Cocktails & Dreams (31 page)

Jena tossed her keys in the bowl on the table and then stretched as Nick shut the door. “I need a shower,” she muttered, lifting her hair off her neck. “Too much dancing. I swear, I’m gonna get this mop chopped off one day. Too hot.” She gathered her hair up and posed. “How do you think I’d look with Leisa hair?”

“Dead.”

She laughed and went into the kitchen, snagging a bottle of water out of the refrigerator and tossing one to Nick. “So…thoughts on the evening?”

Nick smiled and twisted the cap off his bottle. “It’s been good.” His smile faded as he thought about his father. “Mostly.”

Jena sighed and shook her head. “Is that what you’ve been brooding over tonight? Let’s get this over with, then.” She boosted herself up to sit on the counter and looked at him. “What do you want to know, Nicholas?”

“Apparently nothing you can answer,” he muttered, putting down his bottle and bracing his hands on the counter next to her as his shoulders slumped.

“Hey,” Jena protested. “That’s not fair!” She hesitated. “And not totally accurate. Dr. Call did volunteer a little information, though I didn’t ask. He just said that your dad was worried about you and called to talk. I swear, Nicholas, that’s all he said.”

“I thought you said your visit was work related.” He looked at his hands as they rested on the laminate.

Jena moved her hand to his arm. “It was. I met with Dr. Call to ask for his assurance that I could count on him being fair as far as my job and school, given his relationship with your dad. I wanted to know if I needed to transfer. That’s all.”

“You’d change schools and jobs if he said he couldn’t be objective?”

Her answer came quickly. “In a heartbeat. I’m not giving you up, Nicholas. I can’t.”

Nick couldn’t help smiling as he turned to face her. “Silly. Why didn’t you tell me this before?”

She relaxed. “You were so tired, and I didn’t want to worry you when there wasn’t anything to worry
about
.”

“So I guess I didn’t corner the market on thinking I know what’s best for someone else,” he observed. Jena looked down, and he raised her face to kiss her firmly. “Let me decide what I can handle, okay?” She nodded and rested her head against his chest.

“Maybe it’s time we all made these temporary sleeping arrangements that aren’t turning out to be temporary, permanent.” Nicholas repeated Conor’s words thoughtfully.

She froze and looked up, searching his eyes seriously. “Do you mean that?”

“Why not? I want you with me every morning and every night, and I’d bet Travis and Leisa feel the same. Not about you, of course.” Nick chuckled, feeling a little giddy from saying what he had been thinking for so long at last. “About each other.” Jena looked troubled, and he started to feel stupid. Talk about ruining a moment. Why the hell would she want to live with
his
crabby ass? He rubbed her back. “Forget I said anything. Everything is perfect just like it is, I swear.”

She traced the plane of his face with a single finger. “I’d never want you to go, Nicholas,” she said quietly. “Not ever. I want you to think about it and not do this on the spur of the moment. This can’t be a game. Or just…” She gestured to their bodies helplessly, flushing.

He kissed her fast and hard. “I thought we covered that a while ago. This is not just about sex,” he said when he drew back. As Jena’s mouth opened to reply, he covered her lips with his fingers. “We can talk about it tomorrow. No more drama tonight.”

“Nick…” Jena said around his hand, sounding troubled. “Shouldn’t we talk about—”

“Tomorrow.” He pulled her against him, laughing against her lips. “Now didn’t you say that you have a plan for the couch?” Towing her along with him, he rested in the corner of the couch with his arm stretched along the back. Toeing off his socks and shoes, he looked up at her expectantly.

She stood in front of him with a wry smile, unbuttoning her jeans and pulling the zipper down languidly. “I make all these plans to be serious, Nick…and then you
look
at me that way…” She shook her head, slowly pushing the denim off her hips. “You take my breath away.”

Nicholas watched the jeans drop to the floor as she shimmied out of them. She reached up to untie the halter, the fabric pulling taut against her breasts. “You do that to me every damned day, Jena,” he said softly, watching her nipples harden in the cool room. He shifted his hips uncomfortably and unbuttoned the top couple of buttons on his jeans, trying to reduce the pressure.

“Stop right there.” Jena swept her eyes over him, and then closed them for a minute. “I’ve been thinking about that since you sat there playing the guitar after Drunkolas night.” She opened her eyes and dropped the halter to the floor, stepping forward and sinking down next to the couch. Her hands trembled as she ran them across his stomach. “God, I’m glad Travis isn’t coming home,” she murmured.

Nicholas leaned forward and urged her onto his lap. “So am I.”

Flicking the center catch of her bra, Nicholas pushed it off her shoulders and filled his hands with her as he covered her chest with kisses. “Then again, maybe it would serve him right if
he
needed brain bleach.”

Warm and comfortable in her bed after a shower, Jena laid her head on Nick’s chest, her lips turning up into a smile. “Did you have fun tonight?” She drew lazy patterns in his chest hair with one finger.

“Are you fucking kidding me? My knees are still shaking.”

She slapped his chest. “Not just now, dork! The concert and everything.”

“Everything…” He considered. “I had a great time with the animals. I wasn’t so crazy about talking to my mom or hearing about my dad.” He rested his cheek on her head. “Being with you was the best part. Well, aside from your couch fantasy.” He hissed in pain as she playfully tugged at his chest hair. Jena sighed as she settled back against him, but Nick felt the slight tension in her body.

Thinking he knew what was bothering her, he stroked her hair. “As long as you want me, you’ve got me, Jena,” he said quietly. “I’m not going anywhere, and I’m not playing.” He tipped her face up with a finger. “It’s never just sex. I love you.” When he felt her relax, he knew he’d been correct. He snuggled her head under his chin and chuckled. “You’re probably going to get tired of me saying that.”

“Not possible.” Jena kissed his chest and turned on her side, wrapping his arm around her body as he turned to curl around her. “You have a whole life of saved up ‘I love yous’ to give away, and I want every damned one. I’m selfish like that.”

“S
TILL
C
ONSIDERING
L
IFE
W
ITH
N
ICK
in the love shack?”

Jena’s chair nearly skittered out from under her as Travis shook the back when he entered their office.

“Ass.” She snickered, pulling herself back to the center of the desk and spinning around to face him. “I could ask you the same thing, cowboy. Still considering having your own home on the range?”

Travis grinned, unwinding the scarf from around his neck and hanging it on top of the jacket he’d just put on the coatrack. He flopped in his chair and hung his head back.

“It would be fucking exhausting, if you want to know the truth. I’m trying to finish up the research on my thesis, plus honor the commitments I have to play before I buckle down for finals, and Leisa…” He shook his head slowly before snapping it up to give Jena a one-raised-eyebrow look. “Did you know she was so into morning sex? It wouldn’t be too bad, but do you know what time she gets up?”

“No and no. And those are things I could gladly go to my grave without knowing, thank you very much.”

Travis laughed and grabbed a chart. He glanced over at Jena. “What are you doing tonight? Spending time with the Stud?”

She sighed. “I wish. Late shift again. I don’t think we’ve been awake in the same room since the night after the concert.”

“Bet that was fun.” Travis waggled his eyebrows at her and laughed when she blushed. “Damn, Jen, I’m not
blind
. You were standing and groping right next to Leisa and me. I think I might have learned a thing or two.” He pulled the end of her braid as he stood and walked to the door. “Call Leisa. I have two more wrap-up gigs, and one is tonight. You should have a girls’ night—out or in.” He headed out the door, whistling.

After a moment’s quick consideration, Jena called Leisa and confirmed that she was up to a night out, as long as it didn’t go too late. Hurrying home after work to change into something club-appropriate, Jena grinned as she slid into the pink lacy underwear set that she’d pilfered from Nick’s dresser drawer weeks before, already anticipating the look on his face when she stripped off her clothes. Scrambling for her phone, she called him to be sure that he knew to return to her apartment that night, then texted Travis that he was staying with Leisa. Spotting the silk shirt she’d worn on New Year’s Eve at the back of her closet, Jena impulsively slid it on over her tank, slipped large silver hoops into her ears, and was just shoving her feet into heels when Leisa honked outside.

“So what’s the plan, woman?” Leisa asked, smiling at Jena fleetingly before looking into the mirror to apply a deep red lipstick.

Jena hesitated, realizing that she had no idea what the hot clubs were anymore. “I hadn’t thought that far.” She laughed in embarrassment.

Leisa pulled out into traffic, looking unconcerned. “Leave it to me. Wherever Travis’s band
doesn’t
play is probably our best bet for bad drinks, grabby men, and loud techno music…you know, a place where single people go,” she joked. Jena laughed and nodded.

Two hours later, her joke wasn’t quite so funny. At first it had been exciting to be one in a crowd again, dancing with Leisa and quaffing the free drinks being sent their way by various admirers. Leisa shed her inhibitions along with her severe jacket, ruffling her hair into a sexy tangle and barely remaining contained in a silk camisole that was never meant to be worn alone, laughing loudly and winking at the bartender. Her lush curves and Southern accent seemed to attract men like flies to honey…but then she had to dance, dragging Jena along for the ride. Jena found it hard to restrain her guffaws of laughter when Leisa went into her patented spasms on the dance floor; they were even harder to contain when Leisa wondered aloud why the men were drifting away from her. The urge to laugh ended then, as most of them then seemed to hang around Jena, apparently hoping that she might make a more acceptable dance partner. Or partner in
something
anyway.

After being towed backward by a meaty finger hooked through her belt loop, Jena had finally had enough of the peering and groping and noise, leading an agreeable Leisa to the car. They stopped at a tiny coffee house with comfortable sofas lining the walls and collapsed in relief.

“So what did you think of your night as a single woman?” Leisa asked, wincing as she kicked off her heels.

Jena did the same, smiling politely at the barista as she delivered their cappuccinos. As soon as the girl left, she grimaced. “I think we’re better off where Travis plays.” She took a sip of her coffee. “Better music.”

Leisa nodded sagely, sipping from her own cup. “Better drinks, too.” She sat calmly for a second before bursting into loud giggles. “Are you going to say it or should I? It sucked.”

“Didn’t it, though?” Jena smiled in relief at being able to admit she’d hated the evening. “I remembered it differently. Fun.”

“Nope,” Leisa said decidedly. “It was always that way. Our definition of ‘fun’ has just changed. It no longer includes cheap, watered-down alcohol.”

“Or Techno,” Jena added. “Though I can honestly say I
never
liked that much.”

“Not to mention strange hands on you—nice gut shot on that chunky playa, by the way.” Leisa grinned at the memory. “Swear to God, Jen, didn’t I just say the other day that I’m done with that shit?” She laid her head on the back of the sofa and sighed.

Jena smiled at the memory of that day. “My nomad…” she murmured, thinking of Nicholas for the hundredth time that night and fighting the urge to check if it was reasonably close to the time he’d be home. She closed her eyes and imagined being in his arms.

“Hey,” Leisa asked lazily, “did you—”

“Called Nick, texted Travis,” Jena answered automatically, smiling. She felt something cold whisper along her temple and opened her eyes quickly.

Leisa was smiling and holding out her key to Jena’s apartment. “Aren’t you tired of making sleeping arrangements? Let’s just make it official.”

Jena snagged the key out of Leisa’s hand. Nick had held a key to her apartment for a while, of course, but she understood the symbolism of Leisa handing this particular key over. “You’re not kidding?”

“Nope. I can admit when I’m wrong, and I admit I was wrong about you and Nick. He’s a good guy, Jena.” Leisa swallowed the rest of her coffee and glared down at her shoes. Sweeping them up in one hand, she held the other out to heave Jena from her cushioned prison. “It’s time to make my boyfriend forget all about the bar hos that follow him around like sheep.” She smiled and headed for the door. “Tell your nomad that he has a home.”

The thought ran round and round Jena’s head as they drove back to her apartment, and she found herself grateful that for once Leisa was content to sit in silence, aside from absently humming one of Travis’s songs. As happy as the part of Jena’s mind that was tired of uncertainty and longed to be settled with Nick was, there was another side that was wary of the violence and coldness of which Nicholas was capable, a side that feared loss, a side that hated to be wrong…that was there, too. When the headlights of Leisa’s Audi splashed across the wall of her apartment building, Jena still hadn’t decided whether to crow about the official Handing Over of the Key or whether to keep it to herself a little longer.

Waving to Leisa as she drove out of the parking lot, Jena’s heart gave a happy thump when she saw Nick’s car in Travis’s allotted space. That had to mean
something
, she thought, shoving the key into her front jeans pocket and hurrying up the stairs.

Nicholas had apparently just arrived home himself; he was slumped on the couch, head resting against the back when she opened door. He looked up at her and smiled, and her heart lurched again. Crooking a finger at her invitingly, he pulled the knot in his tie down with the other hand.

She leaned against the door as it snicked shut behind her, drinking him in. Even after nearly fifteen hours at the hospital, his charcoal gray suit was impeccable. Granted, he wore scrubs in the O/R for a large part of his day, but did he have an ironing fairy hidden in his locker? Shouldn’t he look a little ragged? Only his hair showed any mussing, and that only made him more attractive.

“How was the club?” he asked.

“Sucky, to use Leisa’s term. Dancing with my girl was fun, but I missed you.”

“Did you have to kill anyone for me?”

“No deaths, though I had to give one guy a shot to the gut, and Leisa thinks I turned his toe into hamburger with my bootheel.”

“That’s my girl.” Nicholas laughed, shifting under her steady gaze. “What?” he asked after a minute, looking down at his white shirt. “Did I get lunch on myself?”

Jena grinned. “Nope. Just ogling the fuckhawt doctor.”

Nicholas shook his head, shrugging out of his jacket and tossing it over the arm of the chair before rolling up his sleeves. “Are you ever coming over here?” He patted the cushion next to him.

She sank down against the warmth of his side as his fingers twined with hers on her thigh. She brushed a stray tendril of hair off his forehead. “Hard day?”

Nicholas shook his head. “Believe it or not, I think I might be getting used to this. A little.” He smiled and squeezed her hand, looking down at their fingers. “You know my aneurysm patient…Heather? She opened her eyes today.”

“Nicholas, that’s great!”

“Well…maybe,” he hedged. His frame was tense with emotion Jena could sense he was restraining, just below the surface. “She just looked at her fiancé a lot, and whispered to him once or twice. It might just be a fluke…” His face broke into a huge grin and he finally relaxed. “Yeah, it is great.”

Turning his face toward hers, Jena kissed him softly. “It’s okay to celebrate the little things, Wonder Doc. Sometimes they’re the best things of all. Like sitting here with you. Awake.”

“No kidding. This is like a dream.” They both laughed at the absurdity of Nick’s statement, and he kissed her slowly, tracing the shape of her face with his hand before leaning back again and guiding her head against his chest.

Jena listened to the slow, steady beating of his heart and his even breathing for a minute, relaxed and completely happy for the first time that night. She idly twisted his tie between her fingers, feeling the key biting into her thigh and niggling at her brain as she glanced at his face. She had information to impart, and the stress of not being sure of his reaction made her stomach clench.

“Travis got a new old patient today. Stefan re-injured his knee and has therapy again.”

Nicholas’s fingers briefly paused, but then continued curling a lock of her hair. “How did that go?” he asked mildly.

“As well as could be expected, I guess.” Jena looked up into his eyes. “He apologized. For following me and for that night.”

“Wow. I’d never expect that,” Nicholas said, wrapping his arms around her. “Maybe he’s not as bad as I thought.”

“Yeah. Can you resist trying to kill him if I have to work with him sometimes, now?” she teased, smiling in relief when Nick nodded.

“I think I can do that.” He drew back and eyed her carefully. “I recognize that outfit,” he said. He slid the navy shirt off one shoulder and caressed her skin with his fingertips. “I remember slipping this off you on New Year’s…”

Jena flicked a glance toward him. “Oh, you remember that
now
, do you?” she teased.

Nicholas covered his eyes with one hand theatrically, though she could still see his smile. “You’ll never let me live that down, will you?”

“Never,” Jena answered complacently, closing her eyes and sighing as his fingers slid beneath the strap of her tank. He shifted suddenly, so she was lying against the sofa cushions and not resting against his chest. Leaning closer, he gasped in mock disbelief.

“This is mine!” he said, pulling the pink lace strap of her bra from beneath the white tank. “I can’t believe you went drawer fishing!”

Jena grasped the front of his shirt and pulled him toward her for a rough kiss. “It would look mighty silly on you, Nicholas,” she teased as he rose back up, leaning on the hand that was next to her head. “Besides, it’s mine. But you knew that, didn’t you?”

Nicholas leaned forward slowly, stopping when their lips were a hairsbreadth apart. He slid light fingers under her shirt and against her trembling belly. “Yep, I knew that,” he whispered, moving back a tiny bit when she tried to touch his mouth with hers. He chuckled when she groaned. “Best trophy I’ve ever taken.” He came closer. “Best decision I ever made.”

Jena felt like her heart was going to fly out of her chest. “That wasn’t a choice, Nick. It was lots and lots of alcohol, combined with a happy accident,” she said, smiling.

“I don’t believe in accidents,” he replied decidedly. “Besides…” He smoothed her hair back from her face gently, his eyes warm. “I wasn’t talking about New Year’s. I was talking about the decision to chase you and not let you go when I caught you.” He closed the tiny fraction of space between them. His lips were warm and soft, and Jena felt the desire behind the gentleness, and her mind was made up.

She pulled the key from her pocket as he sank down to rest on his elbow, easing his body over hers and settling in. She dangled it in front of his face. “Guess what?”

Nicholas reached over and grasped it tightly. “No shit?” A grin slowly spread across his face. “Are we really doing this?”

Jena laughed. “Leisa’s exact words were, ‘Tell your nomad he has a home.’” Her smile faded and she ran her hand gently down his cheek. “Do you want a home with me?”

“More than anything.” His eyes were serious as he shoved the key deep in his pocket. “You can’t have this back.”

“I don’t want it back.” Jena searched her feelings and was relieved to find that there was no objection from any part of her mind.

Nicholas sat up, pulling her upright as well. He wrapped his arms around her and rested his forehead against hers. “This is real?” he murmured, almost like he was speaking to himself. “Are you scared?”

“Yep. Terrified. You?”

“Nope. I’m getting what I want.” He stroked her cheek with the back of his fingers, and Jena closed her eyes, trying to commit this moment, the feel of his skin against hers, to memory. “I love you,” he whispered, kissing her.