Clarity 2 (3 page)

He lowers his voice to a deathly whisper as he lifts a hand to cup my cheek. “If you tell anyone
anything
about what happened three years ago—or if you do
anything
to jeopardize my marriage to your sister—I will kill Carmen. I will put a bullet in your sister’s head. I will put a bullet in your sister’s chest. And then I’ll shoot myself. I love your sister more than I’ve ever loved another human being. If you take that away from me—if you take that away from
us
—you might as well be killing us both.”

All the energy drains from my body.
I am defeated.

“Do you understand me?” he demands, shoving the gun forward painfully so that it digs into my chest and pushes me slightly off balance. “
If you don’t keep your mouth shut, I’ll kill Carmen. Why are you just standing there? Can you hear me? Nod if you understand.”

Very slowly, and with great effort, I force myself to nod.

“
Great. But don’t worry,” he says gently, removing the gun from my chest and returning it to his blazer. “There’s no need to be jealous. I still have plenty of love to give to you.”

“Go to hell,” I whisper.

He laughs and grasps the back of my head, leaning down to force a kiss against my lips.

I am stupefied and speechless by his gall. Thankfully,
he doesn’t try to do more than this, because I no longer have the strength to fight. I feel like the blood has left my veins and been replaced by empty air. I won’t risk my sister’s life, and he must know that. He has won. When he moves away, I hear him wiping his mouth with his sleeve to remove any telltale traces of lipstick. For a brief moment, a spark of fury fills me with fire. I consider tackling him and trying to steal the gun away from him—maybe I could shoot
him
in the chest. But the thought disappears as soon as it comes. Even if my limbs didn’t feel lifeless and weak, I am not sure I could be capable of such cruelty. I am not even sure if he deserves such treatment. After all—he did not take my life. It would be unfair to take his.

“It’s been a pleasure catching up with you,” Grayson says as he walks to the library doors. “But I’ve got to get back to my wedding. Haven’t you heard? It’s the most important day of my life.”
He pushes open the sliding doors and moves back into the foyer. There are joyous sounds of welcoming as the other guests greet him with good cheer and claps on the back.

I am left standing alone and
staring into my familiar nothingness.

“Here she is! I’ve found her!” announces a female voice loudly. I recognize it as Carmen’s bridesmaid Sabrina. She rushes into the library and grabs my arm. “Where have you been? You missed the photos!”

I am still slightly in a daze as I allow her to pull me out into the cacophony of the crowd.

“Oh, Helen,” Carmen says in disappointment. “You forgot your shoes in my bedroom.
I’ve been looking for you. I can’t believe you’re walking around barefoot when all the guests are here. Stop being ridiculous.”

I feel a pair of high-heeled shoes thrust against my chest, and I lift my arms to grasp them. The sharp heels poking into my skin do not bother me nearly as much as the
cold metal cylinder just did.

“They’re such lovely shoes,” Sabrina says with a sigh. “Most women make their bridesmaids look
hideous, but Carmen really picked out exquisite clothes for us. It’s too bad you can’t see the shoes, Helen.”

I can hardly be bothered to care, but I try to force myself to go through the motions. Skimming
my fingers over the satiny shoes, I feel some kind of jeweled embellishment on the front. They have a peep toe and a small kitten heel. I don’t know why I bothered to examine the shoes, because I can’t even try to make my face seem interested.

“Put them on!” Carmen urges.
“Today, you are merely one of my decorations. You have to dress up exactly as the bride wishes, and I am
not
doing a barefoot-on-the-beach style wedding.”

The excitement in her voice makes me feel ill. All
I can think about is the sensation of the gun nozzle pressed against my chest.
If you don’t keep your mouth shut, I’ll kill Carmen.
How can she be so happy, when just a few minutes before, her fiancé threatened to kill her? She is so innocent—and there is nothing I can do to inform her. My trump card failed. I have no other ideas. Unless I can think of something really ingenious, it looks like Grayson is going to get his way.

“Put on the shoes, Helen,” Carmen commands in an annoyed voice.

“Fine,” I say miserably. I allow both of the shoes to clatter from my arms to the ground. I then use my toe to poke around, searching for the entrance to the footwear. As I do this, I try to maintain my balance on one foot, but I’m sure I look wobbly and pathetic—which is precisely the way I feel. When I finally discover a shoe and try to insert my foot, of course, it happens to be the wrong shoe. I utter a very unladylike curse.

“Allow me to help you with that,” says a deep male voice. I am not sure who it is, but I am comforted by the fact that it is not Grayson. At this moment, any other man is a potential ally. I can feel that he has crouched down before me, for he gently takes my wrist and positions it on his shoulder so that I hav
e some support. I don’t even have the energy to protest, for I feel that I might actually fall over without his assistance. I am so discombobulated. His hand carefully encircles my foot and guides it into the correct high-heeled shoe. I am expecting him to immediately release me and disappear, but he holds my foot there for a moment, until I feel steady again. After a second, he picks up the other shoe and helps me place my second foot into the encasement.

“Thank you,”
I whisper, pleasantly surprised by the tenderness of his touch.

“Not a problem,” he says
kindly.

His voice is somehow calming to me. There are dozens of voices all around me in the crowded foyer, but his is soft and serene. When he speaks, I feel like I’ve dis
covered the solitary safe place in the middle of a raging storm. There is shelter and protection in his quiet strength.

“Helen?
What’s wrong?” he asks me with concern. He reaches up to clasp my hand as it rests on his shoulder. “You’re so pale—like you’ve seen a ghost.”

I am suddenly
even more confused. First of all, I am stricken by the fact that I am supposed to know this man. Is he one of our family members? Another distant cousin? I search my memory for his voice, but I am drawing a blank. Second of all, how does he know me so well? How can he see that I am pale and shaken, while my own sister is oblivious to this?

“Whoa,”
Carmen says with a strange tone in her voice. “Who’s Prince Charming over here with the glass slippers?”

The man on the ground laughs lightly. He removes my hand from his shoulder as he rises to his feet. “That’s right. We haven’t been introduced.
Helen, will you do the honors?”

I am worried that my face betrays how clueless I am. Luckily, I am saved by my father’s booming voice.

“Ladies! How are we all doing over here?” my father asks happily. “I think it was a splendid idea to serve cocktails to the guests before the wedding, Carmen. Everyone is in such good spirits—pardon the pun!”

“Oh, Dad,” Carmen says with a giggle. “How much have you had to drink?”

“Just enough, darling. Just enough.”

There is a twinkle in his tone, as though he might be winking at my sister
. His voice makes me feel much better, too. I wish I could take him aside and tell him what I know, but I can no longer try to save the day with the grave threat looming over my head.

“Oh, there you are,
my good fellow!” my father says, and his voice is directed at the person standing next to me—the man who helped with my shoes. “I just ran into this fine gentleman a few minutes ago. Imagine my surprise when he introduced himself as my daughter’s boyfriend!”

For a moment, I am
bewildered. Carmen has a boyfriend? In addition to Grayson? Does Grayson know about this? I immediately start to hope that there’s a chance for the wedding to be halted by other complications. My mind runs away with me, and I imagine a brave prince coming to the rescue and beating the shit out of Grayson.

“Oh my god,” Carmen says in astonishment. “
This
is Liam?
This
is Helen’s boyfriend?”

I am stunned by this information and deeply embarrassed that I
forgot
the voice of my supposed suitor. I am shocked that he is here at all, considering I told him not to come.

“That’s right,” Liam says, placing a hand affectionately on my back. “We’ve only been dating for a year, but it’s been the best year of my life.
Helen is an incredible woman.”

The palm of his hand is warm
against my spine, and I can feel my cheeks growing red. This is so absurd and embarrassing. I can’t remember why I decided to do this. Now, after all that’s happened, it feels so pointless and bizarre that I ever asked Liam to be my fake date to this wedding. How stupid was that? Why did I even care about such trivial bullshit? My sister’s life is on the line, and I feel like a fool. I can’t believe I thought it would be fun. Still... I can’t help but be glad that Liam is here. His presence is somehow reassuring.

“
Holy shit!” Carmen exclaims in amazement. “Helen, you didn’t tell me that he’s gorgeous!”

“Yeah,” Sabrina adds solemnly. “Wow.”

I shrug to hide my mortification and annoyance. “How could I have told you that? I have no idea what he looks like.”

“Well, you could have told me more about what he
feels
like,” Carmen says with an audacious giggle.

“Oh my god,” I mutter softly, turning to Liam. “I’m so sorry about this.”

“It’s quite alright,” he says with amusement.

Sabrina clucks her tongue in disapproval. “Helen, didn’t you know you that you’re not supposed to bring a man to the wedding who’s more handsome than the groom? It’s bad etiquette!”

“Uhh.” I don’t know how to respond to their flattery, and my cheeks flush even darker. I’m not sure whether I’m more embarrassed at being the center of attention, at the fact that dating Liam is a lie, or at the fact that it is now confirmed that he’s incredibly attractive, which makes me feel a little uneasy. If I was going to create a convincing lie, I probably should have chosen someone plain and forgettable, who was a little more in my league.

“Alright, children. That’s enough of teasing poor Helen,” my father says with a laugh. “She’s red as a beet! Don’t we have a wedding to get started? It’s about ten minutes to show time!
Grayson’s standing over there and looking very impatient.”

“Oh, let him wait,” Carmen says flippantly. “He’s been pressuring me to marry him for years. I’m sure he can handle another ten minutes of waiting.
”

“
That’s your fiancé?” Liam asks. “He seems a bit... angry.”

“No, no,” my father answers. “I’m sure it’s just the wedding-day
pressure getting to him. It’s a lot of stress. I can assure you that Grayson is the nicest guy in the world.”

I can’t keep a small grunt of derision from leaving my throat. It goes undetected by everyone around
me, except for Liam. His hand on my back moves up and down in a soothing manner. I am surprised at how attentive and intuitive he is.

“Well, I suppose we might as well start getting ready,” Carmen grumbles. “Let’s usher everyone to their seats.”

A moment later, Carmen, Sabrina, and my father are gone. The wedding is about to begin, and it will proceed as planned. I have failed in trying to stop it. Unless...

“
Hey. What’s wrong?” Liam asks me again. “Come on, Helen. Talk to me. There’s this look on your face, like you just stepped on a landmine.”

“I did,” I
say softly. Then I turn to him with a frown. “What are you doing here anyway? I told you not to come.”

“You sounded distraught,” he tells me.
“I don’t know—I was worried. What’s the matter? Something is bothering you; I can see that. When I walked in, you were as white as death.”

“Liam,” I
say quietly, moving close to him. My eyebrows knit together in consternation. “Thank you for coming. I just...”

A passionate
female voice interrupts me. “Hellie! Can I speak to you in private for a moment?”

“Carm?” I say in surprise. “
Uh, sure.”

“I hope you don’
t mind if I steal her, Liam.” Carmen says this as she slips her hand on my arm, already prepared to drag me away. I am a bit disappointed at the interruption, but I appreciate one final chance to talk to my sister.

“
Not a problem,” Liam says. “I think I see someone I know—Dr. Leslie Howard. I’ll go chat with her in the meantime.”

“Great!” Carmen
chimes in as she leads me back into the privacy of the library.

I am nervous that
Grayson might be suspicious of me speaking to Carmen alone—if he can see us. And I’m sure he’s keeping an eye on me. Nonetheless, I can’t waste this opportunity to tell her.
Should
I tell her? Is it worth the risk? I am startled out of my thoughts when Carmen pulls me into a hug.

“
I just wanted to congratulate you, Helen. I know we were joking around about Liam’s hotness a few minutes ago, but I wanted to be serious for a sec. He seems so sweet and loving. The way he helped you with your shoes! What a gentleman. You two seem perfect for each other, and I’m so happy for you. I think this is the first time I’ve ever seen you with a guy—the first time you ever brought someone home. Gosh... he’s your first
real
boyfriend!”