Chesapeake 10 - A Seaside Christmas (9 page)

“Dillon, it’s not that big a deal. Caleb and I are over,” she said, even though a part of her knew that was a flat-out lie. “This is about work. Haven’t you ever had to work with someone you didn’t particularly get along with?”

“You’re the talented songwriter,” he argued, not giving her a direct answer. “Bree needs you. Shouldn’t you get to call the shots?”

“Bree needs my music,” Jenny agreed. “Or I should say she wants it. She could always hire another songwriter. What she can’t do is replace the kind of buzz that having Caleb in the play will create. His presence could help to take her career to a whole different level.”

“Never mind the strain it puts on you in the meantime,” he said bitterly.

“Dillon, she and I talked about this before she ever made an offer to Caleb,” Jenny explained, then added as she had to her uncle, “If I’d said no, she wouldn’t have asked him.”

“Then why didn’t you say no?” he asked, studying her. Understanding apparently dawned. “Oh, my God, you want him here, don’t you?” He sighed heavily. “I should have seen it right off. You’re not over him.”

“Yes, I am,” she insisted, refusing to acknowledge that Dillon might be right.

His smile was tinged with sorrow. “Give it up, Jenny. I could always tell when you were lying, even to yourself. Even though Caleb humiliated you and broke your heart, you still want him.”

She started to deny it yet again, then shrugged. “Okay, maybe there are some old feelings left, but I don’t want there to be.”

“That’s not quite the same thing as being over him, though, is it?”

“No, but I’m not going back there, Dillon. I’ve learned my lesson.”

He studied her, clearly unconvinced. “Good luck with that.”

Despite her very firm declaration that there would be no future with Caleb, she couldn’t help feeling that she owed Dillon an apology for the future that wasn’t in the cards for them, either. “I’m sorry.”

“Why are you sorry?” he asked, though his expression was sad. “You broke up with me years ago.” He gave her a rueful look. “Unfortunately, that didn’t stop me from hoping that maybe we were going to have a second chance.”

“Dillon—”

“Stop. No need to be upset,” he told her. “It’s not as if you made me any promises. Heck, you didn’t even want to have dinner with me.”

“Only because I didn’t want anyone, least of all you, to get the wrong impression,” she said gently. “You were my best friend once. I’d like to think we’re still friends, but that’s all it will ever be. And despite what you think, that has nothing at all to do with Caleb. I know you probably don’t believe that, but it’s true.”

“You’re sure of that?” he asked, clearly disappointed.

“Afraid so.” She looked into his eyes. “I wish it were otherwise. I really do. This situation with Caleb would be a lot easier if I were falling madly in love with you.”

“You’re positive there’s no chance of that?” he asked.

“I’m sorry,” she said again.

He shrugged. “Getting rejected is not going to stop me from worrying about you, you know.”

“You don’t need to worry. I know exactly who Caleb is. He won’t get a second chance to break my heart.”

Dillon smiled at that. “Tough talk, Jenny, but something tells me it’s way too late. Despite everything, it’s evident to me that he already has a pretty solid grip on your heart again.”

Jenny knew she could deny it all she wanted, but the sad truth was that he might be right. That didn’t mean she had to listen to her heart, not when she knew so well how much pain could follow.

* * *

Dusk was falling when Jake and the rest of the extended O’Brien clan left Caleb alone on the porch to await Jenny’s arrival. He’d settled into an old swing hanging from the ceiling, the control for the lights in his hand. For now, though, the yard was in shadowy darkness. Bree had called fifteen minutes earlier to alert him that Jenny was leaving the theater and heading for the house.

“She was a little peeved that you never came back this afternoon, in case you’re interested,” Bree said. “I think she was wondering what you were up to. Jake says the yard looks amazing.”

“He’s the expert,” Caleb said. “Please tell him again how grateful I am for the help.”

“Will do. Enjoy the evening.”

He set the swing in motion as he waited, his nerves jittery as he anticipated Jenny’s reaction to the surprise. When her car turned the corner at the end of the block, Caleb sat up a little straighter. He watched as she hesitated at the end of the driveway when she saw his truck parked there. He could imagine her drawing in a deep breath, then deciding not to let his presence chase her off.

It still took a few minutes, though, before she finally cut the engine and stepped out of the car.

“Caleb, what are you doing here?” she asked as she closed the car door.

“Just a few odds and ends,” he called back, then hit the switch.

Lights came on everywhere. White lights wound through the trees. Colored lights outlined the house. Spotlights shone on the figures in the yard, at least on those that weren’t lit up themselves.

“Oh, my heaven,” she said, her hand over her mouth, her expression stunned as she stood at the edge of the driveway. “What have you done?”

He flipped a second switch and the train whistle blew. It chugged around the yard, then stopped in front of her, giving her a clear view of Santa in the caboose.

“Jake and Thomas seemed to think this is pretty close to the one you loved so much,” he said, stepping off the porch and crossing to where she seemed to be rooted in place.

Jenny turned to him, her eyes shining with unshed tears. “You found another train,” she whispered.

“Is it okay?”

In response, she threw her arms around him and kissed him squarely on the mouth, her face damp with tears. “It’s the most perfect, the most amazing thing anyone has ever done for me,” she said. “I can’t believe you went to all this trouble. Where did you find the train? When?”

“I spotted it last night and managed to steer you to another part of the store before you got a glimpse of it,” he said, one arm holding her snugly against him. “After you went to bed, I went back to get it.”

The twinkling lights in the yard were reflected in her eyes. “You can’t possibly have done all this yourself in one afternoon,” she said.

“I had help,” he confirmed. “Bree rallied the troops.”

Jenny’s expression turned incredulous. “She called Jake?”

“And Mick, Thomas, Mack and Connor and a slew of others,” he added. “We’ve had quite an afternoon. Ate a whole lot of barbecue and drank a whole lot of soda.”

She regarded him with amusement. “And now you have the whole O’Brien fraternity on your side,” she guessed.

“Well, the train seemed to make an impression on your uncle, that’s for sure, but believe me, I have been duly warned that I am not to hurt you ever again. The entire contingent, led by Mick, is probably lurking in the bushes right now to be sure that you’re fully in control of the situation.”

She sighed as she leaned into him. “I want to be in control,” she said wistfully. Then she met his gaze. “But you seem to have a knack for taking my breath away, Caleb Green. It’s really annoying under the circumstances.”

He couldn’t seem to stop himself from smiling. “So you like the surprise?”

“I love the surprise,” she said. “And if I weren’t trying so darn hard to hang onto my last shred of sanity, you’d be getting very lucky about now.”

“Sanity’s overrated,” he suggested, holding her close.

“It probably is,” she agreed. “But I have to, Caleb. I can’t take another chance. Not yet.”

“I get that,” he told her. “I really do. I have to earn your trust again, Jenny. I understand that.”

“Just so you know, though, this...” She gestured around at the colorful display of lights. “It goes a long way toward telling me how you feel.”

“More effective than a kiss?” he wondered, thinking he might not be able to survive much longer if he couldn’t capture her mouth beneath his.

“Much more,” she said, then smiled. “But one little kiss might not be entirely out of order.”

She didn’t have to say it twice. Caleb lowered his head and touched his lips to hers, savoring the sweet surrender.

And for the first time since his life had fallen apart by his own doing, it suddenly felt as if it might be on its way to being right again.

* * *

When Jenny finally made herself step away from Caleb, she was trembling from the inside out. There was nothing she wanted more desperately than to take his hand, lead him upstairs to that king-size bed and make love with him again.

Instead, she gave his hand a squeeze and said only, “How do you feel about cold pizza? There’s a large one in the front seat of the car.”

Even inviting him inside for warmed-up pizza was a risk, but she couldn’t bear the thought of sending him away after what he’d done today just to make her happy.

“You sure about that?” he asked, his expression knowing. “It’s not far from the kitchen to your bed.”

“Far enough,” she said with determination. Her emotions might be out of control, but she was made of sterner stuff.

“Okay, then. Pizza sounds good. I’ll grab it. You go on inside and turn on the oven.”

“There’s a bag with paper plates and napkins in there, too,” she called after him.

“Got it,” he said.

On her way to the kitchen, she tossed her coat at the foot of the stairs, then deliberately turned on every light in her path in the hope that all that brightness would keep both of them from getting any romantic notions.

She flipped on the oven, then spotted plastic cups on the counter along with a few unopened bottles of soda. Her hands shook as she put ice into the cups, then poured the drinks. By the time Caleb joined her, she was convinced her nerves were under control, but one glance into his eyes told her otherwise. She didn’t give two hoots about soda or pizza. She wanted him.

But she wasn’t going to give in, she told herself staunchly. She just had to keep remembering all those lectures she’d been giving herself, all those claims she’d made to Dillon. She needed to remember every heartbreaking second of Caleb’s betrayal.

Suddenly she realized that Caleb was regarding her with amusement. “What?” she demanded.

“Did you win the struggle just then?” he asked. “Or did I?”

She frowned at his conviction that he knew what had been going on in her head. “You have no idea what you’re talking about,” she said. “I was just trying to figure out where we were going to eat, since we don’t have a table.”

“If you say so,” he replied, clearly unconvinced. “I have a blanket in the truck. Why don’t I grab that, make a fire, and we can eat in the living room?”

So much for avoiding a romantic ambiance, Jenny thought, remembering a few too many occasions when lovemaking had followed a meal in just such a setting back in Nashville. She couldn’t let him see that the notion rattled her, though.

“Sure,” she said breezily. “Sounds perfect.”

But a few minutes later when she walked in the living room with the pizza and found the atmosphere every bit as romantic as she’d feared, her heart stuttered. This was a bad idea, she told herself, even as she handed Caleb the hot pizza and settled beside him in front of the fire.

Or maybe it was the best idea either of them had had in months.

Chapter Nine

“H
ow’d the work go this afternoon?” Caleb asked Jenny as they finished up their pizza in front of the fire. He’d picked the topic mostly to distract himself from the way the firelight played over her skin and danced in her eyes. He was starting to want her way too much.

“It would have gone better if you’d been around to run the lyrics with me,” she told him, as if he were the one who’d run off and cut the session short.

He smiled but didn’t call her on it. “Since when do you really want my input at this stage? You mostly grumble that I’m messing with your creative process.”

“Okay, that’s true,” she conceded. “But I couldn’t seem to get focused. I really should have insisted you come back after lunch. After all, this show’s success depends as much on you as it does on me.”

He had a hunch her irritation had nothing to do with him or his failure to return to the theater earlier. “What’s this attitude really about, Jenny? Didn’t lunch with the ex go the way you wanted it to?”

“Lunch with Dillon was just fine,” she said a little too quickly.

“But he was unhappy to discover I was hanging around, wasn’t he?” he asked, taking a certain amount of masculine pleasure in that. How could he not? Dillon’s mere existence made him crazy. Why shouldn’t he return the favor?

“It’s not up to him to approve or disapprove,” Jenny responded.

“That doesn’t mean he’s happy about it,” Caleb told her. “Can’t say that I blame him. I’m not overjoyed about bumping into him at the theater all the time, either.” When she would have snapped back a retort, he held up a hand. “Not that I have any right to complain.”

“No, you don’t. And how many times have you actually bumped into him there, anyway? He’s only been by twice, and the first time...” Her voice trailed off and her eyes widened. “You were there that day, too?”

“I was.”

“And what? You stood outside the door and eavesdropped on a private conversation?”

“I overheard enough to figure out who he was, then I left,” he replied.

“How discreet of you.”

He smiled at her annoyance. “I thought so.” He hesitated, then asked, “How did the two of you leave things? Again, not that it’s any of my business.”

“It’s not your business,” she agreed, “but if you must know, I told him that nothing’s going to happen between us again, that I think of him as a friend.” She leveled a determined look into his eyes. “I’m not interested in a relationship with anyone at the moment. I’ve had enough drama to last a lifetime.”

Caleb shuddered at the firm declaration, empathizing with Dillon for being blown off so emphatically. “That must have stung,” he said, as if he didn’t know perfectly well that she’d intended the same message for him.

“I also told him nothing was going to happen with you again, either,” she said, intent on clarifying the point he’d deliberately ignored. “You can wipe that smug look off your face. You were behind all the drama, so I’m definitely immune to you.”

He laughed. “Here’s the difference, sweetheart. He probably took you at your word. I know for a fact you’re just saying that because you know we’re going to get back together eventually and you’re hoping to postpone the inevitable.”

“Caleb, you don’t know everything,” she said, clearly frustrated by his refusal to take her seriously. “I said I’m immune and I meant it.”

“If you say so,” he agreed solemnly.

That said, he decided a timely retreat was in order and stood up, then gathered the pizza box, paper plates and cups. Jenny regarded him curiously.

“Since when do you clean up after a meal?”

“I’m trying to make a good impression, remember?” He winked at her. “See you tomorrow.”

Her expression faltered, proving that despite her very stern reminder about her lack of interest, she wasn’t half as certain about what she wanted as she claimed. “You’re leaving?”

“I am,” he said. “If I don’t, I can’t promise I won’t try something. Since you’re so sure that’s not what you want, it’s best if I go rather than proving you wrong.”

“As if you could,” she muttered.

Caleb gave her a long look. “Is that a challenge, Jennifer Louise? Do you want me to try?”

“Absolutely not,” she said at once, but there was no mistaking her disappointment. Acting and lying weren’t part of her skill set.

“Okay, then,” he said agreeably. “See you tomorrow.”

“It’s Sunday. We won’t be working,” she reminded him.

“I know. I’ll still see you,” he said, thinking of the invitation he had to join the family at Mick’s. Jenny apparently didn’t know about that. It was probably better that way. She might warn him off and he’d feel obligated to comply with her wishes.

He could feel her watching him as he walked away. Once he’d dumped the trash in the kitchen, he went back and found her still sitting where he’d left her, looking a little lost and a whole lot perplexed.

“Something wrong?”

She glanced up at him. “You’re a very confusing man, Caleb.”

He laughed. “I’ll consider that progress, Jen. It’s much better than anything you were saying about me as recently as last week.”

And if he had his way, she’d have reasons to sing his praises in the not-too-distant future.

* * *

A family dinner at Mick’s was an O’Brien Sunday tradition, one that Jenny had actually enjoyed when she and her mom had gone along with Jake and Bree. For an only child of a single mom, being around such a large, rambunctious family had given her a taste of a life she’d only dreamed about. Even now she saw the irony of not fully embracing the chance to be part of this one once it had become a reality. But when her mom and Thomas had gotten together, it had felt weird.

Today, unfortunately, was no different. She still felt like an outsider. With children running around underfoot and the kitchen overloaded with too many cooks, Jenny grabbed her jacket and escaped to the porch where she could stare out at the bay and think about something besides family dynamics. Instead, she pondered the odd note on which she and Caleb had parted the night before.

Sadly, after a half hour of grappling with the possible reasons for his unexpected departure, she was no closer to figuring out what he was up to or why she wasn’t as immune to him as she’d imagined herself to be. She told herself that the time in this serene setting on a surprisingly mild day might be better spent trying to work out the troubling second verse of the song Bree wanted to end the first act of the play.

She ran out to her car, grabbed her guitar and settled again in the rocker. Unfortunately the instant she’d strummed the first few notes, she glanced up and into Caleb’s dark brown eyes. A shudder swept over her that had nothing to do with the chill in the air.

“You!” she said, startled. How in heaven’s name had he wangled an invitation to a family dinner?

He didn’t seem unduly bothered by the lack of warmth in her voice. “Such a lovely welcome!”

She sighed. “Sorry. My manners seem to desert me when I’m caught off guard. I’m guessing Bree invited you. She has a habit of taking in strays, even if nobody wants them around.”

Caleb only smiled at the intended barb. “She did.”

“And it didn’t occur to you that she was only being polite?”

“Of course it did, but since you and I seem to be getting along okay these days, I figured you wouldn’t object to my turning up. Is it a problem?”

“Of course not,” she said. “Why didn’t you say anything last night?”

“I thought it might be more fun to take you by surprise.”

She knew better. “You thought I’d tell you to stay away, didn’t you?”

He shrugged. “That was always a possibility and, as I told you the other day, I always wondered about this family you were trying so hard to leave behind. I wanted to come today.”

“A lot of them are going to hate you on principle,” she commented, taking a little too much delight in that. She could recall the last time Bree had invited an outsider, a former lover who’d come to town to win her back. The entire family had been stunned. Jenny’s uncle had walked out in a fit of jealous rage. It had taken days for the uproar to die down. Today promised to have a similar outcome. Amazingly, Caleb didn’t seem concerned.

“I’m pretty sure I won over most of the men yesterday,” he told her.

“That still leaves the women,” she reminded him. “We have longer memories, and we’re not all bound by some kind of testosterone oath.”

“I can take it,” he assured her.

“Really?” she asked skeptically. “You used to thrive on adulation, especially of the female variety.”

“Still do, but I’m not worthy of much of that these days, especially when it comes to folks who care about you. I have a lot of work to do to earn that back.”

She was stunned by his candor. It demonstrated a surprisingly new level of self-awareness. “Wow, if you truly believe that—”

“I do.”

She met his gaze for the first time, studying the face that she’d once known so well. “I want to believe you’ve really changed, Caleb. For your sake. That self-destructive path you were on was going to ruin you, right along with your career.”

“No doubt about it,” he agreed. “If I learned nothing else in rehab, at least I figured out just how close I’d come to hitting bottom. I imagine I’ll stumble from time to time, but I
have
changed, Jenny. You can count on that. I will never hurt you again.”

“No, you won’t,” she said quietly. “I won’t let you get close enough to hurt me.”

“So you keep saying.” A smile tugged at the corners of his sensual mouth. “I guess we’ll see about that.”

Just then the front door opened and Carrie and Caitlyn, Abby’s teenage twins, peered out at them.

“Oh, my God!” Carrie exclaimed. “It really is him. I didn’t believe Aunt Jess when she told us that Caleb was actually here at Grandpa Mick’s.”

While Carrie appeared to be awed by his presence, Caitlyn’s expression was indignant. “Jenny, how can you even stand to look at that man after what he did to you?” She whirled on her twin. “And you, get over the starry-eyed, hero-worship thing. He might be the hottest thing in country music since Tim McGraw or Kenny Chesney, but you know he’s a creep.”

Despite her own misgivings about the situation, Jenny stepped in.

“It’s okay, Caitlyn. Caleb’s not here because of me. Your Aunt Bree asked him to perform a couple of songs in the play. You know how persuasive she can be.”

“Well, I can’t imagine what she was thinking,” Caitlyn said. “Did she invite him here today, too?”

“Of course she did, you ninny,” Carrie said. “Remember that guy from Chicago? She hated his guts, but she asked him to come to Thanksgiving dinner. Unlike you, Aunt Bree doesn’t hold grudges.”

Jenny glanced at Caleb and noted that he seemed more amused than distraught by the debate over his presence. “Caleb, I want you to meet Carrie and Caitlyn. Their mom’s an O’Brien. Abby. She’s bound to be inside somewhere.”

“Twins?” he guessed.

“Yes, but we’re nothing alike,” Caitlyn was quick to declare.

“Are you really going to be in the Christmas play?” Carrie asked Caleb.

“I’ve agreed to take a small part,” he said. “I’ll be singing a couple of Jenny’s songs.”

“I told you we should be in the play,” Carrie said to her sister. “It would be awesome to tell the kids at school we were onstage with Caleb Green. They would totally freak out.”

“And I told you to go ahead,” Caitlyn reminded her. “I have too much studying to do.”

Carrie rolled her eyes. “She could make straight A’s without cracking a book. She’ll probably graduate from college in three years instead of four.”

“While you’ll drag it out as long as possible because you like the parties,” Caitlyn countered.

Jenny laughed, but Carrie didn’t even bother trying to deny it.

“So what if I want to meet someone and get married?” Carrie said. “That’s what you’re supposed to do in college. Half the seniors in our sorority are already engaged and planning June weddings.”

“If Mom heard you say that, she’d have a heart attack,” Caitlyn responded.

“Mom’s been married twice,” Carrie countered.

“But she has a great job and is totally capable of being an independent woman. That’s what she wants for us, to be able to stand on our own two feet. You’ll be happy to marry some rich guy and let him pay the bills.”

Carrie shrugged, clearly unoffended. “There could be worse things.”

“Like having no job skills when he divorces you,” Caitlyn suggested.

It was obviously a long-running discussion between the two young women. Jenny dared to step in. “For whatever it’s worth, I’m with your mom,” she said.

“So am I,” Caleb added, drawing a shocked look from Carrie and the first approving one of the encounter from Caitlyn.

“People should always know who they are and what they’re capable of accomplishing before they get into a relationship,” Caleb said. “You don’t want to live in someone else’s shadow.”

“Exactly,” Caitlyn responded. She hesitated, then glanced at Jenny. “Is that how it was with you two?”

“Jenny was already successful when we met,” Caleb said before Jenny could try to explain the complexities of their relationship, probably in more detail than either girl needed to hear.

“But you took her talent to another level when you started collaborating,” Carrie said, her gaze on Caleb. “Isn’t that true?”

It was Jenny who answered. “Yes,” she said.

“But she would have done incredible work even if I’d never come along,” Caleb insisted.

“But together you were magic,” Carrie said dreamily.

Jenny bit back a sigh. Most of the time they had been.

Carrie looked from Jenny to Caleb and back again, then said softly, “I hope you will be again. I bet this play will rock because of the two of you. Come on, Caitlyn. We should leave them alone.”

Caitlyn rolled her eyes. “Now you’re Miss Sensitivity.” She glanced worriedly at Jenny. “Do you want us to go?”

“Why don’t we all go inside?” Jenny suggested. “Dinner’s bound to be ready soon.”

With any luck, she could find a place at the table far, far away from Caleb. Unfortunately, steering clear of all the likely matchmakers was going to be more difficult.