Come Back To Me (25 page)

After that incident, Cara concluded she should pull back a little, perhaps begin a gradual disengagement. In the dark, she could allow her doubts to surface. Micah Welsh was a complicated man. Perhaps it would be better if she knew how complicated, but Cara’s instincts told her not to question him. For one thing, she wasn’t certain how he’d react. For another, he’d been generous to a fault, with his time and his money. He’d provided her with everything a woman could ask for.

He’d provided her with a life. What difference did it make that it wasn’t her life? She was better off. Micah protected her. No one dared hurt her because they knew she belonged to him. Cara couldn’t even fault Micah as a lover. He was skilled, and Cara might have enjoyed herself if she wasn’t numb to his touch, to the touch of any man. But that fault lay with her, not him. She was the one who was deficient.

Where would she go if she left him, back to Iowa? Would she move in with her mother and Phil? Work as a waitress? Keep company with regret for the rest of her life? Grow old all alone? Cara shuddered at the thought. She’d be better off dead. It occurred to her that there was the very real possibility she wouldn’t be the one leaving. Micah might become bored with her. He’d created her with a casual snap of his fingers and he could destroy her just as easily. Cara’s heart began to pound in her chest as a wave of pure panic washed over her. She couldn’t bear to be alone in the dark with her thoughts.

“Micah,” she cried out, clutching at him. “Micah . . . Oh God Micah . . .”

“Wha-what-what is it?” Micah bolted upright. “What is it? Cara? What is it?

“Oh, God. Oh, God, Micah. Don’t leave me. Please, don’t leave me . . .”

∗    ∗    ∗

Micah might have been half-asleep, but Cara’s words registered. Yes. He rolled them around in his head, triumphant. This was the first time he’d ever seen Cara lose her composure. And it was because she loved him, because she didn’t want to lose him. He turned to her, gathering her in his arms. He could feel her heart pounding in her chest. She gasped for breath.

Micah laughed. He had her. By God, he had her!

“Don’t worry, darling, I’ll take care of you. You belong with me. You’re mine. I’ll never let you go. Never.”

He laid her down and fucked her, showing her just what he meant. He knew she loved him now, because she cried while he did it.

The next morning he flew with her to Vegas. They were married in a small chapel on the strip. The ceremony was witnessed by an Elvis impersonator and a drag queen. What did it matter? The marriage was just a formality to be gotten out of the way as quickly as possible. Within the hour they were back on a flight to Salt Lake City. Micah had called ahead to the restaurant in Park City to give Jerry the news. He told him he expected a wedding cake and plenty of iced champagne on their return. As usual, Jerry grumbled about the extra work, but nothing could dampen Micah’s mood. In a cheerful voice he told Jerry to go to hell. Now he could sell that damn townhouse and move her into the ranch. He wouldn’t have to worry about John or any other rat-faced son of a bitch sniffing around her. As far as the business went now wasn’t the time to think about it. Now was for celebrating his beautiful young wife.

∗    ∗    ∗

The deed was done. Once Cara had spoken with her mother, said the words aloud, the act became real. She was a married woman, Mrs. Micah Welsh. Even as she smiled at Micah sitting next to her on the plane, even as she reached for his hand, she felt herself retreat inside. Breaking down last night had been a terrible mistake, and now she’d compounded the mistake by marrying him. But she couldn’t let Micah know how she felt.

It will be all right,
she told herself.
Micah will manage everything and I can stop thinking. That is what I want, isn’t it?

Thanksgiving 1977,
New York City

J
ames laughed out loud. “You’ve got to be kidding. Cara? Married? If this is your idea of a joke, it’s not funny.”

“No Mack,” replied Will. “I’m not joking, and I don’t think it’s funny either. I spoke with her mom last week. Cara’s married, to some rich guy out in Park City, Utah. She just did it, in Vegas.”

James practically fell into a kitchen chair. He felt like someone had kicked him in the gut. The news had knocked the wind out of him. “It’s been nearly a year. It was just last Thanksgiving we were at my mother’s house, that we set the date. That she got pregnant with my child.”

“It’s not getting any easier, is it?” Will pulled out a chair and sat down across the table.

“Hell. No. Who did you say she married?”

“Some rich guy. Louise said he’s older, early forties maybe. Owns a couple of restaurants or something.”

“Has Louise met him?”

“No,” said Will. “She hasn’t even seen Cara since she moved out there. I got the impression Louise thinks the man’s, well, controlling, for lack of a better word.”

“What’s his name?”

“What difference does it make?”

“What’s his name?”

“Micah Welsh. Why?”

“So I’ll kill the right man.”

“Hold on, Mack, this was Cara’s decision. Nobody held a gun to her head.”

“The hell it was.” James growled as he rose from his chair, giving it a kick, sending it crashing to the floor with a loud bang.

“Hey!” Will jumped up. “Where are you going?”

“Utah.”

Will hurried to step in front of him, block his way to the door.

“Move out of the way, Will. Get out of my way.”

“No Mack. I can’t let you do this.”

“Get the fuck out of my way, Will!” James shouted at him, his right hand clenched into a fist.

“Six months ago I told you to go after her. Do you remember? I begged you to go after her before she did something stupid, something like this. You refused. Remember? You refused. And now you have no right to interfere. You have no right to go after another man’s wife. Do you hear me? It doesn’t matter that you love her. It doesn’t matter. She’s married Mack. She’s married, and there’s not a damn thing you can do about it.”

“Move away from the door, Will.”

“No, I won’t. Go sit your ass down and cool off. There’s nothing you can do, Mack. There’s not a damn thing you can do.”

James turned on his heel and strode to the closest window. It overlooked a busy street, but when he stared down he didn’t see a damn thing. Somehow he had imagined . . . James didn’t even know what he’d imagined. That Cara would come to her senses one day? That she’d come back to him? That some spring morning he’d open the door to his apartment and there she’d be, waiting for him? Her arms open wide, welcoming him?

He’d been a bloody fool. Will was right. He should have gone after her when he had the chance. He should have made her listen to him. He’d known, better than anyone, how fragile Cara was, how Ezra Payne had broken her. The only excuse James could come up with, and it was pretty meager, was that he’d been hurting too. He’d blamed himself for Ezra Payne as much as she’d blamed herself. He hadn’t been there when she’d needed him the most. He felt as responsible as Payne for her suffering.

James had been aware, even when he’d walked out of her hospital room, that Cara still loved him the exact same way he still loved her. But now, to hear that she’d married another man? James knew to the depths of his soul that another man would never make her happy. Another man could never take his place. Yet Will was right. He didn’t have a choice. He had to let her go. If it was possible, if he was ever going to find any happiness for himself, he needed to let Cara go for real this time.

How the hell am I going to do that?

February 1978

“G
et rid of him,” Welsh said. “I don’t want him around Cara. He talks too much and I’m sick of his whining.”

Jerry sighed. He’d seen this was coming. The kid was a royal pain in the ass. When Micah had called him up to his office, he’d been hoping it had to do with the raise he’d requested. No such luck.

Jerry didn’t mind playing the role of enforcer on occasion. He didn’t take it too seriously. He’d never caused anyone a permanent injury. As bouncer he’d tossed out drunks and he’d protected the girls in the back from abuse, unless the abuse came from Micah. There wasn’t much he could do about the stuff Micah dished out, except offer a shoulder to cry on and suggest that a girl find another job.

Micah had more or less left the girls alone since Cara showed up in Park City. Now she was the one Jerry worried about. He hadn’t noticed any obvious bruises, but if he knew Micah, it was only a matter of time. One day Cara would say no. Micah would show his true colors and blow his stack. Some of the girls could handle Micah, a couple even liked it. Jerry didn’t think Cara could survive him.

It was a dangerous thing, to care about the boss’s wife. Jerry was convinced Cara was more than she pretended to be, a whole lot more. He’d recognized it the first time he’d looked into her eyes. It seemed to him that something had happened to her and she was running from it. Whatever it was must have been pretty bad. She was a classy girl with an education. She was as smart as a whip and those eyes of hers missed nothing. In Jerry’s opinion, Micah underestimated her. Jerry figured that either Cara was a great actress or she was heavy into denial. She had to know Micah Welsh wasn’t on the up and up.

Jerry prided himself on his ability to read people. It was one of the reasons he was so valuable to Micah. Jerry could spot a cop a mile away. He could smell an alcoholic before a man even ordered a drink. He knew which patrons would be trouble before they lifted a finger. Jerry saw Micah Welsh for what he was—a cruel, heartless, son of a bitch, narcotics distributor who liked to beat on women.

He’d heard the rumors about his ex-wife, Dominique. How after one particularly rough night that landed her in the emergency room she’d threatened to rat Welsh out. Welsh sicced one of his goons on her and the man shredded her pretty face. After that, she’d agreed to a quiet divorce quick enough. Jerry hoped she’d at least gotten a big settlement, but he had his doubts.

Jerry had never laid a hand on a woman and he never would. That was where he drew the line. He wished he’d had an opportunity to warn Cara. Right before she’d left with Welsh for Los Angeles, she seemed to be pulling away. Jerry hoped she was reconsidering her situation and she’d take off before it was too late. But then she’d come back married to the bastard. Damn. If things went bad, Jerry could maybe help her disappear, if he could get to her in time, but that was about all he could do.

Welsh waited for an answer.

“I do it my way,” said Jerry.

“Do whatever you like. Just make sure he doesn’t come around here anymore.”

∗    ∗    ∗

After they closed the restaurant, Jerry asked John to take a ride with him. “Let’s go someplace we can talk,” he said.

Yes, I’m finally getting what I deserve
. John was excited. He’d wanted a piece of the action ever since he figured out how the boss really made his money. That’s why he’d put up with the waiter bullshit for over two years. Because of Cara, he finally had his opportunity.

Caught up in thoughts of his good fortune, John didn’t stop to wonder where they were going. When Jerry merged onto the freeway and headed towards Ogden, John figured they must be going to see someone else, someone outside the restaurant. He leaned back in the seat and relaxed. His life was about to get interesting.

∗    ∗    ∗

Jerry pulled the car down an alleyway near the railroad tracks and parked. Ogden was about as rough as it got in Utah, which wasn’t saying much. It was a former railroad town and people from all over the country had settled there. Jerry figured a mugging would be more believable if it happened in Ogden. Park City was out of the question. The place was as quiet as a tomb.

“All right kid, we’re here. Let’s go.” Jerry climbed out.

“Great,” said John. He opened the car door with enthusiasm. “So who are we meeting? You gonna hook me up with distribution or sales or what?”

“Neither. Let’s talk for a minute.”

“Yeah, sure.” John walked over to Jerry’s side of the car.