Clobbered by Camembert (30 page)

Why did I have a bad feeling about what he wanted to say?

“Sure,” I said, praying for nothing worse than a verbal slap to the wrists. I wouldn’t hold up well in jail.

We moved into the kitchen where a foursome of Providence Do-Gooders were sitting at the table playing bridge. Turquoise-studded hats adorned each of their heads. When I’d arrived earlier, Grandmère boasted that the group had grown to thirty members. They were scouring our county, as well as the surrounding counties, for goodwill projects. In unison, they said, “Hello, Chief.”

Urso returned the greeting. “Charlotte, are you warm enough to talk on the porch? The storm has passed.”

I grabbed one of my grandfather’s jackets from the mudroom beyond the kitchen and shrugged into it as we strolled outside. The sleeves hung over my hands, making me look like Dopey in
Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs
. Perfect. I could only hope Urso wouldn’t make the comparison.

I strolled across the patio and stopped at the edge of the grass. “Nice night.” The air was brisk but refreshing. A shiver curled up my spine. “Look at the moon.” A sliver of pale yellow hung in the black velvet sky, surrounded by shimmering, diamond-bright stars.

Urso touched my shoulder. I turned. In the soft light, his face looked as solemn as a judge’s. “Let me cut to the chase,” he said. “I’m not pleased with you.”

“I know. I—”

“Number one, you shouldn’t have gone to the inn with Rebecca.” Urso tucked his hat beneath his arm, then ticked off points on his thick fingertips. “Number two, you shouldn’t have walked down an abandoned alley.”

I had hardly considered the Winter Wonderland aisles alleys. Or abandoned.

“Number three, you should’ve called me right away, and not—”

“Whoa.” I held up a palm. “It’s not like I didn’t try to communicate, but you’ve been so busy.”

“The next time you impede an investigation, I’m putting you—”

“Impede?” Heat flushed my neck and cheeks. I jammed my hands onto my hips, a clumsy move with the extra length of sleeves. “I did not impede.”

“You allowed a suspect to trap you.”

“You never told me Chip was a suspect.”

“I didn’t trust him within a lick of his life. I never have, in all the years I’ve known him.”

“In the future, you might want to keep me in the loop.”

Urso craned his neck forward, reminding me of a buzzard inspecting a worm. I stood taller. I wouldn’t be cowed. Not by him. Not by anyone.

“Are you saying, in the future, you intend to nose around?” Urso asked.

“When I feel an injustice is being done, I’ll do everything I can to find a solution. Ipo Ho wasn’t guilty, but you were so focused on him as your suspect that Rebecca was sick with worry.” I shoved the jacket sleeve up my arm and thrust a finger at him. “Could you have figured out that a Camembert-style cheese container was used as a hockey puck without my input?”

He scrubbed his stubbly chin.

“No, you could not.” I stabbed my finger for emphasis. “So don’t tell me to—”

In one fell swoop, he grabbed my finger, pulled me to him, and kissed me. I didn’t kiss back. At least I didn’t think I did. How could I know? My body was vibrating with shock. A boiling heat brewed in my chest.

As fast as he zeroed in, Urso backed away. A stealth bomber couldn’t have been sneakier. “I apologize,” he said, a boyish flush suffusing his face. “I was just …” He whipped his hat from beneath his arm and beat it against his leg. “Earlier, when Jordan called, I was so worried for your safety that I couldn’t imagine another day going by without telling you how I feel about you.”

“But Jacky.”

“We broke up. She said she felt like a surrogate for someone else. She was right. She doesn’t know it’s you. It’s always been you.”

“But—”

A man cleared his throat. I whirled around.

“Am I interrupting?” Jordan loped up the driveway, hands tucked into the pockets of his distressed leather jacket. The glow of lamps along the driveway lit the underside of his chin and the planes of his cheeks. He looked incredibly handsome.

I glanced between Urso and Jordan, and my heart kicked into overdrive. “We were discussing the case,” I said.

“Ahhh.” Jordan drew near, lips pursed.

Did he know? Had he seen? I needn’t feel guilty. I hadn’t instigated the kiss.

“I heard Georgia Plachette is clearing out tonight,” he said to Urso. “She’s broken off all contracts and hostile negotiations. Oscar is leaving with her.” Oscar had roused from his coma at the same time Chip was holding me hostage.

“Who told you that?” Urso asked.

Jordan chuckled. “Tim got it from Luigi, who learned it from Arlo. I also heard that Barton and Emma Burrell are selling after all.”

I gaped. “But if Clydesdale Enterprises isn’t buying their place, who is?”

“Tallulah Barker. She wants to expand her animal rescue facility.”

“Well, I’ll be.” Urso ran his fingers along the brim of his hat. “Think I’ll get some dinner and share the news with the other folks.” He winked at me, and I felt a flicker of something skitter up the back of my neck. Attraction?
No, no, double
-
no
.

As he disappeared into the house, the Providence Do-Gooders offered another cheery, “Hello, Chief.”

The door banged closed, and all I could hear were the night creatures, which weren’t many in the winter. Their chirping waned. The evening grew silent.

I wrapped my arms around myself.

“Are you cold, sweetheart?” Jordan drew me into an embrace.

“Not when you hold me.” I craved the scent of him.

“You know, when Chip was in town, it made me realize something. I never want to take you for granted.”

A warmth shot through me. I felt heady with all the male attention. “And now you’re going to tell me you adore me?” I teased.

“No.” He paused. A long moment passed. “I love you, Charlotte. I want to spend the rest of my life with you.”

Had I heard right? My knees went weak.

“Do you think you can see past my, um, situation with WITSEC? Will you—” He dropped to one knee, pulled a small black box from his pocket, and popped it open. A platinum diamond ring twinkled within the velvet folds. “Will you marry me?”

RECIPES

Cheese and Jam Button Cookie

1 cup white sugar

1 cup butter, softened

1 3-ounce package cream cheese, softened

½ teaspoon salt

½ teaspoon vanilla extract

1 egg yolk

2 ¼ cups flour

1 egg white

1 cup favorite jam

In large bowl, combine sugar, butter, cheese, salt, extract, and yolk. Beat until smooth. Stir in flour. Chill the dough for 4-8 hours or overnight.

Preheat oven to 375 degrees.

Roll the dough into a long tube shape. Cut the dough in slices. Lay on cookie sheet 1 inch apart. Press with spoon. Brush with slightly beaten egg white and add a dollop of your favorite jam.

Bake for 7-10 minutes until golden brown.

* * *

Gluten-Free Cheese and Jam Button Cookie

1 cup white sugar

1 cup butter, softened

1 3-ounce package cream cheese, softened

½ teaspoon salt

½ teaspoon gluten-free vanilla extract or vanillin

1 egg yolk

1 ¼ cups sweet rice flour

1 cup tapioca starch OR potato starch

1 teaspoon xanthan gum

1 egg white

1 cup favorite jam

In large bowl, combine sugar, butter, cheese, salt, extract, and yolk. Beat until smooth. Stir in sweet rice flour, tapioca starch, and xanthan gum. Chill the dough for 4-8 hours or overnight.

Preheat oven to 375 degrees.

Roll the dough into a long tube shape. Cut the dough in slices. Lay on cookie sheet 1 inch apart. Press with spoon. Brush with slightly beaten egg white and add a dollop of your favorite jam.

Bake for 7-10 minutes until golden brown.

* * *

Grilled Breakfast Sandwich

by Delilah

(MAKES ONE SANDWICH)

2 eggs

Dash of Tabasco

3 grinds of the peppermill

2 tablespoons butter

1 green onion, green ends only

2 slices white bread

2 slices (at least 1 ounce each
*
) Tomme Crayeuse cheese     (may substitute cream cheese or Brie)

First prepare the eggs. Crack the eggs into a bowl; whisk to blend. Add a dash of Tabasco and three grinds of the peppermill.

Heat sauté pan on medium high. Grease the pan with ½ tablespoon butter. Chop the green onion ends. Drop the onion ends into the heated butter. Cook for one minute. Add the whisked eggs. Reduce heat to simmer. Stir the eggs until cooked through.

Heat griddle to 400 degrees.

Butter the outsides of each slice of bread using the remaining butter.

Slice the cheese and set aside.

Set the bread, butter side down, on the griddle. Top each side with half of the cheese. Mound the cooked eggs on one side of the bread with cheese. Set the other side of bread with cheese on top. Cook for two to three minutes until the bread on the griddle is a medium brown. Using a spatula, flip the sandwich and cook another two to three minutes.

Pancakes with Gouda and Figs

(SERVES 2)

Pancake Mix [Use grandmother’s pancake mix recipe
*
see below]

Eggs

Milk

Oil

4 ounces Gouda cheese, cut into 12-16 very thin slices

4-6 figs, stems removed, and then sliced

Make the pancake mix according to directions (below).

Warm the maple syrup by heating a pot filled with water. Set the syrup carafe into the boiling water. Turn off the heat.

Heat griddle to 400 degrees. Make 16 pancakes. After flipping the pancakes, top each with a piece of Gouda cheese. Cook until the underside of the pancake is desired color of golden brown.

Set the pancakes on two plates. Top with sliced figs. Drizzle with warm maple syrup.

* * *

Grandmother’s Pancake Mix

1 ½ cups flour

3 ½ teaspoons baking powder

½ teaspoon salt

1 tablespoon sugar

1 ¼ cups milk

1 egg

4 tablespoons butter, melted

Mix together the milk, egg, salt, baking powder, sugar, and butter. Blend in the flour until smooth.

Heat a frying pan or griddle over medium heat. Pour about ¼ cup pancake mix, using large spoon or ladle, onto the griddle. Let pancake heat to warm brown and flip with a spatula. Brown the other side. Serve hot.

* * *

San Simon Frittata

4 eggs

½ cup Parmesan cheese, shredded

½ teaspoon salt

½ teaspoon white pepper

1 tablespoon plus 2 teaspoons of olive oil

1 turkey sausage, about 4 ounces, diced

2 teaspoons rosemary

¼ cup red onion, diced

¼ cup scallions, diced

½ cup chopped Roma tomatoes

3 ounces San Simon cheese, sliced [may substitute other     cow’s milk cheese]

Preheat oven on broil.

Mix eggs and Parmesan cheese, salt, and pepper in a bowl and set aside.

In 8-inch skillet, sauté 1 tablespoon of oil. Toss in diced turkey sausage and rosemary. Sauté on medium high for 3-4 minutes. Drain.

Wipe skillet. Add 1 teaspoon of oil. Toss in onion and scallions. Sauté on medium high for 3-4 minutes until tender.

Add turkey sausage and egg mixture.

Cook, using spatula to lift cooked edges and allow uncooked eggs to ooze underneath, 3-5 minutes.

In separate 8-inch skillet (that can be safely put into the oven), sauté 1 teaspoon of oil. Place hot-oiled skillet upside-down on top of egg mixture skillet. Flip. Cook eggs in new skillet for 2 more minutes.

Pour chopped Roma tomatoes in center of the frittata; spread to edges.

Arrange San Simon on top.

Broil frittata in oven for 3-5 minutes. (Be careful not to burn the cheese.)

Remove from oven (remembering to use a POTHOLDER for hot handle).

Slide frittata onto serving plate.

* * *

Sweet Potato–Nutmeg Quiche

(SERVES 4-6)

1 cup sweet potatoes (canned, or 2 sweet potatoes cooked     to tender*)

2 tablespoons brown sugar

1 teaspoon nutmeg, plus a dash

6 ounces (3⁄4
cup) whipping cream

2 eggs

1 pie shell (home baked or frozen)

4 ounces shredded Swiss cheese

Put cooled sweet potatoes in bowl.
*
Sprinkle with brown sugar and 1 teaspoon of nutmeg.

Mix in cream and eggs. Pour mixture into pie shell.

Sprinkle with Swiss cheese. Dash with more nutmeg.

Bake 35 minutes at 375 until quiche is firm and lightly brown on top.

* * *

Torpedo Sandwich

Urso’s favorite

(MAKES 2)

Torpedo-shaped rolls, 6
each

4 tablespoons mayonnaise (plain; not salad dressing style)

2 teaspoons Dijon mustard

2 teaspoons maple syrup

1 teaspoon ground pepper

1 teaspoon salt

2 green onions, white tips only (or scallions)

8 1-ounce slices maple-infused ham

8 1-ounce slices Jarlsburg cheese

Slice the torpedo-shaped rolls lengthwise.

In a bowl, combine the mayonnaise, mustard, syrup, pepper, salt, and green onion tips.

Slather each side of the torpedo-shaped rolls with the mayonnaise mixture. Top the bottom half with 4 slices of ham and 4 slices of cheese. (At this point, you might desire to heat the bottom half. Place under broiler for 2-3 minutes until cheese is bubbling.)

Place the top half on the sandwich and cut the roll on the diagonal.

Serve with crispy potato chips

*
More cheese may be added, to your liking. After all, it is a grilled cheese sandwich.

*
Note this recipe is not gluten-free. To make it gluten-free, substitute 1 ½ cups gluten-free flour of your choice and keep the rest of the ingredients the same.

*
To cook fresh sweet potatoes: Peel two sweet potatoes. Cut sweet potatoes into quarters. Fill a 6-quart pot three-quarters full of water. Bring to boiling. Set the sweet potatoes into the pot. Cook for 15-20 minutes, until a fork slips into the potatoes easily and comes out. Remove the potatoes and let cool. Mash for quiche.