weather. The motion-sensitive lights flicked on as she moved between the two houses, illuminating the red, white, and yellow mums that lined the garden path.

As she passed the large front window, he caught sight of her from where he was sitting in the living room. Leah threw him a little wave, and Tristan struggled to his feet and smiled—a huge, gorgeous smile that would stop traffic.

It certainly stopped her heart.

Inside, Leah felt everything spark and come to life. Sally was right. This was scary as hell. It was also exhilarating, exciting, and it made her feel more alive than she had in years. But it was better. Tris made it so much better.

*  *  *

He didn't even give her a chance to knock. Once he saw Leah coming up to the cottage, Tris's mind could only think of one thing: hauling her into his arms and kissing her senseless. He didn't care if it would hurt, he didn't care if he was stiff, he didn't care if they were just friends. He wanted her close. No woman had ever caused such a reaction, had ever made him feel the depth of emotion he was starting to feel for her. It was a relentless ache in his belly, a warmth, a need, that could hit him at any time. The mention of her name made him think about possibilities. Leah and the future went hand in hand.

He understood that work made her late for dinner, he chronically worked late, but it didn't mean he hadn't been disappointed. When she walked in during coffee, he was sure her parents could see that he wanted her. Something about the way she smiled, the look in her eyes, the ease of her body made him realize Leah was someone he would never tire of seeing. And his dick was certainly happy she was home. Injured or not, the response to her was automatic. Just the sight of the woman made him remember all the places she liked to be touched.

Opening the door of the cottage, Tristan grabbed her hand and pulled her inside. She was pressed against him, which was certainly at odds with their decision to keep things platonic, but he focused on the fact that there was no pain. If there was, he wasn't feeling it. Leah's fingers gently stroked his jaw and a tiny grin lit up her freckled face.

“How are you feeling?” she asked.

“Better now that you're here. Your mother is lovely, but she's been hovering.”

“She's worried about you. I know you're going to be fine, and so does she, but . . . I don't know if Nate told you about my older brother, Will?”

“Your older brother? No, he hasn't.”

Leah drew a deep breath. Saying this was never easy. “Will. Older than me by five years. He was killed in a riding
accident when he was seventeen. It devastated all of us. She's going to hover.”

“Good Lord, I had no idea. That must've been awful. I can't imagine.”

“We've never really recovered. Nate had the worst of it. He and Will were very close. I don't know how my parents managed. Amy and I were numb.”

He led her to the large sofa, which dominated the living space.

“I guess I'll let your mum hover over me, then. If it makes her feel better.”

“Thank you. She's more fragile than I ever remember her being. You're giving her something to fuss over.”

“And you? Are you here to fuss over me, too?”

“I am if that's what you want. Otherwise, I just thought I'd keep you company. Watch the Mets game, maybe? It's the playoffs.”

His heart skipped a beat when she smiled. She really was lovely. “No fussing needed, but the company is very much appreciated.”

“Good. I'll make some popcorn and grab some drinks. Do you want to watch here or in the bedroom?”

Tris hesitated. He really liked the idea of getting into that nice big bed and stretching out. But could he handle having Leah in there with him?

If he was honest with himself, as much as being with her was appealing, he was in no condition to do anything, just friends or not. “Bed sounds good. I can ice my ribs if I'm lying down.”

“You go get settled and I'll be there in a minute.”

*  *  *

Coming up to the cottage was the right thing to do. Leah liked helping Tris; she liked spending time with him. It kept her mind off all the other things swirling between them. And there was a lot of stuff out there, a lot of feelings and electricity and chemistry. The two of them were on a collision course unless they could reset their relationship and set it safely in the friend zone. Leah was not a clueless woman, and she had no delusions about this man. He had the potential to destroy her in ways she'd never known, which was why they could never get involved.

Grabbing two bottles of water from the fridge, she put the popcorn in the bowl, and managed to grab an ice pack with two free fingers. Fortunately, it wasn't a long way to the bedroom, and she took a second to admire the very handsome man who was sitting against a pile of propped-up pillows, flipping channels with the remote.

“There it is.” He looked up at her and smiled. “Found the game.”

“Great. Here's your ice, and your water.”

“Bah. No beer?”

Leah eased herself onto the bed, sitting cross-legged. “Are you nuts? With the medication you're on there will be no alcohol.”

“Just one?”

“No, drink your water.”

“Killjoy,” he muttered.

“Ok, shush. Kevin's up at bat. He's been having an amazing year.”

“I've met him a few times. Great chap. I love watching Harper turn into a lovesick girl when he's around.”

“Right? It's adorable. Him too, though. He adores her.” She picked at the popcorn. “I love happy endings. It's nice to know there are men who just love their women. No games. No bullshit.”

“I'm sure there are more than you think.”

“Then I'd like to find the island where they're hidden because I've had no luck.”

Tristan laughed, wincing and grabbing his ribs. “Fuck me,” he growled. “These ribs are going to be the end of me.”

“You're being a little dramatic, don't you think?”

“My brother said the same thing today.” Tristan shook his head. “I told you, I think. He's a Royal Marine, has been shot twice while deployed. Told me to suck it up.”

“Oh,” Leah said. “Sounds like he might be the only one who could get away with that.”

Tris grimaced. “He said I should stop acting like a pansy.”

The temptation to laugh was so strong, but she just couldn't do it to him. He
was
being a bit of a pansy, but she had no objection to him wallowing a little. Pain was pain.

“Tell me about your family,” she said. “I want to know everything.” Without thinking, Leah moved toward Tris and rested her head on his shoulder.

“Let's see. I know I've told you some of this. My brothers Nick and Geoff are Royal Marines. Officers. Both have been in hot zones in different parts of the world. Nick will be in New York next week, so you'll get to meet him. Then there's me. I'm dead in the middle. My brother Nigel is a researcher at Cambridge. He's a neuroscientist, and my parents were ridiculously proud of some of the groundbreaking work he's done. Finally, my sister is a preservationist at the British Museum. She's an expert in textiles.”

“Wow. All so accomplished. Your parents must be proud.”

“My father passed a few years back. Cancer. It could have been treated, but he ignored it. The man was the absentminded professor. By the time he was diagnosed, he only had a few weeks left. It was hard on my mum. On all of us. He was a kind, kind man.”