Camouflaged (Hiding From Love #0.5) (6 page)

“No.” She shook her head violently. “No. We’re going to go out there and you’re going to get yourself killed trying to save me. You can’t do this. It’s suicide. I don’t want to be in that cave by myself. Let’s stay here in the truck. Please.”

My heart felt like it was bleeding a drop of blood with every drop of saltwater that rolled from her eyes. I reached out and pulled her to me.

“Shh, shh. Alexis. It’s okay. First of all, part of being prepared is thinking about every possibility. But that’s all they are—possibilities. I wouldn’t have us do this if I didn’t think we had a good chance of pulling it off—both of us.”
Finally
, I thought,
all that practice lying to women is serving a purpose
. “Secondly, I’m a soldier. We get ourselves killed to save other people every single day. It’s my job. I’ve been putting myself at risk to protect you for three years now. You just weren’t around to see it.”

She hiccupped and sat back. “Wow. I never thought about it that way.” I smiled at her. “But that doesn’t make it any better,” she declared.

“Maybe not, but can we talk about it later. Maybe after we’re settled in the cave? I’m feeling like we need to get out of here sooner rather than later.”

I saw her draw herself up, take a deep breath, and wipe the last tear from her face. She blew out the breath before looking me in the eye steadily. “Okay, I’m ready. Let’s do this.”

I couldn’t help but smile at her spunk. Dammit. I needed to get her out of this alive and whole. That was all that mattered here. Just her.

I picked up her hand and gave it a squeeze. “Follow me and do exactly as I say.”

She nodded, and I crawled out of the truck with one really tough little humanitarian right behind me.

We scooted on our stomachs underneath the truck from the front to the back. I realized too late I should have given Alexis my uniform jacket because she was on her elbows in the dirt and rocks with a short-sleeved t-shirt on. I wondered how Nick had done this hero shit. There were a lot of details to keep track of.

When we reached the back end of the truck, I signaled Alexis to stay put. She nodded, and I gingerly scooted out from under, a few inches at a time. When I could finally roll onto my side and curl my knees to get my legs clear of the back bumper, I gathered my resolve. In one continuous movement, I rolled into a crouch and threw myself up into the back underneath the tarp.

When no shots rang out, I nearly cheered with relief. Not only had I survived the exposure, but it led me to believe the guy shooting at the front of the truck might be the only one out there. He couldn’t see behind the truck well, and that was in our favor.

I looked around at the cargo, grabbing a few more bottles of water and stuffing them in various pockets. I finally understood why our uniforms had all those damn hidden pockets. Next I unhooked the beige camo tarp that hung across the back of the truck, keeping behind it as I went. When I got it down, I knelt and rolled it up enough to move it. My quads ached from all the squatting.

I managed the transition from the back of the truck to the ground underneath without any incidents. The tarp now lay in a pile right under the bumper, ready to provide a thin, relatively useless layer between Alexis and a high-powered rifle. It sucked, but it was all I had.

“Are you ready?” I whispered to her.

She swallowed and whispered back, “I guess so.”

“Look along the side of the hill. Do you see that opening about twenty yards down?”

She squinted against the sun that bounced around off all the naked, pale surfaces, finally nodding when she spotted the place I’d pointed out.

“That’s where you’re heading. They teach us to watch for potential fallback positions, so I saw it as we passed. Here’s what you’re going to do: scoot out from under here, but stay crouched down. Get that tarp and pull the edge up over your head. Stay low, but go as fast as you can. Keep your back to the road and head straight to that cave. I’ll be right behind you. It’ll all be fine, I promise.”

She looked at me with those big eyes. God, it was all I could do to keep from reaching out and pulling her to me for a kiss. Anything to take that fear away.

“And Alexis? No matter what you hear, don’t stop.” I could see the doubt cross her face, the beginning of an argument simmering. I put my finger up against her lips, caught for a moment in the vision of their plump moistness wrapped around that finger and other things. Fuck. Near-death experiences didn’t seem to do a damn thing to deter my dick.

“Don’t argue with me. I mean it. If you hear gunshots, if you do or don’t hear me behind you, no matter
what
you hear, keep going. Your job is to keep that tarp over your head and get to that cave as fast as you can. Got it?”

Her voice broke as she whispered. “Yeah.” Then, in a move that completely shocked me, she leaned over and pressed a sweet, soft kiss on my lips. And she was gone, scooting forward from under the truck and wrapping the tarp around her crouching form.

I was so blown away by the kiss I almost missed the fact that she was now standing up and running toward the hillside. I bolted out from under the truck, M4 in hand, my eyes scanning the opposite side of the ravine. We made it about halfway there before a shot rang out, chipping the rock just behind my head.

“Fuck!” I muttered to myself as I flattened my back against the rock and pointed my gun, shuffling quickly toward the cave. To her credit, Alexis didn’t slow down, and she was three quarters of the way to what I hoped was safety.

Another shot rang out and exploded even farther behind me. My brain calculated that it must have been the same guy who’d taken shots at me in front of the truck, and he wasn’t in range or at the right angle to get us as we headed for the cave. Hoping I was right, I turned my back to him and ran, arriving just behind Alexis, safe—at least for the moment.

A
lexis
and I spent that first day in the cave trying to recover from nearly being blown up. I didn’t want to tell her that it was unlikely anyone would be able to get to us until the next day. A rescue mission in the dark would be virtually useless. I also knew that if the insurgents had this whole canyon tied up, it was going to be damn hard for my guys to find a way in. The stress was fraying Alexis’s nerves, so I tried to do whatever I could to alleviate her anxieties.

When it started to get dark and the temperature dropped, I got out the blankets I’d packed up from the truck. We were lucky that the cave was deep and there wasn’t much debris inside—only a few large rocks and lots of flat dirt.

“I can put one of these down underneath and you can use the other one on top so you don’t have to lie in the dirt,” I told her as she sat staring out the opening to the cave.

She turned toward me and I could see how discouraged she was. Her face was drawn and her lips were tense. “Do you have more for yourself?” she asked.

“Nah, but I’ve got on all this gear. I’ll be fine.”

She scowled at me. “That’s just dumb. I know you’re all into the macho guy thing, but I’m tough. I can handle a night of cold weather. I’ll take one blanket and you have the other.”

I shook my head. “You’re stubborn as hell, you know that?”

“No, I don’t play into your bullshit sexism, and that pisses you off.”

“Jesus,” I burst out. “Here we go. Once again, I’m the big, bad Alpha dog. For your information,
babe
, I’d make the same offer to a civilian
dude
who didn’t have a jacket. I’m trying to be a nice person. Only you could turn that into some sort of politically incorrect power play.”

She rolled her eyes, grabbed one of the blankets from me, and threw herself onto the dirt, curling up in a little ball.

I shook my head at her for a moment. “Alexis, seriously. You’re going to be inhaling dirt all night and freeze half to death. Will you let me make you a bed so you can be comfortable? I promise not to tell anyone you gave in to my chauvinistic gesture.”

She rolled over and glared at me for a minute before a small smile broke loose around her mouth. Pretty soon she was giggling and I grinned back at her.

Finally, she said, “So, if I were another soldier, what would you be doing?”

“Honestly?” I asked.

“Yeah, of course.”

“Well, we’d probably both roll up in our own blankets because we’re too attached to our soldier cards to do the thing that’s actually recommended.”

She propped her head up on her arm. “What’s actually recommended?”

“If you’re exposed in the cold with another person, the best thing you can do is find a small space and curl up together for shared body warmth. Just think of little animals like foxes in their dens. Pretty much the same concept.”

She seemed to consider that for a minute. “We don’t have a small space.”

“True. This cave does some of the same things—protects us from the direct wind, traps some of the heat we put off. But it doesn’t get any sunlight during the day so it’s not real warm to start with.”

“So the smart thing to do would still be to curl up together for the shared body warmth?”

When I’d started this conversation, I’d been answering her questions. No ulterior motives. But now, faced with the prospect of curling up with Alexis, I was having a hard time answering objectively.
Boyfriend
, I told myself.
Across the ocean
, myself answered back.

“Uh, well, sharing body heat is the best thing to do for survival . . .” I trailed off, not sure where to go with the whole thing.

She blinked at me a couple of times and then yawned. “Well, I think we should do that. The sharing body warmth. That way we can both lie on one blanket and put the other one over us.”

She seemed perfectly fine with this idea. I felt my pants tighten and had to clear my throat before I answered her.

“You’d really be okay with that?” I asked, one eyebrow raised.

“Sure. Why not?”

“Well, there’s your boyfriend and all,” I replied.

“We’re snuggling for survival, Gabe. Not screwing like bunnies.”

“I know, I just, well . . . have you slept with a lot of guys without the sex part?”

“Not a lot, but a few. I mean, I’ve got a guy friend I’ve slept with a bunch of times when one of us had drunk too much to drive home.”

“And your boyfriend was okay with that? Is this friend gay?” I asked, not believing for a second any straight guy could sleep next to Alexis and not try to score.

“Yes, Marco was fine with it, and no, the guy’s not gay. He’s just a friend, and we’re not like that. You’ve never slept with a girl without having sex?”

I scratched my head. “Well, actually . . .”

Her eyes widened. Then she gave one harsh laugh. “You have got to be kidding me.”

“Uh, no?”

“You’ve never slept with a girl without having sex?”

“Hell, I’ve never
slept
with a girl at all. I, uh, I always go. You know, afterwards.”

The look of horror that crossed her face would have been funny if I hadn’t felt like such an ass. I’d never thought about it before, but her reaction told me I’d made a wrong turn somewhere in my sexual past.

She lay back down on the ground, staring up at the ceiling. “My God,” she muttered. “You’re more of a Neanderthal than I thought.”

“Fuck, it’s not that big of a deal,” I mumbled as I stood up and paced across the cave to the far wall.

She sat up and spoke to my back. “I’m sorry. That was rude of me. You’re not a Neanderthal. You’ve been a perfect gentleman since after that first day we met, but your experiences have been different than mine. It’s not your fault you’re really hot and have women ready to screw you everywhere you go.”

I turned around and looked at her, incredulous. “Did you just say I’m ‘really hot’?” I asked, a grin breaking out across my face.

She pursed her gorgeous ruby lips. “Don’t let it go to your head, soldier boy. But yes, all the UN girls are always asking me about you and saying how hot you are.”

“All the UN girls, huh? And what about you? You think I’m hot?”

“Um, I’ve got a boyfriend. Let’s just leave it at that.”

“Okay,
babe
, if that’s how you want it.”

I felt my grin grow even bigger. She thought I was hot. She didn’t want to admit it, but she did. My chest swelled a couple of sizes and I thought maybe getting shot at had been worth it after all.

“So, back to the issue at hand,” she said, breaking me out of my lustful celebration. “You’re going to try something new tonight. You’re going to sleep snuggled up with a woman you are not having sex with. And we are going to stay warm and not have to lie in the dust. How’s that?”

I walked back to her. “Sounds like a plan,” I said.

After we got the bottom blanket laid out, Alexis and I awkwardly settled in with the other blanket over us. At first we both lay side by side on our backs. I didn’t know how to handle the accidental touches. I didn’t want her to think I was trying to initiate something I shouldn’t. As I lay staring up at the ceiling, feeling like I was on a bed of nails, she whispered, “Gabe?”

“Yeah?”

“Even though we’re not going to . . . you’re allowed to touch me. I mean, not, you know . . .“ she sighed.

“So, I can’t feel you up, but I can touch you, right?” I grinned in the now dark cave.

“Something like that, yeah. If the point is to share body heat, our bodies might need to touch somehow, don’t you think?”

“Okay. But since you’re the expert on this whole ‘cuddling with guys you’re not screwing’ thing, maybe you better coach me on it.”

I held my breath, waiting for her answer. I’m not sure what I was hoping for, but my limbs were tingling with anticipation for something almost tangible yet still out of reach.

Finally, she said, “Come here,” as she reached across my body and pulled on my arm.

I rolled toward her, onto my side. “Like this?” I asked, my voice oddly husky.

“Yeah,” she answered, so quiet I almost didn’t hear her. Then she rolled onto her side and wiggled back into the curve of my body.
Spooning
. The word flashed in my mind. I kept my free arm at my side, still too unsure to touch her of my own volition. Then she reached up behind her and found my hand. She pulled it over her and wrapped my arm around her waist. Once it was there, she kept ahold of my hand. I inhaled, her soft hair tickling my nose and filling it with the scent of wildflowers.

“Am I doing it right?” I whispered, trying hard not to think about her incredible ass right up against my crotch.

“Yeah,” she answered, sounding sleepy. “You’re doing it perfectly.”

I swallowed, astounded by how incredible it made me feel to hear her praise. I could picture myself spending years basking in the glow of that approval.

“Goodnight, babe.”

I could hear the smile in her voice. “Goodnight, soldier boy.”

I’m not sure how much time passed before I was awakened, but the light outside the cave had started to shift, taking on that cool hue that said the sun was just behind it. The temperature was cold enough for me to see my breath, and the cave had a dampness to it that wasn’t present when we’d entered during the warmer temperatures of the day.

Initially, I wasn’t sure what had woken me, but it was only a few moments before I heard a noise outside. I immediately rolled onto my knees, pulling my pistol out of the holster I’d placed next to me when we went to sleep. I crouched silently, my eyes straining to see something outside the cave. I heard the sound again—a shuffling and grating, like two hard objects being rubbed against one another.

I stood on silent cat feet and stepped toward the wall of the cave where my M4 stood upright against the rock. Putting the pistol in my waistband, I held the rifle at the ready.

“Gabe?” I heard Alexis whisper from our makeshift bed.

“Shhh,” I answered. “Don’t move.”

With my back against the wall of the cave, I inched my way up to the opening and looked outside toward our truck.

Sure enough, I saw the outline of a man moving around the back of the truck. He was pulling out the supplies we’d hauled from the U.N. program. My mind churned, trying to decide whether I should stay quiet or try to stop him. I wanted to get a better look to see if there was more than one guy, so I stepped forward, away from the protection of the cave wall. As I did, loose gravel slid under my foot, echoing around the hard surfaces of the ravine we were trapped in.

The guy stopped moving, and I held as still as possible, my breath caught in my throat. Behind me, I heard Alexis breathing, and she made a tiny gasping sound, her fear bouncing around the cave like a moth in a light fixture. Then a shot blasted from the direction of the truck. It was dark enough that I saw the spark of light as the explosion left the gun.

I reflexively leaned back into the entryway to the cave and actually heard the bullet whistle as it sped by me, lodging in the rocks beyond. Before I could recover, there were footsteps, the sound growing closer with every second. I’m not sure if your senses become more acute in an instance like that or if it was my imagination, but I swore I heard the click of the magazine being cocked on the guy’s gun as he came toward me.