Broken Legacy (Secret Lives Series) (6 page)

Eloise’s chest heaved. The explanation she sought after lay in her hand. “Why? Why did you not tell me immediately?”

Lenister
met her eyes. He wiped his hand over his mouth in a manner as if contemplating the situation. “I am not accustomed to baring my soul to others, Eloise, and especially with such a delicate subject. Yes, the children are mine, but it changes nothing.”

Eloise shook her head unconsciously. “No,” she contradicted him. “It changes everything. It matters to me.”

“Why? I haven’t lied to you. They are children, for God’s sake! I would have thought you, out of everyone, it would not have mattered!” He threw the words at her angrily. He gazed so deeply that she turned from him and stared at the wall.

“It matters to me,” she answered, ignoring his insinuation of her birth. “How dare you! You who threatened my family. It does. It changes everything. You want me to act only to your
wants, as all of this is some sort of game where I'm not to know the rules. This is no game. There is no need to treat me like I'm the enemy. There was no need to threaten me. Do you think I’m so heartless that I would not extend my hand to help if I could?"

"You are telling me you would have easily complied
? I don't believe you," he said severely. "You expected me to outpour my deepest thoughts to someone I have only just met."

“Yet, it’s acceptable to marry me," she countered.

"I need your connections, no more!"

“But it is not me you should be worried about. Do you understand what you are facing and the odds that are against you? You say you have been across the Channel…”

“I know, my lady. I know well enough!” Lenister uttered loudly in exasperation. The room hushed. An eerie silence ensued before he repeated in a murmur, “I know well this is no game. I do. In all, I have need of you and in your own way, you have need of me. Only, you don’t comprehend it…yet.”

“So you are planning
to return?” she asked. The sarcasm echoed in her tone. 

“You are
an odd one, Lady Eloise. I’m confused as to whether you are upset because you are to marry me or upset with the idea of what could happen to me across the Channel.”

"
Odd?" she challenged. Her hands threw the letter in the air. Her eyes flamed. She bounded off the bed. She picked up an empty vase on her dresser. She threw it at him. Ducking, the porcelain broke into a million pieces. "Get out! Get out!" she screamed. Her eyes frantically searched for another object to throw at him. She reached for her water pitcher, but his arms had hold of her. "Let go of me!"

"Calm yourself," he said, switching his grip to get a better hold. She pushed against him, but he was too strong.

“I can't be calm. You should listen to your cousin's warning. She is right. Do you not think I realize that the
ton
wants nothing more than to shun me? They are not without their reasons, monsieur, more so than they even know. You think you know me…Edmund thinks he knows me…you may well regret your decision…in all, you may have made a dreadful mistake in wanting to marry
moi
."

He took hold of her and sat on the bed, pulling her down with him. "Sit." For a time he kept looking at her
, and her eyes lowered. Those eyes seemed to look into her soul. He reached for her, lifting her chin up with his fingers. The tension eased and her anger melted with his touch.

"So you feel trapped," he said softly. “Like a bird in a cage, a beautiful bird. I see an exquisitely beautiful and indisputably intelligent wom
an who, in her actions, wants nothing more than to disappear from Society.”

“I don’t fit into their world…your world.”

“I beg to differ. I believe you will fit nicely into my world. True, I don’t shun Society and quite enjoy it at times, but I like my solitude. I spend a great deal of time in Northampton at my country estate. I believe you will enjoy it also, far away from prying eyes. And also the coastline, which may interfere with your smuggling. Although I’m afraid, I must insist we put an end to such.”

“As you wish.”

Suddenly, he laughed again, a  hearty laugh, shaking his head. “Convincing, my Lady Eloise, but for some reason I don’t believe a word of it from your lips.”

She braced her arms against the bed
, readied to retreat, but he was quicker. His hand caught hers and pulled her back. “Lady Eloise, we all have our demons within our past. I might well say the same to you about me, but within me this course I chose with you is the right one. I wasn’t being untruthful to you that we both need each other.”

“You…you will find…”

“This was my wish for us to marry. I will not hold it against you for my actions. Many marriages are arranged for less reasons. Truth be known, my intentions were to marry you regardless before meeting you and after...after I was determined to do so. Excluding the situation I find myself in, I can list the reasons for the benefits for the marriage on paper, but at the moment…my lady, you are a very desirable woman. It has been a long time since I have wanted...”

He said nothing else, but reached over, caressing her bare arms. His hand slipped up under her chin, lifting it ever so slightly. He leaned down and kissed her moist
, yielding lips. In the next instant, his mouth claimed hers, invading hers, possessing her. At first, her instincts were to fight back, but quickly all resistance faded. She forgot all except his warm lips upon her and she responded to him. He bent back her head and kissed her throat, igniting emotions that she thought long buried.

Eloise's mind reeled from his touch, trying desperately to remind herself she hated him. He threatened her family; forced her into a marriage she didn't want; ruined her well
-laid plans. Only...only she didn't hate him. She hated herself for allowing herself to respond to him. The trembling weakness in her limbs attested to his power over her.

His lips broke from her. Reason flooded back. Turning slightly, she uttered in a voice lower than a whisper, "It may be better if you go…”

“Not yet.” He released her. Looking quite pleased with himself, he retrieved the box and placed it in her hand. “My wedding present to you. They were my mother’s. I hope you will find them acceptable and wear them tomorrow.”

Her hands accepted the box, opening it tentatively. The pearls, the beautiful glistering pearls. Her hands reached in. The strands fell over her hand. She looked up at
Lenister.

“They are
so beautiful. I never have…” She choked up, admonishing herself for becoming emotional. She closed the box and tried to hand it back to Lenister. “I can’t accept them. They are…”

“
My lady?”

“I’m sorry. Truly, but they were your mother’s…”

“Lady Eloise, do you understand we are to be married tomorrow? You do understand the whole of the ramifications of being married.”

“I understand well, my
lord. It is you who doesn’t understand.”

Her eyes
 searched his. Her thoughts had been held to the discovery of her activities. Sensations she had long suppressed emerged along with a remembrance. Deep within her surged words slung at her from another time.
Hussy
.
Harlot.
No one will take you now for a bride. You are worthy for only one purpose now
.

“Then tell me,
Lady Eloise, what you think I do not understand?” he uttered into the night’s air. “That perhaps I’m not marrying a virgin?”

* * * *

The room became deathly quiet. The only sound she heard was the beating of her heart. For a brief moment in time, she had allowed herself to feel again, but the past she had tried so desperately to put behind her stared straight into her eyes. She didn't know how long she sat silent.

He gave her the moment, but didn't yield. Taking her by her shoulders, he turned her to face him. She pushed upward with her arms. Without much effort, he obstructed her escape.

Anger built within her. How dare he! He had only to utter words to make her trust him...to want him.

"Let go of me!" she cried, trying to jerk out of his hold.

Immediately, his hands released her, but only momentarily. He grasped her face in his hands, intertwining his fingers in her unruly hair. He gently drew her up to his face. He kissed her and released a desire that began to stir within her. His tongue prodded her lips open and claimed her with his kiss. Slowly, he broke from her.

"Eloise, my Eloise," he whispered over her lips.

The tension in her body eased. Her hands pressed against his chest. "You make no sense..." she stuttered. “You all but called me a..."

His finger quickly lay upon her lips. He shook his head. "It is not what I said. You are the one
who said I didn’t understand." He leaned down and kissed her again.

"Does it matter?"
She caught her breath. "It is the past. It has no bearing upon the future. If you must insist, it was only a brief period of my life and it has long been over."

“It does to me. You are to be my wife in the morn. Is there someone I should call out? What if…?”

“You are being absurd! You can leave. Leave me. I don’t care. It is not me who wants this marriage. It is you.” Her voice trembled. She pushed against him. “Go. I will not defend actions I don’t believe need to be defended. If you look for me to repent and say I’m sorry, it will not come, monsieur. Never!”

Her words resonated within the room. Her earlier hysteria
was replaced with an utter wretchedness. Silence returned.

He sighed deeply. “Then I ask only if it will interfere with my mission. That I have to know, Eloise.”

Slowly, she shook her head. “
Non, non
.”

She stood. She had to get out of his grasp. She couldn’t think with him so near, but he rose with her. His arms wrapped around her
, keeping her within his gaze.

“You have to believe I don’t want to hurt you, Eloise,” he said gently. “It is not my intent. If you say it is in the past and will not interfere with my mission, I will never mention it again.”

Silent tears fell down her cheek. Swallowing hard, she said in a low voice, no louder than a whisper, “He is dead, monsieur. Dead for many years. When my father and brother brought me over, it was for that reason. I don’t even know all the details of their venture over to get
moi
. Only…they came and the years of my father’s denial I was his legitimate daughter dissipated.”

His hand caressed her cheek and embraced her tighter.

“I don’t want your sympathy,” she said faintly. “Nor your forgiveness.”

“You misunderstand me, Eloise. I don’t feel sympathy for you. No, it’s not sympathy
.” He pushed back her hair from her face, his voice quiet and calm. “It is far from what I feel for you. I misspoke before. The word I should have used is fascinate. You fascinate me, my lady.”

“I doubt…”

“Ssh,” he said. “I don’t know the life you led before we met. I have heard the rumors, but I also know your brother. His Grace is a man who takes great pride in his family. He cares greatly for you, as is evident in the whole of your family. Before he consented to this marriage, he made me give my word that I would care for you and try to make you happy. I gave him my word and I will hold to it.”

“My brother doesn’t know all…”

“And I’m telling you it matters only to me the present. Now,” he gave her a small smile, “my lady, I need only to know whether it will interfere with my plan to rescue my children. That is all. I need you to tell me the truth.”

“The truth,
monsieur. The truth? I doubt it. You want only to use it against me. What more do you want from me? You threaten my family and now expect me to…”

“Stop. You know now my reason for the threat.”

“You would not hold to it.”

He hesitated, but for a moment only. “If you want honesty,
Lady Eloise, I will be blunt. I will do what I have to do to ensure my children’s safety. I protect my family at all cost.” He reached over and caressed her face. “Which in the morn, you will be also. Nothing you have said has changed my mind on the notion of taking you for my wife.”

“I do not know what you want me to say, my
lord. I can be no less candid with my words. In my life, I have been taught a woman is born and raised to honor her husband and family. There are consequences to such unbecoming behavior.

“I have seen such consequences. One of the girls from my convent, Adele Baptiste, married Baron de Cenviere. To ensure all knew of her purity, the
stained bedsheets were hung out the window. To ensure I understood the significance of such an action, I was taken by carriage to see the sight.”

“That might have been custom in some provinces in France, but not here.”

“Ah, monsieur. You did not let me finish. The week before, the daughter of the Count de Valmie, Celine, had been caught with her lover, a young handsome lawyer from Riems. A commoner, no less. She…she was given a
lettres de cachet,
banished to a life in a convent with no hope of outside world ever again. Then…” She paused. Refusing to let the water welling in her eyes betray her weakness, she breathed out in a deep manner.