Dangerous Beauty: Part Three: This is War (54 page)

Yes, Nathan had once been obsessed with finding his mother’s killer and obliterating them, but that was in the past. Although Silas was the person that had killed her, Nathan had to keep the conversation on what was important: making sure his family was safe from any further attacks.

After a moment of silence, Angelo nodded his head and placed a hand on Nathan’s shoulder. “Very well, son.” He sighed, and lightly patted Nathan’s cheek as his brows slowly furrowed into a frown. “Nathan,” he said a bit uncomfortably before clearing his throat, “back at the meeting with Paolo, you laughed when he’d said—”

Shaking his head, Nathan took a step back from his father. “No, Pop,” he cut him off quickly. “We
really
don’t have to discuss that.” Nathan had thought about confronting his father about his mother’s past over and over again, but he came to the conclusion that it was not a good idea. How the fuck did a son yell at his father for keeping his deceased mother’s past as a prostitute a secret without it getting incredibly fucking awkward? There was no way. It was just that fucked up of a situation.

Angelo’s frown deepened before realization hit him and he gasped. “Oh fuck, you know!” he yelled.

He feigned ignorance … big time. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” He shook his head as his gaze fell awkwardly to the side.

“Nathan!” he said sharply.

He groaned in frustration. “I think we can both agree that I’m a son that doesn’t ask you for much, but I’m begging you right now to please let this go, P—”

“You do know!” he yelled angrily, interrupting Nathan. “Who told you?”

“A dead man.” At least Nathan believed the man was dead, but he really didn’t know. He’d let Adrien go home a while ago—after Anastacia refused to let him meet Carter—and the man hadn’t been seen or heard from since. Nathan was pretty sure that Silas had killed him.

His father speaking brought him back from his musings.

“
How
… why wouldn’t you say anything, son? Why would you keep that from me?”

Briefly closing his eyes, he snorted.
Really?
“I could have asked you the same questions, but I didn’t because I prefer to not talk about it.”

“Nathan, I …” Sighing, Angelo ran his hand over his face. “I could have talked to you. I’ve could have explained everything to you.”

“What is there to explain?” His mother was a prostitute, his father got her pregnant, and they fled to America … Nathan really didn’t want to dive into all the semantics, nor did he care. “I don’t need to know any more than I already know. Everything just … makes sense now, Pop, its fine.”

“No, it’s not fine, Nathan. What makes sense?”

Nathan groaned. This was so fucking stupid. “Why you two couldn’t stand each other. Why you fought all the time.” He released a long breath. “You didn’t love her, and I get that. You only got married because of me.”

“Nathan, son. I did love your mother—”

Nathan shook his head and walked away before his father could even finish talking. He’d almost made it to the door, but his father grabbed his arm and turned him around. Now angry, Nathan lost control. “Pop,” he yelled sharply. “I told you I’m not talking about this!”

“Nathan, listen to me! How could you ever think that I didn’t love your mother?”

“Because you didn’t! You just didn’t, and I am fine with that. That’s what I’m trying to tell you.” He spoke as clearly as he could so that his father would get the picture. “Discussing your relationship with my mother is a road that you and I should not be going down. Even mentioning her name to you is still new for me.” He pointed between himself and his father. “We just fixed this not too long ago. Why would you want to fuck up all of the progress we’ve made just to talk about something I know is true?”

“Because it’s not true.” Angelo came forward to stand in front of his son. “Perhaps that is what we did wrong in the past, not talking. Maybe if we would have just said what was on our minds, we wouldn’t have spent all those years tiptoeing around the subject of your mother. Avoiding shit doesn’t work for us anymore, so let’s talk.”

Nathan threw up his hands in anger. “Fine!” he yelled. “Fine. You want to talk about it? Be real? You really think that would do some good?”

Angelo nodded his head. “Yes, son. I do. Just … talk to me for once.”

Nathan clenched his jaw tight as he stared at his father and battled with himself on the inside. He didn’t know if talking was a good idea, but what did he really have to lose now? He was already pissed. Nathan ran his hand down his face before turning his narrowed eyes on his father. “I was blindsided,” he said in a low tone. “You had countless chances to tell me, but you didn’t.”

“No time seemed like a good time to broach the subject of your mother’s past with you, Nathan. You didn’t even allow me to say her name in your presence.”

“I know that!” he yelled, hating the truth in his father’s excuse. “I understand how difficult it would be to tell your son such a thing about his deceased mother, but I’m still upset about it. The whole situation is infuriating.” As he said it, Nathan realized he not only admitted the words to his father, but also to himself. He was pretty sure he’d been in denial. “She cried … all of the time. She would try to hide it, but I always knew. I just didn’t understand why she was so unhappy, I don’t know,” he muttered, and looked away uncomfortably. Damn this was hard. “I guess I just … I think that she did love you. You just couldn’t love her because she was a—”

“Stop,” Angelo whispered firmly. Closing his eyes, he released a deep breath. “I did this.” He looked up at Nathan, his eyes filled with regret. “Son, I owe you an apology. This is my fault. The man I am, the man I was to your mother. Of course you would think that I didn’t love her.” He placed his hand to his heart. “I loved your mother. It didn’t start out that way, and I did only marry her because she was pregnant with you. But when she and I moved in together, when we were expecting you, things just changed. We had started off so nervous around each other, but as time passed we entered into this world where we existed as husband and wife.”

“Then what the hell happened?” Nathan asked.

Angelo’s eyes lowered in shame. “I ruined my relationship with your mother the same way I ruined every other relationship I’ve ever had … selfishness. I put myself before her, and I poisoned the happiness we once had. I betrayed her, broke her trust, and blamed her for taking me away from someone who probably never wanted me back in the first place.”

He immediately knew who his father was talking about. “Anastacia?”

Angelo shook his head. “It doesn’t matter, Nathan. What matters is I was a shit husband, but I loved your mother. I mourned her when she was taken from us. I visit her grave, I keep the flowers fresh myself because I know how she’d like them. Not a day goes by where I don’t regret how badly things ended between us. Hell, there was even a time when I wanted to fix our relationship.”

Nathan frowned at that. “Why?”

Angelo shrugged. “I’ve always been a fucking bastard. Out of the two women I’ve ever loved, your mother was the woman that stayed the longest. But eventually they all leave, whether it be through divorce, death … or fucking
my oldest friend
.”

Nathan chuckled. “You are an old, bitter ass, Pop. You’re never going to stop talking about them are you?”

Laughing softly, Angelo slapped Nathan on the back. “You call me old one more time, I’m going to kick your little blond ass.” He gave Nathan’s cheek a loving pat. “Tell me how you feel now,
figilo
.”

Nathan nodded. “Better, Papa. Thank you.” He hadn’t thought talking to his father would help, but it did. It made him feel better to know that his parents did love each other and they hadn’t just tried to force it because of him. Nathan may have been created under unconventional circumstances, but he still felt blessed. His parents weren’t perfect people, but they loved him, and gave him a better life than they’d had growing up.

Angelo kissed Nathan’s forehead. “Anytime, son. Now come,” he slapped Nathan’s back, “it’s nearly time for that call …”

“Don’t remind me,” Nathan grumbled as they headed out of the office door.

Chapter 21: The call . . .

Light tapping was all that could be heard. It sounded like a pencil, but Nathan didn’t know because he wasn’t doing the tapping, Silas was.

“How is my daughter?” Silas asked.

She’s not your fucking daughter!
Was what Nathan wanted to say, but he went with smart instead of stupid. “She is well.”
Keep the answers short and sweet
.

“Maksim and Aleksandr. They are well?”

Nathan blinked rapidly, trying to contain his temper. “Yes, my sons are well.” He released a long breath after he said the words.

“And you, how are you?”

Umm … Considering that I’m on the phone with the man that killed my mother, shot me, kidnapped my wife, and then did a drive-by on my mother’s childhood home with my wife and family inside? How the fuck do you think I’m doing!
“I’m fine,” Nathan answered, silently wondering if Silas was going to mention any of things he’d done.

“That’s good,” he said with an eerie brightness in his tone. “I am glad you and Carterina got my letters. I must say, I was expecting her to call but she didn’t. Did she say anything about what I wrote, or the gifts I sent?”

Well, Nathan got his answer quickly. Silas was most likely not going to say a word about any of it, which was a good thing. If Silas said one word about his mother he knew he’d snap before they’d had any talk about peace.

Just answer, Nathan, and get this over with,
he thought to himself. “She hasn’t said much, but I’m sure you can understand that. She’s very confused right now. Not too long ago she didn’t even know you existed. Robert is the father she knows, and the one she feels comfortable with.”

“So she said nothing of my gifts then?”

Nathan frowned.
What?

“I had them custom made for the infants. I wanted to show her how much I care. Did her mother see them, and Gabriel? Did they appreciate my efforts?”

Nathan sat up straight in his seat. What the hell was this man talking about? Who the fuck cared about some pointless fucking gifts? “Silas, to be honest, I don’t think they cared,” Nathan said, hoping the conversation would hurry up and venture toward the topic in which he’d called to discuss in the first place.

“What do you mean they didn’t care?” he asked.

Nathan sighed, annoyed. “I mean they didn’t say anything about them, Steele. Carter had no interest in keeping them, Anastacia was upset that you wrote her daughter, and Gabriel didn’t acknowledge them, or any talk of you.”

Silence.

“Hello?” Nathan said, wondering if Silas had hung up. “Are you still there, Silas?”

“Hmm … I expected them to be impressed by the gesture,” Silas muttered, as if talking to himself. “Well did she say she wanted something else? I have plenty of money, anything she wants she can have it.”

Nathan’s jaw ticked. Why wouldn’t he just let it go? “Silas, that’s the thing. Carterina doesn’t want anything from you.”

Silence.

“Hello?” Nathan snapped.

“Why wouldn’t she want anything from me, boy?” he asked, his tone clipped and angry.

“Because not everyone can be bought, Steele,” Nathan answered honestly. “My wife has all that she needs, and she is not interested in anything you have to give her. You need to snap into reality and realize that while you are responsible for her being here, you are not her father. Robert is. She doesn’t know you, Silas. When you visited she thought you were Robert. Therefore, regardless of what you say to her, in her heart it was her father doing all those things with her.”

After a brief moment of silence, Silas chuckled. “What was I thinking? You are absolutely right. Robbie is Carterina’s father, not me. After all I have done, to just expect that she would forgive my actions after a few gifts is lunacy.” Nathan heard him clap his hands. “Well, now that we have caught up, what do you say we start talking peace?”

Nathan nodded slowly, happy that they were getting back on track with things. “Yes. I only have one term for peace, Silas. Then this war will end.”

“Please share.”

“Leave my family alone.” It was one simple action, and Nathan wanted to see if Silas could actually adhere to it. “My wife, Anastacia, and Gabriel are included in my family.”

“But they are my family,” he said quietly.

“They are not. They have broken ties with you. You have lost them …”

Silas let out a low laugh. “No. My world doesn’t work like that. I cannot lose what is mine, young man.”

“That’s the thing, Silas; they are not yours. Gabriel and Anastacia have moved on, and Carterina is my wife, she belongs to me.”

“I don’t think so,” Silas stated, beginning to sound angry.

“It is the truth, Silas.”

“The truth? It is not—”

“Silas, this is a simple request—” Nathan stated, speaking over him.

“But you said so yourself,
boy
,
I am the reason she is here!
” he roared, making Nathan pause, surprised by the abrupt change in Silas’s mood. The man went from zero to sixty just like that. Only a second ago he was speaking to Nathan calmly, and all of a sudden he’d snapped.