Blood & Thunder (26 page)

“No. When Dex cares about something, he puts his whole heart and soul into it. He’s the best guy I know, and not because he’s my brother. He’ll never let you down, never betray you. But he’s not so good at doing the same for himself. He’ll let you keep hurting him, Sloane, and he deserves better than that.”

Sloane nodded. “You’re right, he does.”

“May I speak freely?”

“Always.”

Cael rounded his shoulders, his silver-gray eyes penetrating. “You’re scared, I get that. I know it must be hard for you, and I have no right to dismiss what you’re going through, but if you’re willing to walk away from my brother because you’re too much of a chickenshit to take a risk, well, he’s better off without you.”

Sloane stared at him. Wow. The kid really didn’t mince words when it came to his family. Cael’s expression softened, but he remained firm on his position. Sloane couldn’t blame Cael for being protective of his big brother. A part of Sloane believed Dex was indeed better off without him, but the other half of him didn’t want to let go.

“I respect you, Sloane, and that won’t go away no matter what you decide. I’m asking you to really think about things. Don’t let him get caught up in a future with you if you have no intention of ever letting it get that far.”

Sloane mulled over Cael’s words and decided to take a chance. “And if I don’t walk away? If things do work out?”

“If he’s happy, I’m happy. As long as no one finds out.” Cael smiled a wide dopey grin. “I like having him on our team.”

The door opened and Dex came strolling in with a cheerful smile. “Hey, Chirpy, you ready to….”

“Oh my God, Dex!” Cael wailed, his eyes going huge, and his face turning a bright crimson.

Dex saw Sloane and cringed. “Woops.”

“Chirpy?” Sloane arched an eyebrow at Cael, holding back a laugh.

“You dick!” Cael’s murderous glare was at full strength, and Sloane was relieved it wasn’t aimed at him. For all his timidness, Cael could be pretty scary at times. “You swore you’d never call me that in public! I can’t believe you.”

“I didn’t know anyone was here!” Dex replied in a panic. “I’m sorry!”

Cael declared loudly, “When Dex was fourteen, we walked in on him with his penis in the vacuum cleaner hose!”

Dex let out a dramatic gasp. “Judas! How could you?” He turned to Sloane, who was desperately trying not to laugh. “It’s not what you think.”

“It’s exactly what you think,” Cael said with a smug grin. “He tried to fuck the vacuum.”

“It was an accident,” Dex insisted.

Cael rolled his eyes. “Really? You were vacuuming your room, slipped, and ‘oh, look at that. Vacuum fell on my penis.’ Please.”

Sloane burst into laughter. He doubled over, covered his face with his hands, his shoulders shaking as he tried to control himself.
Oh, fuck
. He didn’t have words. The brothers continued to argue, until Cael gave in, apologized, and they made up. On the ride back to HQ, Sloane had to bite the inside of his cheeks to keep himself from breaking out into spontaneous laughter, especially since Dex sulked the entire way. That had been hours ago.

Now, he lay sprawled on his bed in his sleeper bay, staring at the ceiling. With Unit Alpha working overtime to find Isaac, squads were taking turns catching a few hours of sleep in the bays. It was easier to spend the night here than waste time going home, not to mention less dangerous. The THIRDS didn’t want any of their agents falling asleep behind the wheel. Not that Sloane’s apartment was far, and he could always take a cab. Unlike many other agents, Sloane really had no need to sleep here, but he found it comforting.

Since Gabe had died, he’d spent a lot of rough nights here at HQ. He’d made countless excuses to himself as to why that was, but now he knew the truth. He didn’t want to go home to his big empty apartment. He wasn’t one of those guys who always needed to have someone in his bed, but he’d be fooling no one if he said he didn’t like having a certain someone in his bed. It was his own fault. He’d been spending too much time with Dex, either sleeping in Dex’s bed or having Dex in his own, but there was something about the guy that made it hard for Sloane to stay away. The last few days had been fucking miserable.

Sloane rolled onto his side with a huff. God, look at him, sulking like some teenager infected with puppy love. So he liked having Dex around. So what? Who the hell
didn’t
like having Dex around? Ash of course, but well, it was Ash. Eight months, and his team had accepted Dex as one of their own, as if he’d always been there. Rosa fussed over him as much as she did Cael, acting like a mother hen despite being a couple of years older than Dex. Letty teased and roughhoused with him as if they were siblings, jumping on him, hugging him, asking him for advice on whatever hot guy she had her eye on, while Calvin and Hobbs followed Dex around like a couple of groupies.

Dex walked around with a smile on his face, giving his undivided attention to whoever approached him, going out of his way to help however he could. He wasn’t arrogant or cocky, but playful. At times, he was shy, hiding behind his humor or that dopey grin of his. He was weird, no doubt about it, what with his bizarre fixation on music released before 1989, his unhealthy obsession with cheese snacks, and his inability to shut up at times, but somehow, that made him more attractive in Sloane’s eyes.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” Sloane groaned at himself, rubbing his hands over his face. He should have been sleeping, instead he was thinking about how great Dex was. If the guy was so goddamn great, what the hell was Sloane doing alone? He kept telling himself he wasn’t ready to label whatever he had with Dex, especially since it was strictly between them, so what was the point, but what else was Dex if not his boyfriend? They weren’t sleeping around. Hell, the thought of Dex being fucked by someone else made him want to punch something.

Dex was a good guy, faithful, smart, funny, sexy, and he was crazy about Sloane. What more could Sloane want? He should be counting his lucky stars that a guy like Dex wanted anything to do with his miserable ass, and what was he doing? Disciplining him, and beating the shit out of him for saving a teammate’s life. Cael’s words kept coming back to him. The kid had really called him out on his behavior. And he was right. Sloane was being a complete chickenshit.

He was such an asshole. If he wasn’t with Dex, he had no one to blame but himself. No matter how many times he told himself Dex had disobeyed orders, deep down, he knew that wasn’t it. Had anyone else on the team done what Dex did, Sloane would have been royally pissed off at first, but then he would have been proud of them. He sure as hell wouldn’t have taken disciplinary measures.

It had been easy to let his anger get out of hand and turn into something else. Was he taking it out on Dex because he was too scared of where things were heading? This was their first real fight. Sure, they’d argued plenty of times before, but it never resulted in this… this horrible feeling in his chest. He sat up and shifted to the edge of the bed with a frown. Getting up, he pulled back the covers, determined to get some sleep, when he heard faint music. It was coming from the room next door.

The rooms were heavily insulated so occupants could go about their business without disturbing their fellow agents. He doubted his Human teammates could hear the tune, and if Sloane’s room hadn’t been silent, he wouldn’t have either. Curious, he pressed his ear to the wall, his heart lurching when he heard the familiar power ballad. He closed his eyes as he listened to the faint lyrics of Journey’s “Faithfully.”

Straightening, he left his room, closing the door behind him, and with a deep breath, he knocked on the door next to his. He ran his fingers through his hair in a feeble attempt to comb it back then told himself to stop being such an ass. The door opened, and a tired, disheveled-looking Dex sporting a distressed
Back to the Future
T-shirt and gray sweats stood on the other side.

“Hi. I heard the music.”

“Oh.” Dex walked over to the desk and tapped his tablet, turning it down. “Sorry.”

“No, I didn’t mean it was bothering me. When I heard it, I figured it was you.”

Dex nodded.

“Can I come in?”

“You’re the Team Leader. You can do what you want.” Dex took a seat on the edge of his bed, his gaze going to his bare feet.

“I didn’t come here to fight,” Sloane said with a sigh, closing the door behind him and locking it. He joined Dex on the edge of the bed.

Again, Dex nodded, but didn’t say anything. Sloane watched him worry his bottom lip, close his eyes, and release a heavy sigh. “You have a job to do, I get it. I’ve been a THIRDS agent a few months. You’ve been one for years. Who the hell am I to question your judgment?”

“I deleted the reprimand.”

Dex stared at him. “Why?”

“Because it wasn’t right. Hell, even Ash was pissed off at me for it.”

“Ash?” Dex’s expression would have made Sloane laugh if he wasn’t feeling so shitty about what he’d done, not to mention how far he’d let it go. What kind of a partner was he?

“Yeah, he said if it had been anyone else on the team, I wouldn’t have done it, and he’s right. What you did was brave, kinda stupid too, but brave.”

“So why did you do it?”

“I’ve been asking myself the same question since the day of the bombing. I think a part of me wondered if you thought the rules didn’t apply to you because we’re sleeping together.” He wanted to tell Dex about the other part, the part that was scared shitless of a relationship.

“I’d never take advantage like that. I disobeyed the order because it wasn’t right. Not to me.”

“Dex, I understand that, I do, but sometimes we have to make decisions we don’t want to make or that don’t seem to make sense. Our objective and how we feel about it won’t always add up. The team is our family, and we do what we have to in order to protect it, but there are priorities. That’s the job.” It hurt to say it, but he had to, because it was the truth. “I have to do everything in my power to preserve civilian life, even if it means losing one of my own. Even if it means… losing you.”

“Still, it doesn’t make it any easier when it’s staring you in the face,” Dex murmured, his gaze everywhere else but on Sloane.

“No.”

“I didn’t mean to make your job harder than it is.”

Sloane shook his head. “This is on me. You said the structure was sound, I should have trusted you. That’s part of my job too.” He needed to make some changes, to take more chances. Now was as good a time as any to start. “I did learn something else from all this.”

“Oh?” Dex did look at him then.

Sloane was pouting, but he couldn’t help it. Thinking back to the last few days and how it had felt without Dex. It sucked. “Yeah, I don’t like how it feels.”

“How what feels?”

“Fighting like this.”

Dex looked surprised by his admission. “So… what you’re saying is you like having me around?”

“You know I do.” He studied Dex’s guarded expression. The guy was crap at trying to hide his feelings. “Don’t you?”

Dex gave him a warm smile, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “Yeah.”

“Cael’s right. You’re a shitty liar.” Sloane shifted closer to him and slipped an arm around him, tentatively pulling him closer, relieved when Dex went along with it. “It’s okay. You’re right. I could do a better job of showing you. It’s not just about the sex. I apologize if I gave you that impression.”

“Don’t get me wrong, I’m not complaining about the sex,” Dex said, holding back a smile.

“Me neither.”

Dex smiled, and this time it reached his sparkling-blue eyes. He gave Sloane’s shoulder a playful bump, his voice teasing. “Did you miss me?”

God, the guy had no idea. “I couldn’t sleep.” He frowned knowing he probably looked and sounded pathetic. “And yeah, I did miss you.”

“You’ve ruined Journey for me, you know that? Anytime I hear it, all I can see is you.”

Sloane was taken aback. He knew exactly what that meant for Dex. He cupped Dex’s cheek, using his thumb to stroke the stubble growing in. Now that he looked closer, he could see the bags under Dex’s eyes, and he had a feeling it wasn’t just from the case. It looked like Sloane wasn’t the only one who’d had trouble sleeping since the day of the bombing. He leaned in hesitantly, allowing Dex time to pull away, or tell him to get the hell out if he wanted. Instead, Dex leaned into him so their lips pressed together.

Dex’s scent reminded Sloane how crazy Dex made him feel. He slipped his hand around the back of Dex’s neck, pulling him harder against him, their kiss quickly turning heated. He tried to slow down—for fuck’s sake, it had been a few days—but he couldn’t. Dex’s scent, his taste, the feel of his body pressed against Sloane’s was hitting all the right buttons, and Sloane wanted more. He pulled off Dex’s shirt. “How about a little Journey?”

“You’re asking for Journey?” Dex breathed, his fingers digging into Sloane’s arms. “Wow, you really did miss my sexing you up.”

“You have no idea,” Sloane replied with a chuckle, his eyes glued to Dex as he tapped the tablet and raised the volume. When Dex turned to him, his smile stole Sloane’s breath away.

“I think maybe I do.”

Their bodies crashed together in a frenzy of desperate kisses, painful rutting, and scorching touches. By the way they assaulted each other’s lips, it was as if they’d been apart for years rather than days. Sloane lay over Dex, his fingers curled around fistfuls of Dex’s hair, his mouth hungrily plundering, reveling in the taste of his lover. Beneath him, Dex writhed and arched his back, gasping for air after Sloane released his mouth. Dex’s fingers dug into Sloane’s ass, their cocks painfully hard.

“Sloane, I need you to fuck me. Please.”

“Supplies?”

Dex motioned to his backpack on the desk’s chair, and Sloane reached out, snatching one of the straps and yanking it over. He sat back on his heels, rummaged through one of the zipper pockets, pulling out a condom and a small packet of lube. Beneath him, Dex broke speed records undressing. He threw his clothes to the floor, and Sloane’s clothes soon joined them, along with Dex’s backpack.