Darkness Surrendered (Primal Heat Trilogy #3) (Order of the Blade) (8 page)

Flashes of pain and torture began crowding his mind, and his body began to shake.

“Shit.” Gideon stood up. “He’s snapping again.”

“No. I’m not.” Elijah could tell the difference. He was being stalked by the nightmares, but he wasn’t losing his mind. With Ana hanging onto him, he was still in the present. Still had a thread of a grip on reality. He knew the shadows weren’t real, and he’d take that. Yeah, he had the most hellish images racing through his mind, and his stomach was churning...but his head was still clear.

Or clear in comparison to what it was when she wasn’t touching him.

He’d take sane and fucked up over insane and homicidal any day.

Elijah suddenly realized the Order was standing around him, weapons still out, watching him with a wariness that made him feel like a crazed animal. He struggled to sit up, barely able to keep himself from wincing at the pain that knifed through his body. He kept one arm tight around Ana, even though it hurt like hell to use either arm.

“Stop looking so damn worried. I’m fine.” No one looked convinced, and he had to grant them that. They were right not to relax around him. “How come no one’s tried to kill my
sheva
?” The Order was the only thing standing in defense of humanity against rogue Calydons, so when an Order member met his
sheva
, she had to be sacrificed to allow her mate to continue fighting to protect humanity. It was either that or let him go rogue and destroy the entire fucking world. No Order
sheva
could be allowed to live, but no one was making a move toward Ana.

“Because she can pull you back from total insanity.” Gideon grabbed Elijah’s arm to pull him to his feet. “Always a bonus when a woman can do that for you.” His voice got a little thick as Quinn grabbed Elijah’s other arm, and the two of them hauled him up. “I thought we’d lost you for sure, Elijah.” His gaze flicked to Ana. “Nice work.”

“My good deed for the day.” She managed a smile as she tucked herself under Elijah’s arm, between Quinn and Elijah. It was exactly where Elijah needed her, pressed up against his side, and at the same time, his mind recoiled from the images haunting him. His soul needed her, his spirit craved her, but his mind saw her as the enemy. What the hell? He pulled her closer, needing her touch, but even as he did it, he realized she was too close to get away from him in time if he snapped. Shit. What the hell was he going to do?

She looked at him, and he saw a wealth of conflict in her eyes. Like she
knew
what was going on inside his head. “You won’t hurt me.”

“Fuck that,” he said. “I will.” Hell, if only she knew what he was, she wouldn’t look at him like he was a damned hero.

“You need a shower,” Quinn interrupted. “You smell like shit, and you look worse.”

He and Gideon started dragging Elijah toward the stairs, his busted leg trailing behind him. Elijah gritted his teeth against the pain, sweat pouring down his face as he tried to keep it together. “I don’t need to be carried.”

“Yeah, I know, tough guy.” Quinn shot him a look. “Because they’re all just scratches, right?”

“Right.” Elijah glanced behind him at the Order trailing after them, grimacing at all their wounds. Had he really done that? He caught Ana looking at him, and she gave a slight nod.
Yes, that was you.

He tensed, realizing she could touch his mind through the
sheva
bond. Shit. He didn’t like the idea of anyone knowing what was going on in his head. Especially now. He tried to raise his mental shields against her, but as soon as he started to, the demons started circling again. He felt his control begin to slide, felt the familiar paranoia returning.

He swore again, and let his barriers fall, opening himself to her. The minute he did, his body relaxed and the demons settled, but the nightmares and memories caused by Ana rose to replace them. Too many memories racing though his mind, but again, he knew they were only memories, and he could tell they weren’t real, so he’d take it. It was a hell that didn’t make him crazy, so that was better than where he’d been. But he wasn’t okay, not by a long shot. At some point, they weren’t going to be able to get him back when he went off, and then they were in trouble.

Thano limped ahead and hauled open the door to the corridor. Blood was coagulating in the wound in his shoulder...a wound that looked like bite marks? “Did I
bite
you?” The question was out before he could stop himself.

Thano shrugged. “You haven’t eaten in a while. It’s all good.”

As Gideon and Quinn dragged Elijah up the stairs, he glanced at the rest of the Order. He saw Ryland with his hand over his heart, blood seeping between his fingers. Holy crap. He’d really tried to kill them all. How the hell was it possible to lose his grip on reality so completely that he tried to kill his own team?

It wasn’t over.

It would never be over.

The fear that had been stalking him his whole life had finally become reality.

Ryland raised an eyebrow. “Kill Ezekiel and I’ll forgive you.”

A spike of adrenaline pulsed through Elijah, as it always did when he heard the name of the ruthless bastard who nearly destroyed the world two thousand years ago. “Ezekiel? What’s he got to do with anything?”

“He escaped from his prison.” Gideon said.

Elijah went cold, and he fought to keep his face impassive. Instinctively, he tightened his grip on Ana, pulling her tighter against him, into the shield of his body where he could protect her. “
What?”

Quinn nodded. “He got out three days ago. Our battle with him was what collapsed the tunnels.”

“No fucking way.” Elijah fought to get free of his friends’ grip, then doubled over at the pain that shot through him, at the fresh blood pouring from his gut. “I need to go after him.”

“Yeah, you do,” Gideon agreed easily. “But not until you’ve slept.” He and Quinn dragged him toward the staircase to the second floor.

Elijah hung his head, gritting his teeth against the wave of nausea from the pain. “I don’t have time to sleep. I need to go after Ezekiel now.” But even as he said it, he looked down at the woman holding him up. His heart bled for the faded bruises on her arms, for the determined set to her mouth. He had to keep her safe. Had to protect her from Ezekiel. She was connected with him. Ezekiel would know, and he would target her.

Ana looked up at him, and her eyes widened. “What’s wrong?”

Elijah shook his head, uncomfortable that she sensed there was more driving him than Ezekiel being free. “I need to stop him. Now.”

Gideon shot him a sharp look. “He’ll kill you in a split second if you go now. You can’t even stand. You need to go into the healing sleep and then we’ll go.”

“No. I go now.” He had to intercept the bastard before Ezekiel came after him. Had to strike before Ezekiel knew he was coming. “Let me go!” Elijah struggled to get loose again, and his leg bumped Gideon’s. Pain shot through him, and his head started to spin.

Jesus.
He was going to pass out? Maybe being insane was better, because feeling pain was inconvenient as hell.

Gideon and Quinn tightened their grips, and he knew they sensed he was about to faint. No damn way was he going to pass out in front of the Order.
No way.
There were some limits that a man had to have.

Ana hugged his waist.
Take deep breaths. It’ll go away.

Deep breaths. Right. He sucked in air like a goddamn freight train.

“We already tried to take Ezekiel out, and we had no chance. He’s far too powerful,” Gideon said. “It’s like it was two thousand years ago, when the only person who could defeat him was his own brother.”

Elijah tensed, his heart starting to race. Had they found out about him?

Quinn helped him over the top step. “Ana learned you were descended from Caleb, Ezekiel’s brother.”

Elijah had to struggle to keep his face impassive. Shit.
They knew
. What else did they know? They’d kill him for sure if they knew the rest.

Ana looked up at him, her brow furrowed in a small frown, and he immediately tried to empty his mind so she wouldn’t catch his thoughts. No one could know.

“So, we’re hoping that you inherited whatever Caleb had that enabled him to take down Ezekiel in the first place,” Quinn said. “If you didn’t, we’re all screwed. If you did, party at the mansion after you take him out.”

“I’ll take him out.” Hell, Elijah had been waiting for this chance for over five hundred years.

Gideon shot him a raised brow as they headed down the upstairs hall. “You know how to kill him?”

“No. But I’ll figure it out.” His friends dragged him over a threshold into one of the spare bedrooms of Dante’s mansion. There were female things strewn over the room, and it smelled like flowers and sunshine. Elijah knew instantly that this room was where Ana had been staying. Her scent was all over the place. His groin tightened at the sight of the tangled sheets on the bed, and the thought of Ana sleeping in them.

He swore again. How could he possibly be thinking about her when Ezekiel was out?
Get a grip, man
.

Thano opened the door to the bathroom, and Gideon and Quinn carried him into the shower. Damn. This was just an embarrassment now. They weren’t going to sponge bathe him, were they? “Hell, everyone’s going to shower with me?”

“No,” Quinn said. “Just Ana.”

Ana.
Hot desire raced through Elijah, and he looked down at the woman still tucked against his side. She looked up, and he saw the flare of passion in her eyes. Awareness and desire lunged through him at the realization that she was feeling the same call he was. He touched her jaw, and satisfaction pulsed through him when her cheeks flushed.

Quinn cleared his throat. “Elijah.”

Shit. What was he doing? Elijah looked at his friend as Quinn leaned him up against the wall. “I don’t have time for a shower—”

“Yes, you do.” Quinn set his hands on either shoulder, and Elijah winced at the pain. Something in Quinn’s eyes indicated he had an idea of exactly how badly Elijah wanted to go after Ezekiel. They’d been blood bonded for five hundred years, and both Quinn and Gideon had a direct link to Elijah’s emotions unless he actively worked to shield them. And even then, sometimes they were still able to get hits.

“I forbid you from going after Ezekiel until you’ve healed and we’ve put together a team plan.” Quinn’s voice was firm, and unrelenting. “We do this together, and we do it right. Caleb needed his team’s help to take Ezekiel out two thousand years ago, and you’ll need us. Got it?”

Elijah narrowed his eyes. “Since when are you leader?”

Quinn’s eyebrows went up. “Since when do you need me to pull rank to get you to listen to strategic advice that makes sense?”

Elijah swore under his breath. “Yeah, you’re right.” Shit. He was a mess. “I’m not taking time to sleep. I’ll meet you all downstairs in five minutes.”

“Really?” Quinn’s eyes narrowed, and he released Elijah with a hard shove. Elijah lost his balance and tried to catch himself with his gimpy leg. It gave out, and he crashed to the floor of the shower. He landed on Ana, who gave a small yelp as he slammed her into the tile.
Shit.
He tried to roll off her, and pain shot down his back so badly he couldn’t suppress his groan.

Quinn glowered down at him. “Yeah, skip the healing sleep. That sounds like a great plan. You’re clearly ready to take on Ezekiel.”

Elijah leaned his head against the tile floor, unable to lift it. He gritted his teeth, fighting against the pain. Ana set her hand on his hair, the softest damn touch he’d ever felt, and he focused on that sensation, using her touch to ground himself. “I should’ve killed you,” he growled at Quinn.

Quinn snorted. “Sleep, you dumb ass, or you’re no good to anyone. You died once. Don’t try it again.” Then his eyes softened and he grinned. “Damn, it’s good to see you buddy. We’re glad as hell you’re back.” He slugged Elijah on the shoulder, then looked at Ana, his eyes burning with emotion. “Thanks.”

She nodded as she wrapped her arm around Elijah’s neck, an embrace that felt so amazing that Elijah suddenly wanted nothing more than to just shut it all down and fall into how good she felt. “Of course,” she said.

Quinn hesitated, looking back and forth between them, and for a moment, Elijah expected Quinn to decide against leaving an Order member with his
sheva.
For two thousand years, Order policy had been to kill the
sheva
of any Order member before the bond could make him go rogue. Order members were too critical, and the
sheva
always had to be sacrificed. Elijah tensed, ready to defend her—

Gideon touched Quinn’s shoulder. “Let them be. They’re good. You know they are.”

The two Order members exchanged glances, then Quinn nodded, and walked out. Gideon and Thano followed, and the door slammed shut behind them, leaving Elijah sprawled across the tile and Ana like some useless piece of crap.